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NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

Joined
Nov 8, 2006
Messages
7,870
Location
New York
I joined their roleplay as a short, fat, faggot Bosmer Vampire.

Scanning through their roleplay its all basically small talk.

- "Have you tried this dirink?"

- "I have tried this drink, its good!"

- "Can I have some too?"

- "Sure, go ahead and have some. It tastes good. Afterwards we have to go on our quest."

- "No problem, first lets finish eating and drinking."

BIOWARE ARE U TAKING NOTES?!
 

JrK

Prophet
Joined
Oct 2, 2006
Messages
1,764
Location
Speaking to the Sea
Those guys suck at nwn2. I didn't have any problems except for the occasional Neeshka death, because her AC sucked at the time. Really, Isaac's Missile Storm and Call Lightning work wonders in that area, coupled with the occasional Hold Monster to hold some of the rogues targeting the casters. Also, Khelgar was doing his mighty chop with his dwarven waraxe, often hitting criticals for 40+ damage. My main char is a fighter6/rogue1/duelistx, with maxed parry skill, and she had no trouble at all holding Moire at bay. Gotta love the ripostes.

Also, it is not a well-thought-out area. Spamming the same type of monsters over and over again in a way that they spawn when you're so close they can automatically see you sucks. It was horrible here, and it was horrible in the orc caves. It distracts from the otherwise intruiging storyline, and my char, while neutral good, couldn't care anymore about the endless hacking without end.
 

Blacklung

Arbiter
Joined
Jan 19, 2006
Messages
1,115
Location
The geological, topographical, theological pancake
Of course, then again, when I really think about it, the NPC dialogue from Morrowind was one of the worst features. Not because reading is TEH HARD, but because it wasn't very well done, wasn't interesting, and didn't change much from NPC to NPC. Most of the time I would read the first few sentences, get the gist of it being completely unimportant or repeated, and click on another topic. Not that Oblivion's voices have improved that...now they say less, I have to hear their poor, obnoxious (and repeated) voiceovers, and the dialogue is even more ridiculous/boring.

However, that guy didn't seem to have much of a blessing for his cranium capacity.
 

Jasede

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Jan 4, 2005
Messages
24,793
Insert Title Here RPG Wokedex Codex Year of the Donut I'm very into cock and ball torture
The worst yiffers on Furcadia have better writing skills than those devilspawn. They should be burned to ashes for the sake of our gene pool. Those guys, people, those guys are reproducing, spreading their bloodline of retardedness in our holy, sacred pool of genes. Our purity must be preserved. Flay the blatantly retarded, and banish all kids from the ESF. They should be doing homework, anyway. And give me some damn coffee already, fucking machine broke.
 
Joined
Nov 8, 2006
Messages
7,870
Location
New York
I truly pray they are just kids, and not some teenagers, because their writing is just atrocious.

I tried to throw them a curveball, in a vain attempt to force them to come to a solution that does not involve killing every fucking person who walks along the road or wanders out from the woods. Unsurprisingly, they decide to use violence; fair enough, they are Bethesda fans, so they're used to using one solution to solve a variety of dilemmas. So they decide to fight the "deranged ninjas" (great idea, I'm sure Todd will steal that one).

They are prepared to fight, with the obligatory lame exclamation like "None leave us!". What happens next? Do they fight? Are they killed? Not quite...

Sij'Rath got out some deer meat peaces and started eating on it
"Do anyone else want some deer meat?" Sij'Rath asked and got another peace from his bag

These numbnuts and their fucking eating. I look at all of their threads and its nothing but non-stop fucking EATING.
 
Joined
Jul 30, 2006
Messages
5,934
Location
Being a big gay tubesteak hahahahahahahahag
Chinese Jetpilot said:
I truly pray they are just kids, and not some teenagers, because their writing is just atrocious.

I tried to throw them a curveball, in a vain attempt to force them to come to a solution that does not involve killing every fucking person who walks along the road or wanders out from the woods. Unsurprisingly, they decide to use violence; fair enough, they are Bethesda fans, so they're used to using one solution to solve a variety of dilemmas. So they decide to fight the "deranged ninjas" (great idea, I'm sure Todd will steal that one).

They are prepared to fight, with the obligatory lame exclamation like "None leave us!". What happens next? Do they fight? Are they killed? Not quite...

Sij'Rath got out some deer meat peaces and started eating on it
"Do anyone else want some deer meat?" Sij'Rath asked and got another peace from his bag

These numbnuts and their fucking eating. I look at all of their threads and its nothing but non-stop fucking EATING.

I noticed that. Very odd.
 

Vipera

Scholar
Joined
Oct 25, 2006
Messages
416
Location
Tennessee
Chinese Jetpilot said:
These numbnuts and their fucking eating. I look at all of their threads and its nothing but non-stop fucking EATING.
Maybe they have a high metabolism? :lol:
 

Elhoim

Iron Tower Studio
Developer
Joined
Oct 27, 2006
Messages
2,880
Location
San Isidro, Argentina
Final Fantasy Emo

Check this guy. His last post is hilarious! :D

http://forums.ffonline.com/showthread.php?t=46395

I believe we, mostly all of us, take Final Fantasy for granted. There are too many rants, and not enough love and praise. I do it occassionally roo, mostly too X-2 and VII, but I'm trying now to see the better light. This sort of upsets me, because now that I look back at the time when I played my first Final Fantasy, which was IX, and I replayed it to the end. It upstarted my meory of how when I was 10 when I used to write fan fiction sequals for it. You have to see how much trouble Square has to go through to make one of the games, first they have to write the script, design the gameply, and environments, in the PS2 ones they have to hire voice actors, and translators for the games and not to mention let's look back at how the series came to be, Square was about to go bankrupt and if they didn't make one game they would be a hit, the company would have to close down permanetly, and so came the title "Final Fantasy" i beleive they work hard on each and every one they come up with, except the spin offs of VII which i think they're just egging on for money. IU also realized that it was FFIX and DBZ that got me started to write my first book that I plan to create into an RPG someday and maybe even a series that could be on level with FF, it would be fun for me to be competing with them, but by the time that I make one, FF would probably be up to XV. I think as a whole we need to stop bickering about FF flaws and appreciate it as what it is.

Then he went REALLY emo: :cry:

Never mind i should've never started this thread, no one will ever understand.

And then he released his anger into the world! :twisted:

I don't have time to listen to you scurrilous peons like you who don't understand art and why FF is one of the most remarkable things on Earth that make people change their lives and the world. It's not just a video game, you take everything for granted. It is indeed very real FF expresses the problems that human life undergoes everyday and we were sent here upon this earth, without a clue of our sure existence, the world could've been in many ways, but this game is very real indeed. I suppose you have the lowest education as possible, you amuse me with your feeble mind and futile attempts to make me angry or sad. Infidel, you probably don't know what an androgynous is. It's someone who looks both male and female so I'm basically calling you a fag and the tyranny doesn't end there, you will dwell to the bottom-most of society and never be able to reign as an apostle as I will. It's a shame you all will be kissing my feet and licking the excreta from the crack of my anus in only a few years time when I will reign to ultimacy!

Even the administrator enforced bashing against this guy! :P

This thread is staying open so you guys can continue to flame this stupid fuck.

Yes, admin-endorsed flaming and online raping of a user. Have fun.

And here it is some of his "writing": :roll:

It has been 2 weeks after we had defeated Morty, my father, and released the oracles of Osheya back to the world, the oracles the bound sevants of Goddess whom created our planet Osheya. Osheya is a modern technology based world, with still some roots of third world countries like Kelkana, the country of the Kelas, a reptile, humanoid, type race. In this time space exlporation has just been discovered, only 16 years ago, so know one really knows about anything from our 2 moons.It was 4:30pm when I was boarding an airship in Calston to go to Kingsland where I would go on to discuss the future of our world to the Kingsland King and the international congress. My usually party is with me, Christina, Mike, Sarina, Sasha, Vex, Sersha, Cystrella, and Krystal. Christina is my girlfriend, she's a 22 year old Caucasian woman with the most gorgeous long black hair that anyone has ever seen. She's wearing her usually red dress with the roses encrusted into it. I haven't proposed to Christina yet but I will, we've been through so much together and I feel that I got top have her. I plan to give her a ring made from the shiva pearl that I obtained from an island in Pos's Ocean. On our journey I learned devastating news about her, she was a lost oracle of Osheya that was reincarnated, she is the reincarnation of the life oracle Mocilia. It hasn't really affected our life now but she has amazing powers that she unleasehd, she has the power to bring anything back to life and the ability to gain control over animals.

Mike is my best friend, he has a medium length blonde hair. He's a samurinja, ninja/samurai, he grew up with a hateful father that's a slob and a pig. Vex, Sasha, Cystrella, and Sersha are my other friends that I've gained from my journey. We board the airship and it takes off. That night on the airship, everyone was in the dining room eating and listening to the band, while I stayed on the deck with my Christina. She stands by the rail looking out into the stars. She turns around and looks me.

"yes?" she asks.
"Christina, Umm, I have something to ask you" I said while looking into her eyes.

"what?" she asks. looking perplexed.
I kneel down on one knee and present the ring to her. I open the red velvety case, revealing a peice of the dark red pearl set onto a silver ring glistening.

"Oh Zaden it's wonderful!" Says Christina.

"Will you marry me?" I ask her.

"Yes, yes" says Christina exasperated and she throw her arms onto me and takes the ring and puts it on her finger.

We turn around and stare at the night sky joyfully, with one armn around her. At that moment one of the stars in the sky glistens brightly and the next thing I know a bright light collides with the airship and everything goes white, I barely see Christina falling from the deck and I yell "Christina!" as I fall. Everything goes white.

I awake in a sand dune desert, frightened and confused, I call for my comrades.

"Christina, Mike, Cystrella, but no call, I notice a camel and I go over to it and get on it and begin riding the camel onward.

Hope you like it! :D
 
Joined
Nov 8, 2006
Messages
7,870
Location
New York
I tried inserting an anti-obesity message in my last post there, but apparently it went over there head.

He reaches into his purse and produces an apple. "Would you like a bite from my apple? It tastes quite good. Good food is so hard to come by. Please, have a bite. It tastes good."

His hand outstretched, you notice he is handing you the apple to eat. You want to eat it, because eating is good. Eating is good because it produces energy. But you feel as if something is amiss. Perhaps eating too much is not good. Perhaps having too much stored energy is a bad thing?

His reply?

"no thank you" he said
He thought that that could be a Poisenout apple.
He took up a peace of bread and ham and sliced the bread and put the ham between the bread as a sanwich

EATING
 

Data4

Arcane
Joined
Sep 11, 2005
Messages
5,559
Location
Over there.
Hmm... You know, if some of you guys like forum-based RP with high standards, no munchkinism or metagaming, and is moderated by a staff of Game Masters, I'd recommend Alleria (dot com). My wife is a GM there and goes by Oracle if anyone wants to get in on some decent moderated RP. It's the standard high fantasy cliche, but...

-D4
 

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