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Mass Effect: Andromeda Pre-Release Thread

Caim

Arcane
Joined
Aug 1, 2013
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Dutchland
Well it's still a studio labelled "BioWare" so they won't be able to pass it off as off-brand so easily.
So wait, it's no longer Bioware Montreal making Mass Effect?
 

Tytus

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dda32d74e14540d1991a9e974d4dc027



Bioware is trying to build hype with stock photos. Well, it's Bioware they used a stock photo for Tali's face, so why not.
 

Freddie

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This is starting to look promising. Delays, stock photos for promotion, at least one character that looks like elder tranny or something. This may turn out to be something very entertaining.
 

Andyman Messiah

Mr. Ed-ucated
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Narnia
This is starting to look promising. Delays, stock photos for promotion, at least one character that looks like elder tranny or something. This may turn out to be something very entertaining.
That just sounds like regular BioWare to me.

"Awful and hilarious" - the BioWare slogan
 

Tytus

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nm8SYQa.png



Quick guys! Let's all sign up for their shitty newsletter to get an equally shitty reward (or at least have a chance to win it!)
 

Tytus

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nkez4vviyqvx.jpg



The Ark thing reminds me of the Outbound Flight extragalactic Ship from Star Wars expanded universe more and more.


outbound-flight-sketch.png
 

Andyman Messiah

Mr. Ed-ucated
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If the game looks anything like these countdown hype pics... well, it's gonna be great.

Man, I haven't been so hyped for a BioWare game since the first screenshots of Dragon Age 2.
 

Kem0sabe

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Azores Islands
With the amount of lore Bioware dumped in the previous games, it's odd that this extra galactic ship was never mentioned, especially considering how it dwarfs the biggest ships humanity has ever constructed.

They should have made a better job of fitting the game into the existing universe, but considering how little fucks they give about retconning, I'm not surprised.
 

Andyman Messiah

Mr. Ed-ucated
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Shush you! BioWare are the masters of RPG world-building according to everyone*! How dare you suggest they have no idea what they're doing?

*Except for Chris Avellone. Bethesda is much better in his opinion.
 

Tytus

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Messages
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Mazovia
CwgquB0XgAAkJ8R.jpg:large









With the amount of lore Bioware dumped in the previous games, it's odd that this extra galactic ship was never mentioned, especially considering how it dwarfs the biggest ships humanity has ever constructed.

They should have made a better job of fitting the game into the existing universe, but considering how little fucks they give about retconning, I'm not surprised.


Well they probably built the thing when Shepard was dead for those 2.5 years, and later was in the Terminus Systems. So he just didn't know! And no one told him, because he didn't ask! He isn't interested in non Reaper things anyway.
 

Modron

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Well they probably built the thing when Shepard was dead for those 2.5 years, and later was in the Terminus Systems. So he just didn't know! And no one told him, because he didn't ask! He isn't interested in non Reaper things anyway.

But...but nobody on Citadel was bitching about having to finance a giant space arc with their taxes. Joking aside you would think such an endeavor would spend years in the planning stages and a spectre agent would be cursorily aware of such a thing even if not interested in it. But then again we are already spending too mcuh thought on a retcon of a universe that has already been repeatedly retconned.
 

Freddie

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Nah, it's in line with game lore. It comes from The Illusive Man's ass like all those Cerberus troopers, weapons, space fighters, battleships, land bases and space stations.
 

Frozen

Arcane
Joined
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Messages
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That ship looks so 90s
Like some cheap ad for a vertically scrolling shooter
 

Andyman Messiah

Mr. Ed-ucated
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I have confidence that BioWare will be able to explain any and all questions that we may have. They have always been the masters of RPG storytelling and shame on you all for doubting them.

Here's my take! *fwoooosh!*

The first three games were actually just military simulations run by a super-advanced super-computer with a power ego trip, installed on board this new supershipcolony or whatever. The power ego trip explains the self-insert mary sue robots (the reapers, the geth, Saren AND Shepard's transformation into cyborgs (since robots are superior to organics) and why everybody ONLY wanted to fuck a computer program with Tricia Helfer's voice once it had a cameltoe installed, or a robot body with a cameltoe to be exact).
The simulation was meant to find out how the universe would fare in a war against a super powerful enemy! Because the super-computer didn't have much military knowledge it drew inspiration from a number of popular video games and science-fiction movies, like Contra, Gears of War, Starship Troopers, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Starship Troopers, Star Trek, Starship Troopers, Star Trek, and Lolita.

*cut to a scene with Keith David voicing a black guy who may be kernel or general or something talking to New Shepard*
New Shepard: "Man, that was some freaky military simulation! At least I got laid several times."
Keith David's new black military guy: "New Shepard! We have to talk! The egg-heads over at the super-computer lab is saying the simulation may NOT HAVE BEEN JUST A SIMULATION!"
"I'm getting laid for real?!"
*awkward animation of Keith David smacking New Shepard in the face*
"Dammit, New Shepard! That's not what's important, New Shepard! It turns out it wasn't simulating fantasy warfare! It was showing us a glimpse of THE NEAR FUTURE!!"
"I'M GONNA GET LAID IN THE FUTURE!"
"UNLESS THE EVIL SPACESHIP ROBOTS KILL US ALL FIRST!"
"I DON'T CARE I'M GONNA FUCK A BLUE CHICK, A CANADIAN GUY, A TEST-TUBE WOMAN AND A LADY WHOSE BODY WAS ALL TATTOOS."

*movie trailer guy (not the dead one): "MASS EFFECT ANDROMEDA - MASS EFFECT BEGINS. FOR REAL THIS TIME."

There. Plotholes solved, or shall we say UTTERLY DESTROYED AND HUMILIATED!? See how easy that was for me? BioWare will no doubt do MUCH, MUCH better than me.

Have faith, ye of little faith!
 

Tytus

Arcane
Joined
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Messages
3,596
Location
Mazovia
I have confidence that BioWare will be able to explain any and all questions that we may have. They have always been the masters of RPG storytelling and shame on you all for doubting them.

Here's my take! *fwoooosh!*

The first three games were actually just military simulations run by a super-advanced super-computer with a power ego trip, installed on board this new supershipcolony or whatever. The power ego trip explains the self-insert mary sue robots (the reapers, the geth, Saren AND Shepard's transformation into cyborgs (since robots are superior to organics) and why everybody ONLY wanted to fuck a computer program with Tricia Helfer's voice once it had a cameltoe installed, or a robot body with a cameltoe to be exact).
The simulation was meant to find out how the universe would fare in a war against a super powerful enemy! Because the super-computer didn't have much military knowledge it drew inspiration from a number of popular video games and science-fiction movies, like Contra, Gears of War, Starship Troopers, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Starship Troopers, Star Trek, Starship Troopers, Star Trek, and Lolita.

*cut to a scene with Keith David voicing a black guy who may be kernel or general or something talking to New Shepard*
New Shepard: "Man, that was some freaky military simulation! At least I got laid several times."
Keith David's new black military guy: "New Shepard! We have to talk! The egg-heads over at the super-computer lab is saying the simulation may NOT HAVE BEEN JUST A SIMULATION!"
"I'm getting laid for real?!"
*awkward animation of Keith David smacking New Shepard in the face*
"Dammit, New Shepard! That's not what's important, New Shepard! It turns out it wasn't simulating fantasy warfare! It was showing us a glimpse of THE NEAR FUTURE!!"
"I'M GONNA GET LAID IN THE FUTURE!"
"UNLESS THE EVIL SPACESHIP ROBOTS KILL US ALL FIRST!"
"I DON'T CARE I'M GONNA FUCK A BLUE CHICK, A CANADIAN GUY, A TEST-TUBE WOMAN AND A LADY WHOSE BODY WAS ALL TATTOOS."

*movie trailer guy (not the dead one): "MASS EFFECT ANDROMEDA - MASS EFFECT BEGINS. FOR REAL THIS TIME."

There. Plotholes solved, or shall we say UTTERLY DESTROYED AND HUMILIATED!? See how easy that was for me? BioWare will no doubt do MUCH, MUCH better than me.

Have faith, ye of little faith!

So basically the plot of nu-XCOM2? Not very imaginitive.




https://twitter.com/masseffect/status/795400389478805504/photo/1

CwnUcB7WQAE7w-g.jpg



There is suppose to be some Bioware stream tomorrow.
 

Drax

Arcane
Joined
Apr 6, 2013
Messages
10,986
Location
Silver City, Southern Lands
inb4 "Andromeda Initiative" is a major email dump from hillary's sex dungeon. It turns out that, all this time, Bioware was just a front for an underground group of hackers from like the 80s, man, and they went unnoticed by acting like a generic video game company while they infiltrated the illuminati reptiles it's aliens urmom podesta's kitchen.
 

Andyman Messiah

Mr. Ed-ucated
Joined
Jan 27, 2004
Messages
9,933
Location
Narnia
So basically the plot of nu-XCOM2? Not very imaginitive.
Is that really the plot of XCOM 2? ("New X-COM spells it XCOM, btw.) I haven't played it.
edit: BOY THANKS FOR SPOILERS DICKHEAD!!

Anyway, I told you, man, I fucking told you. This was just my effort. BioWare's writers are on a completely different level. You can be sure they'll do much better.
 

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