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Let's Play New Vegas - Old World Blues

Discussion in 'Codex Playground' started by grotsnik, Nov 28, 2011.

  1. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    grotsnik
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    So, seeing as how the Ultimate Edition's coming out next year and Steam seems to be offering the entire game for tuppence, I thought I might as well try heading into the Mojave desert for a quick spin with all four of New Vegas' DLCs; Honest Hearts, Dead Money, Old World Blues and Lonesome Road - basically, give people a chance to see if they're worth bothering with or not.

    We start in medias res, with a level 15 Courier; if you want to reacquaint yourself with the main plot, there's been about ten pages' worth of NV vanilla LPs and at least one, by RK47, that made it beyond Novac. You can find it here:

    http://rpgcodex.net/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=51374

    Without further ado, then, let's begin by delving into the dusty canyons of Utah for a tale of new colonialism, holy lands, resurrected Van Buren content, the redemptive power (and limitations) of religion, and insanely tedious, transparently time-wasting fetch-quests.

    That is to say - Honest Hearts.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]: Ugh...fuckballs. I know I've spent the past month trekking endlessly across the wasteland hunting the poorly voice-acted man who shot me in the head and left me to die, while uncovering his motives that appear to be of such great import as to concern all of the factions of the Mojave, but suddenly I feel like what I really want to do is wander off into an entirely separate stretch of America and do something completely different.

    Fortunately, our hero has got wind of exactly the sort of job he craves; the Happy Trails Caravan Company are looking for mercenaries and dependable hired hands to help escort them to New Canaan. Best to head over to their HQ and enquire.

    Of course, like all of the most reputable businesses, the Happy Trails Caravan Company runs its affairs out of a cave.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]: Howdy, friend. Heard my little broadcast, did you? Yeah, you look the type.

    [​IMG]: The job is simple. Help us get this caravan into Zion and find New Canaan. The pay is 25 caps per day, half up front, half upon return.

    [​IMG]: If you don't know how long it's going to take you to find New Canaan, and you're paying me per day, how can you possibly know to pay me half-

    [​IMG]: You'll get a bonus if we make it into Zion, plus another bonus if we reach New Canaan.

    Jesus, this guy treats bonuses like they're worthless ways of simultaneously patting you on the back and marking out progress. Sort of like achievements, I guess.

    [​IMG]: Oh, and don't mention the name 'Joshua Graham' to anyone. Ever.

    [​IMG]: Who's Joshua Graham, and why shouldn't I talk about him?

    [​IMG]: Just don't. It makes the New Canaanites powerful uncomfortable, and it scares the britches off the tribals.

    [​IMG]: Don't talk about the Burned Man either, while you're at it. Trust me on this one, it's for your own good.

    Nice bit of awkwardly-shoehorned-in foreshadowing there. Let's chin-wag with some of our fellow mercs.

    [​IMG] Looking to join this caravan, huh? Looks to me like you can handle yourself.

    [​IMG] This work suits me. I've tried staying in one place, but it never works out. Grew up in New Reno, and I couldn't put that snakepit behind me fast enough.

    Maybe she knows Myron!

    [​IMG] Imagine New Vegas if there was no Mr House-type fella keeping the peace, then give everybody a gun and a Jet addiction.

    Yeah, she definitely knows Myron. Let's keep mingling; the other merc is wearing, curiously enough, a Vault suit and a Pip-Boy.

    [​IMG] You looking for trouble, bud? I got plenty to spare, so watch your ass around me.

    [​IMG]: So...er...what do you do around here?

    [​IMG] : You want to know what I do, bud? Anything I fucking want! I'm one of a kind! I been places, see? And done things - lots of them! And when it's time to kill shit up? Hell, yeah, I'm a fucking storm of death!

    It should be noted that, despite this spot-on skewering of the wish-fulfilment Angry Joe sensationalist-crap player-archetype, the New Vegas team will nevertheless in a later DLC decide to encourage the player to randomly detonate unexploded nuclear warheads jammed into the sides of cliffs because it's like, awesome to explode shit, bro.

    [​IMG]

    Oh, for fuck's sake.

    [​IMG]: (Survival) Deathjaws, eh? Did you mean to say 'Deathclaws'?

    [​IMG] No, no, you heard me right - Deathjaws. They're like Deathclaws - but bigger teeth!

    [​IMG] Or there was that time one of them Steel Brotherhood assholes made the mistake of messing with me - last mistake he ever made!

    [​IMG] Before he knows what hit him, I draw my 11mm machinegun and BAM! BAM! Right through the eyeslit in his helmet. DOA!

    I'm pretty sure this was exactly the design process behind the slo-mo kills in VATS.

    [​IMG]: (Guns) Too bad there's no such thing as an 11mm machinegun.

    [​IMG] : There so is! Or maybe it was 9mm...or 10. Said I was good at killing shit up! Never said I was good with numbers.

    [​IMG]: So I see you've got a Pip-Boy. Want to tell me about that?

    [​IMG] : Sorry, the shit I do with it is so far over your head, be wasting my time trying to put it into words you'd understand! Basically, it makes me badass. More badass, I mean.

    Right, that's it. Time to puncture this little prick's delusions.

    [​IMG]: (Speech) I don't think your Pip-Boy's working. I'd better go tell Jed.

    [​IMG] Try it! Your word against mine, fucko! See what happens!

    [​IMG]: I'm convincing, you're not. He'll believe me.

    [​IMG] ...look, this is a sweet gig for me! Don't go fucking it up! What are you after, anyways?

    [​IMG]: What I want is for you to scram. This expedition doesn't need you.

    [​IMG] Fine! You win, asshole! Enjoy leading the expedition into a fucking ambush! I hope you all die!

    Yeah, that definitely won't happen.

    You can also blackmail Ricky into carrying some equipment for you, bypassing the 75kg weight limit. There's actually not that much point forcing him to leave, apart from for the skill-check XP; if he stays with the caravan, you do at least get to rob his corpse after the White Legs attack.

    Anyway, having done our bit for the expedition by chasing away one of its core members, we're ready to set out for Zion. En route, Jed begins to blather:

    [​IMG]: Road's slow-going ahead, so you might as well keep your ears open and listen to what old Jed has to say.

    [​IMG]: A few decades back, folks in the NCR started to hear about a community in northern Utah called New Canaan. Didn't know much about them - except that they were religious folks. Sent out missionaries to talk to the tribes.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]: But then the Legion arrived in Arizona. Turns out Caesar's first war chief, the Malpais Legate, was a New Canaanite. Joshua Graham.

    Fuck you, Jed. So you're allowed to talk about him and we're not?

    [​IMG]: Legend goes that Graham was the toughest, meanest son of a bitch in the entire damned Legion. New Canaanites wouldn't talk about him - suppose they were ashamed.

    [​IMG]: Well, at Hoover Dam, Graham finally met his match. Hanlon and Oliver kicked his New Canaanite butt back over the river. Caesar had to make an example for the others - show that even at the highest level, failure wouldn't be tolerated.

    [​IMG]: He had Graham covered in pitch, lit on fire and thrown into the Grand Canyon. People say he didn't even scream on the way down.

    [​IMG]: Not long after, some of the slaves and tribals started to talk. Said Graham wasn't dead. Shouldn't have been any surprise. All this talk bothered Caesar, so he forbade anyone from speaking his name. Wanted to erase Joshua Graham from history.

    [​IMG]: He got his wish. Joshua Graham disappeared. And in his place came legends of the Burned Man walking the wastes. Probably just a tribal ghost story. Maybe the Malpais Legate is dead.

    [​IMG]: Or maybe Joshua Graham did crawl out of that canyon and finally found his way back home.

    Interesting. Here's Joshua Graham as he would've been in Van Buren:

    The most obvious difference so far is the simplification of the backstory, which you can't really argue against. Having Graham being both Hanged and Burned (and being called 'Hanged' when presumably his bandages would be a much more striking part of his visual identity) seems unnecessary and a bit muddled.

    Anyway, the little caravan trail wends its way into the hills of Zion, and the Courier finds he's feeling stronger. Not only that - he now has access to a perk that perfectly suits a Codexian hero:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]: Splendid.

    NEXT TIME: Ambush! Colonial snobbery! Lunchboxes! Ranger hats! Bears!
     
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  2. Kz3r0 Arcane

    Kz3r0
    Joined:
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    Re: Let's Tear Through the New Vegas DLC - HH

    The epitome of RPGyness right there.
    So are you in a NV binge, as opposite of other Codexers being in a Skyrim binge?
    Good job, someone must upheld the Codex standards of true RPGing and Avellone adoration.
    :thumbsup:
     
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  3. Crooked Bee wide-wandering bee Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2013 Codex 2014 PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 BattleTech Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire
    This is a great idea.
    :thumbsup:
     
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  4. Majestic47 Learned

    Majestic47
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    Never see the value in DLCs...and I kinda grew tired of NV bleak, brown world after a while...so yeah, good luck with this LP :)
     
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  5. Black Arcane

    Black
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    Honest Farts is easily the worst DLC to NV.
    Somebody should tell Obsidian that tribal stuff wasn't cool in FO2, it's not cool now.
     
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  6. Monocause Arcane

    Monocause
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    Well, I thought that introducing tribals to the postapocalyptic world was an excellent idea, just rather poor in execution and there was not enough in-game lore provided about them.
     
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  7. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    grotsnik
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    Eh, they're actually pretty good. By which I mean, all of them are flawed experiences (and at least two of them are very flawed), and they all have too much anonymous combat apart from Dead Money, but they also all have their own good reasons for existing and their own distinct identities - none of them feel churned-out or cheap.

    I marginally prefer Honest Hearts to Lonesome Road; HH has an interesting thematic setup and a strong central character but it somehow forgets to include any kind of engaging main questline structure or really develop its themes, whereas Lonesome Road's story...well, we'll get to that.

    Yup, Skyrim doesn't really appeal to me at all, but I'm currently only in sporadic employment and in need of diversion. So time's being divided between New Vegas, a bit of dicking around with toolsets and a really masochistic and thus-far unsuccessful attempt to come to terms with HOMM4.

    :love:
     
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  8. lightbane Arcane

    lightbane
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    Awesome idea for a lp, good work for being one of the few codexers that have not fallen under Skryimjob's evil influence.

    :thumbsup:
     
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  9. anus_pounder Arcane

    anus_pounder
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    Location:
    Yiffing in Hell
     
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  10. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    grotsnik
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    [​IMG]

    (Yeah, Ricky's in this picture. I fucked up the Fraps and ended up using a different save by mistake.)

    As the caravan makes its way up through the canyons, Jed tries his hand at giving a stirring speech.

    [​IMG] All right, people. Been a long couple of weeks, but here we are - Zion.

    [​IMG] We...know that, Jed. We've been here with you this whole time.

    [​IMG] I know your feet hurt, I know you're tired - but I need everyone's minds on the trail ahead.

    [​IMG] Ain't the trail ahead worries me, Jed. Those descents we made, back through the slot canyon back up there? Ain't no way we're getting back out the way we came. And then what?

    I can't help feeling there's a reason Happy Trails isn't quite as impressive as the Crimson Caravan Company.

    [​IMG] The New Canaanites will know a way. And if they don't, we got the maps on our friend's Pip-Boy there.

    If Ricky was still with us, presumably that would be referring to him, since we sure as hell don't have a map telling us how to get out of Zion.

    [​IMG] Enough lollygagging! Get a move on and keep an eye out for tribals!

    [​IMG] Hah! Tribals? Those subhuman savages would never have the tactical understanding required to surround us from an elevated position, opening fire and wiping out everyone almost immediately-

    [​IMG] AMBUSH!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] My God, they've surrounded us from elevated positions all around the canyon! (Exactly the sort of dirty, underhanded behaviour you'd expect from savages.)

    [​IMG]

    The Courier uses his superior tactical understanding to freeze time and then shoot the filthy tribals. (BAM! BAM! Right through the eyeslit in their helmet. DOA!)

    Sadly, as the dust clears, it appears the other members of the caravan weren't so lucky. Stella lies splayed across the canyon floor; Jed's head has exploded.

    [​IMG] Jed, my old friend and mentor, your death will not have been in vain. You will be avenged-

    [​IMG]

    46 bottle caps. He...only had 46 bottle caps. He promised us 25 caps a day. A DAY. PLUS BONI.

    Absolute motherfucker.

    Proceeding along the canyon, over a rickety bridge, our hero is suddenly shot upon from afar. And then...something blurry happens.

    [​IMG]

    This is the moment when a number of players end up accidentally setting the entire map to 'hostile'. Essentially, a White Leg pops up and starts shooting, after which Follows-Chalk, the player's ally, attacks the enemy tribal from behind, knocks him down, then shoots him in the head. Unfortunately, the two look pretty much the same from this distance, tan figures set against a tan background, and it's all too easy to hit Follows-Chalk when shooting at the White Leg, or hear Follows-Chalk's gunfire and assume he's attacking the player as well.

    Clearly, what's needed here is some kind of cinematic cutscene.

    Anyway, proceeding up the slope, we encounter our unlikely saviour.

    [​IMG] I'll try and communicate with it. (Loudly) HOW. ME BIG-SHOT WHITE MAN COME WITH FIRESTICK. YOU BRING TRIBUTE, CHOP-CHOP.

    [​IMG] Hoi! White Legs don't leave survivors often. You're some kind of lucky, I can tell you.

    [​IMG] (My God, it's even cruder than I feared.) ME WANT TRADE. ME HAVE SHINY MUGS AND EMPTY SUNSHINE SASPARILLA BOTTLES, WANT EXCHANGE FOR YOUR GOLD AND UNIQUE OVERPOWERED WEAPONRY. IS GOOD TRADE.

    [​IMG] You came from outside, didn't you? From the civilised lands? Wow...Joshua will want to hear about this.

    [​IMG]

    Follows is cheerful but naive; if you shoo him away, he'll become apologetic, thinking he's offended you somehow, and suggest you visit Joshua at the Dead Horse encampment. Since we've got to go there anyway to pick up any kind of quest, we may as well have him tag along.

    Anyway, the Courier hasn't been paying attention for the past fifteen minutes, so he asks the stupid question.

    [​IMG] Who is this Joshua?

    [​IMG] Joshua Graham - the leader of our tribe. Thanks to him, the Dead Horses are strong, and safe from our enemies.

    [​IMG] He'll want to talk to anyone coming up from south-east. Guess that means just you, now. Come, I can take you to him.

    All right, then - let's pay Mr Kurtz a visit.

    [​IMG] Hmm. Very well, I suppose I could use your instinctive, animal knowledge of the landscape to my advantage. Sort of like a trained dog. All right, then...come, slave.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Wearily, his eyes lowered, the native submits to his bondage, his natural position as the servant of the civilised man, a mere beast of burden, simple and afraid, flinching at every sound as if it is the crack of his master's whip-

    [​IMG] Hold up - see that log over there? Take a closer look. There might be some tasty stuff tucked inside.

    [​IMG] :x SILENCE!

    As we head east towards the gorge, the decapitated body of a gecko goes flying up into the air. And then we see it-

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Freeze! Don't move a muscle. Yao Guai.

    [​IMG] Don't you tell me what to do, tribal cur!

    The Courier then comes to the conclusion not to move a muscle all of his own volition, and the beast lumbers away out of sight.

    [​IMG] Hoo! That was some kind of lucky. Guess it was full of gecko, neh?

    [​IMG] You can take the path north, if you like, or head east over the ridge. There's a nice view from the top of that cliff, if you want a look.

    [​IMG] But...isn't the top of the cliff where that giant mutant bear-thing literally just went, several seconds ago?

    [​IMG]...

    [​IMG] Follows, are...are you trying to get me killed?

    [​IMG]...

    Reasoning that a simple tribal would never have the cunning needed to trick him, the Courier wanders east over the ridge, only to find...

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] :x FOLLOWS!

    I don't think I ever got far enough into Fallout 3 to encounter Yao Guai, so I didn't know what to expect...but this little scripted sequence was kind of odd. I assumed the point of it was that the bears were the big bad monsters of the map, and this was a way of warning the player to avoid them, but they go down pretty fast.

    Still, the view is kind of nice.

    [​IMG]

    One annoying detail here - if we start straying too far in the wrong direction, Follows will start warning us that we're going the wrong way.

    So, naturally, we ignore him, and wander into a nearby cabin to find ourselves a ranger's hat. Time to put on a pair of khaki shorts and roam the wasteland, chastising litterers and teaching schoolchildren how to make bark rubbings.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] BRO ONLY YOU CAN PERVENT FOREST FRIES

    The Dead Horses camp is surrounded by heads on spikes, bear-traps, and crude graffiti. It's also about ten fucking miles down a linear gorge.

    [​IMG]

    Until, at last, we come to the encampment.

    [​IMG]

    No matter what you think of the concept of tribals as a whole, the Dead Horses are...bland, really. They refuse to go into pre-war buildings, they say 'neh' a lot...and that's most of what we know of them in-game. Looking back, it's a little surprising Obsidian didn't go with this lot-

    http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Daughters_of_Hecate

    -who'd actually have a reason to stand against the Legion and their allies, plus a firmer identity, more moral ambiguity and a H Rider Haggard-esque female leader to provide some conflict with Joshua - besides which, we'd even encountered the Vipers beforehand in vanilla NV, who'd been treated as a generic Raider faction instead of having their backstory and traditions explored. Ah, well.

    Anyway, heading into a nearby cave, we're confronted by a bald woman.

    [​IMG] Hoi! Owslander zookuh Joshua Graham?

    [​IMG]

    The Sneering Imperialist convo options are cute, but they just piss her off and end the conversation prematurely, so we go with the Intelligence check first.

    [​IMG] (Intelligence) Am I...looking for Joshua? Yes, I am. Can you tell me where he is?

    [​IMG] You know our tongue - smart owslander.

    [​IMG] If you speak English, then why didn't you fucking speak it to begin with? This is exactly like when that snotty French waiter pretended not to understand what I was saying when I was asking for directions to the Pompidou Centre. Bastard.

    [​IMG] Joshua in high place of cave. You show respect, utman! Joshua is greatest warrior. You no show him respect, he show you thunder and fire!

    Right, that's it. Time to show her how us CIVILISED folk deal with blowhards.

    [​IMG] (Sneering Imperialist) Back off, savage - I'm just here for a map out of this shithole valley, not to kowtow to your messiah.

    [​IMG] Shiass! Would kill you myself, but Joshua says no harm to visitors until harm done to ourselves.

    That...doesn't sound like the Malpais Legate we heard about. Let's seek him out.

    [​IMG]

    And there he is. Swaddled in bandages, his hands working mechanically across a pile of pistols, cleaning, reloading...strange. Is he really the only one in the tribe capable of keeping a gun in working order, or is this more of an act of meditation?

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] White Legs seem to be the only visitors we have these days...and I wouldn't have expected anyone from the Mojave to come looking for us.

    [​IMG] And you're a courier, no less. Not the one I was expecting, but I suppose he wouldn't have come with a caravan.

    ...So he was expecting another courier?

    [​IMG] I don't know if you were close to the other members of your group, but you have my sympathy. I pray for the safety of all good people who come to Zion, even Gentiles, but we can't expect God to do all the work.

    Well, on first glance, he certainly doesn't seem like the feared butcher of Caesar's Legion. Hell, he looks and acts more like a vicar in a mummy costume, and he talks like he's doing an impression of Kiefer Sutherland in Phonebooth. And yet...

    And yet there's a certain bite to his voice that threatens to undermine his Christian pleasantries - you can't be sure if part of him's being sarcastic, or if he doesn't truly believe it, or if he's holding something back. It's actually a pretty nice bit of voice-acting.

    [​IMG] How do you know so much about what happened to me?

    [​IMG] The White Legs are capable scouts. Nothing passes into or out of Zion without my hearing of it.

    [​IMG] I came here with the Happy Trails Caravan Company to make contact with the New Canaanites.

    [​IMG] Happy Trails. I remember. They were good friends.

    [​IMG] I have bad news for your employers. New Canaan was destroyed, its citizens scattered. All because of the White Legs. And Caesar, of course.

    [​IMG] The White Legs want to join the Legion. Caesar's rite of passage is the destruction of the New Canaanites, almost assuredly because of me.

    [​IMG] The good news is that we can help you find your way back. Daniel, one of the other new Canaanites, has made many maps of the region.

    A Mormon missionary by the name of Daniel? I wonder...

    [​IMG] The bad news is that we can't help you right now. Not with everything that's going on.

    The DLC doesn't give you an alternative questline; either you help out Joshua and Daniel, or you shoot up the entire population and take the maps for yourself. It's irritating for pro-Legion players, who have absolutely no reason to help them and every reason to try and ally themselves with the White Legs instead. But fuck it, we may as well be helpful.

    [​IMG] I'm not going to leave without offering to help. What can I do?

    [​IMG]

    Again, there's that odd edge to his voice when he starts rhapsodising about God.

    [​IMG] Daniel and I need pre-war tools to help us navigate beyond Zion. Should we need to evacuate, these instruments will be vital to us.

    [​IMG] Normally, we would have the Dead Horses or Sorrows look for them, but many Pre-War buildings in the valley are considered taboo. They won't go inside.

    Perhaps it's just an in-game excuse for not having the Dead Horses run their own fucking fetch-quests, but there's also something interesting there; have the devolved, the primitive tribals really forgotten their more civilised past? Or are they themselves repressing their collective, unconscious, dangerous memories of pre-war humanity, by avoiding coming into contact with the symbols of that past? Have either Joshua or the tribals managed to truly resurrect themselves, or will they always be burdened down with the fallout of what they once were?

    [​IMG] Hey, that's the name of the game!

    [​IMG] Then it's settled. Follows-Chalk can help you find your way around the valley.

    [​IMG] FUUU....

    And so this genuinely interesting character sets us the dullest and least imaginative of quests. Our job is, I shit you not, to travel across the map looking for lunchboxes and compasses. Usually there'll be some monsters hanging around near them, just to freshen things up.

    NEXT TIME: We encounter Daniel, who's even further from his Van Buren counterpart than Joshua.
     
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  11. Crooked Bee wide-wandering bee Patron

    Crooked Bee
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    Codex 2013 Codex 2014 PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 BattleTech Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire
    Wonderful.
     
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  12. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    grotsnik
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    And so, accompanied by his annoyingly talkative and unsubservient tribal guide, the Courier sets off into the canyons of Zion.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Sure is nice to explore all of the taboo places without the elders yelling at me.

    [​IMG] For the last time, SHUT UP, YOU FUCKING SAVAGE!

    A few things about the Zion level design; it does manage to have lots of gorges, canyons, and sheer cliffs without ending up being too linear. But a little too often you find yourself asking 'How the hell do I get down this high promontory to where I need to be?' to which the only non-tedious answer is 'judder your way down the side of it, defying the laws of physics'.

    It also seems to cause a bit more bugging-out from the local wildlife. Here's a Radscorpion ascending vertically into the air, only to get stuck on a ranger's cabin roof.

    [​IMG]

    Still, visually it's a step up from the vanilla game. The mornings tend to be overcast and grey, with patchy rain, which makes a nice change.

    There are plenty of places to explore, but a dispiriting number of them are copy-and-paste, without anything of interest to them; ranger stations, campsites, picnic-spots, bridges, even the middle of a river...

    [​IMG]

    En route, we stop and have a chat with Follows about Joshua.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] What did Joshua do for you?

    [​IMG] He taught us how to hold our territory, to protect ourselves. He guided us away from Caesar, and showed us how Caesar would have destroyed us.

    [​IMG] Do you remember anything about Joshua from before he became your leader?

    [​IMG] Only a little - I was very young. He was...different. Prouder, yes, but harder, crueller, more driven. Really, I was terrified of him. We all were.

    [​IMG] When he came back, I almost didn't believe he was the same man. He wanted to protect, not destroy.

    Interesting.

    [​IMG] So, uh...what are we doing again?

    [​IMG] Well...(not that a savage like you should be trusted with this kind of sensitive information) Joshua's asked me to set out on a highly important mission. We need to pick up...let's see...

    [​IMG] ...lunchboxes. A walkie-talkie. A compass. And a medical kit.

    [​IMG] The fuck? Seriously, what the fuck is this about? LPer? Is there more to these quests, or am I really just wandering the map picking up junk?

    [​IMG] Well, er, let's see here. According to Josh Sawyer,

    [​IMG] "Core F:NV had some problems with quest designs and implementations that were extremely glitchy. Because Honest Hearts was developed on a relatively short schedule, I asked the quest designers to implement crit path quests that were very straightforward, with the idea that we would make the quests more elaborate if there were more time at the end. There really was never more time. Despite the long delay between DM and HH, the latter was out of testing over a month before the core game patch came out (which was necessary to release HH, OWB, and LR). Of the four DLCs, HH had the shortest development and testing cycle."

    [​IMG] "Obviously, that's not really an excuse."

    [​IMG]There. Does that make you feel better?

    [​IMG] Not really, no. It's bad enough that you've stuck me with this brutish tribal. Why, I can hardly stand to hear another word of his incessant whining!

    [​IMG] Sure is nice to explore all of the-

    [​IMG] WILLYOUSHUTUPFOLLOWSYOUFUCKINGSUBHUMANIMBECILETHISISNOTTHETIME-

    [​IMG] Look, just...get it done quickly, will you?

    The compass and medicine kit actually require a Repair/Medicine check or a bit of component-hunting. But it's still a very weak series of quests - and the biggest problem with the DLC. For all the work done filling in the themes, the adventure just lacks a proper backbone.

    [​IMG]

    As we wander about picking up the laughably simple tech, Follows brings a certain matter to our Courier's attention;

    [​IMG] It's the mountain Bighorners. Whole herd of them up on the cliffs there. Usually they're not too aggressive, but lately...hoo!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Oh, for the last time, you dumb savage, I don't...wait, you're saying there's a little adorable baby cow lost up in the mountains?

    [​IMG] ...Yes.

    [​IMG] Lost and frightened, away from its mother?

    [​IMG] Yes, but it's only a little thing. It's probably more important that you get those vital supplies to Daniel-

    [​IMG] Stand aside, Follows. I've got a baby cow to save.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Can't talk now, Joshua. I've got a baby cow to save!

    The Courier makes his way into the clifftops over the Dead Horses' camp. Where he finds;

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Daawww.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Daaawww!

    You have to continuously feed the calf banana yucca to get it to follow you over to the mother. If you can avoid the adult, hostile Bighorners (including the mother, oddly) you get an XP boost for completing the quest.

    Follows is happy, but not satisfied. He starts to tell us a story about his interest in 'civilisation'.

    [​IMG] Let me tell you a story. When I was a boy, a man came through the valley with one of the caravans. Big man, big moustache, carried a guitar. I asked him what he did for a living, and the interpreter told me he was a singer.

    [​IMG] 'What is that?' I asked. The man explained that he went from place to place and sang for people, who gave him food and shelter and care in return. I couldn't believe there was a place where a man could do that. I promised that one day I'd explore that world myself.

    That...doesn't really follow. Couldn't he just take up singing instead? Doesn't his tribe give him all of those things for free anyway?

    [​IMG] Maybe I could talk to Joshua about this. As a neutral party?

    [​IMG] You'd do that? Sure, sounds smart to me. He might not get so mad at you.

    Follows still seems pretty afraid of Joshua, despite all this talk about him having 'changed'. Let's go see Bandage-Face on his behalf.

    [​IMG] Follows-Chalk seems like he wants to see more of the world.

    [​IMG] I thought he might. It's been some time since I visited...civilised places. I don't have fond memories of them.

    Guess we all have our taboo places, eh, Josh?

    [​IMG] But I have always seen these places from the outside. I'd rather not influence him any more than I already do. Why don't you talk to him?

    [​IMG]

    Yeah, that wasn't so frightening, was it, Follows, you pussy?

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Joshua says he has a hard time being objective about the whole idea, and that I should give you advice.

    [​IMG] He said that? Well, I guess you have been out there more recently than he has. So...what's your advice?

    [​IMG] Civilisation isn't perfect, but neither is tribal life. You should go out and see it for yourself.

    After all, we'll need someone to polish our shoes back in New Vegas.

    [​IMG] Really, you think so? Hoo! I'm going to do it. After all this is over, I'm going to explore civilisation!

    Right, enough pissing about. Let's go see Daniel and give him his pre-war junk.

    [​IMG]

    As we approach the gorge where the Sorrows, the other friendly tribe in Zion, dwell, we're approached once again by a weird-looking baldie.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]Waking Cloud is my name. I am midwife. It sounds ill-omened, no? 'Midwife to Sorrows'.

    [​IMG] Who is the Father in the Cave?

    [​IMG]Have you not heard of the God of the New Canaanites? He is our protector and our judge. He helped our ancestors find their place here in Zion.

    [​IMG]He gave us many gifts, but we are not to seek him out. His caves are forbidden to us. Those who seek them out are taken from us.

    [​IMG] (Theology) That doesn't sound like what I've heard about the New Canaanites...

    [​IMG]Perhaps you do not fully understand. I have seen the Father's images. His holy bride and holy son were given unto the world to save it. They dwelt in the caverns of the mountains, mountains which can still be seen today.

    [​IMG]The people sinned against him, and were punished with the End That Came In Fire and the loss of the holy tongue. Only the New Canaanites were spared.

    So between this garbled gibberish and Joshua's teaching them to put their enemies' heads on spikes, it appears the missionary work's going well. Let's track down Daniel.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]The Sorrows will mourn your friends, too. They mourn everyone, even the White Legs. They have sensitive souls. Innocent, if there is such a thing.

    [​IMG]In spite of what's happened, I hope that Joshua and I can help you out of here. But, to be frank, we need your help too.

    [​IMG]The White Legs have always fought with us, and with Joshua returning, Caesar has motivated them to stamp out the New Canaanites entirely.

    [​IMG]That means the tribes we work with, too. It's already hap - I just want to prevent something terrible from happening to the Sorrows.

    [​IMG]But the White Legs can't follow us east, not onto the Grand Staircase. They don't know how to live off the land. We head there, we can find some safety.

    This point keeps arising, and I think it's meant at least in part to make the player feel some modicum of sympathy for the White Legs; the idea that they only raid and murder because they don't know how to live off the land - they're essentially dumb scavengers who don't know any better.

    Seeing as they're quite capable of firing guns, wearing ornaments and warpaint and operating fiery sword things, I'm not sure how much I can buy into that. But hey.

    [​IMG]I'll shoot dead any White Leg that tries to creep into this camp, but it's only to protect the Sorrows. The Lord helps those who help themselves, but the Sorrows don't know how. Joshua and I do. Since I got them into this mess, I need to get them out.

    [​IMG]The New Canaanites interfered in their lives. We did that, and we've done it before, with others. Always with good intentions, but things go wrong. When that happens, we can't just abandon them, let them die at the hands of New Canaan's enemies.

    [​IMG] Joshua's come up with a reasonable alternative. Why not help them fight?

    [​IMG]Joshua doesn't just want to fight the White Legs. He wants to annihilate them. The stakes are too high for their tribe.

    [​IMG]Hurting them won't dissuade them. If they can't join the Legion, they'll die out in a generation. They've never learnt how to survive. Food preservation, tanning, even basic hunting and cooking seem beyond them. They only survive by scavenging and raiding, but that won't last.

    For fuck's sake, Daniel, if they can shoot me in the face they can shoot a tasty gecko in the face. How can any primitive society not know how to hunt?

    [​IMG]They'll only stop if Joshua and the Dead Horses can kill their war chief and their entire war band. That's exactly what he intends to do.

    And there's the DLC's main choice; help Joshua wipe out the White Legs, or help Daniel flee with the Sorrows. I've read players who've treated it as 'war/peace' and, therefore, Joshua=bad/Daniel=good', but that's ignoring the fairly important point that Daniel, who is only shown to be striving to do what's right, is actually a pretty big stealth-arsehole of a character.

    But more on that later. Let's ask him about the Father in the Caves.

    [​IMG]Father in the? Oh, right. He's some spirit the Sorrows used to believe in, watched over them from the caves in the valley. I think as more of them learn the teachings of the New Canaanites, they'll lose their old superstitions.

    [​IMG] Uh...you might want to have a chat with them. They think your Lord and their Father are the same.

    [​IMG]Oh. Ah. Of course, how stupid of me. They probably also think Mary is the mother and Jesus is the child.

    [​IMG]No wonder they picked up on things so easily. I guess it just goes to show how difficult it is to communicate things sometimes.

    Well, that's just...yeah.

    As a reward for being the world's worst least effective missionary, we hand Daniel over the pre-war tech.

    [​IMG]Well, I'll be. I was starting to lose hope we'd get any of this, let alone all of it. Tribals are smart...but, well, they're ignorant.

    [​IMG]Letting go of a taboo is difficult for them, so I knew it would have to be one of us. Turns out all it took was a Gentile. Or...uh...no offence.

    [​IMG]These supplies are a godsend, but if we're going to evacuate Zion without attracting more attention, I need you to go back into the valley.

    ...of course you do. Bastard.

    Daniel requests a map of the Grand Staircase, some scouting around to see if the White Legs are nearby, and that the Courier checks out the eastern roads. Yippee.

    But before we can step back out into the valley, Follows requests our attention:

    [​IMG]Well, here I part ways. I'm needed back at the Dead Horses' camp - maybe I'll see you there sometime.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Typical. Just when I get a useful minion...

    [​IMG] Hey, it's not my fault! And what's this 'minion' stuff? Dahs eet - see you about, 'civilised' man.

    [​IMG] Wait! Come back! Slave!

    [​IMG] C-c-come back, Follows. Please, come back.






    [​IMG] :(
     
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  13. lightbane Arcane

    lightbane
    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2008
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    Location:
    Neverwhere
    [​IMG]

    :lol: :lol: Something more dangerous than armored mudcrabs: Ninja radscorpions!!
     
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  14. Crooked Bee wide-wandering bee Patron

    Crooked Bee
    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2010
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    Codex 2013 Codex 2014 PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire MCA Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 BattleTech Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire
    :lol:

    Indeed.
     
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  15. anus_pounder Arcane

    anus_pounder
    Joined:
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    Location:
    Yiffing in Hell
    :love: I don't theres any problem in getting down. What really made me rage was getting up to those high spots.
     
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  16. Peter Arcane

    Peter
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    Jun 11, 2009
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    1,570
    Enjoying this a whole lot. Nice balance of lulziness and serious stuff in your commentary.
     
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  17. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    grotsnik
    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2010
    Messages:
    1,664
    Thanks, everyone - I'm still trying to get the balance between screens/text right. I don't think LPs of FP shit work well with too many screens - it's not as if the reader gets to see the player strategy, and with so much combat you're going to have to fast-forward through some of it anyway.

    Anyway; our hero is about to set off once again into the canyons with a new companion. But before he does, he pops into one of the Sorrows' caves and is greeted by the familiar, sweet stink of delicious narcotics.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] What? I don't know what visions of truth means.

    [​IMG] Seek medicine plant! Return with Sacred Datura Root! Receive visions of truth, they guide you!

    Uh-huh.

    In what can only be a hilarious act of revenge directed at fans of the quest marker, the Pip-Boy map seems to mark out three spots on the map somewhere to the north of the cave (i.e., an insurmountable cliff) but the datura roots can actually be found all over the landscape, including on the bodies of fallen White Legs. So there's no rush; we can pick them up as we complete other quests.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] I...had a tribal companion once, long ago. His name was Follows, and no matter how hard you try to please me, you can never live up to his legacy.

    [​IMG]Neh?

    [​IMG] Just...come along.

    I can understand why they make you switch companions halfway through; the idea's presumably that you get a better sense of both tribes and feel torn between them for the final act. But it is a little irritating, particularly because Waking Cloud doesn't really have much in the way of personality.

    As we prepare to exit the canyon, we run into someone unexpected-

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG] Remember, O Lord, the children of Edom in the day of Jerusalem who said 'Raze it, raze it to its very foundations.'

    [​IMG]O daughter of Babylon, who art to be destroyed. Happy shall he be, that rewardeth thee as thou hast served us.

    Interestingly enough, Joshua's voice-actor can also be seen in The Dark Knight as the cop who gets tricked by the Joker into opening his jail cell. And, er, as the boss alien in Mass Effect 2 that yells slogans at you while you're fighting it.

    [​IMG]Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.

    [​IMG]Do you know what it means?

    [​IMG]You don't want to leave Zion. You'd rather kill every last one of the White Legs.

    [​IMG]Given those two choices, yes. In the best of all possible worlds, they'd just leave us alone. But they won't.

    [​IMG]I don't enjoy killing, but when done righteously, it's just a chore, like any other. Practiced hands make for short work. And the good Lord knows there's much to be done here.

    [​IMG]Why are you talking to me about it?

    [​IMG]Daniel does not yet see things the way we do. He is the John to our Matthew and Mark. When you have a moment, speak with him.

    Now that we're into the second half of the DLC, we get some additional conversation options with Joshua.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]You are kind to offer, but no, there's nothing you can do. We don't use chems, but I learnt long ago that I'm immune to their effects.

    What you should do is, run it under a cold tap.

    [​IMG]It never stops burning. My skin. Every day I have to unwind the bandages and add fresh ones.

    [​IMG]Exposing my body to the air is like living through it again. But it's better to be clean than comfortable.

    [​IMG]Were you always with the New Canaanites?

    [​IMG]I was born in Ogden, what people came to call New Canaan. Things were more peaceful when I was growing up.

    [​IMG]When I was a young man, I went out into the world to do missionary work as all New Canaanites do.

    [​IMG]I travelled along the Long 15 and followed 89 south into Arizona. Along the way, I met two men from a group called the Followers of the Apocalypse.

    [​IMG]Edward Sallow and Bill Calhoun. They came to teach the tribes. Calhoun was a good man. Edward was the one who got us into trouble along the road.

    [​IMG]Was one of those men Caesar?

    Yeah, Courier. Clearly it was Calhoun, you fucking schmuck.

    [​IMG]Back then he was just Edward. Smart man. Young, but we all were. We thought we could just hike into the Grand Canyon and talk to Blackfoots.

    [​IMG]We did, and the Blackfoots were friendly at first, but eventually...I've thought back to that day many times. The rest is history, assuming Edward hasn't changed it.

    [​IMG]This way lies the path to hell. Edw-Caesar needed me to translate. Translation became giving orders. Giving orders became leading in battle.

    [​IMG]Leading in battle became training, punishing, terrorising. A series of small mistakes before a great fall.

    [​IMG]And I stayed in that darkness until after Hoover Dam. After I failed Caesar and he had me burnt alive, thrown into the Grand Canyon.

    [​IMG]I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me. I fell into that dark chasm, but the flame burned on and on.

    Note to self: should I ever happen to throw any NCR Generals off Hoover Dam...shoot them in the head on the way down.

    Next we ask Joshua about Caesar.

    [​IMG]Love the sinner, hate the sin. With Caesar, it's often very difficult to see through all of that sin to the person inside.

    [​IMG]We were both lucky that NCR's supply lines and land routes north of Mojave Outpost were destroyed before the Battle of Hoover Dam. Something bad happened near Death Valley, at a place called the Divide. NCR couldn't cut across any more and it slowed down their reinforcements.

    [​IMG]Terrible storms ripped entire companies apart before they even got to Nevada soil. The aftermath of Hoover Dam could have been even worse for Caesar.

    [​IMG]What's at The Divide?

    [​IMG]I don't know for certain, and I don't think NCR knows either. Whatever happened at the Divide was too much for them to handle. Our frumentarii told us what they saw. Only fools and madmen would venture into a place like that. All roads wind down to the same spot, the grave.

    [​IMG]

    A landscape that's become a vast, raw wound, an endless reminder of the horrors of the past. Where have we heard tha-

    [​IMG]

    Oh, right.

    As we set out, with Waking Cloud in tow, we encounter more of Zion's feeble wildlife. Giant Ants, Geckos, Wild Dogs, shiiii-

    [​IMG]

    Our first task for Daniel is to pick up a map of the Grand Staircase. The quest marker clearly indicates that it can be found in one of the forbidden Caves of the Father where nobody has ever set foot, so on this reliable information, we head straight there.

    Waking Cloud doesn't like it much.

    [​IMG]We should not be here! This place...it belongs to the Father in the Caves! We must not profane it with our touch!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]I understand. I respect your beliefs, but we still need to search the caves.

    The perfect response. I respect your beliefs, but we're going to ignore them anyway.

    [​IMG]I understand. I would prefer to leave as soon as possible, though.

    Hidden behind bear-traps and closed doors, we find a small, makeshift shelter in the centre of the cave. The maps, abandoned guns...and a terminal. It tells the story of a man by the name of Randall Clark, who lost his wife and son to the falling bombs of the apocalypse. In time, as the radiation levels dropped, he learnt to live off the land, detailing the new types of animal that began to appear. He watched a family of Mexicans flourish, down in the hills - then continued to watch as they were ambushed and eaten by a large party of dwellers from Vault 22. In retaliation, Clark hunted the vault dwellers, and butchered them, one by one. He had a new wife, and a new child; they died. Clark himself began to dream of dying, committing suicide, but could never bring himself to let go. Finally, he encounters a group of wandering children - the ancestors of the Sorrows.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    The diary of the Father. Not a god...just a man who watched the world burn, and watched it rise again from the ashes, but never joined the new world when it came. And so he passed into myth, even after death, becoming something that was greater and more terrible than he would ever have wanted to be.

    No, I don't know why a survivalist would set up a computer terminal in a cave and successfully get it to run for the next few centuries, instead of just writing down his thoughts on a sheet of paper. I'm not even sure I can remember what Fallout 3's excuse was for any of the terminals still functioning. Anyway, there are five diary terminals scattered around Zion caves; you can find Clark's full story (which is actually pretty damn touching overall, for a bit of in-game lore fiction) here:

    http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Randall_Clark_terminal_entries

    Anyway, our next stop is to the eastern road, to check it's clear for Daniel's evacuation. Naturally, it's not.

    [​IMG]

    At this point, you can either tackle the Yao Guai in combat or head down into a nearby cave to blow them up.

    [​IMG]

    The problem is, they're just so damn easy to kill. Seriously, I have no more shooter ability or co-ordination than an old lady who's had three strokes, but there's like, three of them.

    On to the next astoundingly unepic task!

    [​IMG]

    Number one; we either wipe out a White Legs encampment, or stealth into the camp and steal their totems to frighten them off (for...some reason). Waking Cloud, in a move presumably intended to represent her 'innocence' is geared towards stealth and gives you a bonus to your own.

    [​IMG]

    Mind you, she's not so innocent as to be unable to punch a man's head right off.

    The final task is a bit puzzling; you're supposed to either kill the White Legs who are laying traps around the canyons, or simply disarm the traps yourself without having to kill any of them; however, if you've already visited the location (an Ant Mound) where the quest takes place, you spawn on top of the White Legs, effectively making the choice for you.

    Afterwards, we have a bit of a chat with Waking Cloud. Does she have a family?

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]When we learnt that Salt-Upon-Wounds and the White Legs had defiled Zion with their presence, Daniel ordered the children, the old and the sick evacuated from the camp.

    [​IMG]My husband volunteered to lead the hunters that went with them for protection.

    [​IMG]I try not to worry about them, but we have had no news for so long, and Daniel seems sad when I ask him about it. Sad...and a little frightened.

    Well, that's never a good sign, is it?

    [​IMG]I could talk to him, maybe he'll open up to me about it.

    [​IMG]Perhaps he will. Sometimes I feel he thinks he must protect me. If he has news, I would know of it.

    All right, let's have a word with Daniel.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]Tell me about Waking Cloud's family.

    [​IMG]What...uh...what do you want to know about it, exactly? I'm sure she could tell you better than I.

    [​IMG]Did you help her family leave Zion?

    [​IMG]I...did.

    [​IMG]What's the matter? Did something happen?

    [​IMG]Her three children are safe. They made it north weeks ago and met up with New Canaanites heading east.

    [​IMG]Her husband didn't make it. He died protecting their children from a White Legs attack.

    [​IMG]Do not tell Waking Cloud. She is one of the only Sorrows who can communicate easily with us and her tribe needs her to be strong right now.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]It's her husband! Don't you think she has a right to know?

    [​IMG]To every thing, there is a season. Who are you or I to put this heavy burden on her now?

    [​IMG]You're the New Canaanite who's supposed to lead these people, not hide things from them.

    [​IMG]I know. You're right. I shouldn't have hidden it from her in the first place. We just...can't fail here again.

    [​IMG]Zion can't become the next New Canaan. The Sorrows don't deserve that. They don't deserve any of this.

    Now this is why Daniel's an arsehole.

    This little quest is, pretty obviously, intended to parallel the other companion quest with Follows and Joshua; and the difference that comes out between the two New Canaanites is that Daniel not only believes his tribals are children; he wants them to remain children. What was it he said when we first met him?

    [​IMG]They have sensitive souls. Innocent, if there is such a thing.

    He actually doesn't seem to have any respect for the tribals he cares so much about; they're 'ignorant', they don't know how to protect themselves, their superstitions are silly - and yet he's enraptured by their innocence.

    Randall Clark felt the same way; but he still taught them to protect themselves, to fight back against aggressors. He understood that all innocence must, in time, be lost. Daniel wants to keep them in their state of innocence, and for that he's prepared to lead them out of their home, away from an immediate threat and towards other unknown threats - and to keep the truth from a wife about her husband's death. He wants to keep them in a prelapsarian state in a world that's decidedly fallen.

    And yet he's perfectly prepared to alter their existence in a manner that doesn't happen to offend his personal sensibilities - such as encouraging them to abandon their Father in the Caves 'superstitions' in favour of Christ. He's happy to interfere in a woman's business, then argue against undoing the damage by claiming that 'every thing has its season' - in short, he's a well-meaning but thoughtless hypocrite.

    Yeah, fuck you, Daniel. Let's tell Waking Cloud.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]About your husband...I'm afraid he was killed by White Legs during the evacuation.

    [​IMG]What? No! You must be mistaken. Daniel would have told me.

    [​IMG]I'm afraid so. Daniel kept it from you because he thought the grief might distract you.

    [​IMG]How...how dare he? What gives him the right? I thought Daniel was my friend, but he cares nothing for the Sorrows!

    [​IMG]

    Oh, hell. Grief might not distract her, but a burning desire to convince her fellow tribals to rise up and horribly butcher Daniel just might.

    [​IMG]He was only doing what he thought was best for the tribe. It wasn't an easy choice for him.

    [​IMG]Perhaps...I will have to have a very long talk with Daniel once all of this is over. Thank you for telling me this truth.

    Anyway, before we tell Daniel we're ready to evacuate Zion, we take our shaman his Datura Root. He tells us to drink it.

    [​IMG]

    Well, that doesn't sound too hard - woah.

    [​IMG]

    Trippin' motherfuckin' balls.

    [​IMG]

    The drug-induced hallucination looks a bit uninspired in the screenshots, but it does do movement rather well; everything seems to be shifting a little too fast, a little too jerkily, to be reality. I award it two glo-sticks out of five.

    [​IMG]

    We come across the remains of the Vault 22 expedition; and a terrified message, warning of an unstoppable phantom that lurked in the hills, a monstrous spectre of death that was murdering them, one by one.

    Bastards got what was coming to them.

    [​IMG]

    As we approach She's lair...we run into a little trouble.

    And then a lot of trouble.

    [​IMG]

    Once we've wounded She sufficiently, she splits into several forms. This basically equates to lots of bright fiery mess all over the screen, and shooting at it until it stops moving.

    [​IMG]

    All done; let's see what the shaman has to give us.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]How the fuck was that a 'vision of truth', you bastard? All I did was fight a fiery mythic fucking ghost bear!

    [​IMG] No? Consider. Where might you have seen such a unique creature before? In the past, perhaps...in another life?

    [​IMG]Well, I...wait! Something's coming back to me now! But it's...from far away...a distant echo...

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]Begins to see. Every game that comes, carries the echo of the game that came before it. Can never truly be rid of the past, the glorious and the disastrous. Can never just...begin again. Wipe the slate clean. Press 'reset'. Can't be done.

    [​IMG]What was...did you hear something?

    [​IMG]Visions of truth are at an end. Will you learn from truth? Maybe yes, maybe no. Only for you to decide.

    [​IMG]Here. Take gift, to remind you of visions. Or to sell to curio trader. Either way, says much about you.

    Troubled by his vision, the Courier seeks out Daniel. It's time to decide.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]That's assuming Joshua won't try to stop me. And that he hasn't talked you into fighting the White Legs despite what I've said.

    [​IMG] Don't worry, I won't hold it against you. You're a...an outsider. Fighting seems like the practical solution. But there's more than that at stake.

    [​IMG]

    Well, that's it. Should our hero help commit an act of genocide against the White Legs, or should he help the Sorrows evacuate Zion?
     
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  18. lightbane Arcane

    lightbane
    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2008
    Messages:
    6,682
    Location:
    Neverwhere
    Tell that to DA2. It managed to shit over everything that made DA1 a tolerable game, a really, really terrible game that's not even a true sequel.

    I vote for killing these savages, if you meet an enemy, you must destroy it, not run away like a coward.
     
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  19. anus_pounder Arcane

    anus_pounder
    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2010
    Messages:
    5,972
    Location:
    Yiffing in Hell
    Fight the White Legs. Watch as Joshua does all the hard work for you!

    (seriously, his pistol is fucking OP versus anything not you)
     
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  20. Kz3r0 Arcane

    Kz3r0
    Joined:
    May 28, 2008
    Messages:
    22,843
    Of course. :obviously:
     
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  21. Peter Arcane

    Peter
    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2009
    Messages:
    1,570
    Is the DLC really short or are you just cutting the FedEx quests? How long is it?

    also, another vote for genocide. :bounce:
     
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  22. grotsnik Prestigious Gentleman Arcane

    grotsnik
    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2010
    Messages:
    1,664
    I'm pretty much whizzing through the quests, but I think I've at least mentioned all the ones that exist - the crit quests just aren't filled out at all, sadly, so it'd very much be 'screenshot of entering hut' 'screenshot of shooting monsters in hut' 'screenshot of finding lunchbox' 'screenshot of entering another hut' 'screenshot of monster falling to pieces' 'screenshot of finding doctor's bag'. There's still plenty of exploration, loot and combat dotted around the place, so you can definitely get a few hours out of it without trying too hard. But yeah, it definitely lacks a spine.
     
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  23. anus_pounder Arcane

    anus_pounder
    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2010
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    Location:
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    Are you going to LP any other DLC ? This is quality stuff, it would be terrible to end it so soon.
     
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  24. PlanHex Arcane Patron

    PlanHex
    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2007
    Messages:
    1,921
    Location:
    Copenhagen, Denmark
    Side with the hypocrite for the lulz
     
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  25. PlanHex Arcane Patron

    PlanHex
    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2007
    Messages:
    1,921
    Location:
    Copenhagen, Denmark
    Side with the hypocrite for the lulz
     
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