Spelunky - Best Game Ever

[Shaewaroz]

Fuck leaderboards.

 

[Metro]

Fuck newfags.

 

[Multi-headed Cow]

Fuck leaderboards.

Fuck you.

 

[Shaewaroz]

Fuck leaderboards.

Fuck you.

 

[Black]

Fuck leaderboards.

Aww, poor baby didn't make it through the mines and has nothing to show off on the internet??

 

[Wulfstand]

Oh man, this game right here... this game got me hooked like a motherfucker.

For a time I was concerned on upgrading my now almost 6 year old rack, so as to be able to maaaaybe enjoy the new releases, but since I've been playing more or less only indie games like this one, I'm care free right now, my rig'll be able to support me for years to come!

 

[Cosmic Misogynerd]

The remake is actually... fun! o_O

 

[Damned Registrations]

MOTHERFUCKER.

Trying to finish a speedrun. 3rd floor of temple. 4 hp left. Door is 1 screen away. 10 bombs left. Only things in my way are a mummy and a crocman. So I huck a bomb at the mummy.

Crocman telefrags me.

 

[Deakul]

Does the remake change enough to make it worth the somewhat hefty price tag?

 

[Damned Registrations]

Hard to say. There's an extra 1/3'rd of the base game if you're good enough to go for the full win, and about half a dozen random special levels and some new variants (like spider levels in the mines) and some new enemy types in old areas. There's some new items and stuff too but they're not too important, since they're either irrelevant if you can get them or too rare to matter.

 

[Castanova]

I was bored so I downloaded the original free version the other week and I finally just beat it.

It was overall a fun game but I don't think the design lived up to its potential. When I heard it described as roguelike-like and first started playing, I imagined going through the game and accumulating those power-up items, learning about the game's layout, etc., and then executing a skilled no-death run from start to finish to beat it. But I quickly realized that the most efficient way to beat the game was not to become actually good at it but rather to exploit the shortcut guy by repeatedly running each "world," giving X gold to the tunnel guy, dying, rinse and repeat.

Eventually I unlocked the last shortcut and then it was just a matter of figuring out how to beat the final boss. Initially I thought maybe despite having a shortcut to the last world I would need to do a full-game run anyway because it seemed to me that the final boss was very difficult to beat without any items. The boss himself is no threat but he's constantly summoning annoying monsters to attack you. However, while exploring the final world, I decided to kill one of those caster mummies to see what he dropped and lo and behold! He drops the most OP item in the game, an auto-aim insta-kill infinite-ammo infinite-range gun. The very next game I go to the boss and easily win. Zzzzz.

I also think the outcomes of your encounters with enemies, especially in the later levels, are too binary. In the first few levels, there's some attrition. If you make a mistake, you take damage but you can still continue and you can look forward to finding that girl to regain health. From the second world on, you can no longer survive most mistakes and if you do it's still sort of pointless to continue because you've lost so much life. Case in point are those Yetis in the third world and those Bloodseeker-looking (Dota reference) berserker dudes in the fourth world. If you're unlucky enough to not be pixel perfect when you try to stomp on their heads or get past them, they grab you and launch you across the screen, which 95% of the time means instant death. In the third world, being tossed means you fall down into the abyss. In the fourth world, if you get tossed you usually bounce off a wall and immediately get tossed again with no opportunity to break the combo. And what purpose does it serve to make the player sit through a 2-second stun before regaining control of the character? Sure, it makes the game harder but it doesn't make it more interesting. Part of the charm of real roguelikes is that even if you get yourself into big trouble you can sometimes save your ass with luck and skill. In Spelunky, there is no saving yourself once you err.

If Spelunky were designed better, the shortcut guy wouldn't exist and, more importantly, no one would miss him.

 

[Damned Registrations]

Winning doesn't count if you didn't loot the city of gold, scrub.

 

[Black]

Yeah, if you don't start from the mines you have no right to talk.

 

[Unkillable Cat]

Having picked up the HD version of Spelunky, I find myself having those "moments" where everything seems to go right, only to go so wrong not 10 seconds later.

In this case, I start a new game in the mines and immediately see a crate. I whip it open... shotgun! "Game just got easy" I think to myself as I move further on. I drop through an opening onto a platform and find myself at eye level with a spider on the ceiling. Taking into account the ricochet from the shotgun, I unload a faceful of buckshot into the spider. I pause for a moment to relish that triumphant feeling of using superior firepower against a household nuisance, when all of a sudden... something really fast comes flying straight at me, strikes me off the platform where I proceed to fall down to the very bottom of the level, resulting in my death. From start to shotgun to death in 32 seconds.

Turns out that the buckshot from the shotgun had travelled further to trigger an off-screen dart trap, and the dart traps in Spelunky are strong enough to send them flying across the whole level, it seems. Karma still has it in for me.

 

[Damned Registrations]

Arrow traps can only fire ~6 tiles before they fall actually. Though that's still just far enough it can be offscreen and hit you, iirc.

The worst deaths are being telefragged by those cunts in the temple. Absolutely unavoidable sometimes. They spook themselves with an arrow trap or something and ZAP. You're dead.

 

[1eyedking]

Just passing by to report this game sucks ass.

Gameplay and aesthetically-wise.

Also: political correctness and agenda pushing? In my games? You bet!

Don't like rescuing maidens? Feel discriminated due to your unnatural sexual choices? Well, you can rescue a gay guy, or a dog!

:vomit:

 

[1eyedking]

Bonus crap:

Seriously this pony shit is getting out of control.

I don't even

 

[Admiral jimbob]

Really fun game, but I have to confess... I eventually gave up at the temple. I just can't win. I'm sorry, friends I am no true gamer.

 

[Unkillable Cat]

Actually the game gets easier once you reach the temple. Kill a mummy, get its wand and it's easy street from there on. At least, the classic version did. I've only reached the temple once in the HD version.

The HD version also adds four more levels, but only if you reach the City of Gold... which is something I've only been able to pull off once in the classic game. There's a LP on Youtube about something trying to beat the HD game's "true ending", and it took him about 230 videos to pull it off. Talk about a waste of bandwith.

 

[Gragt]

I only started to play it recently and it is pleasantly brutal so far. I just need to get into the flow of things I guess.

 

[DwarvenFood]

Can never get those controls to work properly, and/or I suck at this game.

 

[Damned Registrations]

Actually the game gets easier once you reach the temple. Kill a mummy, get its wand and it's easy street from there on. At least, the classic version did. I've only reached the temple once in the HD version.

The HD version also adds four more levels, but only if you reach the City of Gold... which is something I've only been able to pull off once in the classic game. There's a LP on Youtube about something trying to beat the HD game's "true ending", and it took him about 230 videos to pull it off. Talk about a waste of bandwith.

Temple is generally pretty easy if you've been playing through the whole way, but if you show up naked through the shortcut it's pretty nasty. And generally noobs that can't beat the game are using shortcuts.

 

[sexbad?]

I got bored in the jungle area and didn't come back to it after that. It is quite limited for something that expects you to play the first few levels over and over again to get the hang of it. Also most of the music is annoying.

I would probably like it more if the boy in distress didn't look so much like Pewdpeiepwd

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

Moar liek Spunky, am I rite guise?

 

[Tehdagah]

(...)
Also: political correctness and agenda pushing? In my games? You bet!

(...)

I watched a lot of videos and streamings of Spelunky HD and got myself surprised by the amount of men refusing to choose the girl. Rather, most of them choose the dog.