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CKII is released.
- Thread starter Trash
- Start date
Final Gambit
I won't let it end like this...
YOU THINK YOU'VE WON?!
FOOLISH CHILD! YOU ARE NOTHING TO THE CUNNING OF THE JEWS!
HELL TAKE YOU!
FOR ONCE AGAIN YOU ARE A PUPPET IN MY SHOW!
aAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
I won't let it end like this...
YOU THINK YOU'VE WON?!
FOOLISH CHILD! YOU ARE NOTHING TO THE CUNNING OF THE JEWS!
HELL TAKE YOU!
FOR ONCE AGAIN YOU ARE A PUPPET IN MY SHOW!
aAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!
Average Manatee
Arcane
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2012
- Messages
- 14,959
More important for Muslims who lower their Decadence by leading their armies in battle. Even still, hardly a priority.
Corporate_Jew_Master
Arcane
Gotta hand it to you.
The goyim thought they won.
But the goyim never win.
Soon the manboons shall copulate with each other and the Protocols will be fulfilled.
The goyim thought they won.
But the goyim never win.
Soon the manboons shall copulate with each other and the Protocols will be fulfilled.
Phoenix Down
The year is 1317 - Chaos in western Europe as succession disputes become an all-too-common occurance. Not even the Holy Roman Empire can maintain their stability.
1320 - The Kingdom of Jerusalem signed a death warrant of the entire Byzantine Empire.
The Ilkhans descended upon the Byzantines without mercy.
It was slaughter. And amidst all the chaos, only a few thousand Jerusalem troops were involved in the battles, if at all.
Basileus Iakobos knew the game is up, as tens of thousands of his men were slaughtered within months - yet the King of Jerusalem merely sent his emissary away.
When asked why they do not accept the surrender, no answer was given, only a slight cackle and chilling grin. For the Jews have other plans.
1320 - The Kingdom of Jerusalem signed a death warrant of the entire Byzantine Empire.
The Ilkhans descended upon the Byzantines without mercy.
It was slaughter. And amidst all the chaos, only a few thousand Jerusalem troops were involved in the battles, if at all.
Basileus Iakobos knew the game is up, as tens of thousands of his men were slaughtered within months - yet the King of Jerusalem merely sent his emissary away.
When asked why they do not accept the surrender, no answer was given, only a slight cackle and chilling grin. For the Jews have other plans.
Let's go, Poland Ball!
The Basileus went with a bang.
He was all over the Byzantine, in a literal sense. And so is the Byzantine empire's army - dying by the thousands as the Ilkhanate and Jerusalem's soldiers wipe every fresh levies, leaving none standing. More surrenders were sent, but ignored as Constantinople went plundered.
Elsewhere
The Pope wants Konyland. Realizing that perhaps this is the most opportune time to sever all ties with the Golden Horde, King Henry answers the call of duty, rallying every men of Jerusalem to set forth towards Poland.
It is a good thing he does, because the war is seemingly hopeless.
The Crusaders simply have no answers to the 50,000 strong Horde army.
But Henry knew Alchidai will not last, for his treasury shrunk at a rapid pace...
As the scattered remnants of the Kurwa Krusaders scatter and run from the Horde, they wondered where are the promised troops from Jerusalem?
Just in time. Approaching from the shores of Crimea - massive fleets unload nearly a hundred thousand soldiers into the unprotected Golden Horde territory.
The Normandy's levy also exploited the hardly used route in the north.
The beast is surrounded.
As the Horde's stronghold fall one after another, the Khan grew desperate and sent his 50,000 strong army on a wild chase for Jerusalem's army.
A showdown between two smaller armies proved pivotal - the first Jerusalem's victory in open battle against the Horde.
But time is running out. As the Jerusalem's 20,000 strong army holds off wave after wave of attack, the 50,000 strong - Horde finally turns towards them - there is no escape.
NO SURRENDER, NO RETREAT!
As the 50,000 horde prepare to descend upon the outnumbered Jews, a sudden horn was blown! THE WAR IS OVER!
The Khan's treasury finally ran dry and he concedes defeat -
A historical moment in Jerusalem's lineage! Much like the founder of the Kingdom, William di Normandie to Jerusalem, Henry is crowned King of Poland.
His first act was to pick a potato off the ground and declared it as 'Jerusalem's Potato.'
The Year is 1334
A new chapter of Potato is about to unfold.
He was all over the Byzantine, in a literal sense. And so is the Byzantine empire's army - dying by the thousands as the Ilkhanate and Jerusalem's soldiers wipe every fresh levies, leaving none standing. More surrenders were sent, but ignored as Constantinople went plundered.
Elsewhere
The Pope wants Konyland. Realizing that perhaps this is the most opportune time to sever all ties with the Golden Horde, King Henry answers the call of duty, rallying every men of Jerusalem to set forth towards Poland.
It is a good thing he does, because the war is seemingly hopeless.
The Crusaders simply have no answers to the 50,000 strong Horde army.
But Henry knew Alchidai will not last, for his treasury shrunk at a rapid pace...
As the scattered remnants of the Kurwa Krusaders scatter and run from the Horde, they wondered where are the promised troops from Jerusalem?
Just in time. Approaching from the shores of Crimea - massive fleets unload nearly a hundred thousand soldiers into the unprotected Golden Horde territory.
The Normandy's levy also exploited the hardly used route in the north.
The beast is surrounded.
As the Horde's stronghold fall one after another, the Khan grew desperate and sent his 50,000 strong army on a wild chase for Jerusalem's army.
A showdown between two smaller armies proved pivotal - the first Jerusalem's victory in open battle against the Horde.
But time is running out. As the Jerusalem's 20,000 strong army holds off wave after wave of attack, the 50,000 strong - Horde finally turns towards them - there is no escape.
NO SURRENDER, NO RETREAT!
As the 50,000 horde prepare to descend upon the outnumbered Jews, a sudden horn was blown! THE WAR IS OVER!
The Khan's treasury finally ran dry and he concedes defeat -
A historical moment in Jerusalem's lineage! Much like the founder of the Kingdom, William di Normandie to Jerusalem, Henry is crowned King of Poland.
His first act was to pick a potato off the ground and declared it as 'Jerusalem's Potato.'
The Year is 1334
A new chapter of Potato is about to unfold.
Reforming Potato
Alas, the old King is too old to fulfill his promise of taking back half of the Potatoland being held by the Holy Roman Empire.
The task was passed down to his niece, Helewisa - a genius married to a genius.
Her first act? Proving that she has the balls to take on the Holy Roman Empire.
Massive levies make headway into the Roman territory and overwhelmed them, all in all, 75000 roman troops fell in battle.
The concession meant Poland regained much of her de jure territories not nearly all, but enough for the time being.
But the significance of this victory proved that Jerusalem is very much capable of taking on most superpowers sans alliances.
They even left a farewell present to the Holy Roman Empire.
A new Emperor. The rest of Europe is terrified by this open display of foreign intervention.
Who will they meddle with next?
Another superpower, of course.
The task was passed down to his niece, Helewisa - a genius married to a genius.
Her first act? Proving that she has the balls to take on the Holy Roman Empire.
Massive levies make headway into the Roman territory and overwhelmed them, all in all, 75000 roman troops fell in battle.
The concession meant Poland regained much of her de jure territories not nearly all, but enough for the time being.
But the significance of this victory proved that Jerusalem is very much capable of taking on most superpowers sans alliances.
They even left a farewell present to the Holy Roman Empire.
A new Emperor. The rest of Europe is terrified by this open display of foreign intervention.
Who will they meddle with next?
Another superpower, of course.
How many campaigns have you gone through?
Troll of Thrones
1350 - Jerusalem declares war upon the Byzantines. A second nightmare.
The War for the Norman Basileus begins with a massive levy from Jerusalem. The minor counties outside of Byzantine's influence will suffer their wrath.
While the Elite Retinue invades from the west.
Thousands of Greek soldiers fall upon the Retinue of Fury, but with superior numbers and constant levy reinforcements the Greeks just cannot make a lasting victory.
And soon, Byzantine ran out of manpower. The great Empire brought to its knees.
But Queen Helewisa's time grew short.
Yet Byzantine is crumbling, her vassals, encouraged by their liege's weakness begin to revolt. Victory is close.
Save for a massive shock rebel army, numbering 40,000!
We respond with our massive levy - taking down them down with heavy casualty.
Alas, the Queen will not survive to witness this historic victory.
Her son, will carry on her work. Creating the greatest troll moment ever in Byzantine's history.
As a Norman Catholic Basileus - Fraunk de Normandie takes the Crown of Byzantine Empire.
The War for the Norman Basileus begins with a massive levy from Jerusalem. The minor counties outside of Byzantine's influence will suffer their wrath.
While the Elite Retinue invades from the west.
Thousands of Greek soldiers fall upon the Retinue of Fury, but with superior numbers and constant levy reinforcements the Greeks just cannot make a lasting victory.
And soon, Byzantine ran out of manpower. The great Empire brought to its knees.
But Queen Helewisa's time grew short.
Yet Byzantine is crumbling, her vassals, encouraged by their liege's weakness begin to revolt. Victory is close.
Save for a massive shock rebel army, numbering 40,000!
We respond with our massive levy - taking down them down with heavy casualty.
Alas, the Queen will not survive to witness this historic victory.
Her son, will carry on her work. Creating the greatest troll moment ever in Byzantine's history.
As a Norman Catholic Basileus - Fraunk de Normandie takes the Crown of Byzantine Empire.
1. Iceland Duke - Tutorial
2. Doux of Cyprus - played till 1453 - learned how to serve liege properly - taking sides in revolts - breaking out of the one island setup etc.
3. Earl of Isle of Man - How to survive as independent, switch sides thrice, saving Scotland, destroying Scotland, and become the Emperor of Britannia till 1453 - capitalizing on the collapse of the Golden Horde
4. William the Bastard - now playing.
Mud on your face, Big Disgrace
1364 - A massive mercenary army gathers in Poland. Destiny beckons.
The Kingdom of Jerusalem is poised to slay the Golden Beast in one fell swoop.
No one will deny Henry his claim to the Golden Throne.
The horde's forces, greatly diminished by infighting and decades of wars - musters for one last stand in Vitebsk.
Sensing an early setback - Crusaders were called for first time in centuries in the service of Jerusalem.
DEUS VULT!
Die you miserable spawn of satans! ALL BOW TO THE TRUE GOLDEN EMPEROR!
But time is running out...
The Khan will not surrender without a fight - a total subjugation is necessary. The Soldiers of Jerusalem redoubles their effort!
And made it - just in time.
The King could barely stand on the day of ceremony, but he knew - he will ascend - much closer to heaven from now on.
As every corner of his empire's vassals gather and pay respect to the new Emperor. Emperor. For centuries this title has eluded him. He went searching in France, Holy Roman Empire, Byzantine, but he found it in the unlikeliest of places.
ALL HAIL HENRY III THE EMPEROR OF GOLDEN HORDE!
MAY HIS REIGN BE EVERLASTING!
The year is 1366 - The a new Emperor ascends!
1364 - A massive mercenary army gathers in Poland. Destiny beckons.
The Kingdom of Jerusalem is poised to slay the Golden Beast in one fell swoop.
No one will deny Henry his claim to the Golden Throne.
The horde's forces, greatly diminished by infighting and decades of wars - musters for one last stand in Vitebsk.
Sensing an early setback - Crusaders were called for first time in centuries in the service of Jerusalem.
DEUS VULT!
Die you miserable spawn of satans! ALL BOW TO THE TRUE GOLDEN EMPEROR!
But time is running out...
The Khan will not surrender without a fight - a total subjugation is necessary. The Soldiers of Jerusalem redoubles their effort!
And made it - just in time.
The King could barely stand on the day of ceremony, but he knew - he will ascend - much closer to heaven from now on.
As every corner of his empire's vassals gather and pay respect to the new Emperor. Emperor. For centuries this title has eluded him. He went searching in France, Holy Roman Empire, Byzantine, but he found it in the unlikeliest of places.
ALL HAIL HENRY III THE EMPEROR OF GOLDEN HORDE!
MAY HIS REIGN BE EVERLASTING!
The year is 1366 - The a new Emperor ascends!
CaptainAwesome
Arcane
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2011
- Messages
- 845
For the emperor!
May his reign last forever!
May his sword fail him never!
May his reign last forever!
May his sword fail him never!
Three words: Agnatic-Gavelkind. Infirm.
CaptainAwesome
Arcane
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2011
- Messages
- 845
Why
CaptainAwesome
Arcane
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2011
- Messages
- 845
Comrade Goby
Magister
- Joined
- Apr 29, 2011
- Messages
- 1,236
Apparently the ASoIaF mod for this is great
That being said this game has too many menus
That being said this game has too many menus
I dont have 10 years. lol
CaptainAwesome
Arcane
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2011
- Messages
- 845
ITZ cumming
You're going to have to do it all over again.
Unite the empire, this time with some actual fucking succession laws goddamn.
That or kill all your children except one.
The Bigger you are...
With the forced subjugation of the Golden Horde, the newly crowned Emperor will have to contend with angry vassals. Some were pliable with gold - others... we simply have to let go. Give them a taste of freedom - for in time we will retake whatever they have taken away with them, easily.
When all is said and done, it does not seem we have lost anything of importance.
And the conversion can begin, to the one True Faith.
However, some still wishes to break free.
Attempting to resurrect the 'true' Golden Horde by way of barbarians and savages -
Jerusalem cannot face them all at once. A few assassins would have to suffice.
While the Emperor prepares his entry into the Kingdom of Heaven.
For a year, Jerusalem lets the plunder of the Empire goes unabated. The greedy horde ravaged whatever they can, pleased with the sight of the retreating retinues.
The Empress passes away - and now the Emperor can marry again.
Amidst the chaos there is bliss. For there is light at the end of the tunnel....
The traitors scattered in all direction once their head is cut off. The mending can begin anew.
When all is said and done, it does not seem we have lost anything of importance.
And the conversion can begin, to the one True Faith.
However, some still wishes to break free.
Attempting to resurrect the 'true' Golden Horde by way of barbarians and savages -
Jerusalem cannot face them all at once. A few assassins would have to suffice.
While the Emperor prepares his entry into the Kingdom of Heaven.
For a year, Jerusalem lets the plunder of the Empire goes unabated. The greedy horde ravaged whatever they can, pleased with the sight of the retreating retinues.
The Empress passes away - and now the Emperor can marry again.
Amidst the chaos there is bliss. For there is light at the end of the tunnel....
The traitors scattered in all direction once their head is cut off. The mending can begin anew.
CaptainAwesome
Arcane
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2011
- Messages
- 845
Goddamn man.
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