Another one kaught today, itz all over the paperz. "Teenager
arrested in software piracy skandal", "kourier arrested after distributing
warez"...
Damn Kidz. They're all alike.
But did u, in u're 3-piece psychology and 1950's technobrain, ever take
a look behind the eyez of a kourier? Did u ever wonder what made him tick,
what forcez shaped him, what may have molded him?
I am a kourier, enter my world...
Mine iz a world that beginz with skool... I'm not the smartezt kid in
the class, I don't quite get this education thing...
Damn underachiever. They're all alike.
I'm in cosmetology skool or kommunity college. I've listened to
teacherz explain for the fifteenth time how to reduce a fraction, and I still
don't understand it. "No Ms. Smith, I didn't show my work. I don't get how
u type with these pencil things. Give me a joystick or something."
Damn kid. Must be a druggie. They're all alike.
I make a discovery today. I found a computer. Wait a second, this is
cool. I can play commander keen all i want. If i loose a game, it's because
i didn't get the 0-day eleet game c0dez. Not because it doesn't like me...
Or feelz i'm a worthless inbred skumbag...
Or thinkz i'm an idiot...
Or doesn't like teaching and is threatened by my good looks...
Damn kid. All he duz is play doom. They're all alike.
And then it happened... a door opened to a new world... rushing thru
the fone line like heroin thru an addict's veinz, the latest version of DOS is
sent out at a bazillion baud, a refuge from intelligence is sought... a 0-day
warez board is found!
"This is it... this is where i belong!"
I know everyone here... even if i've never met them, never talked to
them, never traded apogee with them, may never hear from them again... i know
u all...
Damn kid. Tying up the fone line again. They're all alike...
U bet u're ass we're all alike... we've been spoon-fed baby food at
skool when we hungered for ANSI and codez... the bitz of meat u did let slip
thru were a little on the well done side and i had a little trouble digesting
them. We've been dominated by intellectualz, or ignored by dum skolar dudez.
The few that had something to teach talked in some fancee shmancee english
language or something, and i wouldn't know what they were talking about anyway.
This is our world now... the world of the kode and the console copier,
the beauty of the file point. We make use of some telefone thing or something
for free with codez so we don't have to pay to trade -15 day gamez and the
latest ANSI releases, and u kall us kriminals. We trade credit cards... and
U call us kriminals. We distribute copyrighted software... and u call us
criminals. We steal games from radio shack... and u call us criminals. We
exist without skin color, (cuz we're always inside downloading and uploading)
without religious bias, (cuz we have know idea that the hell religios bias is)
without intelligence... and u kall us criminals. U start wars and stuff, yet
we're the kriminals.
Yes, I am a criminal. My crime is that of stupidity. My crime is that
of judging people by how much they upload and how k-rad they're typing is, not
what they look like or if they can spell they're name right the first time
without messing up. My crime is that of stealing u're work and putting my name
On it, and u get all huffy puffy about it.
I am a kourier, and this is my manifesto. U may stop one moron, but
U can't stop us all! After all, we're all alike.