NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[GarfunkeL]

http://lurkerfaqs.com/posts/view/602172

And it's all true.

How can biotards believe ME's writing is a tier above a Michael Bay film unless the only media they have ever been exposed to is ME and a Michael Bay film?

That's exactly what it is. And not just Biotards but across the board. Because they are only exposed to video games and latest Hollywood blockbusters, their standards are so low it isn't even funny. When you point this out, they get all defensive because nobody wants to feel like a retard.

 

[thesoup]

What? Human Revolution and Deus Ex 1 are very similar in terms of gameplay and design, Human Revolution was just modernized and had things changed around in it but at it's core it's still the same.

People actually believe this.

Because it's true.

I approve of this sarcasm.

 

[Shannow]

http://www.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments/mbvw0/this_is_why_i_no_longer_hunt_giants_or_mammoths/

Ignoring me, right in charging distance and shooting them with freezing arrows, they all lifted their trunks and trumpeted. It was so... mournful... so pain-filled...

At the time, my callous gamer heart ignored their lament and I actually thought 'bonus, now I don't have to keep dodging them'.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-HvcT7BH1s

 

[gromit]

And thus a Codexian is born... unfortunately of the type we already have too many of.

 

[Erzherzog]

And thus a Codexian is born... unfortunately of the type we already have too many of.

Don't want that kind of jackass on the 'dex

 

[Clockwork Knight]

PETA Attacks Nintendo....again..

http://features.peta.org/mario-kills-tanooki/


ಠ_ಠ

They do realize a Tanooki isn't a real animal, right?...

Tanooki:
In ancient Japanese lore, the Tanooki was a raccoon-like animal that had the ability to turn into stone when threatened by predators.

I'd link the thread itself but it's the forum of an emulation / ROM site so if anyone's interested just google it.

 

[lightbane]

http://www.lensoftruth.com/sledgehammer ... ser-score/

Sledgehammer Games’ Glen Schofield has asked fans of Modern Warfare 3 to support the game on Metacritic. As you know, the game is receiving a ton of low user scores which certainly has Schofield upset. Yesterday, Schofield Tweeted:

“I don’t usually do this but, if u like MW3 go 2 Metacritic.com & help our user score,” “It’s suspiciously low. Be honest but help if u agree.”

That specific Tweet is now missing, but you can read more Tweets from Glen Schofield here. The current user score (out of 10) for Modern Warfare 3 is a 2.7 on Xbox 360, 2.0 on PS3 and 1.5 on PC.

Apparently someone has not bribed enough reviewers...

 

[grotsnik]

OK Android STFU!!! you are the dumbest Xbot ever i am amazed at how stupid you are you are defending MW3 low quality and because of its high sales that makes it a good game… seriously STFU!!! or i’ll go and chop your head off while you and your Xbox are sleeping (wich that was possible, but nope … too bad cause you just suck ass with your hippocratic comments buddy Skyrim is a PS3 win so now what Skyrim sucks and BF3 sucks jajajaja retard.

wzzzgrrfbl?

 

[circ]

OMG. That IS suspiciously low!

 

[DwarvenFood]

It is the user-score. Also don't forget the MW3 fanboys giving 0 score (probably).

Also: http://forums.tigsource.com/index.php?topic=10629.0

 

[Gosling]

OK Android STFU!!! you are the dumbest Xbot ever i am amazed at how stupid you are you are defending MW3 low quality and because of its high sales that makes it a good game… seriously STFU!!! or i’ll go and chop your head off while you and your Xbox are sleeping (wich that was possible, but nope … too bad cause you just suck ass with your hippocratic comments buddy Skyrim is a PS3 win so now what Skyrim sucks and BF3 sucks jajajaja retard.

wzzzgrrfbl?

hippocratic comments

 

[Stinger]

Maybe he's saying that guy's comments "do no harm"?

 

[Coyote]

http://features.peta.org/mario-kills-tanooki/

Holy fuck, this just made my day.

(You can't see it in this image, but Mario constantly drips blood when you're playing.)

 

[grotsnik]

I, er. Ah.

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/for...bly-one-who-thinks-Skyrim-should-have-V-A-T-S

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/for...featuring-rape-in-a-game-going-too-far?page=1

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

http://features.peta.org/mario-kills-tanooki/

Holy fuck, this just made my day.

(You can't see it in this image, but Mario constantly drips blood when you're playing.)

Seriously, these days PETA is absolutely fucking retarded. Sometimes I feel :shame: due to inevitable ending up lumped in with them when I talk about environmentalism.

Another thing I've always wondered is if Grant Morrison is still a PETA member. Back in the 80's he endorsed them at the end of Animal Man, buuuuuuut... PETA isn't exactly what he endorsed it for back then, since they now support and have links to groups like ALF (Morrison strongly disagreed with violent groups like ALF) and now they're so extreme that they'd probably pester him day and night about all those cats he has.

EDIT: Not to mention he openly admits in the book that Animal Man only became a vegetarian because GM himself is vegetarian, and during the book he also admits that he really doesn't have a right to force others to be vegetarian (through Animal Man).

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/for...featuring-rape-in-a-game-going-too-far?page=1

These guys would've liked Van Buren

There is no mention of Rance in the topic. They do not know the wonders of tasteful rape.

 

[DraQ]

Do you guys consider it a spin-off or deus ex 3?

Deus Ex 2.

 

[sgc_meltdown]

bros regarding skyrim's historic interface

http://www.gamasutra.com/blogs/EricSchw ... C_Game.php
http://www.reddit.com/r/gamernews/comme ... a_pc_game/
http://www.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments ... interface/

the amount of people saying well they like it, it isn't so bad, how it's "visually elegant despite being clunky" or being angry at all this elitist nitpicking is quite telling of where rpgs are these days
of course I'm scanning past all the confirmatory posts, isn't this pretty much non-debatable
then again even in Origin and Ubisoft Online DRM discussions there will be people coming in saying "well I didn't have a problem so you guys are being kinda unfair to the companies here"

in fact our bro sea is being pounded like a funeral drum in the first two links

and as for the rest I have a feeling a good portion of them didn't see the interface suck coming at all because bethesda is best rpg makers and previews did not portend anything but greatness and you can't judge it until you buy it anyway

if the current generation can't even agree on probably one of the few objective parts of game design, the damn ui, you can forget about any cohesive upward swing on comprehension of mechanics and the like
sincetelling people that the interface for the game they like can be improved might upset them

"Imagine if Apple made an RPG."
fuck you jeff vogel makes better interfaces than this

as long as you have butterflies that you can collect people will be happy

on a more entertaining note

http://imgur.com/a/tstYg

so bros do you think this shit is bad scripting or tr00 immersion

 

[Luzur]

more like the giant had "follow target" enabled but target was dead in a pond so he was stuck there.

but it kinda put tears into my eyes.

 

[hoopy]

Goons talk about Skyrim:

Speaking of AAA games, Skyrim has done a fantastic job of not fucking up female representation. Every single female NPC I've run into so far has been competent in one way or another (blacksmith, guard captain, trader, etc), and there doesn't seem to be a gender split for occupations.

If you want something really bad in Skyrim, there's a quest in Riften where someone wants you to disgrace her employer by shaming her for having sex with lots of men.

Skyrim so far seems to have a lack of women in top positions of power and leadership.

Yes, this is what Something Awful has become.

 

[Cassidy]

Is anybody surprised to get this out of people who pay for posting in Internet forums?

 

[sgc_meltdown]

Yes, this is what Something Awful has become.

bioware social with even more kneejerk moderation?

 

[Xor]

Is anybody surprised to get this out of people who pay for posting in Internet forums?

I can't imagine the kind of retard who would give money to an internet forum.

Millions for donations, not one cent for posting privileges.

 

[Wyrmlord]

The Ballad of Todd Howard: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7trmEmI ... r_embedded

I plan to watch this video again some time soon, because it brought a smile to my face.

Has anybody ever noticed that the more high tech games of today become, the more awkward the less realistic elements look?

People walking into walls in one direction was typical in Daggerfall. It just looks worse in new age games.

And there are so many FPSes released in the past five years in which enemies are pointing their guns in the opposite direction and firing frantically at the opposite direction. Even in the excellent Call of Pripyat, I killed the dangerous mercenary Black, because he was staring at the walls.

 

[Flatlander]

Has anybody ever noticed that the more high tech games of today become, the more awkward the less realistic elements look?

People walking into walls in one direction was typical in Daggerfall. It just looks worse in new age games.

And there are so many FPSes released in the past five years in which enemies are pointing their guns in the opposite direction and firing frantically at the opposite direction. Even in the excellent Call of Pripyat, I killed the dangerous mercenary Black, because he was staring at the walls.

Uncanny valley.

I think it's one of the main (technical) reasons why modern games tend to be shit and shallow. The more realistic the physics and graphics get, the harder it gets to implement complex stuff without jarring effects.

For some reason this is something that a lot of people seem to have trouble comprehending...