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Completed Let's Larp the Court of King Vale clumsily preparing a royal summit in Fit To Be A King

V_K

Arcane
Joined
Nov 3, 2013
Messages
7,714
Location
at a Nowhere near you
Oh, I just noticed that the insolent whippesnapper has called your majesty boring. A few days years in jail should teach him some manners!
I think I should be knighted so we can start an inquisition.
Can't wait! I even have an idea of whom to start with. "Dog" is "God" spelled backwards - surely a sign of heresy?
 

Helly

Translating for brofists
Patron
Joined
Dec 16, 2011
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2,176
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変態の地獄、Rance様と
Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Shadorwun: Hong Kong Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag. My team has the sexiest and deadliest waifus you can recruit.
HtDIuwE.png

Bossman, you know what you should do?
Go hunt some of those bears in the forest in the south. I'm sure the soldier will accompany you if needed. Having some bear stew for the Summit would be a great addition to the roasted chicken dragon your knight brought back!
 

Andnjord

Arcane
Joined
Aug 22, 2012
Messages
3,027
Location
The Eye of Terror
wbWVOtk.png
Mylord, I for one counsel against any of this execution craze. There is no proof nor even the hint of suspition that any of your faithful servants commited anything untoward against your Majesty. In particular, I refuse the believe that Thou would reap any reward from executing your Knight Strange Fellow. It has already been made clear that he is blessed by the Gods, and surely, one does not want to anger the Gods, my Liege.

OOC: Are we in a monotheistic or a polytheistic religion by the way?
 

ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,605
wbWVOtk.png
Mylord, I for one counsel against any of this execution craze. There is no proof nor even the hint of suspition that any of your faithful servants commited anything untoward against your Majesty. In particular, I refuse the believe that Thou would reap any reward from executing your Knight Strange Fellow. It has already been made clear that he is blessed by the Gods, and surely, one does not want to anger the Gods, my Liege.

OOC: Are we in a monotheistic or a polytheistic religion by the way?
Bible and Pope, I think we are tritheistic : The Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit :).

I am going to try to run the turn today (for an healthy 1turn/day, given I will not bother with mapping anymore). Currently "take the boat" leads at +9.
 

Strange Fellow

Peculiar
Patron
Joined
Jun 21, 2018
Messages
4,014
Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag.
Listen man, your job is literally being a sinner, so don't pretend like you have any sort of moral high ground here. You just watch it, unless you want the Pope out of the picture altogether. Then you'll have no one to confess your sins to, punk.
 

V_K

Arcane
Joined
Nov 3, 2013
Messages
7,714
Location
at a Nowhere near you
You just watch it, unless you want the Pope out of the picture altogether
Father Azira, look at this blasphemer! Surely the first second act of your newly formed inquisition should be joining our cause to have him executed?
your job is literally being a sinner
Because it takes one to know one. Ridding this kingdom of heathens and heretics is my repentance.
 

ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,605
Final tally

Execute anyone : Helly(2)
Execute Knight Strange Fellow : Mondblut (3), V_K (3), Helly(2), but Andnjord (-3)
Execute Maxie : Vazha(3) + Helly (2)
Execute Mondblut : Strange Fellow (6), Helly(2) but Darth Roxxor (-3)
Jail Horatii : V_K (3),
Execute Andnjord : V_K (3), Helly(2)
Knight Mondblut : V_K (3)
Knight Azira : Azira (3)


What to do next :
Navigate : Mondblut (3), Strange Fellow (6)
Explore the castle : Endemic (1)
Explore South : Helly(3)
Reform Religion : Azira(3), VK (3)

Well, no one gets executed or killed. Religion stays as it is. Tindrli remains in jail. I take a ship and leave.
 
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Dayyālu

Arcane
Joined
Jul 1, 2012
Messages
4,466
Location
Shaper Crypt
rxcidDK.png
My King! The hour is late and the Devil has tried your VERY soul! Do not [r]eform the Church! Damnation awaits!


(Fuck I got distracted by Halo autism for a day and THIS happens?)
 

ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,605
You forgot "jail Darco" part.
Sorry, mixed names up. Horatii is the kid, I voted for jailing him, not executing. I'm not a monster.
(unless the kid's possessed, but that's for the priest to decide)
OK, so I ll change method. Instead of resetting at each update, I will just "keep" the history update-to-update until one of you change your mind.

I did not do anything this round, because my first travel abroad took me quite some time. and ended in a perfect way to end the session, so no reform, no prison, no nothing. I won't be able to post tonight though, so I will update tomorrow both the story and the vote tally.

And God now I need to find more Codexers, including another "ruler".
 
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ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,605
Part V : King Vale travels

So the Council voted that I should seek support outside my (fairly small, I have to admit) Kingdom.

Getting outside the throne room, I realized there is a space where we storage everything for the summit. Nice :

YUee9Pi.png


Not sure leaving the flan and meat outside in the wet climate of not-Britain is a good idea though.

Anyway, moving on I got to my ship :

Ko9sVM0.png


I tried to first go Eastward, but my ship cannot pass the drawbridge ^^ :

mqsQF16.png


So I decided to go upriver, then Westward...

V9lbRB9.png

jB8vlTS.png

... blocking by giant sharks.

Trying North, giant sharks everywhere ...

wvIj43m.png


... until I found a sort of "path" of blue water ...

u4XPB2l.png


... which, after a fade to black, brought me somewhere NEW !


I really like the new place. For starter, unlike not-Britain, it has CATS !

2doVtoO.png


I pass a first bridge, where there is also a goat !

7lDRSzg.png


I reach the city and I am impressed. It is full of colors, merchants everywhere, and the streets are paved with stones like in my castle !

PmxH7a0.png


Sadly, I can't understand the locals :

UalzMCi.png


I even tried the language I read in my book, with no success :

3wF7gJp.png


I get into an house, and it is as wealthy as in my castle, though smaller :

ieA0e6z.png


We can't have that, so I execute a gold-transfer to my account :

x5ZpGr0.png


gxqTBUU.png
Sorry my Good Sir, I can't understand you !


I finally reach a place with a large room, actually pretty nice orientalish MIDIish music, and a bunch of people :

lcOhqru.png


As I know how to play the lute, I try to play that piece I read in the book that seduce the ladies. I get an achievement, and someone interjects that he prefers sailors songs !

f5gzYy1.png


Hmm, I DO know a sailor.

I return back to Captain Draco with some questions :

TFnu5dk.png
Captain Draco is singing a shanty. He sings : What do we do with a drunken sailor...
TFnu5dk.png
Back already ?
gxqTBUU.png
Your ship is REEAAALLLY fast. I can go to not-Grenada in MINUTES ! Even though Grenada disappeared some 10 or 20 years ago !
TFnu5dk.png
<shanty> : I hear the song in my dream ! What a shanty! It goes 888898685. So hearty to (P)lay
gxqTBUU.png
That's all I need to know ! Goodbye !

I get back in not-Grenada, and play the correct music :

8Mcch06.png


T65GEka.png


gxqTBUU.png
Good to know. "Sesame".

Well, I want to know better that person talking to me :


qh7TaNZ.png
Hey, you're the King of my home country!
qh7TaNZ.png
<name> I'm Taxalot, nice to meet you
qh7TaNZ.png
<job> I'm a merchant originally from your country
qh7TaNZ.png
I left. That's why I stopped commenting in your previous Let's Play and left Sergiu64 pick up my slack.
qh7TaNZ.png
<merchant> I sell this and that, I don't spend much time back home
qh7TaNZ.png
<country> You know, I have an idea about our country
qh7TaNZ.png
<idea> Yeah. You reform the church laws and I'll pay ya for the laughs
qh7TaNZ.png
<reform> If you ever reform your church, ask me about my idea
qh7TaNZ.png
<summit> Heard about a summit back home, don't care much.

Leaving this happy place, I passed a bridge and reached a castle !

3kEAlCe.png


Going South, I added a new animal to the game bestiary : a MONKEY !

UcWzYgp.png


I had read about the Monkey language, and tested it :

gxqTBUU.png
Ook [give me]

TdrYomS.png



gxqTBUU.png
Ackack [Friend]

xDMTQ45.png


gxqTBUU.png
Ah ! I doubt Blakemore will have monkeys in the summit !

Moving to the left, I reached the throne room :

y9ukPdd.png


I ignored the ruler for now and opened the door North :

6Kl7LeC.png


A guard, and a treasure room on the left. The right door led to another kind of treasure :

s56aOJY.png


A princess AND a weird bird. Impressive place.

I immediately talked to the Lady, which had been educated in my language :

pT8AA8G.png
Good day. I am the Sultan's daugher. Are you a suitor ?
pT8AA8G.png
<no> Good. I am waiting to be asked by King Blakemore!
pT8AA8G.png
OK, now I am a suitor !
pT8AA8G.png
<name> I am Princess Sukhavati. I hope to wed King Blakemore!
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I did not recognize you, you just changed your avatar
pT8AA8G.png
<princess> That I am.
pT8AA8G.png
<blakemore> You must admit he's quite handsome
gxqTBUU.png
Well, if you were a rat, you would find ME handsome.
pT8AA8G.png
<king> You and my father are both kings... perhaps I shall be a queen.
pT8AA8G.png
<queen> My mother was a great queen, such as I hope to be.
pT8AA8G.png
<job> I must wed in the interests of the kingdom
pT8AA8G.png
<web> We shall have the finest lute players at my wedding.
pT8AA8G.png
<lute> The lute is surely the most romantic of instruments
pT8AA8G.png
<romantic> All romantics must love the lute.

Well, since the likes the lute, you can already guess what I did next :

b6ZfmuE.png


pT8AA8G.png
Oh! My heart! I am in love! Ask my father to wed us!

Well, that was fast ! Off to the father !

qLnO8sX.png
Ah, Vale. Welcome to my palace. I have a gift for you!
qLnO8sX.png
<gift> As I cannot attend your summit, I grant you these peacocks in my stead ! Take good care of them !

KE4eU3J.png

gxqTBUU.png
OK ! Peacock ! That's how they are called.
gxqTBUU.png
Well, now I regret not doing it.
qLnO8sX.png
<name> I am Infinitron, called the Magnificent
qLnO8sX.png
<job> I am sultan here. Though I dabble in cat training.
qLnO8sX.png
<sultan> Like a king, but more magnificent
qLnO8sX.png
<cat> My cat otto was the finest I ever trained. But he's free now.
qLnO8sX.png
<king> I am actually a sultan
qLnO8sX.png
I must also command you for your restraint !
gxqTBUU.png
Restraint ?
qLnO8sX.png
You did not call the monkey TemplarGR
qLnO8sX.png
<Otto> Otto had mismatched eyes, and knew the best trick.
qLnO8sX.png
<eyes> Otto's mismatched eyes made him my favorite. That and his training.
gxqTBUU.png
... so I have to inspect the 1 pixel-eye of all the cats on the island ? Great.
qLnO8sX.png
<training> I train cats in all kids of tricks, but Otto was my finest.
qLnO8sX.png
<tricks> If you talked about gold around Otto, he'd try to find some!
qLnO8sX.png
<gold> I love training cats. Especially if it gets me gold.
qLnO8sX.png
<daughter> She will always be my little princess.
gxqTBUU.png
Well, SHE has.
qLnO8sX.png
<princess> Perhaps she shall marry Blakemore. I've not decided.
qLnO8sX.png
<marry> My daughter cries bitter tears, begging me to allow your proposal. I cannot forbid my belowed daughter anything. You may marry her. But if you mistreat her, there will be war!
qLnO8sX.png
<war> I do not easily go to war. But I will, if needed.
qLnO8sX.png
<mistreat> There will be war if you dare mistreat my daughter
qLnO8sX.png
<summit> I would attend but eh, I got cat training

Sadly, I can't quite marry the lass :

BmWVcih.png


And remember I can't divorce either.

Anyway, I went to check the library :

CeRuaf5.png


It has one interesting book, and two books I knew [on monkey language, and on finance] :

6BCIg09.png

PpxJdch.png


As you probably remember, I also knew a very special word :

L3cQkSC.png


I led to a pontoon and a boat ...

Huxvcmf.png


The boat itself only allowed me to reach a small island with treasures :

as4PJBc.png



So I went back to the City to find the mismatched-eyed cat.

I had a faint suspicion I would find it in this narrow street between two buildings :

EF5leiH.png


But there were no cats, only a treasure :

xdoJmPn.png


And just as I picked the treasure :

gboa2TK.png


An assassin came to me ! I tried fighting back, to no avail :

7zyfMrw.png

WDtYfyi.png


Fade to black....











6gYQNNm.png


wbWVOtk.png
Thank goodness thou art with us again! We were all very worried over thy condition. Thou hast been unconscious for so long that we thought thou hadst lost thy life!

wbWVOtk.png
It is most fortunate that thou fell so near our shelter. Thou must have a protector watching over thee.
gxqTBUU.png
... what...
wbWVOtk.png
It was Elizabeth and Abraham who found thee and delivered thee to us.
gxqTBUU.png
... oh no ! Don't say it !
wbWVOtk.png
They brought thee here along their way to Britain.
gxqTBUU.png
DON'T SAY IT !
wbWVOtk.png
IT IS TRULY MYSTERIOUS HOW THIS CONTINUES TO HAPPEN TO THEE!
gxqTBUU.png
AAAAAARRRRRRGGGG

wbWVOtk.png
If you prefer I have death-specific texts. For instance :
wbWVOtk.png
<assassin> I am glad you survived. Be careful, your Majesty
wbWVOtk.png
<trap> Look carefully when walking in the crypt.
 
Last edited:

ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,605
Decision dashboard (to message #129)

Exploration (reset each turn), decision at majority or plurality.
Castle courtyard :
Rampart :
Village :
Subterranean sea : Mondblut (3), Endemic (1)


Politics - decision taken at +8.
Reform : V_K (3), Strange Fellow (6), Darth Roxxor (3) but Do not Reform : Dayyalu (3), Andnjord (3) => Balance at +6
Execute the dog : V_K (3), Mondblut (3) but Do not Execute the dog : Helly (3) => Balance at +3

Execute Priest : V_K (3), Helly (3) = +6
Execute Tindrli : Mondblut (3), Andnjord (3), Helly (3), Darth Roxxor (3) but Forgive Tindrli : Dayyalu (3), Strange Fellow (6) => Balances at 3

Execute Strange Fellow : Mondblut(3), Helly(3), V_K(+3) do not execute Andjord (-3) => +6
Execute Maxie : Vazha (3), Helly(3) do not execute Andjord (-3) => +3
Execute Mondblut : Strange Fellow (6), Helly(3) do not execute Darth Roxxor (-3), Andjnord (-3) = 0
Knight Azira : Azira (3)= +3
Jail Horatii : V_K (3) = +3
Execute Andnjord : V_K (3), Helly (3) so +6

Execute Volourn : Vazha(3), Mondblut(3), Helly(3), Dayyalu (3) so +12
 
Last edited:

vazha

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2013
Messages
2,063
Good stuff. Profile pictures are mixed up here and there though.

Regarding the kingdomme, sirrah, surely ditching volourn and wedding that oriental beauty must be a no brainer? To that end, I have a perfect, King Henry-esque solution to thine dilemma, majesty: execute your current bride. This will remove the need to reform the church and spare you the expenses of a divorce, all the while remaining true to the historical prototype.

P.s. Oh and jail that dimwit Horvatii for his inane comments in Battle Brothers thread.
 

Darth Roxor

Royal Dongsmith
Staff Member
Joined
May 29, 2008
Messages
1,878,406
Location
Djibouti
Ah, we are blocked from the proper harem ending.

chefchomik.png
I gots the finest pork ham today, and I can't serve it cuz it's friday. If only the good king (R)eformed this outdated superstition!
chefchomik.png
I could even take it to that traitor Tindrli in the dunjin. How come nobody's e(X)ecuted xir yet?
 

ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,605
Good stuff. Profile pictures are mixed up here and there though.

Regarding the kingdomme, sirrah, surely ditching volourn and wedding that oriental beauty must be a no brainer? To that end, I have a perfect, King Henry-esque solution to thine dilemma, majesty: execute your current bride. This will remove the need to reform the church and spare you the expenses of a divorce, all the while remaining true to the historical prototype.

P.s. Oh and jail that dimwit Horvatii for his inane comments in Battle Brothers thread.
Yeah, I believe we can King Henry Volourn no problem, the game planned that.
I ll edit the dashboard as people comment rather than being spammy.
 

mondblut

Arcane
Joined
Aug 10, 2005
Messages
22,205
Location
Ingrija
Indeede, lyege, 'tis tyme for myssyse Volourne to departe this worlde. I can't waite to make my acquaintancee with the exotique grenadiene beautie. And don't forgete the cate. He couldst scare awaye that nastie barkynge unhornede goate who is in cahootes with the treasonouse guarde captaine...

Mayhaps thou shouldst grynde on rates in the cellare fyrste. Foule Blakemore couldst sende more assassynes thy waye, thou shouldst gayne some levels to prepare.
 

Dayyālu

Arcane
Joined
Jul 1, 2012
Messages
4,466
Location
Shaper Crypt
rxcidDK.png
King! Be careful about visiting the lands of the Mohammedans. They're a treacherous and untrustworthy people, of curious habit and dress.

rxcidDK.png
But I want to address my fellow courtiers, particularly those that support the TREACHEROUS [r]eform: are you willing to risk soul and eternal damnation for the mere chance of giving your good King polygamy, like the Mohammedans do? Think of the consequences! Think of the Holy Father, a kindly and gentle old man in Rome!

Angelo_Bronzino_-_Portrait_of_Pope_Clement_VII_-_WGA3272.jpg


Pictured: Kind, old man in Rome

Actually a very unfortunate hardass

rxcidDK.png
I fully understand that your current wife may be barren like a field in Galles, but the other opti....

NpmBUFM.jpg


rxcidDK.png
Uh, good. But make sure she's converted after you marry the Sultan's daughter, right? [E]xecute Queen Volourn. Isn't that cleaner than a divorce?
 

Endemic

Arcane
Joined
Jul 16, 2012
Messages
4,321
Explore the subterranean sea.
 

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