NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[hoopy]

Goons continue to discuss the finer aspects of Elder Scrolls and RPGs:

You know, playing Skyrim now, I think one of the only thing that annoys me about the voice acting is they made Redguards basically the whitest sounding characters in the game. I mean even the Nords have an accent.

Its just one of those ticks that's burns me. Oblivion was pretty much the only game that I could really craft a character that looked and (at least partially) sounded just like me. That's gone now and it sort of burns me.

At the same time, it's probably very reaffirming for someone who speaks with a "black" accent to their voice to hear people who sound like them in video games instead of everybody sounding like white people all the time.

If you're playing a fantasy game in a fantasy world, you don't like to feel like you're losing out on something based on picking a gender or race. It makes sense right up until the point where somebody wants to play a female Redguard Battlemage who kicks rear end with spells, only to discover that they're inherently limited in their strength and intelligence stats, you know?

Having fantasy race or gender affect usual stat ranges doesn't have to, and shouldn't, mean that playing as a female dwarf means you can never ever have the same strength stat as a male werewolf. But there's nothing wrong with a female dwarf character being required to train more or get more experience or whatever mechanic you choose in order to get the same strength as the male werewolf has.

I see your point, but I think the issue is that usually those starting stats or stat ranges use the often flimsy excuse of verisimilitude to reinforce both positive and negative stereotypes of genders and ethnicities; it's a way bigger deal in TES because "black people", "norse aryans", and "romans" are player character races. There's more theoretical harm done by that than the D&D approach of having the races with different stats be things like elves and dwarves, which at the very least are allegorical or analogous to real-world cultures and ethnicities rather than almost directly being them.

 

[Angthoron]

And they thought that having an entry fee would save them from retards...

 

[Grim Monk]

I'm unsure what to :/ think about this thread on the Escapist forums...

I want Obsidian to make the next Elder Scrolls game

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/ ... rolls-game[/quote]

 

[hoopy]

Wait... you enjoyed Fallout : NV more then Fallout 3...?
You've got to be kidding me! Bethesda took fallout three, and made it a game to be remembered, then as soon as Obsidian takes back over, they basicly just copy all the ideas from Fallout 3 with a few new added shit, oh now I can attach things to my guns, woop-de-fucking-do.

 

[Wyrmlord]

"So, you're an Argonian mage?" asked the Redguard, curious about the new prisoner before him.

Ignius Thrinn nodded. "Aye."

"And you're versed in the destructive arts, specifically... frost spells?" A smile crept into the corners of his mouth.

The large reptilian winced. He knew where this was going. "...Don't."

The gears had begun to turn.


"You're a wizard... a lizard, who's a wizard..."

"Please, don't." Thrinn pleaded. "I beg of you."

His protest fell on deaf ears.

"...A blizzard wizard lizard!"

It had been said, as it had been said by smartarses in every town and tavern Thrinn had ever visited. The camp erupted into laughter, guard and prisoner alike.

All the Argonian could do now was hope that the executioner worked in alphabetical race order.

Masterpiece.

 

[Luzur]

someone should register, and post how they all are very intellectual challenged individuals.

and add "go and fuck a dog" too.

 

[Awor Szurkrarz]

"So, you're an Argonian mage?" asked the Redguard, curious about the new prisoner before him.

Ignius Thrinn nodded. "Aye."

"And you're versed in the destructive arts, specifically... frost spells?" A smile crept into the corners of his mouth.

The large reptilian winced. He knew where this was going. "...Don't."

The gears had begun to turn.


"You're a wizard... a lizard, who's a wizard..."

"Please, don't." Thrinn pleaded. "I beg of you."

His protest fell on deaf ears.

"...A blizzard wizard lizard!"

It had been said, as it had been said by smartarses in every town and tavern Thrinn had ever visited. The camp erupted into laughter, guard and prisoner alike.

All the Argonian could do now was hope that the executioner worked in alphabetical race order.

Masterpiece.

 

[hoopy]

I compared Eurogamer's reviews of Saints Row 3 and Modern Warfare 3.

You spend the first two acts out of three going through these motions. You steal cars, disrupt rival drug deals, deliver A to B, protect Character X while they do Y, escort the NPC to the marked spot. Tooling around in stolen cars, listening to rap, rock and eighties pop interspersed with comedy talk radio skits - we've been down this road too many times before.

Modern Warfare 3 is exactly the game you expect. It's conservative in every sense of the word, a paean to military superiority which never ventures far beyond gameplay parameters that were set in stone in 2007.

The game is adding little to the predictable template at this stage, and the clichés start to wear thin.

For the most part, however, Infinity Ward has done its usual ruthlessly efficient and highly polished job of retooling Hollywood trailer moments into interactive vignettes.

The biggest disappointment with Saints Row: The Third isn't that it gets anything terribly wrong, but that it doesn't do more to distinguish itself from the genre it so brazenly copied to begin with. [...] We get another game defined by its adherence to the GTA formula.

So while it's easy (and fair) to criticise Modern Warfare 3 for sticking so closely to a winning template once again, it's also good to be reminded that for all the ire that the series attracts, it's still a phenomenally well-tooled gameplay machine, and one that goes out of its way to please.

The most damning aspect of Saints Row: The Third is that where the all-important lulz are concerned, there's precious little here that you couldn't already do in Saints Row 2.

There are plenty who would love to see Call of Duty dragged through the mud for its lack of new ideas, but the game itself is too confidently constructed, too generous with its pleasures, to deserve any lasting vitriol.

Saints Row 3: 7/10
Modern Warfare 3: 8/10

Both reviews were written by the same person.

Actually, let's take a look at Destructoid too (same reviewer for both games).

So desperate is The Third to get to its explosive setpieces that it forgot to pace itself, and that leads to a game that shoots its load before players are even warmed up. Mission objectives aren't too varied...

The usual collection of roller-coaster moments is out in full force, with daring helicopter escapes, explosive war zones and chilling tours through ruined city streets presented with the usual class and polish that Infinity Ward brings to the table.

The main campaign can be cleared in a matter of hours. [...] Even worse, I fear the brevity of the campaign is a direct result of content being withheld so that the publisher can sell it digitally after the fact.

As always, the single-player mode is but a five-hour romp, but its length is more than enough to present a thrilling, adrenaline-pumping sequence of high-speed shootouts across a wide variety of locations around the world.

Saints Row 3: 7/10
Modern Warfare 3: 9.5/10

Saints Row 3 also gets criticized for things like QTEs, DLC and things eventually getting old (as they do in 99 % of video games). Fortunately Modern Warfare 3 does not have those problems.

In conclusion, I trust and respect the opinions of professional video game reviewers.

 

[sgc_meltdown]

http://www.reddit.com/r/skyrim/comments ... _bethesda/

You're doing great. Don't sell out. You are getting a lot of rep with Skyrim out, with numbers that are astronomical compared to past games, but I think I speak for all your fans when I say that we would rather wait 5 years between games and be inspired by each new world, rather than have you go down the path of Call of Duty and others in the new game every year mentality. If you do go that way, do it with Fallout. You are one of the few gaming companies that deserves the respect of the players. Lets keep it that way.

Sincerely, An avid Elder Scrolls fan.

I love how glitches in Bethesta games work. Seriously, I was getting pounded by a snow bear, when all of a sudden a horse comes out of the ground and propels the bear into the air, and then to death upon impact to the ground.

AMAZING.

The complexity of programs like this makes it flatout impossible to deliver such a game glitchless.

They could fix it afterwards but if the community does it and the next Fallout or TES comes sooner or bigger, it's a good deal, don't you think?

don't bother reading the rest of the comments half of it is all electronic arts sux bethesda rulez no wait they r both kool etc

http://www.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments ... kyrim_yet/

Every time I play Skyrim something out of the ordinary happens and for the most part it is pretty neat, but earlier I was riding around Riften than a dragon started circling overhead. Seeing this I quickly rode my horse(whom I named Artemis) near the gates of the city, dismounted, and headed off to face the dragon. I love my horse and I just don't want it to become hurt so I normally try to keep it safe, anyways.

I start to battle this dragon, and it decides not to be one of the pushovers, and I got a fight on my hands. I am popping resistance potions, using magicka and dodging/blocking the best I can, but than I see it. On the corner of the right of my screen, my horse shows up and is like "NOPE! NO ONE KILLS MY MILK DRINKER" (I like to imagine he talks in shout, because he is a boss) and starts to kick the dragon. At this point I am like holy shit, my horse came to my aid, but that is when it happened. Three more horses showed up and started helping me with the dragon, than we as a group of five brought the dragon down!

At this point I realized that everything I have heard about the horse being amazing was multiplied by infinity because not only did Artemis saved me, he organized a battalion of horses to come with him.

roleplaying these days isn't making meaningful choices based on playstyle
it is now making a story to justify everything you see on screen

 

[MetalCraze]

Wait... you enjoyed Fallout : NV more then Fallout 3...?
You've got to be kidding me! Bethesda took fallout three, and made it a game to be remembered, then as soon as Obsidian takes back over, they basicly just copy all the ideas from Fallout 3 with a few new added shit, oh now I can attach things to my guns, woop-de-fucking-do.

That's exactly what Obsidian did. They also tried to beat Bethesda when it comes to raping Fallout's lore and including as much retarded stuff into the game as possible but I'd say they are pretty equal

Pretty ironic how Escapist member is more objective than Obsidian fanboy squad here (ZOMG they make* shit games that are no different from AAAs except they don't sell - they are truly underground, counterculture and hardcore!)

* copy

 

[hoopy]

Bethesda took Fallout 3... from the people who developed the first two Fallouts. They didn't invent the series either.

It's nonsensical to talk about "copying" when Obsidian was using the same engine to make a game set in the same universe. Should they have completely reimagined the whole Fallout setting? Oh, but I guess they would have been raping the lore then... except they already did that by "copying" earlier Fallout games. Looks like they just can't win.

 

[DraQ]

Its just one of those ticks that's burns me. Oblivion was pretty much the only game that I could really craft a character that looked and (at least partially) sounded just like me. That's gone now and it sort of burns me.

Oh man! Oh god!

 

[gromit]

Like one of you wouldn't have lit Bethesda on fire if all of the white people had black people voices.

 

[Xor]

Skywayisms

You just keep doing your thing, man.

Its just one of those ticks that's burns me. Oblivion was pretty much the only game that I could really craft a character that looked and (at least partially) sounded just like me. That's gone now and it sort of burns me.

Oh man! Oh god!

Some people are just really ugly, I guess.

 

[sgc_meltdown]

http://www.reddit.com/r/gamernews/comme ... l_soon_be/

I like the giant item display on the right. It gives your stuff weight. Small icons on a grid might be more convenient, but superficial elements like giant fully-modeled carrots can really help the world breath. Even my spells being given a place to wobble around in the menu seems to add something substantial to them.

somewhere a veteran ui designer read this and started drinking heavily

 

[DraQ]

http://www.reddit.com/r/gamernews/comments/mem5d/pc_skyrim_is_a_frustrating_mess_and_will_soon_be/

I like the giant item display on the right. It gives your stuff weight. Small icons on a grid might be more convenient, but superficial elements like giant fully-modeled carrots can really help the world breath. Even my spells being given a place to wobble around in the menu seems to add something substantial to them.

somewhere a veteran ui designer read this and started drinking heavily

Sounds like codexian actually.









At least that's what I prefer to think.

 

[The King of Comedy]

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/ ... -Dovahkiin

Not sure if this hasn't been posted already.

 

[Clockwork Knight]

I thought about the kid being mocked to hell when he gets to school, but then again I doubt the kids would give two shits about a game created when they were newborns.

 

[Stinger]

I dunno, I'd probably diss someone as a kid if their name was Terminator.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

I picture a scene where the kid, now an adult, asks his parents about the story behind his name. Hilarity ensues.

 

[Stinger]

You think that kid's going to wait until he's grown up before he calls out his parents on their bullshit?

I'd be doing it as soon as I could talk.

 

[I.C. Wiener]

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/7.323579-Say-Hello-to-Baby-Dovahkiin

Not sure if this hasn't been posted already.

Not as bad as all the baby Sephiroths, but still... SIDS would be merciful.

 

[Luzur]

he prob grow up to a LARP'er and try to shout at people.

FOOSH-ROO

 

[sgc_meltdown]

http://www.fallout3nexus.com/downloads/ ... p?id=16085

Falloutcraft - Minecraft in Fallout

Well it first started out as an idea, I was introduced to Minecraft and was intrigued by the online videos. So I went ahead and tried Classic out and fell in love with it. I purchased the game and continue to play it daily. By that time I was already way into Fallout and I figured... What if I put my favourite games together to create some sort of hybrid? Well after a lot of help from friends and my boyfriend I became quite a budding modder. I started out making different blocks of Minecraft and it just went on from there.
The idea of this really is to build your creations in the Fallout world.

More features will be added as this is more of a test phase to show my work so far.

So far there is:
- 45 Minecraft Blocks (Dirt,Cobblestone,Chest's etc)
- Working Crafting Bench (Craft yourself new tools/weapons!)
- Working Furnace (Smelt your own blocks and items!)
- Working Chests (Store all your gear in multiple, placeable chests!)
- Placeable Blocks (Whatever you harvest you can place again)
Note: You must be looking straight forward as seen in V3 video to place blocks
- Working Creeper Script for Npc's/Creatures
- Explodable TNT!
- Dozens of Crafting Recipes!
- Minecraft Radio! (Listen to C418's music in fallout!)
Note: This is not music from Minecraft OST Album
- Custom textures (Obviously!)
- New Items (Sticks, Diamonds, Clay, Bricks, Gold + Iron Bars and more)

http://www.fallout3nexus.com/downloads/ ... 504972.jpg
http://www.fallout3nexus.com/downloads/ ... 504973.jpg
http://www.fallout3nexus.com/downloads/ ... 504973.jpg
http://www.fallout3nexus.com/downloads/ ... 681197.jpg
http://www.fallout3nexus.com/downloads/ ... 504972.jpg

must-watch video
points of interest are 3:53 and then 6:45
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgJLeh7Q ... r_embedded

 

[Clockwork Knight]

http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/641695-p ... n/60615011

So many pages...about this

I read Jaesun's posts in his voice