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Let's Conquer the world as Glorious Lithuania

Cassidy

Arcane
Joined
Sep 9, 2007
Messages
7,922
Location
Vault City
0092.jpg


No homo, right?



A) With Perkunas to their side, they shall win. Don't give them any time to recover: it is now the time to deliver a crushing blow into the heart the Teutonic Knights and their oppression against the real Prussians.


B) They are the invaders, the agressors who tried to crush the mighty potato and force by sword and torture their religion into the people. No quarter!
 

Oesophagus

Arcane
Joined
Nov 19, 2010
Messages
2,330
Location
around
A) Either get in there fast or retreat alltogether
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEuuyVPmdhg

A) Not a peace treaty necessarilly, but a ceasefire. That is, however, highly unlikely, cause if you take Latvia they'll be pissed at you - So try to "distract" them for long enough.

Question regarding this LP: are you using any diplomacy-enhancing mods? If so, how do alliances work? Do they "mean" anything, or is the AI a complete backstabbing cock as always?

Also, potato talk makes this LP SO much better!
 

Gondolin

Arcane
Joined
Oct 6, 2007
Messages
5,827
Location
Purveyor of fine art
B

B

Potato for the potato god!

Also: Developers cannot into paganism. Is there any way you can replace your coat of arms with something that's not carrying a cross on his shield?
 

Infantryman

Scholar
Joined
Feb 9, 2010
Messages
459
Location
War Saw, Potatoland
A - Build a few rams and start the assault! The heathen crusaders must be slaughtered at once!

B - Be afraid! Königsberg shall burn to the ground!
 

Fens

Ford of the Llies
Joined
Nov 3, 2009
Messages
1,899
Location
pitcairn
B - they will come asking for potato but shall receive none

B - respect the emperor, expel the foreign barbarians
 
Joined
Nov 15, 2009
Messages
2,815
Location
Third Reich from the Sun
Heretics, Heretics everywhere!

0000.jpg

Welcome back to glorious Lithuania, after some careful deliberation it has been decided that a direct assault is the wisest course of action due the risk of an enemy force intervening to break the siege. Though before we can assault we need to build some siege equipment, and some heavy infantry is brought in this should greatly aid in the siege.

headhitman.jpg
Was no silly "deliberation", was my decision to attack.

And just who are you?

headhitman.jpg
Am head hit man, I leader of prestigious organization that run Lithuania

Head hitman? Well there certainly doesn't seem to be anything else of you.

headhitman.jpg
Not mock me heathen or I send hit men for you!
0002.jpg

Time passes as the preparations for the assault continues, and news of a mounted crossbow reaches lithuania, this could prove interesting.

headhitman.jpg
Just imagine hitman on horse with crossbow, could hit before they can count to potato

Sure sounds good, but doesn't look that we have any assassins what so ever in this country

headhitman.jpg
That because we all do important stuff and run country, no have time to kill, though train many new one soon to do the kill stuff

0003.jpg

The temple at Hrodna is further expanded, the expansion and construction of such holy sites is in full progress through all of Lithuania since uniting the people in one faith is of utmost importance for the wellbeing of the nation. Indeed in most of Lithuania Christians are in Majority and foreign missionaries are tirelessly working on spreading their heathen faith.

headhitman.jpg
I has solution for problem, send hit man to kill missionary

So where are they, I don't see any assassins?

headhitman.jpg
That because they so well hidden

We don't really have any assassins actually right?

headhitman.jpg
... well maybe not any ready for kill....

Hmm guess we will have to deal with those missionaries later, I don't get why we simply can not round up and kill them, but I guess that would make it to easy
0006.jpg

A few months later our forces are ready for the assault, various pieces of useful siege equipment has been constructed. Just in time as our spies have reported an enemy relief force heading for Riga, it may not be a huge army but combined with the defending army it could be troublesome. So this is our chance to capture Riga, looks like our preparations for the assault has paid off.

0007.jpg

As we move in and get closer look at the enemy forces it would seem they are a bit smaller than anticipated, mostly it is made up of depleted forces from the previously defeated army, however our army is made up mostly of ill equipped and poorly trained soldiers, making a direct assault a bloody business at best.
0009.jpg

our forces stand ready for the assault on riga!
0010.jpg

Some of our new reinforcements are seen here, a couple of companies of heavy infantry. If used correctly they should be able to break through the enemies defenses
0012.jpg

First some light infantry are sent in, the heavy infantry is kept in reserve to strike at a possible weak point in the defenses once the enemy has been tiered out from fighting our other soldiers
0013.jpg

headhitman.jpg
I has sent small force to sneak to back and open gate for horsemen

How the hell do you sneak on an open field in broad daylight?

headhitman.jpg
It is mystery skill of Lithuanian hitmen

0014.jpg

Our siege weapons are approaching the enemies gates and walls, so far all is well

0015.jpg

But then disaster strikes some how the enemy manages to set our ram ablaze! This means that our only way in will be on top of the walls, this could get bloody indeed.

0017.jpg

Our forces get our on top of the wall and engage the enemy, but against the bad odds even our brave Lithuanian soldiers may be struck by fear
0018.jpg

Though reinforcements are on their way, a little while after another siege tower hits the stretch of wall carrying some of the finest warriors of Lithuania, the inexperienced militia holding the wall offer little resistance and the tables are quickly turned.
0020.jpg

The walls are ours! Now we can open the gates and let the rest of our forces in
0021.jpg

One of the first companies sent into the city is assailed by some enemy knights, our poor untrained forces are cut down quickly against such veteran fighters and run in panic.
0022.jpg

Though we have something to counter those knights with, heavy spearmen. They are completely fresh and ready for battle, the enemy weary soldiers shall surely fall quickly.
0024.jpg

The enemies bodyguard is apprehended by spearmen and the charged in the flank by our heavy axemen these experienced soldiers with effective weapons to fight cavalry with quickly slaughter the enemies knights
0025.jpg

Indeed even their general fall, were is your god now?
0026.jpg

A final charge to take out the last defenders
0027.jpg

And victory is ours!
We lost a quarter of our forces, but mostly easily replaceable ones.
0029.jpg

Well looks like Latvia is now part of glorious Lithuania, the order has been struck a terrible blow indeed, but their heartlands are still in their full control. In order to finish the order once and for all we must take Prussia, but it is defended by the mighty Teutonic castle at Königsberg and defended by some of the finest warriors in the baltic, to take it we must first prepare well. Perhaps assassinating their leader would make matters easier.

headhitman.jpg
no is bad idea

And what would be a better plan

headhitman.jpg
I train good hit man to take out leader, will make them disordered and make attack easy

but that was my plan

headhitman.jpg
is mine, you just try to steal. you no good potato thief!

0030.jpg

Any way our first assassin Lithuanian hit man is under training now that we have captured a town with the correct establishments for such a project. The necessary building happens to be a brothel which is interesting

headhitman.jpg
Being hit man is hard work, need relax after job done

I suppose that makes sense.

0031.jpg

And here he is our first hit man, he is a bit on the... incompetent side. Though in the future we shall surely be able to train some better ones, once we get the hang of things.
0033.jpg

An envoy from Lithuania has reached a representative of Kiev, and manged to create a trade agreement for mutual profit, now that Lithuania has secured a baltic port city it is become much more important in the trading world. And we are even able to get maps of Kiev included in the deal.
0034.jpg

While the populace of Latvia are overall fairly happy with the new rule of Lithuania some are not, and a large army of catholics and Order supports have rallied together. They are many but leaderless and aimless, at worst they will plunder unprotected villages, they will have to be dealt with, but for now there are more pressing matters for the glorious Lithuanian army to attend to.
0035.jpg

Following the new victories and conquests a resurgence in the old faith is happening all over Lithuania, people are rallying under the banner of Lithuanian Duke in the name of the gods ready to defend their faith from all. Their zeal shall surely be put to use to further the glory of glorious Lithuania.
0036.jpg

but in the footsteps of the re surge of faith many heretic preachers have spring up as well. Heresy can not be tolerated so our hit men are tasked to silently take them out. However he fails his missions and is caught and brutally killed by heretic fanatics.
I wonder why our hitmen are so incompetent.

headhitman.jpg
he was Latvian, hitmen from Latvia no good as Lithuanian hit man

0037.jpg

But then as things are starting to go our way the treacherous Poles decide to attack us. No doubt are they scared by our growing power, and also would like to take piece of Lithuania while we are already fighting a war. Well let them come, the gods shall grant the faithful victory!

0039.jpg

Many are the heads of the hydra of heresy, this one was once a devout follower of the true faith. Something needs to be done.

0042.jpg

Our new hitman tries to take out one of the heretical preachers, but fails. he is at least some what more competent than his predecessor and manages to escape for another attempt at least.
0043.jpg

A small enemy raiding force is spotted, and an army is dispatched to deal with them.
0044.jpg

Diplomatic efforts to reach an understanding with the Poles fail, they are intent on destruction and conquest. very well their destruction and subjugation through conquest shall be their reward!

0045.jpg

A small but well equipped Polish force is spotted near hrodna, the towns garrison should be enough, but a few extra soldiers are recruited just in case.
0046.jpg

Once news of Polands declaration of war reaches the court at Novgorod they are quick to declare war on the Poles honoring our alliance. With our allies at our back victory shall surely be ours!
0047.jpg

Our new priests are much more devout than the old ones, these new ones who are at least relatively zealous shall aid greatly in rooting our heresy.
0048.jpg

Our hit man fails once again, why can't they take out one mad gibbering heretic?

headhitman.jpg
Is still only Latvian hit man
So that makes all the difference? really how large can the differenc be between a Lithuanian hit man and a Latvian one?

headhitman.jpg
Is huge
0050.jpg

The Teutonic force is attacked, they are few but well equipped. Also I sort of remembered this script function just now, should improve the battles some what.

0052.jpg

Our forces hide in the very sparse forest, only the general remaining visible the enemy should be eager to attack such a lone target. How we can hide in these few trees is beyond me.

headhitman.jpg
Is Lithuanian natural stealth skill

0054.jpg

the enemy advances, few but well armored
0055.jpg

As they get quite close a volley of arrows is fired, the enemies until now unaware are late to raise their shields i defense and many are struck down.
0057.jpg

It looks like the enemy commander and all cavalry are charging right at our archers, possibly unaware of the stakes planted in the ground, this could be a quick victory
0058.jpg

Though in the last moment the break of the charge and mill around confused as what to do, though one company of knights manages to quickly charge our cavalry archers and engange them in melee before they realize they should run
0059.jpg

An enemy troops trying to flank our main line is quickly stopped by a cavalry charge.
0060.jpg

The enemy infantry fights well, but are greatly out numbered, this can only have one outcome.
0061.jpg

our general him self and his men charge the enemy knights that attacked our cavalry archers, it's a quite devastating charge felling many of the enemies finest men.
0062.jpg

On the other flank our light cavalry has suffered a similar faith and a quickly overcome, but they stand their ground and fight bravely to the last man. :salute:

0066.jpg

Mean while the enemy main line had completely broken and they are all routing
0068.jpg

Though in the folling chase and confusion the enemies cavalry manages to charge our general and his bodyguard as they are chasing some routers oblivious to the world
0069.jpg

Our brave general and crown prince dies in the charge, a huge blow to the morale of our troops, though luckily the battle is just about won, so it shouldn't effect the outcome by any amount.
0073.jpg

Indeed the last enemy forces are confronted and the day is won
0074.jpg

A solid victory despite the loss of the crown prince, his conquest of Latvia, and his sacrifice today shall never be forgotten. :salute:
0076.jpg

A new heir to the throne is chosen, the previous heirs 14 year old son. He may not be ready to lead yet, however his Grand father the Duke is luckily in good health.
0078.jpg

Some small teutonic forces are sighted by our spies. Enemies at every front however we can only deal with one of them properly at a time. So shall we

. A. Aim to destroy the Teutonic Order once and for all.

or shall we

[/b] B. Focus in the treacherous Poles, their lands are not as well fortified, but neither are they nearly as wealthy as Prussia[/b]
 

JarlFrank

I like Thief THIS much
Patron
Joined
Jan 4, 2007
Messages
33,052
Location
KA.DINGIR.RA.KI
Steve gets a Kidney but I don't even get a tag.
Kill the knights first to wipe out one threat once and for all, before attempting to make mashed potatoes.
 
Joined
Nov 15, 2009
Messages
2,815
Location
Third Reich from the Sun
The battle of Königsberg


0000.jpg


We continue the story of glorious Lithuania were we left of last time.
0001.jpg

Our hitman tries to take one of the vile heretic scum, but fares just as well as the last one.

headhitman.jpg
We need Lithuanian hitman I tell you, is big difference!

0002.jpg

The Lithuanian hitman may be better but the priests sure ain't, one of hthem even succumbs to heresey him self!
0003.jpg

And so does another one, these heretical scum can not be tolerated!
0004.jpg

There thats better, death to the heretics!
0005.jpg

The current plan is to Finish of the already weakened order, however first the Polish force threatening Hrodna must be dealt with.
0006.jpg

What is this? Everyone seems to want a piece of glorious Lithuania, now the Danes as well decide to declare war on us, we really should send a hit man there...
0007.jpg

Though there is some good news as another heretical priest has been revealed as the heretic he is, and subsequently burned, suffer not the heretic!
0008.jpg

A new hit man is trained, he looks considerably more promising than the last ones.

headhitman.jpg
Is Lithuanian, has it in blood
0009.jpg

Well at least he doesn't get caught even if he fails his missions, so he may yet have some potential
0010.jpg

The town of Hrodna has grown greatly the last years and is now large and prosperous (not in that way) and we may consider building some mighty stone walls to better protect it. However the war taxes our treasury greatly and we do not have the funds for it currently.
0011.jpg

One of our commanders is ambushed by brigands and highwaymen on his way back from his mission of establishing watchtowers. He is greatly outnumbers but with the greater quality of his men victory is not only possible but highly probable
0012.jpg

Our force is small but skilled and well equipped, unless they get in lucky hits the enemies arrows shouldn't be able to harm them.
0013.jpg

Charge!
0014.jpg

Just a few meters from the enemy line, only two men fell from the enemy arrows. And with the high momentum of galloping horse, man and armor we should trample them beneath us!
0015.jpg

The charge is utterly devastating, about half the enemy force is taken out in one blow.
0017.jpg

The bandits are not very skilled in close combat, used to only confront defenseless peasants with their bows. The bandit leader is quickly cut down, seeing this the remaining men run for their lives. Victory is ours!
0019.jpg

Superiority through quality, though usually when Lithuania is facing her foes the situation is the opposite.
0022.jpg

novgorod one again honors the alliance and declares war on Denmark, but sign a truce with Poland, presumably because they have no direct land border. Well no matter as long as they keep the Danes in Estonia of our backs we should be able to deal with the Teutons and Polacks.
0024.jpg

This time however our hit man succeeds in his mission
headhitman.jpg
See no problem for skilled Lithuanian hit man

0025.jpg

Alright he can handle a simple heretic, but how about an enemy general?
headhitman.jpg
Is no problem, Lithuanian hit man kill any one, could kill Jesus man if was not dead already

So they could kill Jesus if they hadn't already been captured and killed, because they can't even assassinate a rambling mad man?

headhitman.jpg
Is not what I mean, not mock me!

0026.jpg

Another success in battling heresy is rep ported, the last of the heretical priests have been executed. Though Latvia is still rife with heresy.
0027.jpg

As the grand Lithuanian army approaches the enemy captain bringing reinforcements turned his tail and bravely fled, leaving the Polish general in a dire situation, where he is greatly outnumbered

0028.jpg

The Polish army is very well equipped though and it will not be an easy victory.
0030.jpg

We set up stakes in the woods and prepare and ambush, with some luck the enemy cavalry will not realize the presence of the stakes until it is to late, impaling their mounts.
0031.jpg

The polack force approaches
0032.jpg

Thanks to superior Lithuanian stealth skills we hide in the woods among the non existent grass and bushes, one day I have to find out how that works
headhitman.jpg
I tell you, but I have kill you then

No thanks
0034.jpg

Cavalry archers move out of their hiding place and starts firring on an unsuspecting foe.

0035.jpg

It is surprisingly effective considering their armor, but we strike form behind negating the advantage of their shields
0036.jpg

The enemy being quite close the archers open up a surprise volley that is relatively effective
0038.jpg

The enemy knights become quite annoyed by the cavalry archers. Really when the knights are aware of the threat the cavalry archers thhe archers are no more of a threat than a bee is to a bear. However the the bee may enrage the bear and lure it away from our forces.
0040.jpg

Some of our heavier cavalry manages to get charged by Polish knights however to devastating effect.
0041.jpg

Some enemy heavy swordsmen engage our ill equipped troops in close combat it would be a slaughter, however one of our skirmisher companies unleash a surprise volley of javelins. So many fall so quickly that their morale and organization is completely ruined and they rout.
0044.jpg

meanwhile the enemy general recklessly charges into the woods and gets caught in yet another ambush, his body guards are quickly slaughtered
0045.jpg

Indeed he him self goes down quickly, however he is not killed, merely wounded and captured. His ransom should be a nice sum, perhaps it could be used to fund the construction of walls for the city he was so eager to assault.
0047.jpg

Upon their general being captured the rest of the enemy either routs or surrenders, victory is ours!
0048.jpg

An envoy is sent to the Polish court offering the ransom of the captured knights and nobles. However the Polish Kings responds by sending the envoys head back on a pike. Such an insult can not be tolerated, and the heads of the Polish nobles are sent to the Polish King in turn.
0050.jpg

This worsens our relations with Poland, and the Pope as well. Should our relations with the papacy grow to bad we may find our selves the victims of a crusade soon enough. We shall be ready!

headhitman.jpg
Or I send hitman, kill pope

They can't even kill a lone heretic priest in the woods, how can they kill one of the best guarded men in the world?

headhitman.jpg
Trust me, has ace up sleeve
0051.jpg

Some mercenaries are hired to aid in the assault on Königsberg. Their loyalty is questionable being Prussian, but as long as we use them correctly it should not be an issue. Also as you can see mercenaries are much more expensive than in vanilla, a nice touch if you ask me, also these are some quite excellent spear men. The attack value of a basic levy spearmen is 2 for comparision.
0054.jpg

Our latest Lithuanian hit man performs another successful mission this time Killing a high level Order commander. I'm starting to think that they might be useful after all.

headhitman.jpg
See once we have Lithuanian hit men they much better than poor Latvian ones.

Yeah I'm sure thats all the difference.

headhitman.jpg
It is.

0055.jpg

This hitman is proving to be quite capable.
0056.jpg

As the glorious Lithuanian army stops for the day a temporary fort is established. being caught with out defenses against the plentiful Order heavy cavalry would be devastating.
0057.jpg

New reaches Lithuania of a Islamic Jihad on Jerusalem, excellent if the Christians and muslims are fighting each other this should be all the easier for us.
0058.jpg

Our hitman moves in to for an assassination attempt of the favored successor of the grand master.
0059.jpg

However it fails miserably, well I suppose that was a difficult mission even for a Lithuanian hit man.
0060.jpg

The Order army is split in two one small one patrolling the country side
0061.jpg

And a large elite force defending Köngsberg (fun fact, Königsberg didn't even exist at the current date) castle.
440px-Knigsberg_Castle.jpg

here is a picture of it (not so fun fact, this doesn't even exist today.)
0062.jpg

An attempt is made to assault the small force at night to prevent the larger forge intervening, however the grandmaster is sly as fox and has possibly foreseen this turn of events and is ready for battle. This could end poorly for Lithuania to say the least, where is our hitman to take out this nuisance?

headhitman.jpg
Is training new one, old one killed in impossible mission

I though they could kill any one?

headhitman.jpg
yes is can kill all... except not all
0063.jpg

The battle begins
0065.jpg

The small enemy force is straight ahead.
0064.jpg

However the enemy is brining in large reinforcements.
0065.jpg

Some spear men are deployed to cover from attack hitting ass and flank.
0067.jpg

For such a clever commander the grand master is reckless to say the least and charges ahead of his main force into our lines. Brave but meaningless
0068.jpg

Some heavy axemen charge in from the flank, not all hitmen operate in the dark.
0070.jpg

The smaller enemy force advances, and most of the enemy cavalry is deployed directly at our rear, many soldiers have been redeployed to prevent distasteful rape of our army.
0071.jpg

Mean while the Lithuanian axe hitmen have managed kill the Order grandmaster, such a blow to enemy morale way turn the battle to our favour, for as it is now we are both out numbered and the enemy troops are of superior quality.
0073.jpg

Indeed even the enemy knights are shaken by the fall of their leader, imagine the fear that the lesser men must feel!
0074.jpg

nearly all our forces have been moved to fight the larger army only a few remain to engage the smaller force should it charge, it would seem it is kept in reserve. Luckily through holding our position in the beginning we have the stakes to cover our flank from the inevitable cavalry charge.
0075.jpg

Several enemy companies rout after the fall of the grandmaster, though the battle is still in the enemies favor
0078.jpg

Finally the enemy reserve charges, why has he held back so long? Well no matter it has only benefited us
0079.jpg

The main force is nearly completely broken and is retreating, though some of our forces are routing as well.
0080.jpg

The other Order commander repeats the mistake of the ex grandmaster, these knights pursuit for glory and honor shall be their undoing.
0083.jpg

He actually manges to singlehandedly (with his body guard of course) to break one of our companies. Though not with out losses
0084.jpg

After his forces sustained huge casualties he retreats him self, though we send some light cavalry that was previously chasing routers to intercept him long enough for our heavy cavalry to reach him and finish him.

0086.jpg

Thats is the final nail in the coffin and the battle is won, a glorious victory indeed. One wonders what the outcome would have been should the Grandmaster not have foolishly thrown his life away, but it is best not to dwell on such thoughts.
0088.jpg

The remaining defense of Königsberg is just a few of the cowards that abandoned their brothers in the previous battle, victory is simply a formality at this point.
0089.jpg

Though we still need some siege equipment to take the city.
0090.jpg

Hmm interesting, a new way to produce armor has spread to Lithuania, this shall surely be off use.
0092.jpg

I have a quick look at our victory conditions, interesting enough capturing Rome it self is one of them, perhaps once day the Drank Duke shall parade through the streets of the ancient city it self! Though at that point the title of Duke would hardly be fitting.
0093.jpg

The vile Danes and Poles have formed an alliance, not that it changes anything they were both our foes already.
0095.jpg

A small Polish force is spotted near Hrodna even with some Knights in their ranks they should be little more than a nuisance.
0096.jpg

Finally the army is ready for the the assault on Königsberg
0097.jpg

I decided to auto calc this battle considering how small the enemy force was the battle would pretty much consist of marching from point A to point B to claim victory.
0098.jpg

Ah glorious, Prussia is added to the lands of the glorious Lithuania. The city is very modern and has many skilled craftsmen they shall come of great use producing arms and armor for the nobles of Lithuania. While all affiliates of the Order are expelled the local Lords as allowed to keep their land as long as they swear fealty to the Grand Duke. The Order is not eliminated, but it has lost all of it's possessions, thus rendering it next to useless, and offers no threat.
0099.jpg

The castle it self took some damage in the fighting and repairs are ordered, also the construction of a shrine to the gods.
it should be noted that unlike other factions Lithuania has a choice of holy sites dedicated to different gods giving different bonuses similar to Rome Total war.
0100.jpg

A monument is also contrcuted at the site of the great victory over the Order, glorious indeed! However we are still at war, and we are at war at two fronts, which one shall we deal with first?

Either

A) Take the Danish Lands in Estonia, they are separated from the Danish mainland and should be an easy target.

or

B) All out assault on Poland, there can only be one potato nation!
 

Oesophagus

Arcane
Joined
Nov 19, 2010
Messages
2,330
Location
around
A) and B) - Estonia should be easy to take, and Polato seems to haven no large forces, considering what they've thrown at you so far
 

Serious_Business

Best Poster on the Codex
Joined
Aug 21, 2007
Messages
3,909
Location
Frown Town
TW = more like total derp. Or total turd. I don't know fuck being clever, this shit is too easy. Like hell you're going to loose even one battle. Do you have some kind of AI mod installed? I hear they actually can mod the AI in M2, although I never tried it. Wouldn't make much sense playing without such a mod, otherwise it's just map painting with tedious repetitive micromanagement of battles. Even then, not sure it'd fix it, but I'm curious if it'd at least make your losses more credible and not 5% every time.

But I like broken english, is good, is very potato indeed
dwarfminer01.png
 
Joined
Nov 15, 2009
Messages
2,815
Location
Third Reich from the Sun
Yeah I'm running a custom AI script, it's at least some what non retarded such as protecting against flanking attacks and such. Still I've been meaning to try a nice little tool that randomly picks an AI script before each battle, thus making it much more unpredictable.
Still the main problem for the AI so far has been rushing in their general and getting him killed, the battle against the main Teutonic army for example I probably wouldn't have won if the grand Master didn't rush straight in and get killed. Unfortunately it is not possible to fix that issue according to AI modders. Though I wonder how the Ai woould use the general if it's classification was changed from "heavy cavalry" to say "heavy infantry", it would probably hold it back much longer making it more difficult.

Otherwise yeah there is no real way to lose unless you are fighting on every single front, but still I wouldn't count it out, Novgorod will back stab me sooner of later, being heathen and having poor relations with the pope should make him call a crusade soon probably, and Kiev is neutral so I don't think a war with them is to far away.

Also on Rome being part of the victory conditions should we have it as a goal to take Rome, or simply not bother?
 
Joined
Nov 15, 2009
Messages
2,815
Location
Third Reich from the Sun
Pop a Pole

In today's update we pop some moles, sorry Poles.

0000.jpg

So Novgorod and The Cumans have started a little border dispute it would seem, hopefully they should still be able to tie down the Danes in Estonia and cover our back while we deal with the Potatolanders.
0001.jpg

Looks like the small Polish force is heading for Mensk, no matter a relief force from Vilnius should be able to handle it while the main force heads into Poland.
0002.jpg

Spies report the fortress of Thorn to be lightly guarded, perhaps and excellent opportunity to capture the enemies most important military facilities and recruiting grounds.
0003.jpg

The Poles blockade the Port of Königsberg, it is a very small force but as we completely lack a navy we are unable to do anything about it. The need for a strong navy is becoming clearer as the coast line of the previously land locked nation continues to grow.
0004.jpg

A couple of ships are commissioned in Riga, they are rather poor quality ships but they should be enough since the Polish navy isn't much more than a handful of old rotted semi wrecks.
0005.jpg

Interesting, very interesting.
headhitman.jpg
Just think of possibility, could hit target from very far away
yes but the sound should draw attention no?
headhitman.jpg
Yes but bigger cannon shot longer yes? build really big cannon and fire target. Maybe make so big they not realize is cannon... and then...is dead
Brilliant I'm sure it will work
0006.jpg

meanwhile the remnants of the Teuton navy bloackades Riga, they have no land yet they linger. Actually this is a bug since they don't have a "family tree" they can't be destroyed, it's a bit odd but the only faction that was intended to not have one was the papal states who are supposed to be indestructible, thus the feature of not having a family tree was coded to make the faction in question indestructible. I could fix this by a quick edit to a file giving them a family tree, would eliminate them so we an finally get rid of them, it wont make any difference to the game since they can't revolt.
0007.jpg

Lithuania's first naval battle is a success. One day we shall rule the waves as well as the land.
0008.jpg

Königsberg could be upgraded to a "fortress", greatly increasing it's defenses and allowing to recruit more/new troops, though it's quite expensive.
0009.jpg

Hrodna now has some stone walls, making it considerably harder to assault than previously.
0013.jpg

Our new hitman goes for a really easy target for some "practice" and fails. I wonder when we get some better hitman.
headhitman.jpg
Is because no has cannon, must move with time. Cannon is latest tool for hit man, dagger is so 1244.
0014.jpg

Glorious Lithuanian navy blockades a Polish port... not that probably does any difference since the Ai cheats so much with money any way...
0014.jpg

Seems the Danes has a very strong army at Estonia, the Novgorodian army isn't strong enough to take it, but they keep them in there and off our backs. Excellent this means we will be able to take it once we've dealt with Potato land.
0015.jpg

A small Polish force approaches Königsberg, why all the small piecemeal forces and no large doom stack? I don't get it.
0016.jpg

What do you mean Poland has Lithuanian archers?! Traitors! I'd order my hit men to take them out if they weren't so incompetent.
0017.jpg

The Polish general in a flash of brilliance decides to charge straight into our spearmen, good thinking indeed. That or they said something about his mother...
0018.jpg

He quickly gets out flanked and surrounded
0019.jpg

And captured as he tries to run away
0020.jpg

Yeah that pretty much break the enemy army, why must the enemy general always be so retarded? Why?!
0022.jpg

Well it does seem that the Poles does have some more to come with several large armies appear out of nowhere the following turn.
0023.jpg

First up to deal with captain coleslaw
0024.jpg

his forces seem decent enough
0025.jpg

Hmm fog this might actually prove challenging!
0026.jpg

Actually it clears up and it's back to the normal easy way (supposedly the battle difficulty is "very hard").
0029.jpg

Something or another is happening here... probably their knights chasing our light cavalry to no avail.
0030.jpg

Alright so the close combat part has begun let's see what happens now.
0031.jpg

... they start routing... the fucking fuck? They have a huge moral bonus for the high "difficulty" level and their leader is still alive.
0032.jpg

Creative Assembly, am disappoint
0033.jpg

Alright let's pop the next stack of Poles popping up every where.
0034.jpg

What is this obviously chrsitian structure doing in pagan prussia? memo to self, destroy all heathen temples.
0035.jpg

Once more we use our awesome Lithuanian hitman skills to hide in plain sight in broad daylight
0036.jpg

Well this is going well, we've got ranged superiority, and they have lightly armored troops so I guess it makes sense that so many dies.
0037.jpg

Oh hey look what that? Is it a bird? is it a Potato? No it is a Polish general charging straight into our sharpened stakes!
0038.jpg

Guess what happens, this isn't "Artificial Intelligence" this is fucking Artificial Stupidity.
Such idiotic tactics can not be described in words only this is enough
facepalm.jpg

0039.jpg

As predicted they go all running over the place now.
0040.jpg

A victory most surprising.
headhitman.jpg
You only win because hit men
What do you mean that retarded general rode straight into a sharpened stake and got impaled
headhitman.jpg
Was no sharpened stake, was Lithuanian hitman disguised as sharpened stake
0041.jpg

We've got one more Pole to pop, this one looks fairly large and well equipped at least, might pose a challenge to the mighty Lithuanian army?
0043.jpg

Mean while a couple of Polish army seems to be a having a pick nick south of Mensk and are in no hurry, well at least they killed of the rebels in the area for me. No matter what you say about a Pole but they are always so courteous as to help you even when at war with them :salute:
0044.jpg

Riga has also grown quite large, however there is no money to expand the walls for now, all the funds of glorious Lithuania is spent in it's army'
headhitman.jpg
See this why hit men so bad, need more funding. if we had more could make really really small cannon.
And whats that good for?
headhitman.jpg
Could hide in clothes and use when they no expect, and if they wonder what is that long thing in pants, just say is happy to see you
0046.jpg

The next turn... they just don't stop coming...
0047.jpg

We fight the large group next to Hrodna, oh we get reinforcements from the city garrison that we absolutely need to win!
0049.jpg

First thing that happens is that the Poletato general charges our line, guss what happens next?
0050.jpg

If you guessed that their general died you where wrong, one of their cavalry units charge our archers and utterly destroy them and they flee head over heel
0051.jpg

No the second thing to happens is that their general dies no the next thing, the effect is just about the same though. At the rate we're killing of Polish general you would think natural selection would kick in soon and we would face some intelligent ones.
0054.jpg

And thats pretty much it...
0055.jpg

At least the poles manages to scrounge up enough potatoes to pay the ransom this time!
0056.jpg

more armies wonderful, we will be poping poles to the end of our days!
0057.jpg

mean while in a different part of the world the other crusading state (besides the Teutonic Knights) has taken a great blow from an Islamic Jihad.
0058.jpg

Indeed that was the last of them, they usually get destroyed pretty early, overall one of the hardest factions to play.
0059.jpg

Potatoes inc! Take cover
0062.jpg

The Poles sneak up cleverly and blockade our port once again, though that if swiftly amended.
0064.jpg

Another Polish force is attacked next to hrodna, it should be easy but...
0067.jpg

... it's a fucking bridge battle. One wonderful battle of attrition coming up!
0069.jpg

Well utilize that artificial stupidity should they decide to charge
0070.jpg

Actually this one is not suicidal and decides to sit back and relax on the other river bank
:thumbsup:
0071.jpg

This is like that thing that happens after football games, a big brawl.
0073.jpg

The enemy archer opens fire into the melee mostly hitting their own men in the back... also we quickly with drae the spear men from the bridge since their exhausted by now and let some axemen charge in, they should be enough to break the weary enemy on the bridge.
0074.jpg

yeah, with some luck we won't be stuck fighting on the bridge like this until the battle timer ends.
0076.jpg

Well we make it to the other end and manage to spread out a bit that should make things to faster at least
0077.jpg

Cavalry is through :salute:
0078.jpg

Take that traitorous archers!
0080.jpg

After a while the Poles realize that our cavalry beating up their archers is not a good thing and decide to charge our cavalry
0081.jpg

We retreat back to our own lines and they follow, you can see their commander there in the bloody white and red
0082.jpg

Good bye Polish commander, at leat you were somewhat smarter than your predecessor
0083.jpg

Mean while enemy reinforcements arrive and their general charge as well, very intelligent.
0084.jpg

Except well he dies... think thats him on the ground there
0085.jpg

Both commanders dead and the enemy routs
0088.jpg

Somewhat bloodier but that thanks only to the bridge
0089.jpg

This time they also have enough potatoes for the ransom
0090.jpg

Damn it now we have to fight them again
0091.jpg

Our new assassin actually manages to kill his target!
0092.jpg

He is still completely shit though well with some more practice perhaps...


Any way so what will our over all strategy be

A. Continue to fight the Poles head on hopping to wear them out in a war of attrition, they will eventually run out of at least the high level troops such as knights (about 1 companey per castle per 10 turns)

or

B. make a gamble and send a decent sized force to capture some Polish territory ignoring their main forces.
 

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