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Completed Let's play: Horde! (Finished)

Discussion in 'Codex Playground' started by Darth Roxor, Apr 30, 2009.

  1. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Djibouti
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    Show Spoiler


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    Right, so we are here to assist Chauncey in fighting the EVIL HORDE! and making the kingdom grow in various places around the world.

    It's hard to say what Horde is specifically but it's something of an economic strategy combined with an action game, you'll see for yourself anyway.

    Prepare for an EPIC adventure!

    Each mission starts with something similar to a briefing, telling you where you are going

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    The Chancellor is an arsehole that will do anything to see us phail miserably, but he's a well-done cliche Vizier type of guy. His voice acting is also good for the role.

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    So, here we are, the Shimto Plains.

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    Not a real damn lot to start with, but it'll have to do for now.

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    We'll begin by planting a few trees, it takes only 1 gold piece for a sapling, and when they grow you can cut them down for 5 gold. Not that much of a spectacular income, but it helps

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    After that, a few traps.

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    And since we don't really have anything other to do right now, we end the season and call THE HORDE!

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    A simple task - kill off 5 hordlings before they destroy all buildings, eat all your crops and townspeople or kill you.

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    The first hordlings (of which I forgot to take a screen here) are relatively easy - they die in one hit and are stupid enough to walk into traps or drown if they stay underwater for too long.

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    Victory! And without any losses too. So far so good.

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    Spring's behind, time for summer. The 'save 20 crowns' objective is vital, 'cause if you don't pay taxes after an end of a year, you lose. Plain and simple.

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    Our town got a little bigger, but it's still a shithole. Cut down a few trees, planted a few new ones. Nothing left to do - call in the horde!

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    See the busted building in the upper right corner, and a hordling standing in the centre of the ruin massaging his belly with delight? Yup, that means we've just lost a farmer, because Chauncey is a fat cock and didn't get there in time to save him.

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    Four crops and one guy. Well, that's not bad either, we still get steady income, so it doesn't matter really.

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    Sometimes between seasons you get these random messages. They seem like just a random comic relief, but in reality they give you information about stuff that might happen. In this case, a drought, which means we'll be getting a lot of patches with rocks in the future and less crops, which is not good.

    Anyway, back to base

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    Cows indeed are a good investment, each one produces 20-25 (forgot the exact amount) gold at an end of a seaon, but they also cost 100 gold, which is more than we can currently spend.

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    And here we have the dreaded rock patches. Crops can't grow on them, trees can't grow on them, cows can't forage on them and you can't plant any traps/fences/hirelings on them, and they are a bitch to remove (some need only one hit with the shovel (10 gold), but some won't go off even after 5 hits).

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    We should save some cash for a cow, so I didn't buy anything this round

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    This went well alright. Two of the stupid hordlings drowned in the nearby river. Idiots.

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    Captain Obvious Tip to the rescue

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    Here's another shot of the map for our humble village. Bigger than in spring, eh?
    Btw spring, notice the snowflake next to the 'inventory' screen - it means the year is at an end and we'll have to pay the greedy jews their friggin taxes, so we'll better save 20 gold, right?

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    Fuck that! Let's buy a cow and go bankrupt!

    Aaaaaand, the last horde attack this year

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    MAN DOWN. But only one, fortunately

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    Great...

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    Oh yeah? I see those sidelocks you're hiding under the balding toupee, faggot :x

    After that we're sent to The Shoppe where we can buy additional equipment or sell it for half the price if we are not happy about it and save the game.

    Here's our current equipment:

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    We're so out of cash that I can't even buy the cheapest thing which costs 50 gold...

    Oh well,

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    Stay tuned for another blood-boiling, collar grabbing episode of THE HORDE AT THE SHIMTO PLAINS D: ! D: !!!!!!!!!
     
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2017
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  2. JarlFrank I like Thief THIS much Patron

    JarlFrank
    Joined:
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    Location:
    Secret Lab of the Warrior-Magus of Esoteric RPGism
    What the fuck kind of game is that, it looks awesome.
     
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  3. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    Because it *is* awesome. And gets pretty fucking frustrating later on.
     
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  4. Bluebottle Erudite Patron

    Bluebottle
    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2005
    Messages:
    1,182
    Dead State Wasteland 2
    Looks like a much, much better version of Hinterland.

    Also, larping intros need to make a comeback.
     
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  5. Hory Erudite

    Hory
    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2003
    Messages:
    3,002
    It's made by the guys who made Star Control, by the way.
     
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  6. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    Definitely :D
     
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  7. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    Oh, I didn't post a screen from the intro where Chauncey admits being an orphan raised by cows.
     
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  8. Satori (original) Arbiter

    Satori (original)
    Joined:
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    Messages:
    6,992
    Looks like ActRaiser but better.
     
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  9. BethesdaLove Arbiter

    BethesdaLove
    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2008
    Messages:
    1,998
    Dwarf Fortress lite.
     
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  10. asper Cipher

    asper
    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2007
    Messages:
    2,142
    Project: Eternity
    This looks positively awesome. This kind of absurd wacky humor rocks. I'm down on my knees praising the Codex right now for bringing yet another gem to my attention! HEAVAN
     
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  11. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Djibouti
    Welcome back, my loyal subjects. This time, we shall face the second year on the Shimto Plains.

    Let us proceed!

    Show Spoiler


    Uh... right, something strange happened and the screenshots from the 'economic' part of Spring didn't get saved, but no matter, it was the regular business - sold a few trees, planted a few new ones and called in the horde.

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    Faggots tried to eliminate the villager, but I saved him in time. One last hordling remains, CHARGE!

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    Und we are victorious again.

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    It would appear that spring was good for trees this time around.

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    And behold how we bought a second cow to get moar greedy jewish $$$$

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    Uh... shit. Well, I honestly have no idea what to do with this, since I don't believe rocks under houses have any very morbid consequences, and we don't have gazillions of cash to remove all these goddamn patches.

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    A last look on our settlement before we end summer.

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    Goddamn rocks also reduce your movement speed...

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    MAN DOWN

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    Another villager went to attend the great gig in the sky

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    At least the crops are alright and we didn't lose cows. They are vital since they provide cash. Honestly, I don't even know what the villagers do exactly, but anyway, I suppose protecting them is a good idea.

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    Autumn sees the rise of our herd.

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    And autumn is gone.

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    See these jumping faggots in the bottom? They are a new type of Hordling we'll be facing. They are fast as fuck, hit harder and rarely stop even to chomp on villagers, but at least they still die in one hit. Notice the ruined building, but at least the peasant is intact

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    And here's the most apparent problem with the fast hordlings: CROPS -8. The bitches are fast and *really* like to run around pointlessly taking all the crops with them.

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    Vynter.

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    See the rock patch between the two cows? Eventually cows eat out all the grass on a square and leave stones behind, so you have to look after your cows in every turn to see if they don't need moving, since leaving them out there, standing on rocks will halt their gold income.

    Also, since it's the end of the year I didn't buy anything except a couple of saplings so we can have cash to buy stuff after we get financially assaulted by Chancellor Hebrew

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    ACHT HORDLINGEN KOMMEN IN SCHNELL, HERR KOMMANDANT!!

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    Whoop-de-doo, more jumping faggots. At least the villager in the ruined house is safe.

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    ... which can't be said about the one in this ruined house... but then again, saving all of them is nearly impossible, when you get assaulted from 2-3 fronts and you hear 'HELP!!' three times at the same time, and all of them are in the completely opposite parts of the map.

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    And again, lots of the crops got wasted, but fortunately, their part in the income is not *that* big when compared to the cows.

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    blablabla

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    Oh, you gotta be shitting me :x


    Anyway, now for some CHOICES AND CONSEQUENCES, BITCH, and participation of the audience, I'll allow you (YES, YOU!) to choose what to buy:

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    This is basically a lure - you drop one, a hordling comes by, eats it and is immobilized for a few seconds.

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    Well, teleportation, nothing more to add, except that it's expensive.

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    Bomb. Throw it and watch it asplode. Do I need to explain further?

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    These d00dz can be hired during the strategy part, and basically, they act like melee-ranged turrets. They'll stand in a square in which you plant them and whack any hordling that gets close.

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    Walls. A more expensive version of the fence that I never used, since the fence is p. useless, but the walls can withstand some serious punishment as far as I recall.



    Which is better and why? DISCUSS!!
     
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2017
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  12. Sovard Sovereign of CDS

    Sovard
    Joined:
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    Messages:
    920
    So, basically, this puts many recent games I dare not mention to shame.

    Mainly because it looks fun.
     
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  13. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    It is helluva fun, mainly thanks to its cartoony atmosphere. The graphics, the cut-scenes, the humour are all gud, not to mention the ridiculous (but not irritating) jolly music playing in the background when the Horde appears, and those regular Hordlings themselves just look, well, cute.
     
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  14. Black_Willow Arcane

    Black_Willow
    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2007
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    Location:
    Borderline
    That guy in armour has a great haircut. Take him!
     
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  15. Satori (original) Arbiter

    Satori (original)
    Joined:
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    6,992
    This is very cool, keep it up! Another vote for the Knight.
     
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  16. Dire Roach Prophet

    Dire Roach
    Joined:
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    Location:
    Machete-Knight Academy
    Go for the bomb. It is the holiest weapon of all. Allahu Akbar!
     
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  17. HanoverF Arcane Patron

    HanoverF
    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2002
    Messages:
    5,890
    MCA Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Codex USB, 2014 Divinity: Original Sin 2
    iirc you need the wall if you hope to have your cows survive once the third type of hoardling shows up, but I'll vote bomb.
     
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  18. Darth Roxor Prestigious Gentleman Wielder of the Huegpenis

    Darth Roxor
    Joined:
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    Well, not exactly, since there's barely anything that can STOP the third type of hordling, and placing knights next to each cow to carry out divine judgement also works, although placing walls around them is relatively cheaper.
     
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  19. Rabidredneck Scholar

    Rabidredneck
    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2009
    Messages:
    303
    Get the knight, just for his "I smash stuff gud" factor.
     
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  20. Andyman Messiah Mr. Ed-ucated

    Andyman Messiah
    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2004
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    9,928
    Location:
    Narnia
    First off: Darth, I fucking love you for doing this.

    Second off: Go with Le Bombe.
     
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  21. dragonfk Erudite

    dragonfk
    Joined:
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    2,487
    Knowing how you'll be punished in later stages I vote for wall.
     
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