The Mass Effect 3/BioWare Thread

I don't understand....most of these ARE boring old white guys that wrote shit...King: 'Hey let's write about about a possessed garlic crusher!'; Martin: 'Hey let's write about more rape. I'm a poor fantasy nerd that needs something to fap to!' etc. Having Salvatore there is a masterstroke as they all are on his level at best(with a couple exceptions).

What's your point?

 

They are way more intelligent than anyone who posts here on the Codex. And definitely, definitely more than fucking Jennifer Hepler.

 

It's just a copypaste from Iron Tower forums. I supposed people would find it amusing.

I have actually not read most of those authors, except Lovecraft.

EDIT: That said, I think the Hepler hate machine is really going overboard. Yes, I posted a funny pic related to Hepler, but I honestly don't feel in any way about her.

 

Because Gaydar was already bashed to to hell and back?
Well, then suggest another eaware hack to make fun of.

 

It's true. Jordan was a shit writer.
And Phillip Pullman, ehhh, i haven't read him so don't get me wrong, i got bad vibes (atheism notwithstanding). And i have the littlest axe in the world to grind with Moorcock regarding his "characters" and "worldbuilding". And Salvatore... do you see the FR label on that book? Yeah.

 

By the way. Why is Gaider bashed so much? Didn't the guy write the half-decent Bioware stuff previous to EA?

 

A broken clock is still right twice a day. Doesn't make it a useful clock.

 

Years ago when I was a scout, we went on summer camp. One of the things we had in our backpack was some sort of canned paté. After trekking the entire day, eating that paté on rye bread was one of the most delicious things I had tasted.

So naturally when I got back home, I found the same canned paté in a supermarket. I bought a can, went home and put some on rye bread. It tasted goddamn awful.

Just goes to show a starving man will find shit material delicious.

The baldur's gate games we found so compelling were released during a time where noone else were doing RPGs at all. Just RTS'es, FPS'es and a few adventure games.

 

While I have confidence in my ability to write better than Bioware's staff, I fear that if I was to join a video game development company as a writer, my talents would be crushed under the weight of the publisher's demands.

 

What you really meant to say

Ok, I think I've used up my allotment of Jennifer is Fat

 

You're right. Don't bother. He couldn't read "Paradise Lost" correctly so he wrote a dumbed down fantasy version of what he did understand. With Pokémon in it.

That picture is good at pointing out insanely successful authors in science fiction, who actually wrote science fiction in general, not romances with fantastical themes.

But Bioware doesn't care about that audience. I find it odd to phrase it the way it's phrased, given how popular the latest cinematic treatment of LotR was. Surely that's a sizable success? Doesn't that show that you don't have to be "Twilight" to appeal to a broad audience? Or is she still pretending that Bioware's imitating literature in its videogames, not movies?

 

That post belongs to Howard and Clark Ashton Smith.

 

Well, on a related note, Crysis 2's plot was supposedly penned by Richard Morgan and Peter Watts, both pretty good s-f writers well above the typical pulp. And it was a fucking trainwreck.

 

Biowhores are trannies!

Actually I wouldn't count on that. Yes, most codexians are morons with delusions of grandeur, but I think you could find a handful who seriously rolled way down the right slope of the curve when it comes to intelligence and it's not just intelligence that makes a good writer. You need a decent deal of it, obviously, but genius IQ isn't strictly necessary in this trade and there are many other things that are more important and relatively few of them are innate.

With that I can't argue.

If life was a point-buy system, the retarded landwhale would have scrounged up enough for at least one major superpower*.



*) Pushing boundries of my contempt and making my faith in humankind sink even deeper than it already is, while admittedly impressive and definitely not a common ability, falls a bit short of that.

 

Because when bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle. As the saying goes.

Seems more a matter of intention. Tolkien may be iffy to some and King may be mediocre, if not ruthlessly bland, but I think its safe to assume they set out to do something honestly and well, and that it would be alien to them to claim they set out to emulate the concept of mass appeal let alone the type of mass appeal of sub-toilet-book-fiction like Rowling and Meyer. Bioware writing may simply be what it is because apparently even their senior writers believe they write what they write in the chief, if not sole, interest of sales figures.

 

I think you couldn't help it.

 

Didn't he write Irenicus?

And I actually specifically meant Hordes of the Underdark, HK-47. That stuff. I mean he wrote some awful stuff too. But his best is Bioware's best.

 

I don't really get the HotU love (well, maybe not love, but at least a dose of respect) around here. Sure it's better then the herpy derpy OC, but it's still a banal shit boring run-of-the-mill dungeon descent with a party of two characters (with several completely uninteresting npcs to choose from) on a bad fugly engine.

 

What did Hepler actually write in Bioware games? Does anybody knows?

 

Merrill?

 

I came up with this:

http://www.337.com/pages/175304/Jennifer Hepler