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1eyedking Darkest Dungeon: The Story of the Iceberg - Review by Celerity

Goral

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The Real Fanboy
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Strange that no one has commented this part:

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Darkest Dungeon developers should be put on a shitlist for a thing like that just like it was with Double Bear.
The difference between "professional" and "non-professional" is like the difference between cleaning your toilet every day and cleaning it every week.

It's not the difference between shitting in a toilet and shitting your pants
Badly used analogy, it's more like the difference between cleaning whole toilet (including the lid and places hard to get to) and cleaning just the bowl. Or a difference between a jew doing business and a negro doing business.
 

Western

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Codex 2012 Codex 2014 Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2
The difference between "professional" and "non-professional" is like the difference between cleaning your toilet every day and cleaning it every week.

It's not the difference between shitting in a toilet and shitting your pants

If the Codex shit its pants more regularly it would separate itself from the pack and, everyone would slow down to see the spectacle.

It's time to ride the wave of this site's unique brand of autistic madness.
 

Goral

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Bubbles would put it on the front page. Thanks to him we've had this colossal gem: http://www.rpgcodex.net/article.php?id=10267

Sadly, with him gone Infinitron holds all the cards and decides what will go and what won't so we won't get critical Torment review or Tyranny or other Obsidian/inXile games (or if we will it will be a year after release). But negative reviews of indie gems will be accepted without question even though they will hurt indie producers but they wouldn't hurt such big companies as inXile or Obsidian. That's the thing I don't get, why is Infinitron shilling this much for these companies? Did they promise him a spot once sea/BN will be kicked out or what?
 

Prime Junta

Guest
Oh wow.

Celerity there's material there for at least three articles.

(1) Review of the game itself. Fuck the drama with Red Hook, Steam reviews etc., just explain what the game is trying to do, whether it's worth trying, and how it succeeds (or, as the case may be, fails). Maybe add some short thoughts on how the failures could be remedied since you have some clear ideas about that.

(2) Report about Red Hook, their community relations, the Kickstarter, what was promised, what was delivered, and the way they deal with negative reviews.

(3) FAQ/strategy guide/let's-play of the game itself.

Right now all three are all mixed together in one epic stream-of-consciousness rant, which just makes you look deranged. If you managed to disentangle them you would get your message across better, as well as producing something that's readable in its own right rather than for lulz or drama. If it's just one article, it should be the review, with tops one paragraph about the drama at the beginning or the end. Consider writing the other two as completely separate projects.
 
Weasel
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If you managed to disentangle them you would get your message across better, as well as producing something that's readable in its own right rather than for lulz or drama. If it's just one article, it should be the review, with tops one paragraph about the drama at the beginning or the end. Consider writing the other two as completely separate projects.

It's been leaked now though, so it can't be changed :negative:
 

Infinitron

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Codex Year of the Donut Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Wrath I'm very into cock and ball torture I helped put crap in Monomyth
Bubbles would put it on the front page. Thanks to him we've had this colossal gem: http://www.rpgcodex.net/article.php?id=10267

Haha please, you're making Bubbles out to be some shitposting god now. The man was angry about things but he was also a proper Something Awful forum goon who didn't approve of things like off-topic racist ranting. This review wouldn't have been his style.
 

Kz3r0

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Darkest Dungeon is by far the biggest travesty and scam in gaming history simply by virtue of the sheer dissonance between what it could have been and what it actually was, and the sheer dissonance between how it is described and how it actually is.
From:
Celerity
:bravo:
 

Goral

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Right now all three are all mixed together in one epic stream-of-consciousness rant, which just makes you look deranged.
And yet it is far more enjoyable to read than any of the beyond banal generic drivel that you have written for this website.
Plus it's honest at least whereas PJ said at one place that it's bland and in his review that it "has the makings of a cult classic".

Seriously, I'll probably get it eventually, but I'm not paying full price for a game I have to force myself to play.

Yeah no, I wouldn't recommend this as a full-price buy unless you're a rabid Obsidian fanboy, really really into CYOAs, or rich. Or just don't much care about gameplay. DA:I has lots of fans and it has bland, boring, repetitive gameplay too.
Something Awful forum goon who didn't approve of things like off-topic racist ranting.
I don't know what you're talking about. :M
 

Prime Junta

Guest
PJ said at one place that it's bland and in his review that it "has the makings of a cult classic"

Bland, boring, and repetitive gameplay does not preclude other characteristics that may give a game lasting appeal. In Tyranny's case, a well thought-out setting and tons and tons of story branching. I.e. those two statements are not contradictory.
 
Self-Ejected

Sacred82

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Can't wait to read Celerity's review of Grimoire.


New autist versus old autist. Which generation will win and why?

The crackerjack programmer is the safe bet as he has played through a vast number of survival and combat scenarios in his imagination, so he's well prepared. Plus his lard tub physique can take the force out of Celerity's strongest attacks, while his dull but persistent nagging could wreak havoc upon someone as socially incapacitated as Celerity.

The systems analyst is the underdog here, it remains to be seen wether with his knack for abusing imbalanced systems he can find the weak spots in Cleve's protective mantle of complacent fat. It's also possible that his severe autism will shield him from Cleve's repeated attempts at spewing sarcastic venom, though it could also cause him to become increasingly volatile and cause damage to kittens and other vulnerable objects in his vicinity. That and the fact that he's living in a spice tank make him a bit of a wildcard here.
 
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