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Vapourware Let's play Door Kickers -- top-down tacticool SWAT team sim -- Extreme Police Brutality Edition

Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
zJMhDUX.png


Today we embark on an LP of Door Kickers, a game that allows you to command a team of highly trained SWAT police officers and join the fight against terrorists, drug cartels, and anyone else who infringes upon globohomo the rights and freedoms of everyday, hard-working citizens all across the free world.

The game features battles waged in gripping, pulse-pounding, real-time with pause action with extensive mission planning and realistic squad-based tactics. It's reminiscent of the early Rainbow Six games -- complete with route planning, waypoints, go-codes, room clearing, and many fun toys to play with -- albeit presented from a top-down perspective.

Josef Svejk a.k.a. "Parsimonious cook"
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Status: Active
Missions: 3
Enemies Killed: 3
Times Wounded: 0


Claude Auchinleck a.k.a. "The Auk"
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Status: Injured
Missions: 3
Enemies Killed: 7
Times Wounded: 2


Joe a.k.a. "boot"
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Status: Active
Missions: 3
Enemies Killed: 6
Times Wounded: 0


Isaac Adelschmidt a.k.a. "Ghulgothas"
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Status: Active
Missions: 3
Enemies Killed: 4
Times Wounded: 0


Gromislaw Czempinski a.k.a. "Grom"
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Status: Injured
Missions: 3
Enemies Killed: 2
Times Wounded: 1


Judy Hopps a.k.a. "ValeVelKal"
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Status: Active
Missions: 2
Enemies Killed: 1
Times Wounded: 1


Astolfo Gitler a.k.a. "Kikeschreck"
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Status: Active
Missions: 3
Enemies Killed: 2
Times Wounded: 0


Forge Gloyd a.k.a. "Rogue"
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Status: Active
Missions: 2
Enemies Killed: 5
Times Wounded: 1


Josselin Beaumont a.k.a. "Professional"
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Status: Active
Missions: 2
Enemies Killed: 0
Times Wounded: 0


Calvin Ryan a.k.a. "White Knight"
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Status: Active
Missions: 2
Enemies Killed: 7
Times Wounded: 0
We need strong, honorable men people troopers to fill out the team's ranks, and I can think of no better place than the Codex from which to recruit. Luckily the game makes it fairly easy to customize our squad, so there's good opportunity for audience participation and (hopefully) an entertaining LP.
 
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Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
All right lads, so here's the info needed in order to sign up.

Name

Callsign
This will be your Codex screenname unless otherwise specified.

Gender
Aside from the obvious ridiculousness of it, there's no reason why you can't play as a womyn or a tranny if so desired. The game even comes with a few female portraits.

Preferred Class
There are five classes in the game, of varying degrees of usefulness.
  • Pointman: Fast, but only able to equip pistols which sharply limits their offensive capability. Not something I would typically go for unless there's a very specific tactical need on the mission.
  • Assaulter: Standard trooper armed with a rifle or SMG. This is essentially the default class, with strong offensive output but no unique abilities unless equipped with specialized gear.
  • Breacher: Shotgunner who specializes in blasting open doors. I haven't used them much because they are painfully slow, but they give your team more flexibility in how to deal with room entry. Shotguns are powerful but must be used with extreme caution around hostages.
  • Stealth: Identical to the Assaulter, but can equip suppressed weapons. If the mission specifically calls for stealth, then I will switch our Assaulters over to this class for that purpose.
  • Shield: Carries a huge riot shield, and armed only with a pistol. Very, very, very slow. We can bust this guy out if for some oddball reason it fits the mission, but expect it to see very little use, if any.
As you can probably intuit, despite the available classes it turns out party composition really isn't much of a thing in this game. Most of the time it's best to stick with Assaulters / Stealth, a Breacher or two if you want, and possibly another type of specialist if the mission really calls for it. However if you're really keen on being a specialist guy, let me know and I'll do my best to accommodate. The name of the game is to have fun, after all, not create a perfect party.

Preferred Primary Weapon

There are quite a few gun choices in the game, but for the sake of efficiency I'm going to limit it to just a few. The differences seem to be fairly marginal anyway.

The most prestigious of police officers demand the most prestigious of weapons, which means there's really only one weapons manufacturer we can turn to: Heckler & Koch. Here are some of their fine offerings.

MP5 -- The classic 9mm SMG that took over the world in the latter half of the 20th century. Still a solid choice today and widely used irl... if anything it's probably underpowered in this game.

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UMP -- The younger and chonkier brother of the MP5. It shoots the heavier .45 ACP cartridge for better damage, but is less accurate and harder to handle effectively.

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MP7 -- A very slick machine pistol chambered in 4.6x30mm and designed to defeat body armor. Each bullet does low damage but it shoots really fast and accurately, and gives a small mobility bonus. Overall a pretty bad ass little gun.

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G36 -- Another German classic with stellar design. Rifles in this game are only semi-auto (presumably for balance reasons) but this one is a solid choice for CQB.

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HK416 -- This is HK's take on the AR-15 and it's a great performer. Good power, accuracy, and ergos, but it is also semi-auto only and a bit more difficult to maneuver in close quarters.

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Preferred Secondary Weapon
There are also three HK sidearms to choose from, although this is really only important for the Pointman and Shield classes. Standard troopers will almost never be deviating from their primary weapon.

VP9 -- A 9mm semi-auto pistol. Nothing special but pretty slick and gets the job done.

HfPZhzQ.png


HK45 -- A .45 ACP pistol for those who prefer the heavier cartridge. Another solid choice, just mind the lower magazine capacity.

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Mark 23 -- A throwback to the 90s, this thing is an absolute tank. Functionally very similar to the HK45 in game.

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Breachers can choose from the following shotguns.

M870 -- The classic pump shotgun, slightly shortened for better use in CQB. Powerful, not as quick on follow-up shots as a semi-auto but allows to throw one directly in the chamber for an emergency reload if needed.

DCRSsHa.png


KSG -- A sweet little bullpup shotgun. Super maneuverable and has a double-tube for more capacity, but reloads slowly.

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Six12 SD -- A semi-auto shotgun and suppressed to boot. Really slick design, good performer but the mag empties quick and is slow to reload.

U0QQwtG.png
Keep in mind there are other guns in the game too, so if you really want something different then let me know and maybe we can hook it up.

Portrait
Finally, figure out what you want for a portrait. Options are:
  • Default: A standard guy in SWAT gear. Helmet, sunglasses, punisher masks, and other mall ninja attire that communicates in no uncertain terms how Very Badass (tm) you are.
  • Game Portrait: The game comes with a lot of portraits of generic dudes. If you want to go this route, give me a short bio of your character (looks, attitude, etc) so I can properly select a portrait that embodies his spirit.
  • Custom: If you really want, I can make you a custom portrait without too much trouble. The portraits in-game are 395x273 (standard) and 60x60 (small) and must be in TGA format. If you post the image you want I can most likely make it work.
And there you have it! Let me know if any questions. There are 10 available slots so let's do this!
 
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Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
Oh, I almost forgot. We also need to choose a campaign! The game comes with 6 but these are the three that are long enough for an LP (i.e. 8 to 10 missions).


So if you have preference please specify that when you sign up!
 
Glory to Ukraine
Joined
Nov 22, 2020
Messages
2,164
Strap Yourselves In Codex Year of the Donut Codex+ Now Streaming!
Why the fuck no?

Josef Ĺ vejk
Parsimonious cook
Male
Assaulter
Ĺ korpion EVO 3 coz I am a patriot (though if this is HK only would settle for MP7)
Mark 23

Any default picture will do.

I only have hazy memories regarding these three campaigns, so I dont have a preference. Kinda surprising to read you dont use the shield guys much, I was using them a lot all the time. Youre in charge here though.
 

Andnjord

Arcane
Joined
Aug 22, 2012
Messages
3,027
Location
The Eye of Terror
Name
Claude Auchinleck

Callsign
The Auk

Gender
Alpha Male

Preferred Class
Stealth

Preferred Primary Weapon
MP7 PDW

Portrait:
Anything that resembles this:
330px-Cecil_Beaton_Photographs-_Political_and_Military_Personalities%3B_Auchinleck%2C_Claude_John_Eyre_IB2095_%28cropped%29.jpg


Campaign:
The Cell. Had to be that one or the Ski-Masks, since they were both hard and long, just like my [censored]!
 

boot

Prophet
Joined
Dec 20, 2015
Messages
1,016
Location
Bartow, FL
I didn't like this game but maybe should give it another chance. Throw me in if you want.

name: Joe
gender: male
class: pointman, you can pick weapons
portrait: I don't think there are img upload site that support tga
R27a11a10ebe783e68cad10fc5217766c
 
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Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
Parsimonious cook

Dossier said:
Excels in every aspect of field operations. Loves his country. Questionable views on body piercing.

RA9BxOi.png


I gave you a SP01 to match your Scorpion. CZ is good shit.

I only have hazy memories regarding these three campaigns, so I dont have a preference. Kinda surprising to read you dont use the shield guys much, I was using them a lot all the time. Youre in charge here though.

Is that so? I just never use shields due to their lack of speed. Open to ideas though.
 

Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
boot

Dossier said:
Fearless and quick on the trigger. Bit of a wild streak due to an unconventional upbringing. Spends a lot of time in front of the mirror posing and quoting lines from old action movies.

3ircCqB.png
 

Ghulgothas

Arcane
Joined
Feb 22, 2020
Messages
1,598
Location
So Below
Ah, RIP Andrew "AC/DC" Dawsky. You were the best breacher I ever had, may you slaughter your 1001 Junkie Harry's in Doorkickers heaven.

Anyways.

Isaac Adelschmidt
"Ghulgothas"
Housefly (Male)
Assaulter
G36 & the Mark 23 (Though my favorite is P90)

RedDeath.png

Lemme know if the portrait doesn't integrate properly, I can make a quick TARGA of it if needed.

I vote the Cell. Dissidents must learn to quiver in the face of the new, prosperous and peaceful world order.
 
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Andnjord

Arcane
Joined
Aug 22, 2012
Messages
3,027
Location
The Eye of Terror
I have no real idea to what I signed up to, but it's always more fun this way :lol:

I'm a little confused by our stats sheet, from the look of it it looks like our dudes already have a lots of experience and missions played. What gives?
 

Darth Roxor

Royal Dongsmith
Staff Member
Joined
May 29, 2008
Messages
1,878,404
Location
Djibouti
Name - Gromosław Czempiński

Callsign - Grom

Gender - men

Class - Breacher

Guns - M870 + HK45

Portrait - anything with a yuge 'stache

Campaign - The Cell. ISIS must be stopped.
 
Glory to Ukraine
Joined
Nov 22, 2020
Messages
2,164
Strap Yourselves In Codex Year of the Donut Codex+ Now Streaming!
Is that so? I just never use shields due to their lack of speed. Open to ideas though.

I am sure that you can get things done without shields as well, though I find that (especially when you buy some of the bigger shields that are available) the shieldbearers can reliably tank a whole lot of gunfire, which is very useful both when going through the doors (though obviously you have to be careful not to get flanked) as well as in the open (if the shields are in front the enemies will mostly focus fire on them). They have low firepower on their own, but assaulters advancing some distance behind shields can do the killing with rifles and SMGs.

 

ValeVelKal

Arcane
Joined
Aug 24, 2011
Messages
1,604
Name : Judy Hopps
CallSign : ValeVelKal
Gender : Male Rat, or Female rabbit
Class : Stealth when available, pointman otherwise, assaulter otherwise. Really it seems you will use only 2 classes.
Weapons : MP7//VP9
Portrait : either my avatar, or that :

0SHIEIw.png
 
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Unwanted

Savecummer

Latest Doxxer Account
Edgy
Joined
Mar 6, 2021
Messages
330
Name: Astolfo Gitler
Callsign: Kikeschreck
Gender: ...
Prefered Pronoun: Assault Helicopter
Primary gun: MP5, its cuuute
Secondary gun: HK45!
Pic:
ooqKWs5.jpeg
 

Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
Darth Roxor

Dossier said:
A true man amongst men. Hospital records from his birth indicate that he didn't cry upon exiting the womb, but the doctor was too afraid to slap him. It's rumored that if he shaves his mustache it will grow back within twenty minutes.

DzaAQsX.png
 
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Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
I'm a little confused by our stats sheet, from the look of it it looks like our dudes already have a lots of experience and missions played. What gives?

The game is weird in that it forces you to play missions and level up your guys before many of the features unlock.

0pDHQEb.png


You have an overall "squad level" that determines what you have access to and only increases as your officers gain experience. You can get experience in training missions or in campaigns, but at squad level 1 you only have access to the Pointman class and the campaigns are locked. Then as you level up it goes like this.

Level 4: Assaulter class unlocks.
Level 6: Campaigns become available.
Level 8: Shield class unlocks.
Level 12: Breacher class unlocks.
Level 16: Stealth class unlocks.

I thought it would make the LP more fun if I played training missions to reach squad level 16, so we could access all the classes and you guys could pick what you like. From my experience, even with moderately increased stats our guys are by no means unstoppable. The power curve seems to be quite shallow and my guess is that the harder campaigns are balanced around more experienced parties.

I should also mention that most of the gear is locked from the beginning too, and you unlock it by earning "stars" that you can buy items with. I think this is kind of a grindy and shit system, so I edited an XML file to unlock all the gear for us. I don't really see it as a cheat because the gear doesn't really have a classical progression where unlockables are vastly superior to starters. Like the MP7 and the HK416 each cost 20 stars or whatever to unlock, but they're not strictly superior to the MP5 you get for free. Each weapon has its strengths and weaknesses.

Again, I just thought it would be more fun to have all the role-playing options available for the LP. If this is a big deal for you guys then I can reset the game and just do the bare minimum of leveling to unlock the campaign, although that would obviously make our chances of survival even slimmer. :D

Let me know what you think!
 

Krivol

Magister
Joined
Apr 21, 2012
Messages
1,951
Location
Potatoland aka Prussia
We need more inclooooosiveness!

Forge Gloyd
Callsign - Rogue
Gender - men
Class - Assalut
Guns - MP7 - perfect for drive-by
Portrait - anything black... I mean, Person of Colour

Campaign - whatever

Gloyd loves bikes and stereo (espec. from cars). He also loves to dance, to breathe clear air on countryside and taking suspicious chemicals en masse.
 

Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
Savecummer

Dossier said:
A talented operative, but somewhat of a primadonna. Described by his prior commanding officer as "the Leonardo da Vinci of sexual harassment". Recommend monitoring closely.

zVx4a81.png
 
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Zanzoken

Arcane
Joined
Dec 16, 2014
Messages
3,559
Krivol

Dossier said:
A joyful guy who radiates hope and optimism. Enjoys listening to music. A major asset to the department, although the general feeling is he will eventually move on to become a doctor or an astronaut.

BOH0esI.png


You can tell this game is several years old because even though it ships with almost 100 portraits, the closest thing there was to a black dude is this...

94j96w8.png
 

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