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EA announces Dante's Inferno Action-Adventure

racofer

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zorg.jpg
 

Darth Roxor

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In other news, Dante has been acknowledged to wield two three-metres-long swords, has a spiky, blonde haircut and spills out quality one-liners from Clint Eastwood westerns while hacking through the hordes of deadly sinners in the first circle of hell only to end his journey with a God of War 'mash the buttons according to appearing arrows' epic fight with Lucifer and his brood: Judas, Brutus and Cassius.
 

Herbert West

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There's a chance it's going to be ok. I've dully calculated it to be about 0.0000000000000056%.

As much as I liked Dead Space for what it was, frankly, those guys are too ham-fisted to ever even attempt adapting Dante's Inferno.... I'm extremely sceptical. On the other hand, it's a better source of inspiration than, for example, 1997 "Soldier Boyz" starring Michael Dudikoff.... Nah! I'll settle for generic *facepalm* ITZ GONA PHAIL!!1
 

Bluebottle

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Dead State Wasteland 2
What's the betting that they conveniently forget Canto XXVIII, where Mohammed is evicerated in the eighth circle for all eternity for being a rabble rouser?

TBH I was thinking of making an adventure game (traditional point and click) loosely based
around Dante's vision of hell, there's no way you could even do that for the actual
story and remain in any way faithful though. The book is just Dante being shown the circles
of hell and hearing the stories of Florentine contemporaries who ended up there. There's no input
from Dante, he's just a passive witness. You could maybe play Virgil and have to parley
with various Hell guardians at points to allow passage, but even that's a stretch.
 

Durwyn

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We have a special sentence in poland for describing this kind of things: O Kurwa, Ja pierdole!
 

baronjohn

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Bluebottle said:
What's the betting that they conveniently forget Canto XXVIII, where Mohammed is evicerated in the eighth circle for all eternity for being a rabble rouser?
O propheta, certe penis tuus caelum versus erectus est!
 

WhiskeyWolf

RPG Codex Polish Car Thief
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O Kurwa, Ja pierdole!

Going back to English:

What the fuck are they thinking?!? Someone kill them please!
 
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Marcel Proust's In Search Of Lost Time: An EPIC fast-paced TPP shooter with frantic action and matrix-styled dodging.

It is certain now, humanity is beyond saving
 

Darth Roxor

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TimDaEnchantah said:
Marcel Proust's In Search Of The Lost Time: An EPIC fast-paced TPP shooter with frantic action and matrix-styled dodging.

It is certain now, humanity is beyond saving

I fukken lol'd :lol:
 

The Feral Kid

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"Dante accompanied by his only allies Virgil, a brash young outlaw who saved his life, and Beatrice, the beautiful warrior maiden promised to him since birth".
 

JarlFrank

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Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag.
a Third-Person Action/Adventure adaptation of the medieval epic poem The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri.

...
What?
Human culture is doomed.

I wonder how it will turn out. And I wonder how the press will react to it. Yes, especially the mainstream gaming press. It will show a true decline of human culture.
 

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