Let's heckin' play CUCKOLD SIMULATOR: Life as a Beta Male Cuck!!!

[Jenkem]

Here is the main menu screen. Here we see the happy family posing for us. It's so heckin' cool XD!!
Anyways. let's hit new game and begin our life as a beta male!

My Car. Yes that is my very own personalized license plate. And yes, I'm keeping that bumper sticker on forever just to piss off you damned drumpfies LOL!

FLAG'S UP! That means we have mail!!! I wonder what it could be, I don't remember ordering any funky pops...

OMG YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS MY HECKIN' MASK FINALLY ARRIVED! LET'S TRY IT ON!

SO MUCH BETTER! Hahaha remember to wear your maskerinos, dooders!! It's cool how something so simple can save so many lives... I FUCKING LOVE SCIENCE!! XD Anyways, enough of waffling around outside, I'm eager to see my family.... I can't wait to see their smiling faces. I do it all for them!!

My beautiful baby boy!!!! Tyrone Jr is a handful but he's just so precious... Look at him greeting his papa at the door after a long day at work. What a heckin' trooper! He is going to grow up to be a scientist, I just know it!!!!

I really shouldn't be wasting so much time before I check in with my wife, but I'm just so heckin' worn out from work. Perhaps I should drink something to boost my energy before I go and make love to her...

Yep! My fridge is ALWAYS full of soy-based meal substitutes! This will surely give me the energy and stamina I need to make sweet love to my beautiful wife! I bet you chuds are jealous, huh?


to be continued....

 

[Falksi]

I was playing a similar game last night......

Spoiler

Cockhold Simulator.

Spoiler

With ur mom

Spoiler

....and boy does she have a big cock

 

[Jenkem]

The soy-based meal replacement drink really hit the spot! I decided to saunter up to the master bedroom and get ready for some hot lovin' but my beautiful wife and her bull were already going at it! That's not how it's supposed to be, what the heck??? I can't even right now!!!!

I was mortified... how could this happen to me? My wife started to tell me to get out of our bedroom and I don't know what I said but I *REALLY* angered Tyrone and he suddenly got angry and started yelling at me too!! This is my house!!!

Tyrone explained how I was not being very receptive to my wife's needs and I agreed. He was VERY upset with me and demanded I give him all my money.. I felt bad about barging in on them and didn't want to have any problems so I gave it to him without hesitation.

UGH WHY DID I ACT SO STUPID? MY WIFE AND TYRONE ARE REALLY REALLY MAD AT ME NOW AND I'M FEELING STRESSED..... I need to relax or something, but wait... look at the time! DeShawn should be getting home from school right now... I should probably go and make sure he is home safe before I do anything fun....

Ahh, there he is.. my big baby boy... He can be kind of mean at times but I love him all the same! He's just at that rebellious stage all kids go through. He'll probably be a doctor or a lawyer when he grows up.. He's very smart, just like his daddy! I asked him how school was but he didn't seem interested in that... hahah kids will be kids am I right? XD

hahahaha DeShawn cracks me up... maybe he'll be a standup comedian some day! He could be the new Patton Oswalt or something! hahahaahah that would be cool... Well.. time to get him home and safe, the outside world can be a scary place!

haha, there's that wit I was talking about! Guess I'll just turn on the TV for him, I don't want to get him mad.. I'm already in enough trouble as is! I just wanna leave this day behind me and do something relaxing, because I deserve it!

Fiind out next time...

 

[Maxie]

why this thread dont have crispy tag
coward

 

[Thor Kaufman]

 

[RangerBoo]

The day in the life of an average Reddit and Twitter user.

 

[Thor Kaufman]

My friends say this game is based. Like... based? Based on what?

The sign is a subtle joke. The shop is called "Sneed's Feed & Seed", where feed and seed both end in the sound "-eed", thus rhyming with the name of the owner, Sneed. The sign says that the shop was "Formerly Chuck's", implying that the two words beginning with "F" and "S" would have ended with "-uck", rhyming with "Chuck". So, when Chuck owned the shop, it would have been called "Chuck's Feeduck and Seeduck".

one of my all time faves xD

 

[Mustawd]

rip jenkem.

 

[supervoid]

This game is an accurate description of the traditional american nuclear family.

 

[lightbane]

This looks really depressing.

 

[RangerBoo]

This looks really depressing.

Just like an average Reddit or Twitter users life.

 

[Kalin]

Best LP in years keep it up bro!

 

[RangerBoo]

Best reviews on Steam:

Interesting simulator of a game journo's day to day

First time I saw Reddit in this game......half of the Twitter and Reddit users are going to try and cancel the game because it's too realistic for them....too close to home. Two thumbs up

The only thing I noticed missing was the ability to Mail-in your Joe Biden ballot. Otherwise it's basically a modern day Democrat-voter Simulation.
9.5/10.

I now finally understand what it's like to be sapped of my testosterone, be a Reddit moderator and an embarrassment to God all at the same time! thank you Team SNEED!

You will eat the bug.
You will drink the soy.
You will live in the pod.
You will get the vax.
You will own nothing,
And you will be happy.

 

[Jenkem]

I ran up to my room excitedly, finally I had some free time and there were some special friends I desperately needed to see.. It had been a hard day and these little fellers always bring me relief! They are just so heckin' cute and remind me of my favorite heroes!

My little funkarinos. My poppy boys....

Hahahah... Jealous??? Yeah, not everyone can have as great a collection of Funky Pops as I do... just another thing that sets me apart from those losers on the internet. Oh, haha! That reminds me that I blasted some stupid trumpanzees the other day.. haha I wonder if my post got upvoted XD let me check!!

Oh hahah.. I'm not logged in. DeShawn must have been using my computer without my permission again! That rascal, haha... My wife keeps all my computer passwords to protect me from identity theft. She's so smart, I never would have thought of that. Caring, too. That's why I married her! Anyways, I read the front page of reddit and OMG a heckin' Call of Duty event? You can be Rambo or John McClane??? OMG I HAVE THOSE FUNKY POPS!!!! hahahaahah it's a small world I guess hahaha!! I'm getting bored with reddit so decide to check up on the latest in RPG news...

As much as I enjoy my time surfing the web and reading lots of interesting things, I keep hearing my wife moan from across the hallway and it's very distracting! I think it's time to leave.

stay tuned for more

 

[RangerBoo]

Okay, that RPG Codex one has to be photoshopped as your average Reddit or Twitter user would have a stroke after seeing the shit we all like to post on here.

 

[Corvinus]

Awesome LP, Jenkem. That cuck sure knows how to treat a lady! Does the game come with an exit bag?

 

[Wild Slop]

Tyrone may have worked up quite the sweat. He'll likely be in need of refreshment. You should buy him some grape drank. Stop thinking of time off for YOURSELF, worry over getting YOURSELF in trouble.
NOT OK. DO BETTER. Get the man a drink.


$0 though...


...

DO BETTER.

 

[Jenkem]

every screenshot in this thread is direct from the game, no photoshopping or editing.

 

[Wild Slop]

The thought did cross my mind and I dread to say it but.... I know how we can earn the money for Tyrone's grade drank.

Spoiler

Sell a Funky Pop doll!

 

[Ventidius]

Quality entertainment, looking forward to the rest of it.

 

[King Crispy]

This was your chance to insert me as your character's hero portraying me as the ultimate cuck role model but as usual YOU BLEW IT.

 

[Ismaul]

This was your chance to insert me as your character's hero portraying me as the ultimate cuck role model but as usual YOU BLEW IT.

You wish you were a great cuck like this main character.

Instead of Funky Pops all you have is an RTX 3090. You're still thinking about your e-peen when being a cuckold would land you a woman.

You were right Crispy, this thread shouldn't have the Crispy tag, it is too good for it.

 

[True Ukrainian]

Is the codex really featured in the game? LOL

 

[Kalin]

Come on bro don't let it end like this update for the update god I need my fixerinoo

 

[baud]

Is the codex really featured in the game? LOL

I guess it's just an in-game web browser, so Jenkem just entered the address of the codex