Crispy™ Controversial opinions about RPGs that you know deep down are true.

[Strange Fellow]

All blobbers have bad combat, no, I'm not going to justify this claim with examples, it's just literally true and you know it.

Wizardry 8 pisses all over this point.

One could argue that wizardry isn't a blobber if they wanted to because your party and enemies actually have formations and can be individually placed separate from others and that placement determines who can attack/be attacked from where. Really only called a blobber because of tradition.

No, your party is still a many-limbed blob within the boundaries of which enemies can't position themselves, only difference is that Wiz 8 is more flexible in where it lets you position each individual set of limbs within the blob, and more refined in the way it handles reach, than your typical grid-based 3-3 formation.

 

[Rules Lawyer]

That would in fact be highly commendable were it not for the fact that their other source of inspiration was retarded cartoons.

If only it were the titty ones.

Urotsukidoji based jrpg.

 

[Cryomancer]

That would in fact be highly commendable were it not for the fact that their other source of inspiration was retarded cartoons.

Their cartoons(anime) has for all tastes. Overlord is pretty good. Hiatus X Hiatus too. The problem is that with jRPG's protagonists are mostly "shonen generi kun" like protagonists

an image of an generi kun

But you can see the difference of jRPG's and true RPG's on cover art

tipical jrpg cover art

And compare to an true RPG.

This is why the good jRPG's are the ones who are more akin to western RPG's like Dragon's Dogma and Dark Souls

 

[Barbalos]

Most jRPG developers never seemed to get over pandering to the high schooler market with their adolescent protagonists and horrifically nonsensical anime storylines. It's a shame really, sometimes the combat in those games is alright, Turn Based with some variation or whatever, but almost always the same awful design choices otherwise.

 

[Hyperion]

But you can see the difference of jRPG's and true RPG's on cover art

I can cherrypick, too.

Spoiler

Spoiler

 

[smaug]

But you can see the difference of jRPG's and true RPG's on cover art

I can cherrypick, too.

Spoiler

Spoiler

Those were made by Americans, what’s your point exactly?

 

[Cryomancer]

I can cherrypick, too.

Both was made by Americans. What is your point exactly? My is that the good JRPG's tends to follow more WRPG's "design principles" than JRPG's. Like Dark Souls and Dragons Dogma.

 

[Lemming42]

The 80s style cover art on older games always repelled me. It feels like it's designed for people having some kind of postmodern identity crisis who need to buy the big strong warrior man on the front cover to reassure themselves, or people gripped by a full mental breakdown. It gets you in the mindset of being about to read a really shit trashy fantasy novel you found at the back of a charity shop, only to try and open it and find the pages are fused together with decades-old dried cum. Always felt very cringey.

I love the ToEE artwork, though.

 

[Hyperion]

But you can see the difference of jRPG's and true RPG's on cover art

I can cherrypick, too.

Spoiler

Spoiler

Those were made by Americans, what’s your point exactly?

It's Box Art for JRPGs. We used to get different box art, but those days are obviously long over. Would you prefer this instead? We can go into Amano Art, or the art for SaGa as well, but that doesn't fit your stupid argument either.

Spoiler

How is comparing a JRPG like Ni No Kuni, a game made specifically for young kids, about a young kid, indicative of all JRPGs? Or shall we be disingenuous faggots over and over to find an excuse to not play games because of "muh maturity?"

Stupidity of the Codex never ceases to amaze me. Then again, this is a forum that actually lauds RTwP gameplay, so nothing should surprise me anymore.

 

[Hyperion]

I can cherrypick, too.

Both was made by Americans. What is your point exactly? My is that the good JRPG's tends to follow more WRPG's "design principles" than JRPG's. Like Dark Souls and Dragons Dogma.

They absolutely do not follow Western design principles. If they did, they would suck, and be boring loads of shit, with shit combat and vast, yet empty expanses of terrain. Your way of rationalizing (and most of the Codex's) playing a Japanese game is saying it's "Western" in nature so you can keep insisting they're superior.

Reality is, the west hasn't released a game worth purchasing at full price, and completing since ToEE.

 

[smaug]

People do not like anime

that alone can make a game unplayable

“Art direction, or death.”

 

[Lemming42]

Reality is, the west hasn't released a game worth purchasing at full price, and completing since ToEE.

This is true, but Japan hasn't released a game with purchasing at full price and completing since like EarthBound, maybe Final Fantasy IX if we're being generous. I can't stand Dark Souls, more like Dork Souls!!!

As usual it falls to the Slavs to pick up the pieces by releasing reliable shovelware shit to keep us going.

 

[anvi]

JRPGs seem to all be made for babies on their playstations. Above average babies because at least it is an RPG, but still. It is so RPG-lite. Cloud type guy uses big sword which is also a gun hur dur. Healer girl plays popamole with HP bars. Spell guy makes entire room freeze and then explode. And if you suck you pop some potions.

 

[Cryomancer]

They absolutely do not follow Western design principles. If they did, they would suck, and be boring loads of shit, with shit combat and vast, yet empty expanses of terrain. Your way of rationalizing (and most of the Codex's) playing a Japanese game is saying it's "Western" in nature so you can keep insisting they're superior.

Reality is, the west hasn't released a game worth purchasing at full price, and completing since ToEE.

Wrong, if Dark Souls was less western like, Dark Souls would have an generic androgynous teenager as an protagonist, instead of allowing you to use halberds, spears, axes, throw bombs, use magic, etc, they would force you to use an oversized katana, have an cartoon artstyle, etc. There are any jRPG protagonist that uses something that was actually useful against armor and large creatures instead of an sword?

 

[Lemming42]

JRPGs seem to all be made for babies on their playstations. Above average babies because at least it is an RPG, but still. It is so RPG-lite. Cloud type guy uses big sword which is also a gun hur dur. Healer girl plays popamole with HP bars. Spell guy makes entire room freeze and then explode. And if you suck you pop some potions.

Don't forget Small Child With Great Magical Ability and Girl With Amnesia Who Can Summon A Whole Fucking Dragon.

Wrong, if Dark Souls was less western like, Dark Souls would have an generic androgynous teenager as an protagonist, instead of allowing you to use halberds, spears, axes, throw bombs, use magic, etc, they would force you to use an oversized katana, have an cartoon artstyle, etc. There are any jRPG protagonist that uses something that was actually useful against armor and large creatures instead of an sword?

Yuffie from FF7 has that giant spike thing. You want to get hit with one of those to prove that it's useless against enemies?

And Ness from EarthBound has a baseball bat that just hits people so hard that they de-atomise.

And what's wrong with androgynous teenagers anyway? Most people playing games IRL probably look closer to your average jRPG twink than they do to the big musclebound barbarians and knights on RPG box art:

That's me. That's what I look like sat at my computer playing Darklands.

 

[Cryomancer]

Yuffie from FF7 has that giant spike thing. You want to get hit with one of those to prove that it's useless against enemies?

Let me use plate armor.

And what's wrong with androgynous teenagers anyway? Most people playing games IRL probably look closer to your average jRPG twink than they do to the big musclebound barbarians and knights on RPG box art:

I an 1,85m(6' 1" tall), with broad shoulders, can lift 500kg on leg press 45º(tlink to proof) and usually like to play with character stronger than myself. What is the problem? And the average guy isn't androgynous as Vaan.

 

[Lemming42]

Steiner from FF9!

Yuffie's spike thing works because in Final Fantasy you're generally fighting dog-penguin things and plants with big teeth and other totally retarded enemy designs. But that's not a uniquely jRPG thing, I mean Albion had you fighting "Storms" which were couds with screaming humans coming out of them for example.

I an 1,85m(6' 1" tall), with broad shoulders, can lift 500kg on leg press 45º(tlink to proof) and usually like to play with character stronger than myself. What is the problem? And the average guy isn't androgynous as Vaan.

Vaan's wearing makeup, as are a lot of Final Fantasy guys. If you ignore his top-eyelid eyeliner and the fact he has perfect skin/shittons of foundation on, he's got an average/stronger than average male body type.

 

[anvi]

That's me. That's what I look like sat at my computer playing Darklands.

Hahaha! He reminds me of He-Man, which reminds me just how homo erotic a lot of stuff is. But at least Darklands guy is with a sexy lady with big b0bs. If you get good at Darklands, you will be irresistible to girls like her.

 

[Butter]

The classic 80s fantasy artwork is great, because you're supposed to aspire to an ideal. Most of us will never in our lives look like that, but we recognize peak performance when we see it. You're not supposed to aspire to being an underweight, androgynous, emo teenager.

 

[Lemming42]

And if you get good at Arena, you'll be irresistible to this person at the front with her twisted warped spine and hideously broken legs:

Or maybe the guy cosplaying as Genghis Khan at the back there if anyone's into that.

As long as we're talking about shit/excellent/excellently shit old box art, I always liked this one, because it's clearly just a drawing of Stevie Nicks:

Spoiler

 

[anvi]

Hot. That blonde on the Arena box, wow. I would never have even got that game installed due to all the furious masturbation.

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

Lotta tits and ass popping up on this thread.

 

[Lemming42]

Hot. That blonde on the Arena box, wow. I would never have even got that game installed due to all the furious masturbation.

Then you'd have missed out on the real masturbation material, which is the ULTRA-HOT in-game Medusa model:

Really though I remember a lot of this kind of box art put me off buying some games as a kid. Arena and Darklands were a bit before I was old enough to go buy games myself but so many games in the early 2000s convinced me to not buy them based on dodgy box art alone. And beyond that, I used to read through those awful gaming magazines that were once popular, and some of the full page ads in those were abominable.

I always got drawn in by shitty 3D artwork instead, probably because I was enough of a dumbass to think the in-game engine might look like that. This shit made me grab it off the shelf the instant I saw it:

Spoiler

 

[anvi]

I love art but I gotta be honest and say I never even noticed a game box before. I can't think of a single one. I used to scour the back though for the deets. But as a kid, if I saw big boobs on the cover I used to assume it was a dumb game. I was wrong sometimes but it was a fair observation. I mean I love hot girls and boobs, but I don't think it is compatible with computer games.

p.s. The only box I can even think of is the first Neverwinter Nights which was all black with a violet colored eye symbol. I liked minimalist boxes instead of ones covered in colors and shit. But mostly I didn't pay attention. I think because I probably saw an awesome looking box when I was about 6 and the game turned out to be totally different and totally shit, so it stopped me paying attention.

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

Crimson Skies art sure reminds me a lot of Warhammer art or any Games Workshop art. I might google this.