NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[Lumpy]

http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/inde ... pic=510090
Oh, God. They are ASKING Bethesda to rip them off.

Also, what pure obliviousness in this thread: http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/inde ... pic=509374

Not to piss role player fanatics out there but, you can always role play a mage and sit your but for like 5 hours reading a book everyday, and using your magics just for "research" stuff, don't do ANY quests and stuff...you just want to pick ingredients, yes you see bandits running after you! then you kill those bandits because they would do the same if you do nothing, there, you have your pacific role playing stuff.

No seriously, it MAY be role playing but it's also A GAME, and like I and trainer343 (something like that) explained, games are associated with violence, always have, always will (I've taken your sentence trainer! lol).

 

[ixg]

No seriously, it MAY be role playing but it's also A GAME, and like I and trainer343 (something like that) explained, games are associated with violence, always have, always will (I've taken your sentence trainer! lol).

WTF....since when is game = violence?
I think it's obvious that the new TES crowd really is a bunch of Xbox kiddies who grew up on crappy FPS games.

 

[OverrideB1]

No seriously, it MAY be role playing but it's also A GAME, and like I and trainer343 (something like that) explained, games are associated with violence, always have, always will (I've taken your sentence trainer! lol).

Well that may be the single most depressing mindset I've ever seen at the ESF -- although it comes as no surprise to me. The Doomification of the ESF series is now assured since the Toddlets have finally taken over the asylum.

 

[Lumpy]

At least half the people posting in those threads are mentally sound.

EDIT: Fuck:

Situation: Peaceful Monk confronted by bullying bandits.


Choice: Let attacking bandits bully you.

Consequence: You are killed ignominiously on the roadside.

Choice: Run from attacking bandits.

Consequence: You are chased until you are either caught, outrun them, or some guards rescue you.

Choice: Fight the attacking bandits trying to bully you.

Consequence: Die fighting, OR defeat them, take their armour, sell it for money, give this money to the poor.

There's one single situation in "Oblivion". This alone proves that this is an RPG with choices and consequences.

So somnium in response to your statement "Two times nothing does not equal alot", if you want to get philosophical about it "zero" is still something, and you might not always get what you were expecting.

Either way, your assertion that "Oblivion" does not provide choice and consequence has been proved completely wrong.

Azrael
The Nord With The Sword

EDIT #2: This is so perfectly and deliciously moronic:

When it comes to choices, Oblivion/MW/DF have more of them then any other computer RPG that I can think of...
In the sense that we can;
stand on a hill, watching the sun set
go to this or that city
be an evil assasin or a vaillant knight
buy a house/horse
steal a horse
eat an apple ect ect...
of course this list can go on and on and on. You get my point.
I don't remember doing that with Icewind Dale or Neverwinter.

This is the kind of post you can't even make fun of - it's parodying itself.

 

[kingcomrade]

Azrael

Besides being a retard, what is with this name? It's like the most common and generic fantasy name ever.

 

[Drakron]

But he is a nord with a sword ... well that happen because all axes got blunt

 

[Mr Happy]

Also, what pure obliviousness in this thread: http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/inde ... pic=509374

That bothered me a bit, the guy asks for an alternative to violence in an "RPG" and people tell him to go play the sims.

 

[ixg]

Nord with a Sword must spend a long time deciding how to piss in the morning.

 

[kingcomrade]

Nord with a Sword must spend a long time deciding how to piss in the morning.

No, I'm pretty sure his only option is to do it sitting down.

 

[glasnost]

Also, what pure obliviousness in this thread: http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/inde ... pic=509374

That bothered me a bit, the guy asks for an alternative to violence in an "RPG" and people tell him to go play the sims.

I desperately want to play a dialogue/diplomacy/intrigue rpg with zero mandatory combat, but it seems like it's something that will never happen unless I make it myself.

 

[Blacklung]

Azrael

Besides being a retard, what is with this name? It's like the most common and generic fantasy name ever.

So is mine...but yeah. He seems like a bit of fool, doesn't he?

 

[Lord Chambers]

I haven't read the thread, but what Azrael posted is most definitely a satire of Oblivion's supposed role-playing opportunities.

 

[Lumpy]

I haven't read the thread, but what Azrael posted is most definitely a satire of Oblivion's supposed role-playing opportunities.

No. He really was serious.

 

[Lumpy]

Also, what pure obliviousness in this thread: http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/inde ... pic=509374

That bothered me a bit, the guy asks for an alternative to violence in an "RPG" and people tell him to go play the sims.

I desperately want to play a dialogue/diplomacy/intrigue rpg with zero mandatory combat, but it seems like it's something that will never happen unless I make it myself.

Or Vault Dweller: http://www.irontowerstudio.com/

 

[Elwro]

Proof of how awesome RAI is can be found right here.

Thanks. A great find! :D

 

[Top Hat]

Tips Top Hat. Greetings all.

Oddly enough, Bethesda have decided that making a game for the Illiterati isn't good enough. Now they've decided that their forum moderators need to have poor knowledge of English as well:

I'm sure they've thought of it. I know that as far as the Elder Scrolls has gone so far they have said that they want to make the best single-player experience possible, without compromizing to Multi. However if you go to the Zenimax site, there is mention of an MMO. But that's all there is, no mention of weather is has anything to do with Elderscrolls or not.

Thank you, Archeopterix! "BEST SINGEL-PLAYA XPERINECE EVAR!!!1ONE!!"

Exit

 

[Lord Chambers]

I haven't read the thread, but what Azrael posted is most definitely a satire of Oblivion's supposed role-playing opportunities.

No. He really was serious.

I found this impossible to believe, since dying and running away do not represent real choices, so I decided to read some of Azrael's posts. Jesus Christ Almighty, the gaming apocalypse is upon us.

In "Morrowind", you could not fight, but you're not going to complete the Main Quest and alot of side quests if you follow this path.

You can easily play the role of a peaceful monk in "Oblivion".

However, you meet the same problem when it comes to the Main Quest and other quests.

Here's your choice. Do them or don't do them.

YEAAAAAAAAAAAH YOU CAN CHOOSE NOT TO PLAY THE GAME, THEREFORE "OBLIVION" HAS CHOICES AND CONSEQUENCES. It makes sense. *punches wall near computer*

It took my fighter character alot longer to level up than it dit my Mage.

I'd say create your character logically. i.e. Strength and Endurance as favourite attributes, Blade as a major skill.

That's how the game was designed to be played, so I'd recommend that.

I've realized the reason this guy's gaming concepts piss me off so much is because he writes coherently. Thus I expect him to have some sort of coherent thought behind it all.

Actually the problem is probably with the PC that is playing the game.

Even the "uber computers" people build from themselves can get clogged up with all sorts issues from spyware and background programs running to people not clearing their caches.

You just need to be a little tidier with your computer, or perhaps turn down some of the settings so you're not taxing your system so much.

This should increase the smoothness of your game significantly and resolve dialogue issues.

And to think, you wanted to blame this on Bethesda?

Have you no...

No. I won't say it.

And he is really convinced he's got it figured out. I hope his mom regrets never aborting him.

I personally love to admire my character.

Look at all the people who swarm on the "post your character's picture here" threads.

[Mirrors] would be a great addition.

Especially for the hard core minority that see switching to the third person view as an obscene affront to their sense of realism in the game and find having to do so to look at their character as heretical as using fast travel.

He's a well-rounded forum goer. Not only unwilling to be critical of Bethesda, but loves to look at his character too.

Interesting outlander.

You talk much of the halcyon days of "Morrowind" yet you've never been to the "Morrowind Forums" to speak of your love for that game.

This is a trend popular amongst "Defenders of the Morrowind Faith".

They love the game alot...

Just not enough to be interested in posting in the Morrowind Forums.

Instead they come to the "Oblivion" Forums to tell people like me how the game could be better instead of writing the developers who actually created it.

Perhaps the Moderators should start cracking down on this sort of thing.

He also thinks critical speech should be curtailed.

Honestly, who cares?

It's optional.

I know you asked us not to remind ourselves of that fact, because it might hurt the feelings of those who are... (if I understand your post correctly) upset because they don't have a realistic method of fast travel available for them?

What were you expecting? A giant slug larvae with long legs?

If you were happy to accept something that "realistic" for "Morrowind" what's stopping you from creating your own "realistic" fast travel options?

You could pretend the Mage's Guild teleporters still work and only fast travel from inside towns with a Mage's Guild?

You could pretend Silt Striders are still functioning and that the beggars are actually the Silt Strider keepers therefore allowing you to fast travel with a clear consciounce everytime you select the option: "Have a coin beggar"?

"Walkers" used to tease "Fast Travellers", light heartedly calling them "soft core gamers".

You've taken something that started off as a tongue in cheek debate and turned it into a colossal waste of time.

In his mind, pretending is a fix for anything missing in the game. That is so frustrating a concept that I'm going to go now and pretend to punch myself in the groin and fall off my balcony.

 

[ixg]

The Awesome Brainwashing Powers of Bethesda!

 

[Levski 1912]

He also thinks critical speech should be curtailed.

Quick, get him a black shirt!

 

[Kendar]

I am speechless... This guy is awesome :

And if you really don't like killing things, well there's always "Myst" and "Barbie Horse Adventures" isn't there?

Do you want something like Bioware's "Knights Of The Old Republic" where your decisions to be good or evil affected the outcome of your "Main Quest"?

Not that Kotor was extraordinarily good, but he says that like if it was exactly the way not to go.

Making a choice in the game is easy.
Bethesda just assume you're not an idiot and are capable of making your own decisions.

Ngmf.

Also, you might be able to absorb 50% of an enemy's attacks, but that means if there's 2 of them, you're fighting a whole enemy again.

What ?

If it's any consolation you can dual wield a shield and a sword at the same time?

I won't bother quoting everything. This guy is such a idiot than no word could express it (exept his posts, that is).

 

[Thrawn05]

This is why we don't have custom avatars.

http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=514975

 

[Levski 1912]

This is why we don't have custom avatars.

http://www.elderscrolls.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=514975

Furriness ahoy!

 

[suleo]

eat an apple.

But what if it's a poisoned apple? Do you eat it then? Huh? Huh?

MSOT IMPORTANT CHOICE EVAR!!!111

 

[Lord Chambers]

This avatar made me giggle a bit.

 

[Data4]

If you could ask the Devs one question/make one request

Have fun!

-D4