In Progress The Codexian darwinian struggle against the Temple of Decline (ToEE Co8), MEATSHIELDS INQUIRE WITHIN

[Hellraiser]

So...

Update?

As soon as I deal with the crap that's keeping me busy. Lots of work, busy week.

 

[dextermorgan]

Goddamn photobucket and its bandwidth limits. Anyway, good LP.

 

[Ulminati]

In case you run out of meatshields (unlikely)

Ulminati
Class: Viking Wizardry (PRAISE ODIN!)
Race: Ubermensch
Stat priority: Int>Con>Dex>Wis>Cha>Str
Sex: Gentleman
Specialize Conjuration, forbid necromancy, abjuration
Get spell focus: Conjuration and augment summoning. Spam monsters everywhere.

 

[Hellraiser]

Goddamn photobucket and its bandwidth limits. Anyway, good LP.

Yeah, looks like I will need a 4th account

Ulminati don't be so sure of that

 

[Ulminati]

In that case, make sure I memorize tons of grease, glitterdust, stinking cloud, summon monster III/IV and black tentacles.

Especially stinking cloud. It's an "I win!" button.

 

[Mrowak]

Stinking cloud is horribly broken in ToEE - basically it makes characters sickened even if left the cloud having succeeded prior saving rolls. Avoid using it, unless you are in for cheap victories.

Also, Ulminati, there's no Black Tentackles in ToEE (like we need another broken spell).

 

[Ulminati]

Stinking cloud is working as intended. Nauseated persists 1d4 rounds after leaving the cloud. Main problem is that sometime sthe AI spazzes out and forgets leaving the damn cloud turning it into a turkey shoot.

Black testicles is not broken, not even in its 3.5e incarnation. though very solid. If you want broken look no further than the pre-pathfinder version of glitterdust. Fail one save and yhou're fucked for the duration. At least paizo allows people to save every round.

Still, summon monster III/IV should be more than enough to win most level-appropriate encounters since the AI will gleefully thwack the summons first and waste their damage on things you won't need to heal afterwards.

Playing a conjurer in a pathfinder p&p campaign at the moment and having a blast. Party just hit level 7; I picked up improved familiar and gave my faerie dragon some spare wands. It's like free quickened spell slots!

 

[Mrowak]

Stinking cloud is working as intended. Nauseated persists 1d4 rounds after leaving the cloud. Main problem is that sometime sthe AI spazzes out and forgets leaving the damn cloud turning it into a turkey shoot.

Stinking cloud creates a bank of fog like that created by fog cloud, except that the vapors are nauseating. Living creatures in the cloud become nauseated. This condition lasts as long as the creature is in the cloud and for 1d4+1 rounds after it leaves. (Roll separately for each nauseated character.) Any creature that succeeds on its save but remains in the cloud must continue to save each round on your turn.

Here's the problem - even if you leave the cloud and you are not nauseated (because you made a successful saving throw) the effect of the cloud can nauseate you - basically you have to make saving throws in spite of you not being in the cloud any more. This is why the combat in this update in my LP proved so catastrophic. I discuessed that with Sitra Achara - it's an unavoidable bug in ToEE.

Black testicles is not broken, not even in its 3.5e incarnation. though very solid. If you want broken look no further than the pre-pathfinder version of glitterdust. Fail one save and yhou're fucked for the duration. At least paizo allows people to save every round.

In PnP this spell works all fine, but in both NWN games it appeared in it was pretty much OP. I can't see it not being broken in ToEE.

Still, summon monster III/IV should be more than enough to win most level-appropriate encounters since the AI will gleefully thwack the summons first and waste their damage on things you won't need to heal afterwards.

True to that.

Playing a conjurer in a pathfinder p&p campaign at the moment and having a blast. Party just hit level 7; I picked up improved familiar and gave my faerie dragon some spare wands. It's like free quickened spell slots!

Oh, you one cheeky bastard.

 

[Ulminati]

Someone has to save the rest of the party from getting killed every single encounter. and it sure as hell isn't the witch who thought going all-mind-affecting in a campaign about undead was a good idea. Nor is it going to be the fighter who decided to try his hand at dual-wielding bastard swords or the rogue who has yet to successfully disarm a trap.

Why else would you pick improved familiar but to get something with sorcerer levels, high charisma, your ranks in use magic device and opposable thumbs?

 

[Mrowak]

Someone has to save the rest of the party from getting killed every single encounter. and it sure as hell isn't the witch who thought going all-mind-affecting in a campaign about undead was a good idea. Nor is it going to be the fighter who decided to try his hand at dual-wielding bastard swords or the rogue who has yet to successfully disarm a trap.

That setup sounds suspiciously like our team of dunderheads from your campaign. M:

 

[Ulminati]

Well, they're not THAT inept. But close.

 

[GarfunkeL]

Yeah, Page-5 updates are fucked by Photobucket. Can you fix them or do I need to wait until next month to read it?

Also, volunteering a new meatshield, just in case:

Garfunkel
Human
Male
Fighter
STR>CON>DEX>WIS>INT>CHA
Sword and board style, thank you very much.

 

[Hellraiser]

Yeah, Page-5 updates are fucked by Photobucket. Can you fix them or do I need to wait until next month to read it?

Also, volunteering a new meatshield, just in case:

Garfunkel
Human
Male
Fighter
STR>CON>DEX>WIS>INT>CHA
Sword and board style, thank you very much.

IIRC bandwidth usage is reset every 19th day of the month. So it should work in two days.

Work on the next update is going slow, mostly because every force in the universe has conspired to keep me busy with "important" stuff. I'll write it as soon as I'll find the time.

 

[dextermorgan]

Yay, finally caught up after shitbucket unblocked access. Shame about Hiver and Black Cat, that interaction had potential, especially if Vaarna decided to join the group at some stage. Hiver didn't even get to pms rage once

Anyway, Dexter reporting for duty. I'm partial to short blades, knives if possible (rogue, I suppose). If you want to multi then something to do with medicine (had to learn anatomy in order to slash better) is preferable.

Human, bald.
Chaotic Neutral
Class(es) of your choosing.
Dex>Str>Int>Con>whatever

 

[GarfunkeL]

Yup, good update.

Is there way to host that hot-fix somewhere else? I don't want to register at Co8 forums just for that. Also, @SitraArcha or someone, in my game the Lich never spawned at the Bog. I even returned there later but nothing.

 

[Sukeban Cho]

That is something did not expect from Rolly Polly.

The way she's named, what else could you expect but... a critical hit?



Oh, God. That felt awful.

 

[Hellraiser]

Chapter IV

For whom the bell gnolls

Incoming data packet from Primary Node

Downloading packet…

: A viable specimen has been identified. Sending personality template.

Downloading clevelandmarkblakemore.txt…

: Analyzing personality template. Assigning attributes. Resuming simulation…

Truly an ubermensch stat roll. Considering his stat priority was CON>WIS Cleve barely meets the minimum WIS requirement for a druid

: Greetings inferior beings. I am Cleveland Mark Blakemore, the pinnacle of natural evolution and *the* Golden Retriever trivia expert. You may now proceed to bask in my wisdom and superiority.

: BRO, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

: Ah! I see you have a rather fine specimen of a manboon that is trailing you around. You even taught it how to speak, how cute.

: Herr Blakemore, while zis is indeed a specimen of an untermensch I have been told he is rather useful ja. Vee will need him if zee Reich is to acquire the ultimate occult knowledge.

: IF WE DIDN’T NEED A CLERIC BRO, I WOULD INTRODUCE YOU TO MY BROHAMMER.

: Stop fighting, embrace friendship! The children of the world depend on you! They are our future.

: We have no future. Unless my genius stops them upcoming congoid buttsex apocalypse all will be doomed.

: If that is the case, then we must depart for the evil place!

: I’m nearly naked, can we get some proper gear first?

: Ja, some new gear would be wunderbar meine freunde. Who know vat untermensch and zionists vill attempt to stop our glorious Aryan quest.

After the newest bunch of codexian cannon fodder gets equipped, the party heads out to the moathouse. The journey is uneventful to say the least.

: Reptiles? They are no match for the wit of the fox.

: THE LIZARD GOT WHACKED BROS.

Loot is removed from the lizard’s chest’s inventory.

: Lizards guarding chests. What is the logic behind this. Does not compute.

Initiating anti-logical paradox countermeasures…

Done! Resuming simulation.

: Damn it! That hurts!

: Out of all the fighters in the world ours has to be the biggest pussy. Stop crying and kill it you philistine!

: You just got outfoxed bloodsucker.

After vanquishing the tick of doom and ice cold blood reptile the party heads downstairs.

: Zee undead, I shall study them in detail. The powers that animate them may one day be used to crush the communist and zionist plague.

: BRO, YOU ARE FUCKING CREEPING ME OUT WITH YOUR NAZI SHIT.

: You shall fear the pureblood Aryans, undead untermensch!

Strangelove’s turn undead succeeds in repelling two zombies.

: EWWW! It’s all slimy and gooey!

: Untermensch filth! I shall slay you.



10 points of damage! Strangelove is

Oh ffs BLOBERT

If that zombie could feel pain, it would start crying from the massive damage Random inflicted upon it with that attack

: I have exterminate zee untermensch filth. Clearly it is no match for the Fuhrer’s finest.

: I’ll kill them all!

: They are already dead, but I guess the concept of undeath is alien to such an ignorant savage like you.

Random is dishing out a ton of damage

Running Fox and Strangelove slay another slime.

While BLOBERT keeps missing stuff Random vanquishes more of the undead.

: You shall kneel before your teutonic masters undead schweinhunde!

Once again Random delivers the BLOBERT fails to hit anything. Renegen took a hit but he’s still alive.

: YOU’RE GOING TO GET WHACKED BRO.

BLOBERT murders two zombies in one turn. Too bad he doesn’t have greater cleave.

Finally the last zombie is slain by Random.

The party decides to take a rest at the former spider-chest tower. Random catches filth fever but he’s too much of an ubermensch to let some shitty disease like that incapacitate him.

Upon returning to the zombie chamber the codexians find a few zombies which avoided death for some reason.

They’re easily defeated.

: More undead untermensch!

A secret chamber with Ghouls is discovered. Only three four of them, how hard can it be?

: I.. CAN’T… MOVE…

: Mr. BLOBERT what is wrong?



I forgot the undead faggots can paralyze their enemies! Both BLOBERT and Random are paralyzed.

: I summon forth the grease of friendship!

: The grease of friendship? *sigh*

Well grease helps as two of the ghouls trip. Those assholes have 3 attacks IIRC which combined with their on-hit chance to paralyze makes them a bitch to fight.

Renegen gets one with a magic missile while jimbob gets the other ghoul. Only two are left.

Strangelove smacks one of the remaining ghouls with his teutonic mace for 10 points of damage. The creature never stood a chance

: Time to pay you back for paralyzing me scumbag!

Random murders the last ghoul, the party rejoices.

After looting some valuables left in a pit near where the ghouls were, the party heals at the tower and continues to explore the moathouse.

Gnolls? How hard can it be…

Oh shi…

Party annihilation count: 6 – death by gnolls

: Reloading…

Party annihilation count: 7 – fucking gnolls man

: Watch as the congoid dog-spawn fails to avoid the slippery obstacle. Their ignorance and inferiority dooms them. The neanderthal bloodline shall reign supreme.

This time I use grease to start this fight, it would have been a lot easier if Black Cat was still alive. Sleep would make this fight easy as hell.

: Silly manboon, do you… think… a mere… wound like that… will…

: Hopefully that will shut him up for good. If he would mention something about golden retrievers one more time I would kill him myself.

Cleve’s titanium bones are no match for 17 points of damage.

BLOBERT whacks a gnoll for some decent damage. Outside of Cleve most party members are well. Running Fox and Strangelove got hit but they’re still conscious.

Jimbob casts Tasha’s hideous laughter but the gnoll has more willpower than one might expect.

: My legacy shall… not… be…

: Actually it will be forgotten. When I achieve ultimate god-like power, I will erase any knowledge of Cleveland Mark Blakemore from existence.

RIP Cleve, you were useless and had shitty stats, but you sure did know a lot about cloning cheetahs.

: I… can see… the great Aryan… lebensraum in the sky… it is wunderbar! Mein Fuhrer… I’m…

RIP Strangelove, you were the most awesome of Clerics.

Also BLOBERT got hit for 15 damage



Good thing he has massive constitution.

: Impossible! How… could you… hit me…



Our foxy rogue got seriously injured!

: These fools keep dropping like flies. Don’t they know how hard it is to get new *proper* meat-shields?

RIP Running Fox, your backstabbing ways will be missed.

: Nobody kills my nazi friends and gets away with it gnoll!

: BROS, I WILL POP THESE GNOLLS.

: BROS DON’T CRITICALY HIT BROS… IN COLD BLOOD… BRO…



RIP BLOBERT, you missed way more often than you should but when you hit motherfuckers knew why they shouldn’t mess with you.

: That kind of… hurts…

: Do not die now, you can slaughter it like a cow!

: God your rhymes are awful bard…

RIP Random, for a level 1 fighter you kept bringing in more than BLOBERT

Now I have 2 bards with ranged weapons and one sorcerer against 2 gnolls.

I think Rolly Polly took care of that one gnoll, but combat didn’t end as there was another one around. It is located shortly afterwards.

: But… the rainbows and children… they need my songs…

RIP Rolly Polly in Copacabana, your cheerful days of song and murder have come to an untimely end.

: [maniacal laughter] I’m still alive and more powerful than ever!

Jimbob kills the last gnoll, the remaining two survivors hit level 3. It looks like we have 6 free party slots

Renegen learns sleep because we fucking need it.

Jimbob learns grease.

: Pause simulation. Request input from primary Node.

Simulation paused.

We have 6 empty slots including 2 SPESHUL ones. So vote for 2 SPESHUL codexers to fill in the empty spots. Naturally vote only for those who did were not yet in the prestigious codexian party.

 

[GarfunkeL]

That was brutal. But I get to join the party, yay!

Voting for Andhaira and Liberal, as they will make a great duo.

 

[dextermorgan]

A agree with GarfunkeL. With Andy and Liberal the inanity level should go through the roof.

 

[CappenVarra]

at Cleve's stats.

The grease of friendship really should be a blowjob joke, but I'm not doing your work for you

Btw, when you get to my char, follow these words of wisdom: use illusions instead of armor for protection, furiously smack things with a 2H weapon. The only thing scarier than a raging barbarian is an invisible raging barbarian B-)

Bring in Higher Game and Lyric Suite, that'll show them evildoers... how to be proper villains.

 

[eklektyk]

That was brutal. But I get to join the party, yay!

Voting for Andhaira and Liberal, as they will make a great duo.

did not expect that level of ... well... bloodbath is apropriate I think to describe that last update....

The Next Update<tm> propably will be as much spectacular as this one

 

[Lindblum]

Nice to see updates.

 

[Renegen]

The wait was worth it.

But seriously, this is where the fun starts. How high can the party annihilation counter go? Discuss!

Andhaira and Prosper

 

[Ashery]

Holy shit. It feels more like you're playing X-Com than ToEE.

So all I gotta say is that's some major fucking

 

[Pope Amole II]

That was majestic.

But if almost full party-wipes won't cease, this LP will get nowhere - perhaps now is the time to wander in wilderness, grinding it up a little bit? Or maybe do some Hommlet quests, how can one forget about those...

As for the special characters - we really need some additional ones since now the list got too skimpy to provide some real voting.