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Crispy™ Forza Horizon 5

Joined
Aug 10, 2012
Messages
5,869
I don't understand modern games, I just don't. Installed this on gamepass, game bombarded me with how awesome I am, flashed a lot of spazzy shit on my screen, ridiculous cars falling from the sky. It seems impossible to fail. You can drive through rolling hills at 300km/h and nothing will happen.

Zero incentive for me to play this. Looks nice, I guess.
 
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King Crispy

Too bad I have no queen.
Patron
Staff Member
Joined
Feb 16, 2008
Messages
1,876,561
Location
Future Wasteland
Strap Yourselves In
The appeal isn't to just plow through fields without your car destroying yourself, that's not how Horizon "rolls".

The point is to compete in the various events (which are almost all quite difficult, imo) using either a car or car class that you restrict yourself to, to complete your ultimate car collection, and possibly to join up with friends and show off your stupid clothing collection and emotes.

Some of it is worth the time. The game is simply gorgeous. Some of it is stupid wankery bullshit. Your mileage, literally, may vary.
 

anvi

Prophet
Village Idiot
Joined
Oct 12, 2016
Messages
7,530
Location
Kelethin
I've always wondered about this series.. even a non-driving game fan friend of mine was converted by it. Why do people like it so much?
Because it's dumbed down as far as it gets. Press W to make the pretty graphics move. It doesn't feel anything like driving at all you hardly even need to steer, it's fucking shameful what has happened to gaming. And forget about turning driving aids on/off whatever, it's not that kind of game. It's a press a button and it drives itself sort of game. Not even sure it qualifies as a game, it's like a semi interactive movie.
 

Dedicated_Dark

Arbiter
Joined
Nov 21, 2015
Messages
957
Location
Beyond the Grave
Fun game with a great driving model. Good driving game but a very poor racing game.
The biggest frustrations I have are:
- Races are scripted, AI speeds up then slows down in the last lap to give you the dramatic finish. Every time.. makes a very poor racing experience.
- Characters are obnoxious and in your face with dialogs that are so flaccid that I'm impressed an actual living breathing human being wrote it.
- Rubber-banding showcase events at this point are just dull.
- Censorship in songs, to start with the song selection is very poor for a racing game and to top it off half of it is censored, by censored I mean butchered.

Finally.. using the term 'Superstar' to refer to the player is just cringe. I'm genuinely confused and curious who thought it will make anyone feel good. Also, if I'm already a superstar how is anything I'm accomplishing in the game great? I'm expected to be the best just with that term, all the achievements I earn are expected off me. How is that fair? I tune my car, paint it to look cool, practice and then win the races and the adoration I get is "As expected" fuck you game. I am a multi-classing genius who by skill and effort is kicking all your asses in cross country, dirt, sprint, circuit and whatever and the respect I get is superstar? What bullshittery is this! I demand my respect for my work, you can't just fucking squeeze all my achievements into 2 words. And if I don't come first in an event it isn't considered completed? Wtf so unless I come first it's equivalent to coming last? Because I didn't live upto your expectation of a SUPERSTAR? FUCK YOU GAME!! SUCK MY COCK MOTHERFUCKER!~
 

anvi

Prophet
Village Idiot
Joined
Oct 12, 2016
Messages
7,530
Location
Kelethin
Everyone under 30 ish is a superstar. Because they live on the internet where everything is fake and words are meaningless.
 

King Crispy

Too bad I have no queen.
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Staff Member
Joined
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Messages
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Strap Yourselves In
- Races are scripted, AI speeds up then slows down in the last lap to give you the dramatic finish. Every time.. makes a very poor racing experience.

Absolutely true, but afaict this has been true throughout the entire series (1 - 5). The AI slows way down in certain corners or bends allowing you to pass at least three or four cars then they miraculously catch up to you in the home stretch forcing you to aggressively block them from passing you. It's just part of the formula of this game and the nature of AI in general.

- Rubber-banding showcase events at this point are just dull.

I haven't seen any of this, but I've been lucky in that my connection to the servers has never reset, like what's being widely reported. Supposedly, the coming patch is going to address the problem.
 

anvi

Prophet
Village Idiot
Joined
Oct 12, 2016
Messages
7,530
Location
Kelethin
So when you reach the end of the race do they have the festival with all races and genders and hairstyles putting their hands in the air?
 
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
8,818
Location
Italy
rubberbanding is the greatest, worst sin any driving game can commit. the reason i'll always love wip3out: if you sucked, you sucked. maybe even picked a tough but slow ship to endure more collisions, like fuck you were going to win. all you got was mines in the face and overtakes. on the other hand, if you were good, oh so sweet delicious race without opponents, the race was against yourself, full focus on it, and it made you actually get even better and better, with rubberbanding on, you're never going to understand when or if you're doing well, nor you're going to be truly punished when you suck.
 

Belegarsson

Think about hairy dwarfs all the time ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Patron
Joined
Oct 20, 2015
Messages
1,261
Location
Uwotopia
Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag.
I find the AI way more aggressive than usual. FH4 was a bit of a breeze, I had no trouble placing in top 3 on Expert in most events, but in this game I struggle to do the same on Above Average in FH5. Am I rusty or what :mad:
 

ADL

Prophet
Joined
Oct 23, 2017
Messages
3,680
Location
Nantucket
I find the AI way more aggressive than usual. FH4 was a bit of a breeze, I had no trouble placing in top 3 on Expert in most events, but in this game I struggle to do the same on Above Average in FH5. Am I rusty or what :mad:
FH5's AI is definitely more aggressive and better in general. Above Average is where I start to cap out too without massively upgrading my cars.
 

Gerrard

Arcane
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,927
So what, did 5 not even have offroad car options from the start?
 

ind33d

Educated
Joined
Jun 23, 2020
Messages
804
P. neat so far. Looks amazing, framerate is only a little lower than FH4 was running.

If anyone's experiencing crashing to desktop, especially in the (incredibly annoying and completely un-skippable) introduction sequence, try removing Nahimic audio drivers if they're present in your system.

Here's a great guide to removing Nahimic (which is a completely unnecessary part of Realtek audio).

The crashing stopped for me once I did that.
I literally just bought a headset off the shelf and thought it was broken until I uninstalled Nahimic. It's unreal how bad software is
 

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