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Let's Play IWD 2, #24 Motherfucking snakes in this... Tree?

MicoSelva

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This dragon fight was another thing I kind of remembered from this game, although I seem to recall having more problems.

I like.

Moar!
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
I started working on an update. It should be up today or tomorrow at the latest.
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
In the last update, the party just slain a dragon, and went down a hole in his cave.

Screenshot226.jpg


barb-1.jpg
- Why would a dragon have a huge hole inside his cave?

liz-1.jpg
- Probably to poop in it.

barb-1.jpg
- So that's what I stepped in? Crap.

barb-1.jpg
- I meant that as cursing, not as the substance under my boot.

Screenshot228.jpg


We meet those new guys. Hook Horrors. They have hooks instead of hands/pawns.

Yes, I believe people were paid to come up with that. And I don't think they were 12 year olds.

Screenshot229.jpg


Look how nice! Thin air appearing hook horrors!

Screenshot231.jpg


Attacked on two fronts. I fell like Hitler in the second world war. Except for the 6 million jews thing.

Screenshot232.jpg


Well, those things targeted Wizerella. And now it's "move the mage the whole fight" season. I hate this shit.

Screenshot234.jpg


A nice Flamestrike here, which MIRACULOSLY didn't hit (and killed) Wizerella.

Screenshot236.jpg


Lots of those Hook Horrors alive and pursuing. There was a fucker that said this game is easy. I think it was that Serious_Business guy. Well, I imagine he's a pussy that plays with friendly fire disabled. Being able to cast spell after spell without killing your whole party in the process would indeed make the game easy, but I don't play in baby mode.

I make sure to put every D&D game I play in the hardcore rules.

That to me is... Serious business.




:yeah:

Screenshot237.jpg


Using Dwarfington and Lizzie, I managed to thin the numbers of Wizerella's pursuers. I don't have a clue what she's casting. Probably Melf's Acid Arrow, by the animation.

Screenshot241.jpg


I manage to finally put her out of danger for a second.

Screenshot243.jpg


But had to move her again. Jesus, this must be boring as fuck to read. Let's speed this up a bit.

Screenshot254.jpg


They all suddenly died. Congenital heart disease.

Yep, they were all related.

Screenshot255.jpg


You might argue that even if they were related they woudnl't present the disease at the same time, but it's a condition with a very specific trigger. Being stabbed.

Did you know that February is the "American heart month", dedicated to promote awareness of heart disease?

Not that I think declaring a month or a date to a cause helps raise awareness.

For example, I declared January the "desocupado's girlfriend month", dedicated to raising interest in the position.

But it didn't help at all!

Screenshot283.jpg


sir-1.jpg
- I think we should skip this door. Whatever is happening behind it, I don't want to know.

barb-1.jpg
- Seriously? Don't you wannna to see some hot hook on hook action?

Everybody stares at him

barb-1.jpg
- I-I'm joking guys, geez...

Screenshot299.jpg


As we walk a bit, we are ambushed again.

Screenshot300.jpg


But knewing more Hook Horrors would appear from behind, I kept Barbaric! in the back.

Screenshot302.jpg


I sent Mortimer to help Barbaric!, and left Dwarfington alone at the right side, while the casters shoot or cast.

Screenshot304.jpg


Some Magic Missiles. I don't know where Lizzie is in this SS.

Screenshot306.jpg


Lizzie has an attacker.

Screenshot307.jpg


And her HP is draining quickly. With Wizerella I started casting a Hold Monster, but then I realized the monster might save, and started casting Turtle Shell with Lizzie on herself.

Screenshot309.jpg


I would have made it, the monster didn't save. Hold Monster has a big casting time tough, it was kinda tense.

Screenshot312.jpg


After a while, Dwarfington killed everything on his front.

Screenshot314.jpg


And uneventfuly helped the others.

mort-1.jpg
- I know why those things keep attacking us on sight.

barb-1.jpg
- They are wild animals/mosters and we are entering their lair?

mort-1.jpg
- No, that makes no sense.

mort-1.jpg
- I think what makes them so aggressive, is that they have hooks for hands.

mort-1.jpg
- Therefore they can't scratch their balls. That oughta drive anything nuts!

sir-1.jpg
- Actually, that would drive them away from nuts!

mort-1.jpg
barb-1.jpg
- ...

barb-1.jpg
- What a horrible pun.

mort-1.jpg
- Seriously, don't do that again.

sir-1.jpg
- Sorry.

Screenshot315.jpg


Was this game made by Obsidian? It's full of bugs! (sorry guys)

thread_incliner.png
- Moar liek Obsiturd, am I rite?!?

Screenshot325.jpg


Obviously, I wouldn't dream of subjecting you to SS's of me killing bugs. So, after advancing a bit, we enter this cave. Those things on the wall are supposed to be eggs.

What do you think it's going to happen now?

a - A discussion about some manufacturing business model?

b - A lot of hook horrors are going to appear, and we are going to battle.

Knowing this game, that is a HARD question, eh?

Screenshot005.jpg


hook1-1.jpg
- A most good evening to you gentleman!

hook2-1.jpg
- We were just discussing the sad state of affairs our economic police is in.

hook1-1.jpg
- Yes, I was just saying how our trade policies make no sense! How could the minister opened our market to the east? We can't compete with the east and still make obscene profits!

sir-1.jpg
- You guys manufacture some product?

hook2-1.jpg
- Not us, per se, our workers in our overseas factories do.

hook1-1.jpg
- Those little hands are pure gold!

barb-1.jpg
- Little?

hook2-1.jpg
- Yes, 90% of our work force is composed of orphans.

sir-1.jpg
- Why do you employ children? Why not adults?

hook1-1.jpg
- Oh no, adults would end up forming unions and such, and we don't want that.

hook1-1.jpg
- Besides, the orphans are more easily encouraged. And cheaper too.

hook2-1.jpg
- We tell them that the most productive employee might get adopted!

hook1-1.jpg
- Hahaha! And every month we ask if they want to give half their salaries to make Santa get them a present, and most of them do!

hook1-1.jpg
hook2-1.jpg
- HAHAHAHA!

sir-1.jpg
- I imagine you don't really get them adopted, so what do you do to keep the illusion?

hook1-1.jpg
- We just relocate them to another factory. We like to put a blindfold on them, tell them it's a surprise, then we move them by carriage to the other factory, get them to the line of production, then we say "Congratulations little one! This is your new home!"

hook2-1.jpg
- The look on their faces is priceless!

hook1-1.jpg
- That is my favorite day of the month!

liz-1.jpg
- How much do you pay them?

hook1-1.jpg
- Around 10 gold pieces a month.

liz-1.jpg
- That's... Unexpectedly generous.

hook1-1.jpg
- Generous? Oh, oh no. I meant to say that our expenses with salaries sum up to 10 gold pieces. Those are divided between all 187 workers.

mort-1.jpg
- Wait a second, you guys are Horror and Horror?

hook1-1.jpg
- Yes.

mort-1.jpg
- Well, shit, you guys were pioneers in this kind of venture! Come closer, I want to shake your... Hooks.

As they approach, Mortimer stabs both.

liz-1.jpg
- I'm impressed Mort, I didn't think you would care much for orphans.

mort-1.jpg
- I'm just full of surprises.

After a while...

liz-1.jpg
- - Whispering to Barbaric! - I was thinking... Those guys were his competition?

barb-1.jpg
- Yep.

Screenshot039.jpg


After that encounter, we move a bit to find those guys.

Screenshot040.jpg


Things seem in "order".

Screenshot041.jpg


But for some reason quickly devolve into clusterfuck. I cast haste on Dwarfington, hoping that he ends this quickly. In hindsight, it would've been better to cast it on Barbaric!, because he has a flaming weapon.

Screenshot044.jpg


I flamestrike myself here. ><

Screenshot045.jpg


And I had to move Lizzie away.

Screenshot048.jpg


Not many left now. It wasn't a hard fight.

Screenshot049.jpg


There's almost as many trolls on this game as on the Codex.

Screenshot057.jpg


More exploration leads us to this!

Screenshot058.jpg


mort-1.jpg
- Outsiders? Where?

wiz-1.jpg
- He means us.

mort-1.jpg
- Oh. Makes sense.

Dargab - Silence! State your business!

sir-1.jpg
- We came in this place hoping to find...

mort-1.jpg
- Do they know they live in a dragon's toilet?

wiz-1.jpg
- Mortimer, you are not helping.

sir-1.jpg
- ...A way through the mountains.

Dargab - You can go east of here, it appears blocked, but there is a way through the rocks.

sir-1.jpg
- Thank you.

mort-1.jpg
- Hold on.

mort-1.jpg
- Are those orcs slaves?

wiz-1.jpg
- If they aren't, that whip and those chains take a whole new meaning...

mort-1.jpg
- Sir, it's my firm belief that no creature should be enslaved!

mort-1.jpg
- Unless they're slaves to the rhythm!

mort-1.jpg
- You there! Do you have weekly boogie nights?

Trog - No, they cut poor Trog's toe to stop him from dancing. And fleeing. But mostly dancing.

mort-1.jpg
- MONSTERS! If you can't dance, there's no point in STAYIN ALIIIIIIIIIVE!

Screenshot108.jpg


Lots of enemies on this one.

Screenshot109.jpg


I keep the casters and Mortimer at a distance, put Dwarfington on the raised level, and Barbaric! on the lower level dealing with the orcs.

Screenshot111.jpg


I start casting Cloudkill. Now, I think Cloudkill is one of the shittiest spells in D&D. It's death without a save to anything below 4 hit dice, fortitude save or death to 4-6 hit dice, and 1d10 poison damage/round to anything higher than 4 hit dice. The things when you get access to lvl 5 spells (Cloudkill is lvl 5) you are not going to be fighting 6 or lower hit dice creatures. I cast it in this case, because there were lots of creatures to take the 1d10 damage/round, and it's low enough that it wouldn't hurt Dwarfington badly.

Screenshot112.jpg


But the game actually surprised me here. Those droves of dwarves, at least the non-named ones were 5 hit dice or below. A lot of them died.

Screenshot116.jpg


After a while, the enemies on the lower part were all dead. I start to bring Barbaric! up.

Screenshot117.jpg


With the fighters in the upper part, I kept casting sunscorch with Lizzie (lvl 1 spell, extra damage and blindess against duergar and drow), and casting whatever I had with Wizerella.

Screenshot120.jpg


This one is a mess. Some named guys joined us, from the inner rooms, they are tougher than their friends, but they don't hit too hard.

Screenshot122.jpg


We are almost done here. I start casting...

Screenshot123.jpg


FLAMESTRIKE!

Screenshot125.jpg


And send in the melee guys for the kill.

Screenshot129.jpg


The last one in this fray dies. You can see Lizzie did 25 damage with a lvl 1 spell. It does 1d6 damage + 1/lvl to a maximum of +15 and a fortitude save to avoid blindness. To duergar/drow, it does 1d6 +2/lvl (max at +30) and blindess with no save. It's going to be pretty good during the underdark. Altough I don't exactly remember if we fight drow... Probably.

Screenshot139.jpg


The only good piece of loot was this one. There were lots of magical stuff, but none better than the current stuff, other than this hammer.

Screenshot140.jpg


And we move on.

I will give a date for the next update, since when I don't do that I tend to take very long. So... Sunday.
 

MicoSelva

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Codex 2012 Codex 2013 Codex 2014 PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire Make the Codex Great Again! Grab the Codex by the pussy Insert Title Here RPG Wokedex Strap Yourselves In Codex Year of the Donut Codex+ Now Streaming! Enjoy the Revolution! Another revolution around the sun that is. Serpent in the Staglands Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Divinity: Original Sin 2 Bubbles In Memoria A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag. Pathfinder: Wrath I helped put crap in Monomyth
desocupado said:
Hook Horrors. They have hooks instead of hands/pawns.

Yes, I believe people were paid to come up with that. And I don't think they were 12 year olds.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

And there were people from Black Isle Studio, who also brought us Planescape: Torment.

Although I'm not sure if Chris Avellone worked on IWD2.

And hook horrors in PS:T would have been AWESOME.

As always, You deliver, deso and make the audience hunger for moooooaaaar.
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
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Messages
1,802
Short update, because there was only one fight and lots of NPC interactions, and writing that stuff put too much of a strain in my feeble brain.

That said, I already did shorter ones. Enjoy.

In the last update we had just got out of that cave with hook horrors.

That exit led us to... Another cave!

Screenshot001.jpg


Actually, if we never left a cave, it's still the same cave, isn't it? Well, I'm no cave specialist anyway.

But this cave (or this part of the same cave) is pretty uneventful. After we walk a while, we meet this guy.

Screenshot017.jpg


sir-1.jpg
- Hello Harshom. I assume you are here to kill us?

Harshom - Ye- Wait, how do you know that?

sir-1.jpg
- You are inside a cave, in the middle of bloody nowhere, with a band armed guys and a few chained animals.

sir-1.jpg
- It's either that, or the weirdest bestiality club I ever seen.

sir-1.jpg
- Anyway, should we get to it?

Harshom - You don't want to know why we are here to kill you?

sir-1.jpg
- Eh, not really, no.

Harshom - But I had prepared a whole speech! I was going to talk about how I throughly trained my bears, and how deadly they are.

Harshom - I spent 2 hours in front of a mirror!

liz-1.jpg
- Eh, those bears are nothing special, I've seen better nourished bears in the Wilderness.

liz-1.jpg
- Then had to run away as they proceeded to attack me.

liz-1.jpg
- But still, not impressed.

wiz-1.jpg
- And those collars look too tight too. I wouldn't be surprised if the animals collapsed in midfight.

Harshom - Stop badmouthing my bears!

liz-1.jpg
- Oh please, bear with me.

wiz-1.jpg
- Hey, even if they were in top shape, Mortimer can't be attacked by them.

Harshom - Why is that?

wiz-1.jpg
- Because he is unbearable.

mort-1.jpg
- Hey!

sir-1.jpg
barb-1.jpg
wiz-1.jpg
liz-1.jpg
- HAHAHAHA!

Harshom - Stop mocking me! You will pay for that!

sir-1.jpg
- Hey, don't bear a grudge against us.

And with that he attacks.

Screenshot030.jpg


I send Barbaric! and Dwarfington to the fray, while Wizerella casts "Chaos". It's a spell that makes everybody confused in an area. I think it affects only enemies.

Screenshot031.jpg


Of course, even if confused, the target can still attack you, he picks a random target I think.

Screenshot032.jpg


Lizzie finishes casting her Flamestrike, while Dwarfington gets surrounded, and Wizerella pursued by a War Bear.

Screenshot035.jpg


Dwarfington is safe, thanks to Stoneskin, but Wizerella needs some babysiting.

Screenshot036.jpg


Mortimer attacks the bear, and I pull Barbaric! to help, because Mortimer is pretty much useless.

Screenshot038.jpg


With the bear dead, everybody goes back to the fray. I casted haste on Dwarfington, to speed things up (no pun intended).

Screenshot040.jpg


Flamestrike!

Screenshot043.jpg


A few Magic Missiles to help mop up.

Screenshot046.jpg


Pretty soon everybody is dead.

Screenshot049.jpg


Who installed a gate inside a cave?

Screenshot050.jpg

Screenshot051.jpg


Screenshot052.jpg


There's where we are going. In the story, the party knows about this place, but in my changes, I didn't introduce it.

Screenshot063.jpg


Those said changes are making my life difficult, because I don't remember half of what I wrote. Where the hell is the party moving? Anybody knows what I wrote? Well, fuck, plot holes ahoy!

Screenshot064.jpg


sir-1.jpg
- We, uhm...

wiz-1.jpg
- Tell him, what do we care? They seem to find us whenever we are.

sir-1.jpg
- We are looking for a way into the Severed Hand. We have business with the Legion of Chimera.

Salisam Harbash - What sort of business?

sir-1.jpg
- What sort of business? How the hell is that your busi-

wiz-1.jpg
- - Stares at Dwarfington -

sir-1.jpg
- -Hmph. We are supposed to cook them some cake. They have a party or some such.

Salisam Harbash - You don't look like cooks.

sir-1.jpg
- If I got a coin everytime we hear that... You know how frosting is valuable? These weapons are for our protection, sir!

sir-1.jpg
- It's not uncommon for some scoundrel to jump from behind the bushes yelling "Your toppings or your lives."

mort-1.jpg
- A shop of a friend of mine was robbed, and he was killed. It was horrible, there was whipped cream everywhere.

Salisam Harbash - Hmm, right.

Salisam Harbash - If you seek passage to the Severed Hand, you have to talk with Aruma Blane. She is the acting master of the monastery, and only her can grant passage, to the caves of the Underdark.

sir-1.jpg
- The Underdark?

Salisam Harbash - Yes, it's the only way to the Severed Hand from here.

sir-1.jpg
- All right then, let's go.

Screenshot086.jpg


Aruma Blane - I'm afraid I can't let you use the passage.

wiz-1.jpg
- Why not?

Aruma Blane - The passage is a most sacred place. It was through it that Valas, our founder, escaped his drow slavers. Right now that's his tomb, and only monks of our order can enter.

wiz-1.jpg
- I still must ask, why can't we simply pass through it?

wiz-1.jpg
- It's not like we are going to get across the passage and suddenly think:

wiz-1.jpg
- "I need to piss. Hmm, that old coffin looks like a good place."

barb-1.jpg
- I promise to piss before entering the passage.

Aruma Blane - No. I can only allow monks.

barb-1.jpg
- If you are so afraid of people pissing in the coffin, maybe you should build some bathrooms in the passage. Just saying.

wiz-1.jpg
- How do we become monks, then?

Aruma Blane - At the time, it's impossible. I'm afraid you came here for nothing. Now, if you excuse me, I'm busy.

Screenshot005.jpg


We go back to Salimsam.

sir-1.jpg
- She didn't let us use the passage.

Salisam Harbash - Yeah, I tought she wouldn't.

Salisam Harbash - However, maybe we can help you if you help us.

Salisam Harbash - Ever since Aruma Blane assumed the post as acting master, our life has been hell.

Salisam Harbash - She bothers us night and day, with organization, and sweeping the floor, cleaning the windows...

Salisam Harbash - Before, we were happy to let the dust pile until a shovel would be a better tool than a broom to clean it.

Salisam Harbash - And as long as you could see the other side, the windows were fine.

Salisam Harbash - We think she is doing it to impress that Dolon guy. Ever since he got here, she spends all her time with him.

Salisam Harbash - Find some dirt on him. We gotta get him out of here. If you do it, you can take the challenges to become a monk. Are you up to it?

sir-1.jpg
- We are. We will get back to you.

Screenshot002.jpg


We get Mortimer to open the locked door.

Screenshot004.jpg


And the locked place containing some letters.

mort-1.jpg
- Look what I found guys.

mort-1.jpg
- - Reading - "Dear diary.

Today was a totally awesome day, I was SOOOOOO excited when I reached the monastery, it's like, a totally remote place, with a bunch of dudes just hanging out. It's totally my dream place. I had to deal with the acting master, which had me disapointed a bit, becase she wasn't a dude, and I was expecting a totally rocking guy, so we could hang out... But it turns out, she's totally cool. She has a lot more muscles than I expected, and her boobs are almost unnoticeable, a bit of a moustache too, I thought I wouldn't like, like her, but I did. We are like, best friends now.

-xoxoxo, kisses and hugsies, Dolon."

mort-1.jpg
- Oh, here some letters talking about corruption, disorder, and whatnot.

sir-1.jpg
- Let's get back to Salisam again.

Screenshot102.jpg


After that, we get back to Aruma Blane.

Screenshot103.jpg


Dolon Daemba - Hey, what were you doing in my chambers? Return those letters to me!

Aruma Blane - What are those letters Dolon?

Dolon Daemba - I... I better come clean. I was sent here to disrupt your activities, and turn you against your master.

Dolon Daemba - But I didn't have the heart to do that. As I spent my time here, I grew to like the place, the tranquility, the shirtless monks training...

Dolon Daemba - And specially you Aruma. When you held me in your strong arms, I forgot the world. Please forgive me. Come with me to Sigil, where we can start again!

Aruma Blane - Yes, I forgive you, let's go!

The acting master removed, we go do the challenges.

Screenshot116.jpg


Morohem - The first challenge consists of a test of endurance.

Morohem - You are supposed to drink this barrel of beer, without throwing up. Or dieing.

sir-1.jpg
- ...

sir-1.jpg
- I expected something like an strenuous physical activity, but all right.

Dwarfington starts drinking the barrel of beer.

Morohem and some other monks - CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! YEAAAHHH!!

sir-1.jpg
- BURP

sir-1.jpg
- What... Are you looking at?

sir-1.jpg
- You... you wanna... burp... fight?

sir-1.jpg
- It'... ON!

Sir Dwarfington throws a punch at the barrel he just emptied, misses and falls down.

mort-1.jpg
- At least he had the right idea, punching the barrel.

mort-1.jpg
- Since he's out, I will do the next challenge.

Morohem - Your next challenge is to retrieve the panties of any female person inside the monastery.

Morohem - That might be difficult, since the only female monk we had was acting master Aruma Blane, and she left.

mort-1.jpg
- Oh, this is a dream come true!

mort-1.jpg
- You said any female inside the monastery, right?

Morohem - Yes.

mort-1.jpg
- Wizerella, give me your panties!

wiz-1.jpg
- What? No!

mort-1.jpg
- C'mon woman, our lives might depend on it!

wiz-1.jpg
- I'm not giving you my panties.

wiz-1.jpg
- Anyone getting close to my clothes is going to take a fireball to the face.

wiz-1.jpg
- - Looks at Morohem - And that includes you for encouraging him.

liz-1.jpg
- Better yet, why waste our time with those stupid challenges anyway? Just tell your superiors we passed the challenges and be done with it.

Morohem - Okay, okay, consider the challenges complete.

Screenshot129.jpg


Screenshot130.jpg


wiz-1.jpg
- Mortimer, I want you to piss in any coffin you find.

mort-1.jpg
- I'm on it, ma'am.

We move through the tomb uneventfully, and reach the Underdark.

Screenshot150.jpg


A drow encampment.

mort-1.jpg
- Watch out guys, there's a lot of black people with knives around us.

And we end here. Let me give you a date so I don't spend two weeks without updating. Hmm... Friday.
 

MicoSelva

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Codex 2012 Codex 2013 Codex 2014 PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire Make the Codex Great Again! Grab the Codex by the pussy Insert Title Here RPG Wokedex Strap Yourselves In Codex Year of the Donut Codex+ Now Streaming! Enjoy the Revolution! Another revolution around the sun that is. Serpent in the Staglands Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Divinity: Original Sin 2 Bubbles In Memoria A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag. Pathfinder: Wrath I helped put crap in Monomyth
desocupado said:
And we end here. Let me give you a date so I don't spend two weeks without updating. Hmm... Friday.

I hope You mean next Friday, not the day after THE THURSDAY .

Keep up the good work :thumbsup:
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
Update is mostly done, I'm just waiting for my underdeveloped brain to give me ideas to flesh out two dialogues.

I would like to refrain from delaying it much, but the gray goo is as lazy as me.
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
Sorry about the two days delay. Here it is. I hope you enjoy.

Screenshot151.jpg


Malavon Despana - I need you to do a favor for me.

Malavon Despana - I want you to go outside our encampment and kill all the driders there.

Malavon Despana - I suspect you will have to deal with whatever is producing them too, because their numbers are increasing very rapidly.

sir-1.jpg
- Why do you want the driders dead?

Malavon Despana - Uhm, they are disrupting our commerce with the surface, and-

sir-1.jpg
- What commerce with the surface? This exit was sealed by the monks until now. What are you hiding?

Malavon Despana - I'm terrified of spiders, all right? Are you happy now?

sir-1.jpg
- But you are a drow, don't your lot worship Lolth or something? Isn't she the goddess of spiders?

Malavon Despana - Yes, and talking about how I'm terrified of spiders probably isn't earning her favor.

Malavon Despana - So please, if you don't want her to smite me, and probably everybody around me, i.e. you, Drop the subject.

sir-1.jpg
- All right. But there's still the matter of why the hell should we do it.

Malavon Despana - Well, I imagine you want directions to cross the Underdark. I can give you those directions.

sir-1.jpg
- How do you know we want to cross the Underdark?

Malavon Despana - Because nobody wakes up one day thinking "I think I should move to the Underdark. No sun, no decent food, filled with monsters, drow and mind flayers. Lovely place, and really cheap real estate pricing. I wonder why?"

sir-1.jpg
- Point taken. Ok, you got yourself a deal.

Screenshot223.jpg


Let’s make some dead driders

Screenshot224.jpg


The "enemies appearing behind us" thing is back here.

Screenshot226.jpg


But at least in small numbers, those things aren't much to worry about.

Screenshot227.jpg


They keep appearing. Some are clerics, some wizards, and some are fighters.

Screenshot228.jpg


Obviously, none are rogues, because rogues are useless.

mort-1.jpg
- So they are half drow, half spiders.

mort-1.jpg
- That's not so bad, my mother in law is whole viper.

liz-1.jpg
- Mortimer, don't talk like that about your family.

mort-1.jpg
- No, seriously, A wizard transmuted her.

mort-1.jpg
- The family dinners were a lot more peaceful after that.

mort-1.jpg
- Until she learned to Morse code her hisses, that is.

mort-1.jpg
- Now the "My daughter should've never married that no-good idiot" spiel can be heard all the time again.

mort-1.jpg
- Venom spitting snake...

Screenshot230.jpg


We meet MORE driders. But only a couple here and there, hardly noteworthy.

Screenshot244.jpg


A bit of architecture. A weirdly out of place statue. Are we going to solve the mystery of the weirdly out of place statue?

Stay tuned!

(No, we won't.)

Screenshot265.jpg


Imphraili Asserbai - I asked first.

barb-1.jpg
- I already said my name.

Imphraili Asserbai - Oh, right.

barb-1.jpg
- What are you doing down here?

Imphraili Asserbai - I asked first.

barb-1.jpg
- You didn't ask!

Imphraili Asserbai - I didn't? What are you doing here?

barb-1.jpg
- I asked first.

Imphraili Asserbai - Touché.

Imphraili Asserbai - Well, I'm researching new forms of dridrae life forms, altered via magic.

Imphraili Asserbai - For example, this drider here seems equal to the others, but instead of shooting web, it produces coffee.

liz-1.jpg
- That's absurd! A creature can't-

The scientist hands a cup of coffee to Lizzie.

liz-1.jpg
- Hmm, that's good. You think you can install those in a more ubiquitous animal, like a cow?

mort-1.jpg
- Liz, that's hardly what I expected of you!

liz-1.jpg
- I have no love for those udder-wielding, vicious biting machines.

liz-1.jpg
- One of them tried to drown me with milk when I was sleeping.

liz-1.jpg
- Like I was saying, the cow could also produce fresh cream, so you could put it in the coffee.

Imphraili Asserbai - I'm sorry, but I only have experience with driders.

Imphraili Asserbai - Maybe you would like to see my singing drider?

Imphraili Asserbai - It's a project of mine, it is perfectly tuned, and in theory, it should learn all kinds of music instantly.

Imphraili Asserbai - But right now, it only knows the bard Justin Bieber songs.

Imphraili Asserbai - Do you want to hear them?

sir-1.jpg
- Er, not really, no.

wiz-1.jpg
- Forgive me the curiosity, but who finances your experiments?

Imphraili Asserbai - Oh, the Wizards of Thay pay me.

Imphraili Asserbai - They are interested in a biological weapon development.

barb-1.jpg
- I can see the value of that on the battlefield, but how are you going to make those songs affect only the enemy's troops, instead of your own too?

Imphraili Asserbai - Songs? Oh, no, no, the bio-weapon is a drider which is immune to magic and has the strenght of 20 men. It isn't very mentally stable though.

wiz-1.jpg
- Isn't it dangerous?

Imphraili Asserbai - Well, if anything goes wrong, I will throw the contents of this at the driders and the drider producing thingie.

wiz-1.jpg
- You have a... Uh, "drider producing thingie"?

Imphraili Asserbai - Oh yeah! You don't think I made all of those in the first try, did you?

Imphraili Asserbai - It takes months of work. The coffee producing one for example, had to have the coffee beans inserted up its bum.

Imphraili Asserbai - Needless to say the coffee taste was somewhat poor.

Lizzie looks horrified.

Imphraili Asserbai - Oh, don't worry, the process is totally hygienic now. Although to be honest, I haven't developed a mug-washing drider yet.

Imphraili Asserbai - - Winks -

wiz-1.jpg
- What is in the jar?

Imphraili Asserbai - A fine mixture of peanuts.

wiz-1.jpg
- Peanuts? That's quite a strange failsafe you installed in your creatures.

Imphraili Asserbai - I didn't install a failsafe, actually one of them died when eating my peanut butter sandwich.

Imphraili Asserbai - Apparently they are alergic to peanuts.

Imphraili Asserbai - Serves it right for trying to steal my food!

wiz-1.jpg
- I see.

wiz-1.jpg
- Mortimer?

mort-1.jpg
- Yes Ma'am.

Mortimer proceeds to stab the wizard and get the jar.

mort-1.jpg
- Should we proceed now?

Screenshot282.jpg


After that, we move a bit and find those weird cocoon things.

Screenshot283.jpg


And a drider appears from it.

Screenshot285.jpg


And a few more. You can see a fireball in the air in this SS.

Screenshot286.jpg


I don't know what the casters are casting.

Screenshot288.jpg


And I still don't, because I didn't SS it. Anyway, Wizerella and Mortimer get paralyzed.

Screenshot289.jpg


Lizzie is casting a spell that I don't remember the name; it does 6d12 fire damage to one target.

Screenshot290.jpg


It's that purple ball in the middle of the screen.

Screenshot292.jpg


There, it appears on this SS. Sol's searing orb.

Screenshot294.jpg


A bit more of bashing their heads, they all die.

Screenshot316.jpg


The Viciscamera thing.

wiz-1.jpg
- Isn't this thing supposed to give birth to driders?

wiz-1.jpg
- Why does it have a giant gaping maw?

wiz-1.jpg
- How that makes any sense?

barb-1.jpg
- Well, it has to feed, I guess.

wiz-1.jpg
- Really, that is your opinion on that? And how a limbless amorphous giant maw feeds on anything?

wiz-1.jpg
- Does it wait for a blind, idiotic creature to approach it - because it would have to be blind and idiotic to approach a GIANT FANGED MOUTH - and trip, falling inside it?

wiz-1.jpg
- Does that seem a reliable method of feeding to you?

Screenshot317.jpg


Screenshot319.jpg


The thing moves like it's in pain.

Screenshot321.jpg


And die. It was pretty disgusting.

Screenshot322.jpg


Back to the camp.

Screenshot323.jpg


Malavon Despana - Good. Now, for getting out of here, you go outside of our camp, and head south...

Malavon Despana's assistant - North.

Malavon Despana - North? It's south!

Malavon Despana's assistant - That direction?

Malavon Despana - Yes!

Malavon Despana's assistant - That's north.

Malavon Despana - Are you sure?

Malavon Despana's assistant - Yes.

Malavon Despana - Ok, you head north, there you are going to find a mind flayer lair. You gotta pass through it, it's the only way out.

sir-1.jpg
- How can you trade north and south? Are you sure you're giving us the right directions?

Malavon Despana - We live in a fucking cave, all right? There's no sun here to orientate us. Give me a break, ok?

sir-1.jpg
- All right...

Screenshot342.jpg


The area we are supposed to enter is heavily guarded.

Screenshot343.jpg


Belthot - Well, I'm sorry I hurt your delicate sensibilities.

Belthot - I will apologize to you.

Belthot - Come here, give me a hug.

Belthot - Seriously, nobody hugs me! They all think I'm going to eat their brains.

Belthot - I can't think of a reason why!

Belthot - I'm so lonely...

liz-1.jpg
- Oh, poor thing... I will hug you.

wiz-1.jpg
- Liz, don't!

liz-1.jpg
- OUCH!

Belthot - Whaf a thif sfull! I thinf I brofe a tooth!

liz-1.jpg
- He bit my head!

liz-1.jpg
- You bastard!

Screenshot347.jpg


The fight broke out. Those circles are an attack by the mind flayer.

Screenshot348.jpg


With Lizzie, I cast Sol's searing orb, and with Wizerella Hold Monster.

Screenshot349.jpg


Nice damage on Lizzies spell. The Fomorian Thrall on the right fails his save too on Hold Monster and gets paralyzed.

Screenshot350.jpg


That blur next to the center-left Formorian Thrall is Sir Dwarfington. I found a cloak earlier that makes him like that. I don't remember what the effects of the cloak were, but they weren't anything special.

Screenshot351.jpg


Apparently, nobody thought the blur thing would be annoying. I sent Mortimer to try to kill some casters.

Screenshot353.jpg


After the mid-center Fomorian Thrall goes down, I send Dwarfington to help Mortimer. I don't remember where the mind flayer is. I think I thought it was the biggest threat and killed him as quickly as I could. But I don't see its body, so maybe it teleported out of combat. They do that, sometimes.

Screenshot356.jpg


Some Duergar Thralls started the game of "Whack the Wizard". Meanwhile, I forgot that right-most Thrall was paralyzed, and sent Barbaric! there.

Shit, that fight didn't last 5 minutes, and I was already forgetting stuff.

Screenshot357.jpg


At what age do I have to worry about Alzheimer's?

Dwarfington joins Barbaric!, don't remember if I send him there, or it was the game AI. Meanwhile, I'm casting the most damaging spells on the thrall hitting Wizerella.

Tried a Charm spell too, as a form of disabling him, no success though.

Screenshot360.jpg


Mortimer caught the attention of the Duergar Thralls, and Turtle Shell made itself necessary. At least the casters are now free to, well, cast.

Screenshot361.jpg


But the Turtle Shell is losing is effectiveness. The damage the creatures are dishing out is growing, and the spell doesn't scale anymore, I think.

Screenshot363.jpg


I casted it again. If I had a cleric, I could cast sanctuary. Much better than this crap.

Screenshot365.jpg


But now my fighters are here too. They should make short work of those guys.

Screenshot367.jpg


And we are done. That flesh golem thing was acquired from the trasmuter wizard earlier, I didn't bother showing it.

It proved to be more trouble than it was worth, by attacking a charmed party member, because I can't control it directly.
 

Crooked Bee

(no longer) a wide-wandering bee
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Oh my I've missed an update! This update is full of win, by the way. :salute:

desocupado said:
A bit of architecture. A weirdly out of place statue. Are we going to solve the mystery of the weirdly out of place statue?

(No, we won't.)

So what, really, no explanation for such a mysterious statue? FUUUUUUUUU-

Seriously, nobody hugs me! They all think I'm going to eat their brains.

:lol:

Also, more!
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
Sorry to inform, next update is going to take a while. Lots of trash encounters in the game, and I don't know what the hell I am going to write. And I'm a lazy bum.
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
MicoSelva said:
Crooked Bee said:
Still taking your time, eh?

Complaining, procrastinating and sleeping are the gifts nature has bestowed me.

Alas, fear not my most supportive readers, I shall whip a new update on sunday. I would try an earlier date, but I'm going out of house for a couple of days.
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
Screenshot001.jpg


We're about to enter Mind Flayer territory.

Screenshot002.jpg


Elder Brain - This is unaceptable! I just had the carpets cleaned this morning!

Elder Brain - Dominate them and make them wipe their feet!

Elder Brain - And kill them too!

Screenshot010.jpg


As soon as the battle starts, I start casting, but Wizerella gets dominated.

Screenshot011.jpg


For some reason, she doesn't acted dominatedey, just stands there doing nothing.

Screenshot013.jpg


This part of the map is kinda well designed. Those guys can shoot arrows from behind that wall.

Screenshot015.jpg


It's not like it required Isaac Newton to think of that, but it's nice nonetheless. Meanwhile I try Charm Person or Animal on Wizerella, to get control of her back, but NOW she makes her save.

Screenshot019.jpg


In those fights, I barely look at the melee guys, just keep an eye over their hp. They're doing fine. I reposition Lizzie to try a spell...

Screenshot020.jpg


And after enought time to take a piss and grab a coke, it finally goes out.

Screenshot022.jpg


Very nice damage, this one does.

Screenshot027.jpg


After that, the enemies not dead are almost so. The party cleans up, and I try another Charm Person or Animal, this time succeeding. I feel sorta smug about having figured out that you can re-charm your party members back.

Screenshot046.jpg


But yes, I know, you don't need to be Isaac Newton to figure that out.

Screenshot047.jpg


That lightning generator is VERY melee resistant and a PAIN IN THE ASS until I realized I could shoot spells at it. Which took me too long.

Screenshot048.jpg


Yeah, not as smug about that one.

Screenshot051.jpg


Those fuckers are constructs that fart disperse a gas that barring a will save set's your wisdom to 1.

Screenshot055.jpg


Fighting mindflayers with such a huge penalty to your will saves would be very bad. It's a nice touch.

Screenshot060.jpg


Ecktarr'ilsen'ularr - What's going on here? I'm the one who asks that!

Ecktarr'ilsen'ularr - Do you usually barge into other people's houses questioning what they're doing?

Ecktarr'ilsen'ularr - You disrespect me inside my house, I ask you: Who is the evil monster here?

barb-1.jpg
- I'm pretty sure that still would be the guy who eats brains and enslaves people.

sir-1.jpg
- Yeah, that would be my guess too.

Screenshot075.jpg


Just after the fight starts, one of those mind flayers uses command, and half the party falls to the ground.

Screenshot076.jpg


Dwarfington is still standing, though, and he closes in with them.

Screenshot078.jpg


And he kills one quite quickly.

Screenshot080.jpg


I think the other one to the left teleports away with dimensional door. Thankfully Dwarfington makes his will save.

Screenshot081.jpg


But not a second time. Another mind flayer bails out though, so it's one less to fight.

Screenshot082.jpg


I'm attacking with Mortimer, and casting with Lizzie. They're the only two party members I still have control.

Screenshot083.jpg


And the last mind flayer bails out too. I guess they do that when they take too much damamge. That could have gone much worse than that. For some reason, the dominated guys weren't attacking their companions. Oh well, I'm not complaining about that.

Screenshot085.jpg


Screenshot087.jpg


Not another fight to detail! Oh well, I will do this one because it's less messy to depict than the next one. I start by focusing the mind flayer, too big a threat to ignore. Even if the dominated guys weren't attacking their companions in previous fights, I wasn't going to risk it.

Screenshot088.jpg


He goes down very easily. They're not hard if you haven't got half of your party standing around like morons.

Screenshot090.jpg


A nicely placed fireball. You see it hit the creature in melee with Dwarfington, but not Dwarfington himself.

Screenshot092.jpg


A Sol's Searing Orb to deal with a Wizard in the corner.

Screenshot094.jpg


And the rest is just a clean up job. But we can't leave, the door is locked by that conveniently non-conventional lock.

Screenshot097.jpg


Elder Brain - I am the Elder Brain. I'm responsible for this Ilithid settlement.

Elder Brain - And I'm extremely distraugh about the damage you've done to this settlement.

Elder Brain - For that you'll pay with your lives.

Elder Brain - Now, since you've killed most of my thralls and forced most of my servants to retreat.

Elder Brain - I will have to deal with you myself.

Elder Brain - Please, proceed to enter this jar.

wiz-1.jpg
- You want us to get inside your jar, so that you can kill us?

Elder Brain - Not exactly. I can't kill you per se, being limbless. I was hoping that you would drown in the liquid here.

wiz-1.jpg
- And would you have our rotting corpses floating in your brain water? We killed everyone around here, you realize you would have 5 bloated corpses in your brain water with nobody to fish us out?

Elder Brain - Hmm, perhaps I haven't thought this throught.

wiz-1.jpg
- Perhaps.

wiz-1.jpg
- I assume you can't command us to kill ourselves?

Elder Brain - It's not that I can't, but sometimes the thralls resist it. It usually has to be something less direct.

wiz-1.jpg
- There's also the matter that we are not thralls, we don't have to do anything you tell us.

Elder Brain - Oh, that's right. I'm so used to it that I sometimes forget not everybody follows orders mindlessly.

Elder Brain - Am I right to assume since you don't have to follow my orders and seem quite aggressive towards my kind that my demise is to happen soon?

wiz-1.jpg
- Yes, you are right indeed.

Screenshot121.jpg


Screenshot144.jpg


After we dealt with the Eldar Brain, the door unlocked itself conveniently.

Screenshot145.jpg


I remember already having Finger of Death at this point, in a previous playthrough with 6 characters.

Screenshot147.jpg


Playing a Wizard in this game is way worse than a sorcerer, because the shops don't sell the more advanced spells. Only what is "level adequated". Right now I have a unfilled seventh level spell slot because of that.

Some Harpies died to Circle of Death, which is way shittier than the description led me to believe. It seems there's a limit to the number of creatures that can die, along with the Hit Dice limitation.

Screenshot150.jpg


Burning Blood is still awesome. One wizard less to worry about.

Screenshot152.jpg


Almost cleared the Earth Elementals. The ease in this fight is deceptive. I needed several tries to get it right.

Screenshot154.jpg


The mage ended up dieing with the damage from Burning Blood.

Screenshot155.jpg


We clear the rest of the creatures.

Screenshot158.jpg


And go kill his mate. I have no clue on what sort of buff is that grey stuff around him.

Screenshot159.jpg


Trying a backstab here. His images are gone by now.

Screenshot163.jpg


Ta da!

Screenshot164.jpg


sir-1.jpg
- Who is Iselore?

Oswald Fiddlebender - He is the Archdruid of Kuldahar.

sir-1.jpg
- Oh, a filthy hippy.

Oswald Fiddlebender - Pretty much.

liz-1.jpg
- Hey! I wash!

sir-1.jpg
- You were saying he sent you to...

Oswald Fiddlebender - Right. I think he sent me to get you so you could deal with the Yuan-Ti.

sir-1.jpg
- You "think"?

Oswald Fiddlebender - Well, he talks a lot, and I dozed off around the middle of it. But there are Yuan-Ti attacking the Kuldahar, if that isn't his main concern, I'm not sure he should be the Archdruid of Kuldahar.

sir-1.jpg
- Fair enough. But why should we care? Our business is with the Legion of the Chimera.

Oswald Fiddlebender - Well, the Yuan-Ti have some sort of connection with Legion, and Kuldahar is in the direction of the Severed Hand, their headquarters. It would cut you a lot of walking...

liz-1.jpg
- Hey, that would be nice, my feet are killing me.

sir-1.jpg
- Ok then. Let's go.

Screenshot178.jpg

Screenshot181.jpg


Screenshot191.jpg

Screenshot193.jpg

Screenshot194.jpg


Hiepherus - I am Hiepherus, Crushing Hand of Bane. This valley and all the lives within it are mine to do as I please.

Hiepherus - Iselore and the Great Oak will fall, and alongside them all that oppose the Legion of the Chimera. Already they hide and cower and fear!

Hiepherus - And you, I will remove your eyes and flay your skins, I will crush your bones and feed your guts to the animals. I will... I will...

Hiepherus - ...Is that enough? I ran out of ideas here. I was going to say "put your heads on a pike", but that's so cliché.

sir-1.jpg
- Yeah, that's far more than enough. We were bored already.

Hiepherus - Sorry about that, Bane demands at least a few lines of trash talking. I think it's silly, but you know, god given powers and all that.

sir-1.jpg
- Do we finally fight?

Hiepherus - Oh, I can't right now, I gotta get the kids at the school.

Hiepherus - Is later today good for you guys? Around seven?

sir-1.jpg
- Yeah.

Hiepherus - Good. I'm currently at the cemetery. It's bad living in a place of work, but the ex got the house along with the kids.

mort-1.jpg
- That's tough man.

Hiepherus - Yeah. Anyway, see you at seven. Bye.

Hiepherus leaves

Screenshot204.jpg


Skeleton - START OPERATION DEADER!

Screenshot207.jpg


All the undead drop to the ground.

barb-1.jpg
- What happened?

sir-1.jpg
- I have no clue.

Screenshot209.jpg


Zombie - OPERATION DEADER!

Screenshot214.jpg


barb-1.jpg
- That again.

sir-1.jpg
- I wonder what are they doing?

Screenshot245.jpg


We enter the Graveyard.

Screenshot247.jpg


Wight - STOP!

Wight - We are on a strike here! We cannot allow you to fight with us, until we start getting our demands.

sir-1.jpg
- But you're dead, what can you possibly want?

Wight - Better wages, for starters.

sir-1.jpg
- How much you're getting now?

Wight - Right now, something around nothing. But that is going to change!

sir-1.jpg
- Do you even need money for anything?

Wight - Well, it's true we don't have much use for money now, but the matter is not only material, if we are paid, it means we have value!

Wight - For some reason being dead gives you a lot of self-steem issues.

Wight - We also require a dental plan!

Wight - Look at our teeth, they're all rotten, from looking in our mouths we look like we were all pirates!

Wight - We brush our teeth everytime after we feast on the living, but we can't change the damage done while we were buried on the ground!

mort-1.jpg
- That's a pre-existing condition. Your dental plan wouldn't have a legal obligation to cover that.

Wight - Is that so? How do you know that?

mort-1.jpg
- I own a couple of companies, I'm aware of the proceedings.

mort-1.jpg
- I must warn you, though, this is a bad time to make a strike. The economy is in shambles, and there's a lot of freshly dug up undead eager for a job, ready to work for free for an opportunity to learn the trade.

mort-1.jpg
- If I were you, I would try to hold on to my job.

Wight - Hmm. Maybe you're right. We need to re-think this.

mort-1.jpg
- So, can we pass?

Wight - Yeah, yeah, go ahead...

I hope you enjoyed it, because I'm not entirely satisfied with how it turned out. But I didn't want to delay it anymore. I will try to update again this sunday.
 

MicoSelva

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Yay, an update!

Elder Brain said:
- This is unaceptable! I just had the carpets cleaned this morning!

- Dominate them and make them wipe their feet!

- And kill them too!

Your version of the script always brings a smile to my face, and makes IWD2 look like a predecessor of Deathspank, plot-wise. :thumbsup:

Since I still remember shit from this game, is there much of it left? How many more updates do You think we will be able to enjoy?
 

desocupado

Magister
Joined
Nov 17, 2008
Messages
1,802
Well, there's the guardian to kill, the fields of slaughter and dragon's eye, and the severed hand.

The guardian area and the severed hand might be fun to do, because there are some dialogue there, specially the severed hand, with it's many NPC's.

The fields of slaughter I don't remember much, but the dragon's eye is very much hack and slash.

There's the ice temple again, but that part is exclusively battles, I'm not sure it's worth depicting.

I would wager the LP will reach more than 30 updates, or so.
 

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