Completed Let's Play Police Quest: SWAT 2 Terrorist Campaign

[Kalin]

Gentlemen, I recently finished Sierra's good old Police Quest: SWAT 2 and figured it would be pretty good LP material. Game is real-time tacticool but even I can play it on low speed. Obviously, we are playing the "terrorist" campaign i.e. the freedom fighters and not those debased cop bastards. The missions range from trivially easy to challenging. I will limit myself to using only the bros who sign up. Theoretically the game is quite mod-friendly but unfortunately it is not possible to change the in-game names. Adding Codex avatars might be possible, though it might be a bit of a slog-fest.

For now I'm going to need dedicated volunteers for the most prestigious patriotic duty imaginable - fighting the FED and destroying the NWO. Apply below and specify your preferred skill(s) and character aspects (race, gender, age, what have you). If you are found worthy I will assign a suitable character from the pool as I see fit based on my expert judgement. As we kidnap liberate and persuade members of the brainwashed public additional characters may become available.

SKILL LIST:

Hand Gun (frankly they suck)
Automatic Rifle (this is where it's at)
Sniper Rifle (I never use them, but pick if you want)
Hand-to-Hand (worthless)
Grenade (very useful)
Explosives (extremely useful)
Booby Trap (very useful)

And with that, some words from our glorious leader:




Mission #1 - Indoctrination
Mission #2 - Trailer Park Bloodbath
Mission #3 - Gangster Armory
Mission #4 - War on Drugs
Mission #5 - Das war ein Befehl
Mission #6 - Kikinapped
Mission #7 - Ransom
Mission #8 - True News
Mission #9 - Skankhunt
Mission #10 - College Recruitment Drive
Mission #11 - Loot, Shoot & Recruit
Mission #12 - The Manifesto
Mission #13 - Ambush
Mission #14 - Waco 2.0
Mission #15 - Lax

 

[Corvinus]

Reporting for duty!

ARs, grenades and booby traps to beat the militarized NWO puppets at their own game.
Any neanderthal bunkerdweller or backwater "survivalist" type would do. White israelite, obviously.

 

[Parsimonious cook]

Fuck, I recall playing the SWAT campaign when this came out ages ago, I am genuinly currious what the Five Eyes campaign looks like.

Would go for AR + explosives, whitey that looks like Hyram of House Decados prefered.

 

[Helly]

Not-A-Deer aka 'Nads' is a young(?) white(?) male(?) specialized in grenades and sniper rifles.

 

[Kalarion]

Not-A-Deer, Sir aka 'Nads'

You're welcome.

As for me, the ultimate in terrorist thought and action: straight white male specializing in ARs and grenades reporting.

 

[Zanzoken]

Hello, my name is Bill. I am something of an expert on booby traps. I don't really like the police anymore so I'll help you out if you want.

 

[lightbane]

What happened with your other LPs?

 

[Kalin]

What happened with your other LPs?

I had them REDACTED in response to grievous mod-fag excesses. They will live on in your heart.

Reporting for duty!

ARs, grenades and booby traps to beat the militarized NWO puppets at their own game.
Any neanderthal bunkerdweller or backwater "survivalist" type would do. White israelite, obviously.

Accepted! You're the lucky team leader of the Supreme Gentlemen. Each cell has three members, max deployment is 5 cells.

Amusingly you're also our best sniper. Auto rifles are better though and you can only carry one heavy rifle at a time.

Fuck, I recall playing the SWAT campaign when this came out ages ago, I am genuinly currious what the Five Eyes campaign looks like.

Would go for AR + explosives, whitey that looks like Hyram of House Decados prefered.

Prestigious choice. Not a lot of excessively fat pierced dudes in the family so this is the closest I got. 100% white.

A single training session will make you an expert gunner, gonna take a while to make you a good bomberman though.

(unless you have 100% skill explosives and traps can blow up in your face, 73% skill = 27% risk of screwing up and going BOOM!)

Not-A-Deer aka 'Nads' is a young(?) white(?) male(?) specialized in grenades and sniper rifles.

Yeah alright, you seem legit - third and final member of the Gentlemen, sniper/grenadier.

Sniping can only be done from special positions and I don't think all maps have those, we'll see.

As for me, the ultimate in terrorist thought and action: straight white male specializing in ARs and grenades reporting.

Cool, sounds like a plan. You're the leader of the Hymen Inspectors. Gave you a dummy grenade for good measure.

Hello, my name is Bill. I am something of an expert on booby traps. I don't really like the police anymore so I'll help you out if you want.

Hey hey hey! Ain't got no traps as of yet but once we can buy them you will be the go-to booby trapper.

Alright men, the squads are shaping up nicely and this is enough to tackle the first mission, but really, additional recruits are still needed. All the brethren who remain at Cognitive Elite Headquarters can train one of their skills while their bros are out in the field doing the missions. This is a good way to create buff strongmen and specialists who will come in handy later on.

 

[SerratedBiz]

Ready for action. Hand-to-hand master. Hand guns just to have a bludgeoning weapon. I hope you like pain.

 

[lightbane]

had them REDACTED in response to grievous mod-fag excesses. They will live on in your heart.

Ookay? I have not checked GD lately, as reality in Spain is depressing enough, so I dunno WTF was that about. I dunno if I have a heart, but at least I managed to read them in time, for what's worth. Anyways, any proper terrorist organization needs an evil (redundant) mudslime, expert in explosives, ready to kill, maim, burn, rape and decapitate women + young children and boys in the name of the religion of peace.

Spoiler

 

[baud]

I'm petty sure you've still have room for another government-hating bearded hick, ready to stick it up to the MAN with his AR and supply of explosives, no?

 

[Kalin]

SerratedBiz you're assigned to Hymen Inspectors, can buy you a combat knife if you want.

Turns out you're great at booby traps, might actually be useful if you hang in there.

lightbane you're in charge of the Western Civilization Defense Squad. Putting you on training so you will get 99% explosives skill.

Unfortunately you're a horrible shot, but like your bro above you can throw a nice punch. Can give you a knife as well if you want.

baud you got it! We ran out of body armour, I'm gonna give you auto rifle training to turn you into a real proper warrior.

And with that, time to actually play the game!

 

[Storyfag]

Still got room? AR and 'nades for #metoo.

 

[Kalin]

Heh last call there - put you in as the most potato looking fellow I could find. Giving you automatic rifle training.

 

[lightbane]

lightbane you're in charge of the Western Civilization Defense Squad. Putting you on training so you will get 99% explosives skill.
Unfortunately you're a horrible shot, but like your bro above you can throw a nice punch. Can give you a knife as well if you want.

Should have a more Mudslime's fitting name like Mohammed, as well as a beard and the evil looks, but perhaps the game doesn't let you do that. Are suicide-bombers a valid tactic?
As for the knife, that works, I would prefer a machete in order to decapitate women in the name of the religion of peace due being an unstable lone wolf, but maybe that's for later.

 

[Azira]

Will follow with interest, even if I'm not the one dying on the front-lines.
Should you need a warm body though, sign me up. I'll fill any available position. Using anal candles if possible.

 

[Kalin]

MISSION #1 - INDOCTRINATION

Alright, here we go. Decided not to make a video LP, screenshots über alles. Supreme Gentlemen and Hymen Inspectors are deployed.

Strategic overview of the training ground - hostages are in the "building" no doubt.

The sniper tower is just standing there, Helly gets to lay there with his expensive snipah rifle while the rest of the gang storm the building.

Oh yeah, phone is ringing:

You got it!

Bros barge in and... Helly spots a cop! Quick view on the map shows the enemy are in the SE.

First time I played this the "cops" camped in the North-East and had to be taken out with gorilla tactics.

Heheh - well they're all lined up so nicely, might as well fire at them.

Yeah bitch!

Third and fourth go down!

And with that...

Turns out the sniper tower is a TRAP if the cops take the southern route because by winning in 30 seconds we didn't have time to find the hostages.

Escaping with hostages give extra recruits and impacts the "score card" a lot, so thanks to Helly we didn't get any extra funds from glorious leader.

Also if I knew they'd do that I could've placed only Helly in the tower and put everyone else on training. Sub-optimal indeed.

Ah well, glorious leader is still pleased and offers a most inspiring haiku.

WCDS are primed and ready as well, time to welcome Azira to the club and tackle a real mission.

 

[janior]

put me in coach

 

[Parsimonious cook]

Turns out the sniper tower is a TRAP if the cops take the southern route because by winning in 30 seconds we didn't have time to find the hostages.

I guess that Justine Trudeau was right after all - If you kill your enemies, they win.

 

[lightbane]

Fighting for Equality, Ecstasy (?), Electricity (??), Environment and Education (???)... Some of these goals are a bit strange. I guess it's part of the plan of the great leader.

 

[Parsimonious cook]

Lenin said that communism is "government by the Soviets plus electrification of the whole land." We are obviously a left wing group of environmentally aware university graduates who like LSD.

 

[SerratedBiz]

I don't see how we're supposed to be finding Ecstasy when this is the biggest sausagefest ever, but ok.

 

[Kalin]

Working on update, meanwhile Azira is our tenth member of the Order. This is how I imagine him irl.

Training in booby traps while the boys are out playing, then explosives.

 

[Azira]

Beard looks about right, and in that timeline it seems like I decided to lose the ponytail.
Didn't quite remember my army training with handguns, but I sure do like boobies. Can't deny that.

 

[Storyfag]

I don't see how we're supposed to be finding Ecstasy when this is the biggest sausagefest ever, but ok.

It's about the ecstasy pills, not actual ecstasy