Tacticular Cancer: We'll have your balls

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Completed Let's play Wizardry!

Discussion in 'Codex Playground' started by Crooked Bee, Nov 27, 2011.

  1. octavius Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    octavius
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    Stupid Gaider who tried to backstab a slime. How can you succesfully backstab something that doesn't have a spine?

    Anyway, this LP almost makes me want to try the pre-Bane Wizardries, while CRPG Addict's blog had the opposite effect.
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  2. lightbane Liturgist

    lightbane
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    True that.
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  3. Crooked Bee Nyadmin Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2014 MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2
    [​IMG] Well, some of our fans were saying the combat wasn't tactical enough.

    [​IMG] And we at Bethesda always listen to our fans, you know.

    [​IMG] So we thought: why only have dragons fly forward? There's just no room for tactics when you always know what to expect.

    [​IMG] Booring, man.

    [​IMG] I mean, dragons are those all-powerful creatures, right?

    [​IMG] All powerful, yeah. They can do anything. They just... defy your expectations, man.

    [​IMG] So we gave them more freedom. More tactical moves, you could say.

    [​IMG] The dragon AI, Todd. Tell 'em about the AI.

    [​IMG] The AI is even more advanced, even more radiant now. And that's not all!

    [​IMG] Tell 'em what's next, Todd.

    [​IMG] Teleporting dragons.

    [​IMG] Teleporting dragons, yeah. Just wait for patch 1.3.

    [​IMG] There's no limit to what a dragon can do.

    [​IMG] No limit, yeah.

    [​IMG] Imagine a dragon teleporting right behind your back. Makes the combat more... well...

    [​IMG] ...more visceral, man.

    [​IMG] Yeah. Has that "whoa!" factor.

    [​IMG] The "whoa!" factor, yeah. You're so good at explaining things, Todd.

    [​IMG] Thanks, Pete. You're a bro.

    [​IMG] :bro: [​IMG]
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  4. Crooked Bee Nyadmin Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2014 MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2
    Floor 1, Part 3: Murphy's Ghost

    [​IMG] Psst, Josh. Come over here. Take a look.

    [​IMG] Is this... a map!?

    [​IMG] You're quite perceptive, Josh. It is indeed a map I conjured up.

    [​IMG] What do you mean, "conjured up"?

    [​IMG] Well... I collar-grabbed him.

    [​IMG] "Him"?

    [​IMG] It doesn't matter. You wouldn't understand. To truly understand, you'd need the contrast, not adherence to a single ideal, Josh.

    [​IMG] ........

    [​IMG] All that matters is, I wrestled with him and won.

    [​IMG] I don't understand, but... Teach me to collar-grab, MCA-sensei.

    [​IMG] Sure, Josh. Watch me closely. .... Can you repeat that?

    [​IMG] *makes a devastating collar grabbing move*

    [​IMG] Ahhhaaaargh... Well done, Josh! Yes, well done indeed! You will find that collar grabbing is an excellent way of getting information.

    All right, so MCA "conjured up" a map for us. Let's have a closer look.

    [​IMG]

    The first level is basically a tutorial level, yet it already has a few tricks up its sleeve (which is the best way you can make a tutorial dungeon not boring). The greyed-out tiles are the dark zone we already (kind of) visited earlier. There are also teleporters (the circled numbers, 1 takes you to 1', etc.), one-way doors, and secret doors. You can easily makes those out on the map without my help, I hope. Oh, and we start at (0,0), whereas (0,10) marks the stairs down to level two.

    Oh, and if we make it through the dark zone, we can reach the well-hidden elevator at (10,8)!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Ugh... too many... buttons...

    Being the lead designer on Dragon Age II, Laidlaw can't handle that many buttons. Plus we have the no shortcut policy. So let's just... forget about the elevator for now.

    Let's rather build up our experience and go grab those keys at (13,18) and (13,3).

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Holy shit! Hand me my shotgun, woman!

    [​IMG] We've been surprised! David, do something!

    [​IMG] Necrofantasia!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] :smug:

    [​IMG] W-what are you?

    [​IMG] You could say I'm Yog-Sothoth with Nyarlathotep's penchant for chaos, to put me into perspective.

    [​IMG] ....

    [​IMG] Haha, got you.

    We make our way to (13,18).

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    It was really nice of those pointy-eared pricks to warn us about the demons, I guess. Except their damn inscription is hardly fucking legible!

    [​IMG]

    But hey, a key. That changes everything! The demons? Bah! We have the key!

    [​IMG]

    Now we only need some more exp for MCA the Bishop. Being the most advanced of all the classes we currently have, he's also the slowest one to level up.

    [​IMG]

    The next group of skeletons we encounter even manage to finally hurt us. The bastards.

    They turn out to be Undead Kobolds, by the way.

    [​IMG]

    The Kobold can't withstand Gaider striking from the shadows!

    [​IMG] With progress like that, I'm bound to start going "mwa-ha-ha-ha" at some point!

    [​IMG]

    And the rest of the party can level up now.

    [​IMG]

    Before resting, Sawyer heals Todd, since his spell points will be replenished when he rests anyway.

    [​IMG]

    The party's spellcasters can learn new spells when leveling up (then again, they may not if the dice aren't on their side), which is, of course, crucial for their efficiency.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Sawyer's new spell is Badios, which is the opposite of Dios in that, instead of healing, it deals 1 to 8 points of damage to an enemy.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Are you really *gasp* sleeping, MCA-sensei? Didn't you tell me sleep is weakness?

    [​IMG] ............

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    MCA learns two new spells: Mogref and Dumapic. Mogref lowers the caster's AC by two, whereas Dumapic is an exploration spell: it gives you the location of the party relative to the stairs leading back up to the castle (given as three coordinates: (x,y) plus how many levels below the first floor you currently are).

    [​IMG]

    Laidlaw gets the same spells as MCA, and while his HP increase isn't really great, hey, I'm not complaining.

    Anyway, back to the maze we go. Arriving at (13,4) is a bit tricky. We must first take the secret one-way door at (19,9), then head down the corridor to (5,9) which teleports us straight to 1' at (15,4):

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    The door ahead is, as you can judge from the map, a loop. So fuck that.

    Let's hit the door on the left instead, which brings us to (13,3):

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] A cat chicken?

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Oh.

    [​IMG] Aaaah!

    [​IMG]

    Overcoming his fear, Pete reaches for the key.

    [​IMG] "Fear"? What fear are you talking about, man? I only screamed because that statue is damn cute. Like, aaah! so cute, man!

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    A hooded man? Now that certainly means no trouble of any kind.

    [​IMG]

    Welcome to the first boss fight!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] David?.. I've heard so much about you from your father, David.

    [​IMG] My father? What do you know about my father, Murphy's Ghost?

    [​IMG] David?

    [​IMG] Yes, Murphy?

    [​IMG] I am your father.

    [​IMG] ...

    [​IMG] ...

    [​IMG] ...

    [​IMG] Man, some serious shit goin' on!

    [​IMG] You're my... long lost... father? *sobs*

    [​IMG] Nah, I'm just kidding. Ha ha.

    [​IMG] Freaking hilarious.

    [​IMG] *wipes away the tears* I'm so gonna kill you now, shithead. I'll beat you to a bloody pulp!

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    MCA casts Katino, but unfortunately Murphy's Ghost seems to be immune to sleep in the SNES version. Would've made the battle so much easier, wouldn't it? He also has (relatively) lots of HP, which is why he is this level's boss. He isn't particularly remarkable in any other way though, really, poor sod.

    We also have Sawyer cast Kalki to boost our defense a bit.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Gaider couldn't hide away. :(

    Laidlaw hurls a fireball, but... well, let's say that wasn't exactly the most AWESOME fireball I've seen.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    There was once a tester named Murphy
    Who went to the capital of Turkey
    A most pleasant host
    Turned him 'to a ghost
    In a way that remains very murky

    Ahem. Yeah. Anyway... Good thing the ghost doesn't really hit hard. Yeah.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    [​IMG] YEAHHH! I'm the boss!

    And hey, 741 exp!

    [​IMG]

    Damn, MCA, that still not enough for you?

    [​IMG] .........

    [​IMG]

    Yeah yeah, I get it, only 19 exp needed until the next level.

    [​IMG]

    To leave this area, we have to make our way through the dark zone.

    [​IMG]

    And this should help with MCA's experience problem.

    [​IMG]

    Hell yeah, let's go level up again.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Pete gains some Piety and Vitality (not IQ though).

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Todd now has IQ of 9. :roll: But hey, it's one whole point higher than Pete's!

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Sawyer learns more spells.

    [​IMG]

    The new spells are Porfic, which lowers the Priest's AC by 4, and Matu, which lowers the entire party's AC by 2. Should come in handy.

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Gaider is now 5 hit points healthier!

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    MCA levels up, but no matter how hard I re-tried and re-rolled, he couldn't learn any new spells, so I guess that's the way it should be in his (i.e., a Bishop's) case.

    [​IMG]

    Laidlaw... Eh... No no no...

    [​IMG] [​IMG]

    Much better now.

    [​IMG]

    Laidlaw's new spells are Dilto, which surrounds the enemy group by darkness so they don't see the party and are easier to hit, and Sopic, which causes the caster to become transparent for the duration of combat, lowering his AC by 4.

    [​IMG] I see you're making good progress so far.

    [​IMG] Well, yeah, you could say we are.

    [​IMG] Study the dungeon design carefully so you can put the knowledge to good use in your next RPG.

    [​IMG] The South Park RPG?

    [​IMG] Er... well yeah... I guess... nevermind.

    Now we could build up more levels fighting Murphy's Ghost over and over, of course, but I'm feeling suicidal, so we'll be heading straight to floor two next time!
    octavius, Jaesun and MicoSelva Brofist this.
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  5. Jaedar Cipher Patron

    Jaedar
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    Wait, why did elves pass through the dungeon thing? :M

    Nice update Bee.
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  6. lightbane Liturgist

    lightbane
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    [​IMG]

    :lol: Glorious.
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  7. Peter Augur

    Peter
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    That is obviously a metaphor for the :decline: of RPGs.
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  8. Mrowak Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

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    :salute:

    Gods, I really need to get down to doing next update. You are putting my LP to shame... again :oops:
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  9. Renegen Prophet

    Renegen
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    Wow, talk about a tutorial map, it's quite something. I imagine that the game didn't have an in-game mapping tool, in which case the player could get quite disoriented from those teleporters and dark areas. Remins me of Shin Megami Tensei : Strange Journey and the evil things those dungeons did. Here's a snip:

    [​IMG]

    /shameless promotion
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  10. Ulminati The Dong Whisperer Patron

    Ulminati
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    Something you're trying to tell us, Bee? :M

    Did MCA collar-grab you hard enough to turn you into a him to procure that map?
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  11. Sitra Achara Augur Patron

    Sitra Achara
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    Codex 2014
    Heh. Right on :)
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  12. Black Arcane

    Black
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    Aww, cheap shot.
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  13. lightbane Liturgist

    lightbane
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    Intelligence: I think she was refering to Dark Underlord, MCA collargrabbed him so hard that he coughed up a map.
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  14. Crooked Bee Nyadmin Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2014 MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2
    Thx for the comments, guys!

    I just... couldn't help mentioning it. Sorry. :oops:

    Feel free to shamelessly promote Strange Journey as long as you like! It's a really awesome RPG.

    That was a reference to Jacob wresting with God, actually, and yes, in this case it's probably DU, or maybe not. It is a mystery for now! :)

    Damn elves, the sly bastards are freakin' everywhere!
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  15. spekkio Arcane

    spekkio
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    Made me :lol:.
    But I'm easily amused.

    Great job so far, miss Bee. RK47's position of resident master larper seems endangered.

    :obviously:
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  16. Ulminati The Dong Whisperer Patron

    Ulminati
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    Ah. And here I thought MCA could collar-grab someone so hard they'd grow a set of gonads. I'm not sure whether I'm releived or dissapointed.

    Probably a bit of both

    :mhd:
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  17. Fowyr Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    Fowyr
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    Cat chicken! I forgot all these little wacky things.
    Frankly, I can only remember black ribbon, knife what can turn thief into ninja and final Werdna encounter.
    BTW, great LP, I laughed like mad.
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  18. Crooked Bee Nyadmin Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2014 MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2
    EPIC FAILS
    Episode 1


    Meanwhile, in an alternative reality...

    [​IMG] Hey Pete, you sure you know what you're doing?

    [​IMG] Climbing down to the third floor underleveled as we are... is it really a good idea?

    [​IMG] No worries, man. It's all under control. We'll just take a little p---

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Eek!

    Several minutes later...

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Josh... I know we didn't really get along.

    [​IMG] Hhhhhhh---

    [​IMG] I mean, I didn't even know who you were before we found ourselves in this place together.

    [​IMG] Uuugghhhh... New... Veggaaah--- *pants*

    [​IMG] You mean you're the guy who did New Vegas for us?.. Sorry, Josh. I guess it doesn't matter any more.

    [​IMG] Hhhhhhhhh---

    [​IMG] Josh... *takes Sawyer by the hand* To think we had such a bright future ahead of us. To think we could do a new Fallout game... together.

    [​IMG] Eeeeghhhh... *gasps for breath*

    The screen fades to black

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Pete, look, bunnies!

    [​IMG] Bunnies are cute, man.

    [​IMG] Hey David, what's "vorpal"?

    [​IMG] I only know what the vorpal sword is, Mike. It's the sword that decapitated Jabberwock.

    [​IMG] Yeah. And in D&D, the vorpal blade cuts off opponents' hea--

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Aaahhhh! Bad bunny!

    [​IMG] That's horrible, man!

    The screen fades to black...

    Not pictured: TPK.

    So much for the current content of my EPIC FAILS folder. Will do the real update in a couple of days; goddamn real life, man.
    Jaesun and MicoSelva Brofist this.
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  19. Sceptic Prestigious Gentleman Arcane Patron

    Sceptic
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    This is excellent stuff, even if we're not seeing much of the game. Do carry on! :thumbsup:
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  20. CappenVarra Phantasmist

    CappenVarra
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    No game is complete without a Vorpal Rabbit :)
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  21. spekkio Arcane

    spekkio
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    Well, that was expected.

    :incline:
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  22. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane Patron

    grotsnik
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    So Pete Hines is calling Josh Sawyer a liar because he answered a question honestly about the Gamebryo engine on his Formspring. Is our heroic party falling apart?
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  23. Crooked Bee Nyadmin Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2014 MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2
    Wait, what? Really? I need a link, gimme gimme it!

    You will, o ye of little faith. The real action is only about to begin. It's just that I didn't have much time for updates lately. :(
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  24. ghostdog Prestigious Gentleman Arcane Patron

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