Let Me Trainwreck Final Fantasy VII For You! (Completed!)

[kingcomrade]

Did you get the Mog summon from the chocobo farm? If you attach it with an Elemental matera to Cloud's weapon it helps a lot in one of the upcoming fights, where the dude is allergic to Wind.

 

[Damned Registrations]

If he didn't you're a couple weeks too late too point it out.

The REAL question is did you get any good screenies of something with it's head jammed 3 feet up the ass of a giant bird?

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Don't worry, The Loving Cue doesn't miss anything! Eh, except the head up the giant bird ass thing. Is that part of the riverdance? I did get two shots of two chocobos doing it doggystyle but nothing else up the ass.

 

[Damned Registrations]

The summon has a 1/16 chance of summoning the fatass chocobo. I figured a bit of save stating shennanigans against the right enemy could have produced a lulzy picture.

But you didn't and now I had to explain it so it's not funny anymore. /cry

 

[afewhours]

The next update is going to introduce Yuffie and is going to be at least sixteen inches of awesome, I think. I don't care what afewhours think.

You and the rest of the world. <sigh>

Oh well, I may as well get the embarrassment out of the way. I'm inexplicably fond of the little ninja girl. I don't know why, I guess it's because she goes around behaving like the spoilt teenage brat she's supposed to be. It undermines the whole portentous nonsense of the plot quite nicely.

Yes, yes, she has a stupid laugh, she's annoying, and a lightly-clad jailbait ninja girl, but I kept her in my party the entire time. There is no need to berate me, I know I fall short of society's standards. I was hoping there would be no discussion of the Yuffster, and my shame would not be revealed... oh well... too late now.

Oh, Locue. Please show us the battle sequences. Please teach us how to get the enemy skills. Do it for us.

Ack. I didn't mean for you to go through all that. I was just thinking about what would make playing through this game easier. I got the idea that if you were running through the game as fast as possible, grabbing Beta after Kalm would make things go a bit smoother. I wasn't dropping hints that I wanted to actually see you whack the snake, I was just trying to help, honest! I don't like to make people suffer.

 

[Lesifoere]

I don't like to make people suffer.

That, sir, is patently untrue.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

The summon has a 1/16 chance of summoning the fatass chocobo. I figured a bit of save stating shennanigans against the right enemy could have produced a lulzy picture.

But you didn't and now I had to explain it so it's not funny anymore. /cry

Well, it wasn't funny anyway, you cad.

afewhours: Oh, it wasn't directed at you. Once when I asked how to make the lp better, someone - I don't remember who - kindly suggested to me that I could perhaps show battle stuff so that all updates wouldn't be lines of text. While I agreed with this, I guess this whole update was a poke at that since the battles and the running around modes really are two different worlds with no reasonable way of combining them. Fuckers never wanna use those world breaking limit breaks they have.

And regarding Yuffie: she's fucking insane, man!

 

[Fat Dragon]

It is. It's also very close to Fort Condor.

Ugh. I found that to be one of the most boring parts in the entire game. I especially hated that mini-game you have to play there later on in the game.

 

[afewhours]

That, sir, is patently untrue.

Wah. But I haven't got the spine to be truly evil!

But the more I post on this site, the more my humanity dwindles. Before I know it, I will be a resentful, hateful twat that does nothing but spurt memes and shout MOAR FINAL FANTASY at irregular intervals.

You will know when I'm lost because I'll start a thread entitled "Let's Play! Fallout!" with the intention of trolling half the Codex. Then I'll follow it up with the entire script of Final Fantasy VIII in Comic Sans accompanied by a thousand 5mb .gif files.

afewhours: Oh, it wasn't directed at you. Once when I asked how to make the lp better, someone - I don't remember who - kindly suggested to me that I could perhaps show battle stuff so that all updates wouldn't be lines of text.

Ah, that's alright. I'm just trying to cheer you on. I've got no real suggestions as to how you'd actually compose this thing anyway. It's just that I know FFVII pretty well, and I was wondering how you were crunching numbers behind the scenes. 'tis all.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Ah, that's alright. I'm just trying to cheer you on. I've got no real suggestions as to how you'd actually compose this thing anyway. It's just that I know FFVII pretty well, and I was wondering how you were crunching numbers behind the scenes. 'tis all.

Well, all sorts of cheering and support 's certainly strongly encouraged. :wink:

Next update will be in a day or two. Not sure if we're going to hit Junon just yet, though. I'd like to since I kind of like the place and all but the update is going to be long and silly as it is without the paedophile jokes I have scribbled down in my notepad. See how it goes.

Also: Fort Condor, oh how much I hate thee!

 

[RK47]

isn't that shit optional?

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Because I'm doing a 100% run, NOTHING IS OPTIONAL!!

Don't worry, though. I'm not going to show all that shit in the updates.

 

[kingcomrade]

I actually just beat ff7 for the first time yesterday. I didn't beat Emerald or Ruby weapons though. I'm not really interested in trying.

After finishing it, out of curiosity I downloaded that FF7 movie and watched it. If you haven't seen it, it's just about what you might expect from a Japanese animated movie about a popular Japanese video game. lol his cell phone has the victory fanfare!

What is it with Jap movies, their English voice-overs, and all the chick actors having intolerably weak voices? You know what I mean?

 

[Mamon]

You finished FF7, how did you like it? I always thought it was a good game, although overhyped.

Advent Children sucks.

 

[Mamon]

Double post.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

I actually just beat ff7 for the first time yesterday. I didn't beat Emerald or Ruby weapons though. I'm not really interested in trying.

That means you're an intelligent being.

Yeah, Advent Children is horrible. I don't know who did the voicework but they all really do sound like a bunch of sissies. Even Barret came off as a total wuss with the one "haaaaaurrrghhhh!!!"-line he has.

Then again, the japanese voices are also terrible. They all sounds the same! Seriously. No joke. No racism involved or anything (but I wish). I can't tell any japanese voice actors apart. All the guys are grunts and all the gals are psychos.

 

[kingcomrade]

Yeah I liked it. It's overhyped but it's a fun enough game if you like those sorts. It's got too much of what that tvtropes.org calls Guide Dang It, just like all the Final Fantasies.

I'm playing Final Fantasy 8 right now. My level 14 Squall has 3400 hit points and 100+ strength. Apparently playing without GameFAQs open is a mistake (I missed a bunch of extra stuff in ff7, too) since I was just checking one and it seems I missed three or four secrests so far. The game is pretty bad, though, I never really liked ff8. They should've made Laguna the main character instead of Emoface (as I named him).

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Make sure you do Zell's Love Quest.

 

[afewhours]

It's got too much of what that tvtropes.org calls Guide Dang It, just like all the Final Fantasies.

I think I know what you mean. Ya referring to all the silly arbitary hidden stuff that no-one could possibly find without gamefaqs and/or thousands of hours to waste?

They should've made Laguna the main character instead of Emoface (as I named him).

I'd have forgiven them if they'd let me chat up Quistis instead of Rinoa. I like Quistis.

FFVIII is a silly game.

 

[Comrade Hamster]

FFVIII marked the end of the FF series for me. After sitting through more CG sequences than playtime, my friends and I all agreed that this shit was getting ridiculous and Square was going to begin blowing mainstream cock by focusing on fancy graphics over gameplay. The terrible experience might not have been so bad if the storylines and dialogue weren't so tedious...and juvenile. FFT, IMO, was much better than all the others simply because there was an orgy of backstabbing and betrayal.

 

[kingcomrade]

Final Fantasy 8: The Magic and Junction System Management Simulator

After I beat ff9 and ff7 I was playing 8 and it's just a terrible game. It's almost unplayable how bad the minigames and the constant shuffling around of magic and junctions are, and the incredibly broken battle system. I just deleted the ISOs (another fucking set of PSX games where my CDs were too scratched to work properly any more)

 

[Mareus]

Does anyone have any new information about Final Fantasy 7 remake for Playstation 3?

 

[Comrade Hamster]

Does anyone have any new information about Final Fantasy 7 remake for Playstation 3?

Still just rumors for now, but we'll see when the time comes. Personally, I don't quite understand why they would remake it.

 

[kingcomrade]

Er, wasn't that video just the end to Crisis Core or whatever?

 

[Comrade Hamster]

Er, wasn't that video just the end to Crisis Core or whatever?

There was a tech demo for the PS3 a long time ago with the beginning sequence of FFVII, which spawned a lot of talk, and now they're saying confirmation will come with FFXIII's playable demo.