Kodex Kommunistic Kolony in Rimworld, Season 1

[Azira]

My choice? I'm not going to get Champ alone. Nope. Will scavenge whatever supplies I can, then return and keep watch over you two. Once we all are mobile, then we can decide what next to do.

 

[Dreaad]

Well at least if people start freezing to death during the winter, you know where to get an inferno canon

 

[Kalin]

Hey, while he's out there maybe Azira could shoot some space deer and make me a sandwich. Also holy fuck, mecha crawlers with miniguns and mega blades, science has gone too far I say. This better be reflected in our pay!

 

[laclongquan]

The world is your oyster~

 

[Dayyālu]

1) The Noble Sacrifice of the Warg was enough to stop a mecha. The other two are still alive and operational, nay? Or they went "booom in the night"?

2) Withdraw and Regroup is the wisest option if the Mechas are still around. We lack food, true? And medical supplies?

3) About Champion, the important stuff is still in one piece. We can rebuild him, I bet. Mecha Dog.

Red Alert told me that Soviet Cyber Dogs are both true and the best thing ever.

http://cnc.wikia.com/wiki/Chitzkoi

And about Grimmie going down screaming propaganda.

 

[Bliblablubb]

Dayum, I always arrive too late for your LPs. And once again all hope rests on Azira's shoulders... I am seeing a disturbing pattern here.

Even tho I can already hear the game preloading the "GAME OVER" screen from the files, I'd still like to apply for being a dorf Kommucolonist. Maybe this time I can be more than just an instakilled beefcake.

 

[Azira]

Hey, don't you think Grimwulf does this on purpose? So he can blame me when everything goes pear-shaped?

Regardless, I've volounteered for scapegoat duty before, and it is a duty I'm proud to honour.

 

[Bliblablubb]

Don't you dare trying to shift blame to captain commissar comrade Grimwulf! He is always right. Your lack of pilot skills blew up the proud (and not fully paid off) SS Codex, and your lack of medic skills better not lead to the premature demise of our beloved future chairman! And that other guy there.
Now hush and find some space magic medikit to save those more equal than you.

 

[Grimwulf]

That's a lot of people to enlist. Be patient, men - we might not see a new colonist for quite some time. RNG are all bitchy in this game, but Randy Random can be especially sadistic.

Don't get me wrong, though. I don't blame Random. I blame Codex!

First KEY CHOICE: "You sense danger behind the walls! What do you do?"
Codex: "BREAK IT WIDE OPEN, hue hue"

My choice? I'm not going to get Champ alone. Nope. Will scavenge whatever supplies I can, then return and keep watch over you two. Once we all are mobile, then we can decide what next to do.

Poor Champ.

1) The Noble Sacrifice of the Warg was enough to stop a mecha. The other two are still alive and operational, nay? Or they went "booom in the night"?

The bladed mechos, scyther, was downed. He will lay on that spot immobile until one of us comes over and puts an end to his misery. The two giant centipedes were sorta damaged in fires and explosions, but they don't really give a damn.

Edit: nevermind, the scyther was destroyed in fire.

2) Withdraw and Regroup is the wisest option if the Mechas are still around. We lack food, true? And medical supplies?

We don't have anything. Grimwulf and Kalin are wreathing in agony on a cold, cold marble floor of some ancient household with hastlily crafted door. Azira tends to some wounds using his bare hands, old socks, and the power of yolo. Most of all we need some food and medicine, but also building materials and wood for starting campfire. The night will be cold.

3) About Champion, the important stuff is still in one piece. We can rebuild him, I bet. Mecha Dog.

Umm.

So let's say you'll get two bionic eyes and two prosthetic rear legs somewhere. Let's say that Azira's incredible medical skill will be enough to attach it all without killing the poor thing. The problem is he's still burning, bleeding and incapable of moving. He's suffering for you, heartless basterds!

And about Grimmie going down screaming propaganda.

It was Soviet Anthem, not propaganda. :russia:

Spoiler

United forever in friendship and labor,
Our mighty Republics will ever endure.
The great Soviet Union will live through the ages.
The dream of a people their fortress secure.

CHORUS:
Long live our Soviet motherland, built by the people's mighty hand.
Long live our people, united and free.
Strong in our friendship tried by fire. Long may our crimson flag inspire,
Shining in glory for all men to see.
Through days dark and stormy where great Lenin lead us
Our eyes saw the bright Sun of freedom above
and Stalin our leader with faith in the people,
Inspired us to build up the land that we love.

CHORUS:
Long live our Soviet motherland, built by the people's mighty hand.
Long live our people, united and free.
Strong in our friendship tried by fire. Long may our crimson flag inspire,
Shining in glory for all men to see.
We fought for the future, destroyed the invader,
and brought to our homeland the laurels of fame.
Our glory will live in the memory of nations
and all generations will honor her name.

CHORUS:
Long live our Soviet motherland, built by the people's mighty hand.
Long live our people, united and free.
Strong in our friendship tried by fire. Long may our crimson flag inspire,
Shining in glory for all men to see.

Hey, don't you think Grimwulf does this on purpose? So he can blame me when everything goes pear-shaped?

 

[Kalin]

HEY wait a minute, why didn't you grab some medkits, rations an sheit BEFORE knocking down the wall to fricking mechanus ITZ land... You tryin to get yer hands on my bonus!?

 

[MZeta]

I call that a successful first day . Soviet enemy ally approves and whishes best of luck:mrpresident:

 

[Azira]

Trust the 'dex to approve of decisions that lead to dwarf fortress levels of Fun!

 

[Grimwulf]

FFFFFFUUUUUUUUU

Stop screaming, will ya? I think I can feel the bullet... No, it's just your bone. Sorry.

Spoiler

Leave me be, doctor Mengele! Go save Champ!

I'm not going to get Champ alone. Nope.

Goddamn, Grimwulf. Champ is dead. Deal with it.

Spoiler

...

Spoiler

You'll be alright? You don't look too well.

Spoiler

That's exactly the thing you DON'T want to hear from your doctor.

Right. Well, the bleeding kinda stopped. Don't know why.

Spoiler

To survive the mecho encounter is an achievement by itself. But enduring Azira's tortures is a whole new level of toughness. I feel like a war hero right now.

Yes, yes, YOU'RE WELCOME! Ungrateful pricks. I'll go take a look outside. Make sure it's safe, maybe scavenge for whatever supplies I can, then return and keep watch over you two. Once we all are mobile, then we can decide what next to do.

Supplies, right. HEY wait a minute, why didn't you grab some medkits, rations an sheit BEFORE knocking down the wall to fricking mechanus ITZ land... You tryin to get yer hands on my bonus!?

Azira's Journal

A moment of silence and solitude, finally. I wonder if those space deers are edible.

Guess we'll find out eventually. Right now we have rations.

What took you so long?

"Glad you came back, Azira. Appreciate your concern, Azira. A lesser man would go away with food, but not you. You are an honorable, caring person. And a good pilot."

Spoiler

Tastes like sand and ashes.

You can crawl, right? Take care of Grimwulf for me. I want to grab more rations and scout the mechos situation before the sun sets.

Yes, doctor. I can CRAWL alright. Let me just remove your socks from my STILL BLEEDIN' WOUNDS, so that I can get closer to that crispy charcoal over there.

Spoiler

He was too young to die. Not like that, men. Not like that.

Azira's Journal

Sealing the wall? Not in the forseen future, that's for sure.

Grimwulf will be thrilled to find out that he can't bury his warg. Because there is no warg anymore. Gone, burned to ashes. Oh, well.

Guess we could try digging a tunnel from another side. Get into the building, seal OURSELVES from inside. Mmm, no. Crazy.

Found more rations. That should be enough for a day or two.

I need a drink.

Suka. *chop* Suka! *chop* Blyad!!! *chop*

Spoiler

Later that day

HOLY HELL, you scared me. Get your smoldering ass away from me, I'm trying to catch some sleep.

Spoiler

Gonna build a bed.

Azira's Journal

Grimwulf's been acting weird lately. I think he's on the verge of a mental break. Sooner or later he'll chop down all the trees around.

I wonder what is he going to chop next?

Let's check those fleshwounds, Kalin.

Eeerrmm, they healed! Yes, they totally healed. 100% recovery. No need for more treatment, doctor!

Spoiler

Huh. I knew I'm good, but never thought I'm THAT good. Guess all that's left to do for today is get comfortable.

Spoiler

These beds are so bad. My ass hurts. How can a bed be worse than a stone floor?

That's what I like about you guys. Team spirit. Appreciation. The art of gratefulness.

Thought you were supposed to scout the area. What are those mechos up to?

They aren't going anywhere. Including back inside. Sealing them seems to be quite impossible.

*sigh* Then we'll have to stay here for the time being.

Yeah, about that. We need to get out of this household, the sooner - the better.

Why is that?

Take a lucky guess.

Spoiler

Technical Explanation

I'm surprised so many never played Rimworld. The game feels so good. But anyway, explaining the problem here, coz it's hard to do in rp fashion.

Those EDGES of the map are what they are - edges of the map. We can't see anything beyond. If anything hostile decides to pay us a visit, they will appear on the edges. Being right there at the same moment is, well, unfortunate. It's usually a good idea to fortify position somewhere in the central area of the map, and expand your colony from there. Not the other way around. But we can't fortify the centre, or even come close to it.

You mean the hills over there?

Can't see anything beyond. Who knows what kind of nasty shit might jump upon us. We are too exposed here.

So what's your suggestion?

Found this place while scouting around. Check it out, to the northeast of mechos:

Spoiler

Should be managable to sneak past the centipedes on our way there.

Hm. Well, there is a stone hut, we can stay there. But to the right of it are some sort of caverns - who knows what might come out?

Thought about it. We can build a wall.

Spoiler

So? If whatever comes from the caverns will be at least as smart as us, it will break down the wall.

Thought about that too. I have a brilliant solution. We dig a tunnel.

Spoiler

Why break walls when you can go through a tunnel? Then go all the way around to get us, and...

Spoiler

Bump into this place. Just look at it - a natural chokepoint! We can easily fortify it. Throw some sandbags, setup makeshift turrels maybe. Set some traps, or landmines, or whatnot.

Spoiler

I don't know. Looks like too much work for almost no gain. Kinda like my last job.

Let's not forget the geyser.

Spoiler

If we only knew how to construct a geothermal generator, imagine the possibilities!

Eh.

You have other suggestions, Kalin?

How about doing the same RIGHT HERE?

Spoiler

Where do you plan to get that many materials for a wall like this?

Will take more time, but who cares? Won't have to sneak past centipedes. And we've already stored some scavenged stuff right here. Why do you want to haul it all the way to your place?

We can start with the tunnel for shortcut purposes.

Spoiler

Time passed, 'Dexers argued. First day on this planet was coming to an end.

Spoiler

Goddamit. Say something, Burning Man! What do you think? We relocate to Azira's place or stay here?

We take back what is rightfully ours.

The wages?

We go back and kill every last mech fucker. They will pay for what they've done.

I mean. They are somewhat damaged an' all.

Spoiler

But come fucking on, Grim. We barely survived today.

Hit and run. Fire and take cover. Move around, give them no quarter. I'll use the scrap from their corpses to make a statue in Champ's honour.

Now that I think of it, most of the good salvage from shipwreck is laying around those mechos. Including all medicine. If we don't get it back somehow, we'll be left without meds. Among other stuff.

Let's all take a deep breath and take a nap. We can make our final decision in the morning.

Later that night.

*psst*

*whispers* what?

*whispers* I think Grim is about to go mental. How about we lock him up, just in case? For our safety, and his own?

 

[Azira]

Maybe Kalin and Azira should relocate, while Grimwulf goes bananas?


I vote (naturally) for my option. Fortifying the natural cavern, complete with a wall and a detour tunnel.

 

[Kalin]

Best would be the center, but those machine demons are barely scratched and they went through fire and sheit! Doubt we could take em out without some serious firepower.

I say stick where it's safe, I don't need the medicines anyway!

Some modificaishun tho:

modificaishun

Can't we build like this boss, skip some slog?

Also could make a crazy pit commanders quarters for Grimwulf, ya know, to "supervise" the northern front.

 

[Grimwulf]

Can't we build like this boss, skip some slog?

Hm, yes. That's actually smarter. I need some random voices/opinions on the whole matter, before we make teh final decision.

Maybe Kalin and Azira should relocate, while Grimwulf goes bananas?

Also could make a crazy pit commanders quarters for Grimwulf, ya know, to "supervise" the northern front.

Several ways to do it.
1. You can seal me in some cave with a bunch of rations. But it will probably lead nowhere. I'll be gettin' more and more crazy, eventually starve to death.
2. You can arrest and lock me inside any building nearby. Or make a separate room in where we are. One of you should visit me every day for chatting and feeding. I'll probably get better one day. However, I will most likely resist the attempt to arrest me. No telling how this ends. Kalin can use a knife, but it might kill me.
3. Just ignore the matter. Maybe I'll be fine. Maybe I'll go nuts, but in a peaceful manner. Or maybe I'll strangle you both in your sleep. Or attack fucking mechoes with my bare balls.
4(?) You could relocate/hide, like Azira offered. But I might find you.

Anyway, be more specific on your decision about my fate.

 

[hello friend]

Seems to me like this LP could be over pretty soon if you go with the assault option. What if Grim goes nuts in the middle of such a delicate situation? The supplies from the wreckage would be a boon, it's true - but with one combatant well wounded and a dog down it'll be hard going up against the ancient horrors (2300+yo trololol). Need time to build strength. With Azira's plan there's a chance some mystery menace wanders in, solves the problem, and wanders on. While also being easiest to build. Both 'safe' plans require a tunnel, and post-tunnel cavern area base is fastest, least effort option. PLUS have a backup hideyhole in case of future distress.

 

[Grimwulf]

What if Grim goes nuts in the middle of such a delicate situation?

Seriously? I was VOMITING UNDER MINIGUN BARRAGE!

What other proof of my invincibility do you need?

 

[Kalin]

Good idea about tricking enemies to fight each other!

I still say put Grim in his own room for now, no need to make it a jail unless he goes full psycho. Crowding and sheit seems to be a big downer. Assuming the pain stops, he might just be okay!

I warmed up those socks real gud, so his wounds should heal just fine. Will probably still look like Darkman, but what can ya do.

 

[Ulminati]

Looking promising. Feel free to drop me in with whatever traits you deem most entertaining

 

[Grimwulf]

Can't sleep.

Spoiler

Gotta protect the colony.

Spoiler

TAKE THIS! *bang* FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU! *bang bang*

You hear that, Kalin?

Gunshots. Where is the Dork Knight?

Spoiler

*spits* A death well deserved.

Spoiler

Grimwulf, for fucks sake. What was that?

They were planning an invasion. I had to act first. Pure self-defence.

You are not a... pleasant... person, Grimwulf. Can we get some sleep now?

Spoiler

2nd of Fall 5500

Mornin', men. Why didn't you wake me up? And where did the third bed go? Wait a second. When did you fix that building?

*Clears throat* Let's all remain calm and be reasonable. Grimwulf, you see...

It's for your own damn good.

Spoiler

Wat? Wait, did you... WHY YOU TREACHEROUS FUCKS! I WILL KILL YOU ALL!!

Spoiler

Oh shit, oh shit

Spoiler

COULD USE SOME HELP OVER HERE, AZIRA!

Fuck fuck, COMING! YOLO!

Spoiler

Dis all you got? *Spits blood* You cursed traitors, I'll get up and tear your guts, I swear.

You alive over there, Azira?

*Huff* In one piece, yeah.

Spoiler

Old man has a mean lef punch, eh?

Spoiler

Did you really have to cut him with a knife? Let's drag him to the, err, chilling zone.

I will let the deers rape you this night. Then I kill you. And the deers. And the centipedes. And myself.

Spoiler

That's very sweet, Grim. Now. Another busy day for Doctor Azira.

Spoiler

Kalin's Notes

I had to accept Azira's plan when he threatened full medical examination. Now the task at hand is to "go dig a tunnel real fast". I'm no fucking miner, you prick. Well, gotta do my best.

Hrrrmmmmpff. Granite. Hard as my own balls. Also found remains of some ancient machinery.

Could be useful. We'll need components to assemble complex devices like turrets, generators or various electronics.

Azira bothers me.

Been lying on the ground, staring into clouds with blank eyes. Probably misses Space. Probably about to go mental, just like Grimwulf. Gotta keep an eye on him.

Azira.

Kalin.

Spoiler

Last ration pack?

Can't scavenge any more without being shredded and/or incinerated by the centipedes.

Great. Now what?

Would you kindly let me take a break? I've been patching you both during the last two days, and took a beating from our visionary leader for my loyal service.

Oh, so you are in pain? Let me SEE WHAT I CAN DO ABOUT IT

Spoiler

AAAAARRRRHHH

There, all done!

It hurts more than before.

Which means that you are recovering! Anyway, what do we do with our food situation?

Grimwulf killed a deer for no reason. We could chop and cook it.

So what are we waiting for?

I need to take a nap. And none of us can cook anyway, we need Grimwulf. I don't want to get myself a food poisoning from your cooking.

We also need a butcher table and tools, right?

I could make everything that's necessary, but I need materials. We've chopped down all beefy trees, there's no more wood left. Unless you snatch it from the centipedes.

Phah! Go find another fool.

The wood is more or less safe to get. It's scattered on a decent distance away from them. You can do it. Or we can starve to death - whatever suits you.

"Go and beat Grimwulf's flaming butt". "Go and dig through granite". "Go and sneak past murderous centipedes". I'd better get a bonus today!

Kalin's Notes

Can't decide whom do I hate more: Grimwulf or Azira.

Just kiddin'. Grimwulf beats all records.

If anybody finds these notes, I was obliterated by centipedes. Avenge my death - kill Grimwulf and Azira. Thanks in advance.

I DID IT!

Centipedes didn't even give a flying fuck. Can't believe that old idiot managed to get shot AND incinerated while doing the same thing.

Also, I'm 70% sure I've stepped on his vomit. Well, back to mining granite.

Later this evening.

Dun-dun-durun, gutting this pussy like a boss, *mumbles a disturbing slavic tune*

Spoiler

That's how you do shashlik.

Spoiler

Wh-what the fuck?

Spoiler

How did you get out?

You forgot to lock the door.

Oh? Ohhhh. Now, let's take it easy...

Relax, everything's fine. I'm actually feeling better now. Kinda hungry, but definitely better.

Spoiler

Sad thoughts about Champ have vanished. I mean, he was a good warg and a better men than both of you combined. But his death saved our lives, so he didn't die in vain.

Riiiight.

I'm dead serious. All I needed was a sound thrashing. Now I'm back on tracks again. Where is Kalin?

He's going to be busy for a few... couple of... seasons?

Spoiler

I HATE MY LIIIIIIIFE!

Later that night.

Still don't get it. Can't you do it here?

Look, I'm not even good at it, ok? I need silence and calm, healthy atmosphere to even make an attempt!

And so you want me to sleep in the same room with Grimwulf, so that you can move to Grimwulf's Safehouse?

The process will require some space, yes.

Spoiler

Let's talk it over again. Why do we need that research at all?

To figure out how to cut stones into construction blocks. Draw some schemes. Find the most effective ways and tools to do it.

Spoiler

If you're going to research anyway, why don't we start with something mandatory? Like brewing?

Because that WALL you want to build requires materials. We are almost out of wood; have a precious little steel that we need for a fuckton of other things; and most of materials from shipwreck cannot be salvaged, being too close to the centipedes. We are surrounded by mountains, and hundreds of raw stone chunks are just laying all around. If we could only cut them into blocks, we would be able to build walls, doors and furniture. I want to eat from a table like a SIR that I am - is it so much to ask?!

Don't turn into Grimwulf, Azira - I can barely withstand a single one. You know what we should do to make progress? Abort the whole relocation plan. This tunnel is beyond my ability. I'll break me spine before we get to the other end. If we had a miner among us, that's one thing. But right now? Let's just stay here, for the love of fuck.

You know how to speed up the process? Send Grimwulf to the other side. The two of you can dig the tunnel from both ends.

OR, we can just stay here. Look around you! Two houses, beds, research and butcher tables, stockpiles of stuff, raw venison, Grimwulf's shitty shashlik - who's going to haul all that? You? Your research maybe?

Look at you, people. That's exactly what I was talking about. Brewing is mandatory.

Kalin's Notes

We argued until midnight, eating some shitty shashlik from venison.

Then we all got tired. At least I did, after beating the crap out of Grimwulf; running to centipedes and back; digging through that cursed granite.

The moods are turning sour.

Meanwhile, only 13 days left until Winter. And we still haven't done shit to get ready for it.

 

[Dreaad]

DarkUnderlord

Can we add brofist betting to this LP? Like who will be the first casualty, how many days before the Kolony dies, will Grimwulf make a shashlik from kalins corpse etc

 

[laclongquan]

Looking back, breaking that wall is a disastrous first step.

 

[kazgar]

Looking back, breaking that wall is a disastrous glorious first step.

fixed!

 

[Azira]

No matter where we go, we need building materials for a wall. I like the natural chokepoint of the other location better, but why not fortify both places? I'm OK with staying here, if it's feasible. If we need to hew enough rock, that we'll have that tunnel built regardless, then I'd rather that we relocate, as the option I voted for needs a shorter wall.

After working on masonry tech, brewing sounds like a sound option. Alcohol should lift the spirits, right?