Tacticular Cancer: We'll have your balls

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In Progress Hatoful Boyfriend: I want to be a Pigeon!

Discussion in 'Codex Playground' started by LundB, Feb 20, 2012.

  1. treave Arcane Patron

    treave
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    Codex 2012
    Click here and disable ads!
    No point in being nice to your childhood chick. Keep the job.
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  2. Brother None Prestigious Gentleman On the line for InXile

    Brother None
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    5,396
    Yeah, gotta take the job in the classy stripclub.
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  3. Lindblum Learned

    Lindblum
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    Keep it.
    Can't give your buddy a free show.

    Suturipu Crubbu.
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  4. Ulminati The Dong Whisperer Patron

    Ulminati
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    Classy stripping is the way to go.

    If only some of the birdies were disabled, RK47 might feel more at home :smug:
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  5. treave Arcane Patron

    treave
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    Isn't there an option to replace everybirdie with bishonen representatives? For that matter, is the full game worth five bucks?
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  6. RK47 Incline Breaker Patron

    RK47
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    Dead State Divinity: Original Sin
    ....considering I paid zero to romance a blind girl ($27 fruit cake non-withstanding), errr....why should you?
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  7. treave Arcane Patron

    treave
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    Point taken. Still, to talk turkey, the price is chicken-feed and I half-enjoyed what I saw in the demo, which was already as crazy as a loon. I just wondered if there was enough content in the full game to warrant five bucks. Does the heroine get her goose cooked in many terrible ways? That sort of thing.
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  8. lightbane Liturgist

    lightbane
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    Blessed Emperor, this game is becoming more and more inane... Anyways, I vote to keep the job.
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  9. IronicNeurotic Arbiter

    IronicNeurotic
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    1,110
    It's worth it. If only for the conclusion of everything which is really, really great and also throws the other endings into a new light.

    I'm bad at proverbs.
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  10. Hellraiser Arcane

    Hellraiser
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    Danzig, Potato-Hitman Commonwealth
    Keep the job.

    [​IMG]

    :what:

    Alright now this is starting to get weird. Outside of all the pigeon dating and the creepy doctors, and cave-dwelling hunter-gatherer of course. Although I think I now know what really is going on...
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  11. Ulminati The Dong Whisperer Patron

    Ulminati
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    I'm still waiting for the special forces to show up. And the demon-inside-a-tree.
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  12. GarfunkeL Racism Expert

    GarfunkeL
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    Insert clever insult here
    I can't stand this insanity any more.
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  13. Ion Prothon II Liturgist

    Ion Prothon II
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    Location:
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    Oh my God...

    [​IMG]

    Watching the LP is like reading the blasphemous tome of Necronomicon over someone's shoulder :lol:
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  14. Johannes Arcane

    Johannes
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    The game is set in the aftermath of a Hitchcocks Birds apocalypse scenario?
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  15. LundB Mistakes were made.

    LundB
    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2012
    Messages:
    3,323
    Says the man with the loli Hitler avatar.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    In this update, unprofessional customer interaction and racism.

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]: Don't worry about it, RK47. I've got a couple more places to check.
    [​IMG]: Perhaps some other time. I will be here, if you are looking for something later on.
    [​IMG]: I'll keep that in mind, sir. Have fun, RK47!

    It's almost opening time. I'm kind of nervous, but I'm not about to mess up after taking the job from Ryouta! I wonder who the first customer of my life will be...

    [​IMG]

    A budgerigar steps in the door. The first customer of my life... A young man who doesn't quite suit the atmosphere of the cafe. I was hoping for somebirdie who'd raise a few more flags! Maybe a white peacock.

    [​IMG]: Welcome! Would you like a bath? Or a meal?

    ED: They offer baths... this really is some sort of high-end strip club.

    [​IMG]: Or maybe you'd like mister Urushihara?
    [​IMG]: I'll take Kenzaburou... Hey, wait just a minute, now!

    ED::troll:

    Yes! A perfect delayed reaction!

    [​IMG]: Oh, hello, Rabu. This is Rabu, miss RK47. A regular customer.
    [​IMG]: I'm something of an important figure here. See this card? 206 stamps.

    Amazing. Is he a cafe-addict?

    [​IMG]: Hey, what was with that when I came in?
    [​IMG]: I've wanted to provoke that reaction out of somebirdie with a Kansai accent since I was a little girl! Thank you, mister Rabu! Thanks to you, my dream has come true, and I can die happy!
    [​IMG]: Y'all lost me on the roadside, there.

    ED: You and me both, birdie.

    [​IMG]: Well, that's how it is. RK47, right? That seat there is my private property. Y'all remember that, now.
    [​IMG]: A new encounter in the little birdcage... today is a good day. I shall make some coffee to celebrate. Please, sit down, both of you.

    And so the three of us enjoyed an early afternoon pot of coffee. Wait, aren't I supposed to be working?

    [​IMG]

    On my own, of course! Riding the stormy waves of life alone is what we humans are all about.

    ED: Not like we're social creatures or anything... have the pigeons brainwashed people into believing this so that they won't band together and rebel?

    [​IMG]: Hey, human.
    [​IMG]: Wha...

    Music: Racial Tension

    [​IMG]

    ED: Who all appear to be dark feathered, unlike the white majority. And they're criminals... :kfc:

    [​IMG]
    ED: :hmmm: Punkgeons. PUNKGEONS.

    [​IMG]: I bet a rich little girl like you gets a lot of pocket money from daddy, huh? Rich little girl going to a fancy school, thinks she's so great.
    [​IMG]: Gh..!

    [​IMG]

    I can pick Ryouta out of a crowd about eighty percent of the time, but the rock doves I've just met all look the same!

    ED: RK47-chan, that is racist (lol 80% of the time recognizing your best friend). Also conforming to stereotypes, Ryouta, the only other dark-feathered pigeon, is a high-schooler who has to work multiple jobs to support his mother, since his father appears to be absent. This game is not just sexually deviant, it is sexually deviant and RACIST. Sort of like the Codex.

    [​IMG]: Do you have some business with me? If not, go away!
    [​IMG]: Hey, that's not nice. Show us some cash, first. Cash... or something else worth our while.

    ED::rage: RK47-chan, you're going to get gang-raped by punkgeons.

    They buff up their chests, threateningly.

    [​IMG]: Dumb punks! Picking on girls in the park is a good way to get ostracized for life.
    [​IMG]: What?
    [​IMG]: What!?
    [​IMG]: You little--

    They're angry now. My hunter-gatherer instincts can feel a fight coming. Three pigeons on my own... Can I win this..?

    ED: They have hollow bones... this shouldn't be hard unless you're a Katawa Shoujo.

    Slam! THUD! [punching noises]

    [​IMG]: !?

    The work of a moment. A dim figure flits out of the shadows, and an instant later, two of the punkgeons are on the ground. And the grand victor is--

    Music: Keeping the black bird down.

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]: That was close, RK47. Are you sure you should be out this late?
    [​IMG]: What the fuck! Who are you!?
    [​IMG]: Me? Well... I'm the takoyaki lady!

    [sounds of socioeconomically inevitable violence]

    The punkgeon collapses before the might of Azami's majestic kick.

    [​IMG]: S-sorry, Azami! I let my guard down!
    [​IMG]: Easy for a kid to do. Life lesson! Always be prepared! Speak softly, and drive a Sherman tank!

    [​IMG]

    She's so cool! I think I'm in love..!

    ED: Lesbian route unlocked!? :thumbsup:

    [​IMG]: Umm, Azami? I'm working at a cafe near here over the summer. Could I treat you to something sometime, as thanks?
    [​IMG]: Is that part of your credo, kid? Good by me.

    Azami takes the proffered flier, mounts her trusty scooter, and putts off into the darkness. A heroic entrance, and a cool exit! I hope I can be like her when I grow up!

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    Well everybirdie, who should we take?
    Ryouta, our hard working minority childhood friend?
    Sakuya, the rich aristocrat?
    Nageki, the library bird?
    Yuuya, the ladies bird?
    San, the pudding obsessive
    Kazuaki, the disappointed teacher?
    or Shuu, everyone's favorite creepy doctor? Ho ho ho ho.
    Erica Falx Brofists this.
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  16. IronicNeurotic Arbiter

    IronicNeurotic
    Joined:
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    1,110
    Shuu. Shuu.

    SHUUUUUUUUUU~~

    Also Azami is bestbird.
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  17. Ulminati The Dong Whisperer Patron

    Ulminati
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    Ho ho ho there is only one way to go
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  18. GarfunkeL Racism Expert

    GarfunkeL
    Joined:
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    13,015
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    Insert clever insult here
    At least she's still human. OH THE BURN!

    ...

    Shuu, let's see how deep the rabbit hole goes.
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  19. IronicNeurotic Arbiter

    IronicNeurotic
    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2010
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    1,110
    We won't. It will be awesome but we won't. You actually have to play multiple times to get an understanding of what is "actually" happening.
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  20. Ulminati The Dong Whisperer Patron

    Ulminati
    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2010
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    Location:
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    That statement is slightly misleading. If you play it multiple times you realize a lot more is going on. But to go as far as to claim people will get an understanding of this mindfuck seems wrong.

    Not as wrong as fucking a pigeon though.
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  21. Cowboy Moment Arcane

    Cowboy Moment
    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2011
    Messages:
    3,198
    Are those supposed to be spiked shoulderpads on the punk pigeons?

    Codex doesn't have an emote for what I feel at this moment.
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  22. SerratedBiz Augur

    SerratedBiz
    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2009
    Messages:
    2,510
    I can't wait to see what's in store for our minds beyond the threshold to the abyss. If Shu is teh creepy doctor pigeon, Shu it is.
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  23. Lindblum Learned

    Lindblum
    Joined:
    May 3, 2011
    Messages:
    649
    SHUU

    "Its bigger inside than on the outside."
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  24. Johannes Arcane

    Johannes
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    How about a pigeon shitting on your chest though?
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