NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[Clockwork Knight]

Probably the same guy who thought the elf archer in Dragon's Crown and Peacock from Skullgirls had the most realistic female body types in their games.

-

 

[Unkillable Cat]

Another random tidbit from a strategy guide from 1994, this one is from Lunar: The Silver Star:

Acknowledgements to Midway for getting the government involved in video games because of their ridiculously violent Mortal Kombat. Good going, boneheads!

 

[Kitchen Utensil]

 

[markec]

 

[markec]

 

[Beggar]

What games you remember where you can kill dogs?

 

[Catacombs]

What games you remember where you can kill dogs?

You can kill cats in GTA V

 

[Clockwork Knight]

Fallouts being the obvious ones.

You can kill wandering dogs in The Division 2. Normally pointless but at one point they were dropping rare ammo due to a bug so you can imagine the doggo genocide that followed.

The dogs in Modern Warfare too, but those are enemies.

 

[Goat]

What games you remember where you can kill dogs?

The Witcher, I think there was a quest where you needed to get some dog tallow.

 

[Alienman]

Pseudodogs are dogs ... I think?

 

[Sukhāvatī]

 

[markec]

 

[Unkillable Cat]

Wait, what?

President Bush recently expanded his new drug plan to include certain herbs and other ingredients of various magical formulae and potions commonly used in most fantasy lands. In addition to military support, Bush announced financial aid will be sent to rulers of all fantasy lands willing to provide local farmers with substitute crops: instead of growing the exotic herbs and spices used to boost Strength and other traits, for instance, they'll be encouraged to plant fields of oat bran, granola and wheat germ.

Marines are being sent to Sosaria to uproot hard-to-find fields of nightshade and mandrake root , while Deruvia's mushroom crops and the Great Underground Empire's popular Spenseweed are expected to suffer the same fate. A 100-acre Spenseweed plantation, discovered in a remote section of Quendor last week, was incinerated with the assistance of Nancy Reagan's pet dragons.

Already, some realms have announced support of Bush's new plan. Freebasing toadstool power was outlawed in Gwydion last week, the Oriental land of Khantun banned mind elixirs, and Flatheadia shut down every Flat head shop in the kingdom. Albion's Queen Gloriana even announced a number of notorious citizens will be required to change their names.

Meanwhile, the insidious "Herb Cartel" has stepped up its campaign to intimidate judges on the verge of reinstating extradition treaties with the USA. Calling themselves "The Teleportables," they have already Fireballed a pub in Skara Brae, Lightning Bolted the Bank of Zork, Sand Stormed every major castle in Phlan, MIBLed all the guards in Thalen, Cleeshed a prominent candidate in Aquitania's upcoming presidential election, Magic Missiled an orb factory in lower Landor, and cast Hold Person spells on the entire parliament of CRON.

 

[iZerw]

Can't find the kickstarter compilation thread. Please post a link to it.

 

[Semiurge]

What games you remember where you can kill dogs?

Some doglover must've created this mod

 

[Morpheus Kitami]

Someone put a lot of effort into those sprites. Although I'm not familiar with the mac version's sprites, are the cat's heads pasted on top of the dogs bodies or is the whole package new?

 

[Infinitron]

 

[Unkillable Cat]

Soon lots of old demos and shareware games will be gone forever.

Its not just that, there's quite a few games only on there, not to mention old gaming magazines. And if we weren't nerds with tunnel vision, tons of old magazines, books and other literature you can't find anywhere else. If IA gets fucked, a lot of things will likely be lost forever. All because they had to upload some crap that's still in print.

Yeah, the internet archive contains huge amounts of content that would otherwise be lost. Dead websites, removed articles/posts...

Modern copyright is an atrocity, this is just one more (really large) reason to oppose it.

Seeing this on the horizon, I decided to do something about it. I'm archiving a few things from there, but mostly for myself - If it interests me, I grab it.

One such thing are strategy guides, hintbooks and cluebooks for old games - these are normally hard to come by and there's not exactly great interest in reprinting them, let alone preserving them. So I found a stash of them over at the Archive and proceeded to download the lot. The total size was a little on the higher size, so I checked the list of files to be downloaded. One 10-gig zipfile popped out at me - the official strategy guide for the arcade game "Dungeons & Dragons - Shadows over Mystara".

Being both interested and curious I put it at the front of the download queue and check back on it two hours later. I open the zipfile and it's full of .tiff files - each page is 90 megabytes. So I unzip them to a folder and it's 18 gigs of image files. "That's nice, I'll just convert them into something smaller and be done with it."

Except eventually it finishes unzipping the files and I can finally look at the pages.



It's the Japanese version of the guide. In GRORIUS URTRA-HIGH RESORUTION!

My hard drive breathes a sigh of relief as it flushes down a 30-gig turd.

So yeah, plenty of cool stuff on the Internet Archive - but also large clumps of autism, it seems.

 

[Black]

All my salutes go to people who archive terabytes of tentacle art and porn. You're the real mvps.

 

[Matalarata]

the official strategy guide for the arcade game "Dungeons & Dragons - Shadows over Mystara".

Ah! Fortunately I know the location of every single secret passage and magic item. I memorized all the different routes and the exact location where spells are replenished (different for each character). Same with the prequel, Tower of Doom.

If only I could memorize the Dwarf special loot table for chests (in SoM dorfs can loot locked chests twice) and the Thief pickpocket table, my knoweledge of that particular game would be perfect!

Spoiler

I probably wasted enough money on the coin-op in the nineties to afford a hundred or so strategy guides

 

[Morpheus Kitami]

Seeing this on the horizon, I decided to do something about it. I'm archiving a few things from there, but mostly for myself - If it interests me, I grab it.

One such thing are strategy guides, hintbooks and cluebooks for old games - these are normally hard to come by and there's not exactly great interest in reprinting them, let alone preserving them. So I found a stash of them over at the Archive and proceeded to download the lot. The total size was a little on the higher size, so I checked the list of files to be downloaded. One 10-gig zipfile popped out at me - the official strategy guide for the arcade game "Dungeons & Dragons - Shadows over Mystara".

Being both interested and curious I put it at the front of the download queue and check back on it two hours later. I open the zipfile and it's full of .tiff files - each page is 90 megabytes. So I unzip them to a folder and it's 18 gigs of image files. "That's nice, I'll just convert them into something smaller and be done with it."

Except eventually it finishes unzipping the files and I can finally look at the pages.



It's the Japanese version of the guide. In GRORIUS URTRA-HIGH RESORUTION!

My hard drive breathes a sigh of relief as it flushes down a 30-gig turd.

So yeah, plenty of cool stuff on the Internet Archive - but also large clumps of autism, it seems.

I would have complained about you not getting the smaller version, but I found the strategy guide you were mentioning, no smaller version. Interesting choice, I understand why people do ultra-high resolution scans, so they don't lose any data, but I fail to see the advantage in not producing a version that isn't in the GBs. 'Course, I also don't see the point of not figuring out how to scan them in a way that doesn't need hundreds of millions of pixels to get decent scans. I don't see the Japanese bit being a problem. It still deserves being archived even if the writers don't understand how to use spaces and the Latin alphabet. I got a bunch of old Japanese magazines off there, late '80s and early '90s computer stuff. I think one of them is dedicated to early 3D, a fascination of mine.

 

[Shinji]

Huh, someone interviewed the creator of Hong Kong 97

Timestamp

01:57 : Introduction
04:45 : Youth
06:49 : BBS Tokyo Isoternet
08:49 : Interest in Asia/Books
12:18 : Games
29:50 : Calcutta Records
35:05 : Documentaries
40:03 : Game Urara
45:51 : Favorite works
47:00 : Viewer questions
53:35 : Giveaways
56:12 : Gift for Kurosawa
57:42 : Sell Hong Kong 97 announcement

 

[Unkillable Cat]

 

[Corvinus]

 

[Ninja Destroyer]