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Grimoire Thread

Joined
Mar 15, 2014
Messages
683
I feel like that about all great games :) Shame I only ever found a handful like that!
There is indeed only a handful of games which had a similar attraction for me, Ultima VII maybe, World of Xeen, Gothic II, Baldur's Gate 1 or Dark Disciples II. But no game entertained me for such a long period of time and on such a constantly high level like Grimoire.
 

Baxander

Augur
Joined
Jul 10, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Brisbane, Australia
The achievement was surviving until the game came out. Your buddy fucked it up.

His cancer was aggressive, but he still survived 5 years after diagnosis. In those 5 years, Cleve paid some guy to make cheap clipart as NPC placeholders and had multiple people throwing money at him for NO PROGRESS.
He said the price would never drop. NO PRICECUTS ON THIS GLORIOUS GAME!
You can't even give it away. Total BOMB. If you add up the 14+ years he worked on the game, then figure up total sales, he probably averaged about 5$ an hour.
NEW VIDEO COMING ON MEMORIAL DAY......!!!!!!!!!
 

Baxander

Augur
Joined
Jul 10, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Brisbane, Australia
I'm not that BOI.
I'm going to shave my fucking nuts and go full fucking POWERSLAVE come Monday.
This video needs to be seen by the world.
Crpg fans who have been BURNED by this trainwreck MUST KNOW.
 

Baxander

Augur
Joined
Jul 10, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Brisbane, Australia
Would you say that if your friend hadn't been rotting from the inside already, Grimoire would have given him cancer?

Honestly, maybe.
The clipart alone could be linked to various cases of nausea, vomiting, and many pregnant mothers have lost their children in the womb after viewing the shot graphics for extended periods.
Several studies have shown that the inability to get fullscreen for almost a year after release caused various types of cancers of the brain.
Add the unbalanced gameplay and endless array of amateur bugs and inept programming, and you have a bonafide cancer causing host.
 

Baxander

Augur
Joined
Jul 10, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Brisbane, Australia
What should the theme of the video be?
ASMR
Educational (you fuckers need to LEARN)
Emo/Joyless
Splattercore (Screaming throughout)
Storybook (Read through the eyes of a 'character's, the characters being the spirit of my friend Tim, Cleve's son (antagonist) and VOIVOD (the narrator me)
 

Sinder Velvin

Arcane
Joined
Dec 8, 2005
Messages
366
If you add up the 14+ years he worked on the game, then figure up total sales, he probably averaged about 5$ an hour.

That's like complaining that the people who made Stonehenge worked for less than minimum wage.

Some endeavors are done for a greater purpose or calling. Not everything has to be a product.

His cancer was aggressive, but he still survived 5 years after diagnosis.

Did your friend at least mention the game in his dying words? If not, maybe you're blowing things way out of proportion.

In those 5 years, Cleve paid some guy to make cheap clipart as NPC placeholders and had multiple people throwing money at him for NO PROGRESS.

Why are you so sure of this? Sometimes you need to spend a long time thinking about a project like this, which is still progress.
 

TheImplodingVoice

Dumbfuck!
Dumbfuck
Joined
Oct 29, 2018
Messages
1,955
Location
Embelyon
If you add up the 14+ years he worked on the game, then figure up total sales, he probably averaged about 5$ an hour.

That's like complaining that the people who made Stonehenge worked for less than minimum wage.

Some endeavors are done for a greater purpose or calling. Not everything has to be a product.

His cancer was aggressive, but he still survived 5 years after diagnosis.

Did your friend at least mention the game in his dying words? If not, maybe you're blowing things way out of proportion.

In those 5 years, Cleve paid some guy to make cheap clipart as NPC placeholders and had multiple people throwing money at him for NO PROGRESS.

Why are you so sure of this? Sometimes you need to spend a long time thinking about a project like this, which is still progress.
I.......I.......I believe in Cleve
 

Zed Duke of Banville

Dungeon Master
Patron
Joined
Oct 3, 2015
Messages
11,756
Eagerly awaiting the importation of my party into Grimoire II: Exemplars of the Heraldic Wings

EZel7Jg.png
 

Baxander

Augur
Joined
Jul 10, 2014
Messages
234
Location
Brisbane, Australia
The first time I saw the game I thought, "My God Tim would be amazed..."
But then I walked through that shitty, disney-esque starting forest, the little fairies and every fantasy trope known to man just fucking SCREAMING in my face, "HEY LOOK AT ME!". But all I could see was the shitty UI for inventory, the quirky cartoony bullshit, the tone deaf midi music, all of it... SLAPPIMG MY DEAD FRIEND IN THE FACE!!
Then the taunts came, the THREATS! My hometown living in fear from this babbling maniac, this intrepid, middle-aged construction worker who wears a GOD DAMN FANNY PACK....it was horrendous. Others reaching out to me about the BULLYING they experienced.
I bought the game, tears streaming down my face, KNOWING THIS WOULD BE WHAT TIM WANTED. BUT IT WAS ALL A LETDOWN! He promised us an epic game, it was a mobile phone game in disguise. The money donated to crowdfunding...FOR WHAT.
And Stones of Arnhem, oh yes, STONES OF ARNHEM, the game he RUINED with his antics! The game Tim could have played if he had not ruined it with HIS DILDO PRANKS!!!
This Coors Light is for you Tim, fucking Grimoire will RISE AGAIN.....AS THE GAME YOU WANTED!
 

Generic-Giant-Spider

Guest
One of the many people who melted down when they heard of the 'thal.

Cleveland Mark Blakemore HUMBLED this man so decisively he deleted all Grimoire related content from his channel and has become another Hearthstone player.



Makes you think about life, don't it. One day you have hundreds of subscribers, then you get all bigheaded and come swinging with T-Rex arms at the 'Thal... now you're just an irrelevant content creator using his sister's paypal for e-begging to whatever 25 subscribers will listen.

That's hard times, nigga. And I'm eating beans out of a can.
 

Zed Duke of Banville

Dungeon Master
Patron
Joined
Oct 3, 2015
Messages
11,756
This is beautiful.

Are these the pre-made quick start characters? I recall some of them from when I played.
I created all 8 of my characters, but relied on Grimoire's random name generator for all but one (Mad Dax), so there might be some overlap with the quick start characters.
 

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