Duke Nukem Forever - Gold

[Demnogonis Saastuttaja]

'Biscuit's right, Duke has died, and then he's been raised as an ugly frankenstein monster with the worst bits from everything. Duke Forever is a corridor shooter with health regen, where the challenge comes from duke being a pussy that can't run, can't jump, can't take hits and can't deal damage. And the game is ugly, and it has no music. This isn't duke at all, this is just plain shit.

It seems Serious Sam was the last game that climbed the duke/doom hill and succeeded. And to think how cool shooters they could make today... Hey we have advanced quite a bit in technology, so why not make only shit 'cuz that's easy. After all, this is just a job.

 

[Renegen]

A fairly good review of the game, and with someone that speaks decently, too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q86vWgaLuwE


Edit: He even mentions the decline of gaming in the end.

I closed the window as soon as I saw it was that Total Biscuit moron. Sorry, can't stand him.

That's a shame, because he gives some very well-articulated criticism of the game, the current genre direction and the industry as a whole.

What's your issue with the guy, has he derped about something in a massive manner?

The problem with these incredibly popular LPers is that they got this way by playing WoW, Starcraft 2, CoD etc

This guy isn't too bad when he isn't posting WoW or SC2 videos, which is 95% of the time.

 

[Angthoron]

Well, I do know that he got his popularity from being just about the only watchable WoW Cataclysm presenter. Still, I don't know if that alone should make someone's opinion invalid especially if he hasn't been full-retard previously (and I don't know if he has - at least his comments in DNF videos are spot-on and I only saw this and a few of his Cataclysm previews, which were actually also with some valid critique back then).

 

[JarlFrank]

Holy shit this is bad.

Shit performance, especially compared to how the game looks, shitty FOV with fucking oversized weapons.
Most of the stuff I've seen yet was pointless gimmicks, gameplay is lacklustre, shooting doesn't feel like it has a punch behind it, and WHAT IS IT WITH ONLY 2 WEAPONS FFS.

Also what the fuck is it with loading screen tips like "If you get stuck you can cheat by looking at FAQs online!" and "When you get shot at, try dodging the bullets!" What the fuck do they think the players are really that retarded or what.

 

[Multidirectional]

Also what the fuck is it with loading screen tips like "If you get stuck you can cheat by looking at FAQs online!" and "When you get shot at, try dodging the bullets!" What the fuck do they think the players are really that retarded or what.

Uh.. are you joking? Those loading screen tips are obviously meant to be humorous. Actually the only humorous parts I found in this game were few of these loading tips.

 

[MetalCraze]

He is german

 

[JarlFrank]

They're not that funny. Also, since it's so consolized I wouldn't be surprised if it was meant seriously.

 

[Multidirectional]

They're not that funny.

Not the point. Shit jokes are still jokes. And loading screen tips are pretty obvious jokes.

 

[JaySn]

Duke NUkem has become a little bastard, fully aware of just how funny he is (or so he believes).

2K must be destroyed!

 

[Angthoron]

Jesus people nothing can please you, not the revival of an old awesome franchise of oldschool shooter action done faithfully to the spirit of duke, nor the cool jokes and cock monsters, and not even the self-referential humor. The fuck is wrong with you now.

 

[I.C. Wiener]

They're not that funny. Also, since it's so consolized I wouldn't be surprised if it was meant seriously.

They're not funny because the joke is on you for taking it seriously.

 

[JaySn]

We're not 12 years old anymore.

The magic is gone.

Everything is shit.

Duke Nukem is shit. Now excuse me while I go load up the HD release of Duke Nukem 3D . . . or just play the platformer.

 

[Metro]

A fairly good review of the game, and with someone that speaks decently, too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q86vWgaLuwE


Edit: He even mentions the decline of gaming in the end.

I closed the window as soon as I saw it was that Total Biscuit moron. Sorry, can't stand him.

That's a shame, because he gives some very well-articulated criticism of the game, the current genre direction and the industry as a whole.

What's your issue with the guy, has he derped about something in a massive manner?

I guess I just disagree that he gives any meaningful criticism -- at least in the half dozen or so reviews I watched him do.

 

[Interesting]

It felt like playing Redneck Rampage or Postal.

Postal!

When you start to feel bad about yourself for playing this.

That describes how bad it is.

 

[Tel Velothi]

Duke Nukem 3D also had stupid humour (ofc better than in DNF) - sometimes funny but stupid nevertheless, it was a good game though.
But I prefer Blood with it's dark humour, most bad-ass character ever (dat quotes) and atmospheric levels.

 

[Luzur]

i uninstalled the game and watched the rest on youtube.

seems it was the best i could have done.

also, hints of a Duke 5 at the ending.

 

[Metro]

Borderlands is a better FPS -- which is saying something.

 

[JarlFrank]

Also, what is it with the overabundance of QTEs. PRESS SPACE REPEATEDLY TO FORCE OPEN THIS DOOR

 

[Darth Roxor]

Also, what is it with the overabundance of QTEs. PRESS SPACE REPEATEDLY TO FORCE OPEN THIS DOOR

But it was okay in 2witcher, what are you whining about

 

[torpid]

Also, what is it with the overabundance of QTEs. PRESS SPACE REPEATEDLY TO FORCE OPEN THIS DOOR

But it was okay in 2witcher, what are you whining about

Roxor fighting the good fight

 

[Admiral jimbob]

Yeah, I never saw anyone complaining about those

 

[Shannow]

He is a nazi

Fixed. Because I had no problem understanding that those were supposed to be jokes. Didn't find them funny, though. I'm German after all.

But it was okay in 2witcher, what are you whining about

No. No, they're not. They're a fucking abomination. I still can't believe that TW2 is supposed to be a PC only release. It feels so much like a port... But I still like the game overall (Just far removed from the next Gothic 2 that it could have been.)

 

[Excommunicator]

A fairly good review of the game, and with someone that speaks decently, too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q86vWgaLuwE


Edit: He even mentions the decline of gaming in the end.

I closed the window as soon as I saw it was that Total Biscuit moron. Sorry, can't stand him.

Very informative video. I'm glad I watched, as it has eliminated all remnants of curiosity I had for this game. The 30 minutes of playing shown in that video come across as some of the most boring 30 minutes I've ever seen in an FPS.

Monster truck driving over jumps? What is this shit? I couldn't really imagine it would turn out this bad.

 

[JarlFrank]

Yeah, Witcher 2 QTEs were pretty bad. But at least you could deactivate the worst ones in the menu, and they weren't as frequent as in DNF (seriously, a tap spacebar QTE for every second door?)