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NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

Discussion in 'General Gaming' started by Jaesun, Mar 15, 2011.

  1. Puukko Arcane

    Puukko
    Joined:
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    Location:
    The Khanate
     
    • Funny Funny x 3
    • nice nice x 1
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  2. Infinitron I post news Patron

    Infinitron
    Joined:
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    RPG Wokedex Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Kingmaker
     
    • Funny Funny x 6
    • Okily Dokily! Okily Dokily! x 1
    • quality shit quality shit x 1
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  3. Curious_Tongue Larpfest Patron

    Curious_Tongue
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    Codex 2012 Codex 2013 Serpent in the Staglands Codex USB, 2014
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 21, 2021
    • Brofist Brofist x 1
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  4. Unkillable Cat Prestigious Gentleman LEST WE FORGET Patron

    Unkillable Cat
    Joined:
    May 13, 2009
    Messages:
    22,686
    Codex 2014 Make the Codex Great Again! Grab the Codex by the pussy
    How to suck the life and charm out of everything because of autism, Part 367:

     
    • decline decline x 6
    • Brofist Brofist x 1
    • Rage Rage x 1
    • Disgusting! Disgusting! x 1
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  5. garren Arcane Patron

    garren
    Joined:
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    Location:
    Grue-Infested Darkness
    Probably posted before but reminded me of this:
     
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  6. Sukhāvatī a.k.a. Mañjuśṛī Patron

    Sukhāvatī
    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2019
    Messages:
    4,049
    Location:
    འ༔ ཨ༔ ཧ༔ ཤ༔ ས༔ མ༔
     
    • Brofist Brofist x 8
    • nice nice x 1
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  7. markec Twitterbot Patron

    markec
    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2010
    Messages:
    26,976
    Location:
    Croatia
    Codex 2012 Strap Yourselves In Dead State Project: Eternity Codex USB, 2014 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 Pathfinder: Kingmaker
     
    • decline decline x 1
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  8. Daemongar Arcane Patron

    Daemongar
    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2010
    Messages:
    3,833
    Location:
    Wisconsin
    Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire
    What part of "No SJW Posts" threw you off? Two guys talking unironically about gender problems in a nintendo game for 60 seconds straight was all I could take... does the last 19 minutes get better or funny at some point?
     
    • /facepalm/ /facepalm/ x 1
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  9. markec Twitterbot Patron

    markec
    Joined:
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    Croatia
    Codex 2012 Strap Yourselves In Dead State Project: Eternity Codex USB, 2014 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 Pathfinder: Kingmaker
    I thought it was pretty obvious that those two guys are joking.
     
    • Interesting Interesting x 1
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  10. Daemongar Arcane Patron

    Daemongar
    Joined:
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    Wisconsin
    Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire
    I can't tell, but I can't bring myself to watch anymore. Someone braver is going to have to chime in.
     
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  11. Caim Arcane

    Caim
    Joined:
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    8,706
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    Dutchland
    It's satire, but the worst kind of satire: not very good satire. Note that it's from 2014.
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Thanks! Thanks! x 1
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  12. Sukhāvatī a.k.a. Mañjuśṛī Patron

    Sukhāvatī
    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2019
    Messages:
    4,049
    Location:
    འ༔ ཨ༔ ཧ༔ ཤ༔ ས༔ མ༔
     
    • Salute Salute x 4
    • Informative Informative x 1
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  13. e-mailio estevez Arcane

    e-mailio estevez
    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2012
    Messages:
    1,254
    i have a PC Gamer that has this ad. also a fallout 1 receipt.

    edit: old PC gamers are actually an interesting beast. their reviews were often gimmicky and cringe, but one year they did select Deus Ex as top RPG of the year (possibly GOTY) over Baldur's Gate 2- which at the time i found fucking stupid and offensive but in retrospect is probably a sign of enlightment.\

    not worht the paper it's printed on today though i'm sure
     
    Last edited: Sep 25, 2021
    • It's a matter of time x 1
    • Informative x 1
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  14. Infinitron I post news Patron

    Infinitron
    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2011
    Messages:
    89,024
    RPG Wokedex Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Kingmaker
     
    • Funny x 6
    • hopw roewur ne x 1
    • Makes you think... x 1
    • Sweat gathers upon my brow, let me dab it x 1
    • Begone thot! x 1
    • Doggy x 1
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  15. Catacombs Magister Patron

    Catacombs
    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2017
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    • it is a mystery it is a mystery x 1
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  16. rusty_shackleford Arcane

    rusty_shackleford
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2018
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    33,259
    It's not mine, I found it when trying to find more information about the Arcanum novel that came with some editions.
     
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  17. Catacombs Magister Patron

    Catacombs
    Joined:
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    Messages:
    4,178
    I aimed my comment at the guy who put it up on eBay :lol:
     
    • "It was Aliens" "It was Aliens" x 1
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  18. Infinitron I post news Patron

    Infinitron
    Joined:
    Jan 28, 2011
    Messages:
    89,024
    RPG Wokedex Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 A Beautifully Desolate Campaign Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire Pathfinder: Kingmaker Pathfinder: Kingmaker
    Half an hour of C64 games with AVGN:

     
    • Brofist x 1
    • nice x 1
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    • I found this text to be too long and as such I didn't read it x 1
    • No x 1
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  19. Taka-Haradin puolipeikko Prestigious Gentleman Filthy Kalinite Patron

    Taka-Haradin puolipeikko
    Joined:
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    Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire Make the Codex Great Again! Grab the Codex by the pussy Bubbles In Memoria
     
    • Funny Funny x 2
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  20. Mikeal Magister

    Mikeal
    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2016
    Messages:
    2,473
    Location:
    Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth
    [​IMG]
     
    • what? what? x 2
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    • WTF am I reading WTF am I reading x 1
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  21. Mikeal Magister

    Mikeal
    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2016
    Messages:
    2,473
    Location:
    Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth
    [​IMG]
     
    • Funny x 8
    • Kitty x 5
    • incline x 1
    • Friendly x 1
    • Doggy x 1
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  22. Hóngwèibīng Arcane Vatnik Wumao

    Hóngwèibīng
    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2018
    Messages:
    12,409
    Location:
    中国世纪
    Those small Khajiits are cute, but I prefer...
    [​IMG]
    The Blackfeather Court by Ulysa Rervam (open)

    A treatise on the Blackfeather Court
    My ongoing quest for information regarding the Daedric realms and their inhabitants led me to investigate rumors of a portal in the city of Davon's Watch. After much searching, I discovered an entrance to a pocket realm within the Evergloam, a place known only as the Crow's Wood. Similar in its ominous feel to the rest of Nocturnal's mysterious realm, the Crow's Wood appears as a dark marsh full of dangerous creatures. Most notably, a murder of intelligent, talking crows inhabits the area and considers the place to be its personal kingdom. Here is what I learned during my brief sojourn to the Crow's Wood.

    The crows organize themselves using a feudal system and refer to their flock as the Blackfeather Court. These birds claim to be the spawn of a hagraven they call the Crow Mother, and they constantly strive to defend their domain from wolves, giant bats, and other predatory creatures that roam the shadowy realm. The Duke of Crows leads the Court. This large, proud bird presides over the rest of the flock because, as he tells it, he's "the smartest and biggest and loudest" crow in the murder. Indeed, for these noisy, talkative birds, the ability to stand out among the crowd is considered not only a necessity, but a symbol of prestige. The rest of the flock clusters and conspires around the Duke of Crows, engaging in their insistent plotting and politicking for status and favor.

    Not that the Duke of Crows appears to do much more than preen and bluster. The real work of the Blackfeather Court, such as it is, falls to the Seneschal of Carrion and the Court Castellan. Both of these birds serve the Duke of Crows, but they evidently have the freedom and authority to perform independently to keep the Court operating efficiently—or, at least as efficiently as any group of intelligent birds can manage. The Seneschal of Carrion takes care of the assorted domestic arrangements for the Court, as well as acting as the steward for the Duke of Crows. The Seneschal also adjudicates the various tributes of death and carnage regularly heaped upon the Court. (Although to be fair, except for the tributes they requested of me, I saw no one else seeking the favor of the Duke of Crows and his flock during my visit.) The Court Castellan, on the other hand (wing?), acts as the governor of the Court. This involves overseeing the various knights and knaves that serve the Court, including the Knights of Marrow, Pith, Gore, and Vitreous, and the Knaves of Rooks, Pipes, and Ravens. As with everything surrounding the Court, there appears to be more attention paid to pomp and circumstance than to actually accomplishing anything of substance.

    Eventually, it falls to the Bursar of Tributes, a feathered accountant of sorts, to sort and catalog the tributes of death and carnage that add to the Court's ever-growing hoard of shiny objects. The crows charge visitors who enter the realm, either a toll of flesh or silver, to grant temporary safe passage through the Crow's Wood. Anyone who refuses to pay, be they featherless tourists or birds of a different persuasion, is subject to any and every disgrace and degradation the crows can come up with, including incessant cawing, pecking, and foul droppings on heads and fancy clothing. I paid the toll for an opportunity to wander among the Court and talk to its members, but it isn't clear to me that such a payment was absolutely necessary. They are just crows, after all.

    As I prepared to depart the Crow's Wood, the Knave of Ravens sidled over to me, fixed me with her curious sideways gaze, and uttered this ominous proclamation: "Pay attention, featherless cur! Today the Blackfeather Court rules the Crow's Wood. But tomorrow? Tomorrow the Night Mistress has grander plans for our respected murder!" The word followed me back to Tamriel, along with an echo of caws. "Murder!"

    I may never feel completely safe around a gathering of birds again.
     
    • :M :M x 4
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  23. Black Arcane

    Black
    Joined:
    May 8, 2007
    Messages:
    1,870,656
     
    • Funny x 19
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