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Kodex Kommunistic Kolony in Rimworld, Seasons 2, 3

Storyfag

Perfidious Pole
Patron
Joined
Feb 17, 2011
Messages
17,803
Location
Stealth Orbital Nuke Control Centre
If you recruit an entire trading caravan (in this case the Elder Thing and its two minions), does the game acknowledge your command of all their wares?
 

Grimwulf

Arcane
Patron
Vatnik
Joined
Oct 1, 2014
Messages
4,045
Location
Kodex Kommunistic Kastle
If you recruit an entire trading caravan (in this case the Elder Thing and its two minions), does the game acknowledge your command of all their wares?

In this case - yes, we get everything. But that's not a caravan.

Caravan = lots of people, lots of goods, pack animals, cannot be recruited.
Visitors = few people, few goods, no pack animals, can be recruited.
 

Reinhardt

Arcane
Joined
Sep 4, 2015
Messages
32,096
giphy.gif
 
Unwanted

Kalin

Unwanted
Dumbfuck Zionist Agent
Joined
Sep 29, 2010
Messages
1,868,264
Location
Al Scandiya
Holy crap, that multiheaded mess Bliblablubb is almost as ugly as Ryan was!

Still, ya never know, dude could come in handy. I mean he looks like he could take quite a beating.

Keep ITZ raiders busy, wiggle around, soak up their blows and bullets, that sort of thing.
 

Bliblablubb

Arcane
Joined
Mar 1, 2014
Messages
2,925
Location
Copium Den
Holy crap, that multiheaded mess Bliblablubb is almost as ugly as Ryan was!
That's racist! Reported. I am beautifuuuuuuuuuuuuul in my own way. More than a one-eyed bad-cop at least.
:mhd:
5 tentacles! Just be thankful the crazy dude will take over Azira's anal candle duties instead.

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Also, apparently I am a tentacled womyn, romantic and not gay. Dis gun be gud. :hahano:





Mechanics question: Since I am incapable of manual labor, are all those non-combat skills wasted, or can I at least train an army of beserker deers? Also, as awsome as it would be to wield flaming arbalets in each lovetentacle, can I even wield ranged weapons at all?
 
Joined
Mar 16, 2016
Messages
450
Mechanics question: Since I am incapable of manual labor, are all those non-combat skills wasted, or can I at least train an army of beserker deers? Also, as awsome as it would be to wield flaming arbalets in each lovetentacle, can I even wield ranged weapons at all?

Only some types of work got disabled (hauling, cleaning, plant cutting ...). Pretty much any work based on non blank skill allowed. In this case - mining, cooking, training animals...

As for weapons:
Elder things have their weapons of choice - lazors.
 

Grimwulf

Arcane
Patron
Vatnik
Joined
Oct 1, 2014
Messages
4,045
Location
Kodex Kommunistic Kastle
Mechanics question: Since I am incapable of manual labor, are all those non-combat skills wasted, or can I at least train an army of beserker deers?

You can't do shit. :negative: I honestly don't know what to do with you. Maybe send you out on an expedition or sumth - we'll see how it goes.

Also, as awsome as it would be to wield flaming arbalets in each lovetentacle, can I even wield ranged weapons at all?

Elder Things get their own race-restricted weapons. I'll show them in the next update. You can't use human weapons, because... sigh. Look at me talking to an Eldrich abomination, trying to expalin why can't she use human weapons. Fuck my life.

The Elder Thing is fascinated by my anal candles?

She is fascinated by your sarcophagus, which is carved in shape of a candle. A little rough on the edges, just how you made them.
 

Eriador

Arbiter
Joined
Jan 18, 2014
Messages
423
You can't do shit. :negative: I honestly don't know what to do with you. Maybe send you out on an expedition or sumth - we'll see how it goes.

You should have her train some Shoggoths for the Codex army, of course. Expedition sounds like a good idea, maybe she'll find some!
 
Joined
Jul 11, 2010
Messages
3,213
Location
Vostroya
Oooh, the Forbidden Grimore!
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I hope that KKK won't summon Dagon, or Shub-Niggurath or whatever, seems kinda counter-productive to establishing a workers' paradise.
 

Grimwulf

Arcane
Patron
Vatnik
Joined
Oct 1, 2014
Messages
4,045
Location
Kodex Kommunistic Kastle
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*psshhhhhh*

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Hey, HEY! *bangs the radio* WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT SKIN-EATING PARASITES?!

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Grimwulf. This thing is doing it again!

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Get your tentacles away from my sarcophagus! Oh. Ohhhhh, fuck...

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What? Is it touching your or sumth?

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Not yet. The monster is unpacking for some reason. It carries KKK's junk weapons and something truly amazing.

Okay, so this lazor might seem a bit too much. It isn't compatible with combat extended mod, and thus doesn't require ammo of any sort. Not to mention it's deadly as fuck. Some might even say it's cheaty.

In my defense:
1. Cooldown time is significant - one lazor won't make a difference in a massive battle.
2. I couldn't force myself to exclude Elder Things mod from my mod list, just because of this lazor. It's a huge chunk of Lovecraftian content, men.
3. Combat Extended mod increases mortality to extreme levels. Any random bullet can easily insta-kill a colonist. You don't need a lazor for that.
4. We could restrain from using those altogether, but this is the only weapon usable by the Elder Things.
5. Last but not least, IT'S FUN!

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They love lasers~

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Okay, can we stop adressing this thing as "they"?

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I hereby declare Blibloblo a woman.

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Kommandante! They are a complex being!

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Ain't nothing complex about it. Five eyes, five mouths, two wings, and a veggie-like barrel to hold this shit together.

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Seriously, Grimwulf. You have to recruit her!

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MO-HOH?!

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Shut it, Greenball! Why on earth would I invite Bilbo Blob to my kommunistic paradise?

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For the sake of True Love~

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*psshh* Grimwulf. Raj just came here and consumed our last pill of vicodyn. Just sayin'. Over.

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That was my pill. Motherfucker.

DAY 7


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Wanna know how I lost muh eye?

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*gurgle*

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Deer hoof. Didn't see it comin'.

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*gurgle*

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So what do your people do when they lose an eye? I doubt you wear eyepatches on those tentacles of yours. Do you remove the whole tentacle? How does it work?

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*shrieks LOUDLY*

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Huuuuurrrrrrrrr, stop it!! Fuck! *goes outside*

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Makin' new friends, Kalin?

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Fuck this thing, Grimwulf. I'd rather go to work.

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Please, be polite to the Master.

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I didn't chop her shriekin' mouths - how am I not polite??

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*gurgles viciously*

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When will you LEAVE already?! I'm sick tired of seeing your sprawling appendages everywhere I go!

One hour later.


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I'm goin' to regret it so much...

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Mornin', Blobby.

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*pop pop*

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We do have something in common, after all. Both of us are bad at speeches.

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*makes a sound similiar to rattle*

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So here is the deal. You stay here in KKK to build kommunism. Even mind-contollin' veggies should be considered equals, I guess.

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*all five eyes are staring at Grimwulf*

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What?

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Damn, Grim! Can you be at least SOMEWHAT convincing??

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Say that you LOVE HER!

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Hrmpf. Ever tried vodka-flavored ice cream?

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Holy shit, it worked!

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Only because she never tried vodka! How could you play on her feelings like that?!

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That's how you recruit komrades, kiddos.

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Now. What the hell am I to do with you? You ain't gonna work for KKK, eh?

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*bubbling sound*

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*sigh* Well, shit. At least you have a lazor.

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Here is an idea. Why don't we make that laser work, Grimwulf?

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Hm? RIGHT!

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OKAY, veggie! You listen to me very carefully now. THE EVIL DEERS ARE GONNA EAT ALL YOUR ICE CREAM UNLESS YOU PWN THEM ALL AND BRING ME THE CORPSES!

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*SHRIEKING A WARCRY*

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At least we don't have to worry about supply of fresh meat from now on.

Later that morning.

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Whaddya think about this Grimoire, men?

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It's research material, and glorious KKK progresses on the shoulders and pain of others. In this case, Spigots.

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Research material? WE NEED TO RESEARCH TURRETS AND POWER GENERATORS!

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Kamasutra is the only occult reading this kolony needs.

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Hummmm, I say we get rid of it. Can't be good for the general mood.

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Fooled you again, stupid ghosts. Did you really think I care about your opinions?

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But seriously, this book is weird and creepy.

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Meanwhile.

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Wanna talk about that book?

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Nope.

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You wrote that shit in some kind of berserking state, and now you have nothing to say about it? What the fuck is wrong with you?!

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Drop this topic. We have corpses to haul.

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I'll turn your ancient body into a corpse, unless you START TALKIN' TO ME RITE NOW!!

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Look. I... *sigh* I don't remember.

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The book is... It is alive. I can hear it calling my name.

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I am surrounded by mad fucks and a fucking vegetable monster. GREAT!

Meanwhile.

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Please, Grimmy? Pretty please with a cherry on top and anal candle on the bottom?

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Fuck off.

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*crying in the most annoying way possible*

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Gggrrrr, ALRIGHT, DAMN YOU! FUCK!

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Tee-hee, tanks~

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Freakin' women!

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*grumbles* Such a waste of gud wood and steel on crap we don't even need...

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*a warlike gurgle*

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Keep it up, Blobra. Still a lot of deer to pwn. THERE! HAPPY NOW?!

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YES!~

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Try it, try it, try it!

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Damn you, woman! My looks are gud enough! Although... There.

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BLIBLOBLOB, wanna do some make-up? You are the only gurl in KKK! The only living one, at least.

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*sad popping*

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Poor thing doesn't have a face. Awwww.

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*psshhh* ATTENTION, KOMRADES! NEW RULE: ONLY STYLISH MEMBERS OF KKK ARE GETTIN' DAILY RATIONS! That is all.

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Later that day.

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*pssshhhhhhh* Huff puff, IS ANYBODY THERE?!

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*psshhh* Komissar Grimwulf speaking.

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WOW! Are you okay, Grim?

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Apparently not. *psshhh* BLOODRED SUNRAPER KOMMOGRIM WULFSSAR OF THE SOVIET CLAN will hear your plea.

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Oh, for fucks sake - can I speak to a SANE person?! PLEASE?!

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Heh heh, "sane person" in KKK. That is rich.

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Kommissar Grimwulf speaking again.

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FUCKING SAVAGES attacked my caravan for no reason! They are chasing me!

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Why should we help you?

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BECAUSE IT'S A NICE THING TO DO?!

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Eeeh

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Okay, I will work for you! I know my way around a kitchen.

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Still not convinced.

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Kitchens are hard environments and they form incredibly strong characters! COME ON!

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Awright, pull your beggin' butt over here. What's your name, chef?

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Gordon fuckin' Rams-- eerrr, call me ERYFKRAD.

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I will call you Chef. *psshhh* AWRIGHT, PEOPLE!! GET READY FOR INEVITABLE ARMY OF TRIBESMEN!

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*psshhh* FUCK'S SAKE, GRIMWULF! Look at us - fucking madmen with crossbows, we can't fight shit! In fact, I am the ONLY capable fighter around! HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO FIGHT AN ARMY?!

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No idea. We'll figure something out. ON YOUR POSITIONS, PRONTO!!

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Oh, boy.

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What this fucking vegetable doin' on my battlefield? And what's that in its tentacles?

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Focus your wandering eye on the enemy, Kalin. Blob can take care of herself.

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*GURGLE*

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What the fuck am I looking at exactly?

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Bliblablubb. Watch yourself - she has a nasty habit of enslaving people.

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Cut the chit-chat! HERE THEY COOOOME!!

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READY! AAAAAIM...

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*FIRES TEH LAZOR*

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FUCK!!!

To be continued...

sry men, it's too late and I'm too drunk - gotta sleep, will finish tomorrow
 
Joined
Mar 16, 2016
Messages
450
Lazors, there is nothing they can't do. Just don't go near line of fire - or naughty tentacle can move by itself...
Vanilla don't have bullet simulation - so anything which goes nearby line of fire have a chance to get bullet in the back (for teh drama purposes).
In CE weapons randomly fire in cone (calculated from shooting skill and weapon characteristics) - so as long as you properly guessed cone of fire - you can walk near it without problems.
 

Bliblablubb

Arcane
Joined
Mar 1, 2014
Messages
2,925
Location
Copium Den
Move aside Kalinski, there's a new sheriff in town!

And she's wielding a.... 40kg laser that requires 5 tentacles to operate and cuts a man in half.
...
...
...
FUCK YEAH! :cool:

I may just be a useless aubergine abomination, but there won't be any deer invasions on my watch.

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Hrmpf. Ever tried vodka-flavored ice cream?
:love:


Also technically I would be able to hear Grimwulf's head voices as well, right? Heh.
 
Joined
Sep 19, 2012
Messages
784
I might not check in for a while but consider me prepared to dive into all this spooky shit with much enthusiasm
 

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