Let's play: Prisoner of Ice

[Stereotypical Villain]

Welcome back to the H.M.S. Victoria.

I really put my assburgers into overdrive last night and here's the result: You talk to Driscoll again. He's got some more dialogue options this time around.

"Stanley's trapped under a girder! We need to free him!"

"Take this walkie-talkie, go back down to the engine room and guise me! I'll operate the winch from here!"

So back down we go to put the walkie talking to use... better turn the machine on first though.

Right, time to use the walkie-talkie.

"Aye, aye, Admiral, aye, aye!"

Success. Now let's talk to the chap.

... I'll try again.

"I need to send an SOS! Driscoll says you can help me!"

"Stanley!!! Captain Lloyd is dead!"

"Get me the radio frequency!"

Finally. But let's search the room before we head over to the radio...

Could come in handy. Now over to the radio we go.

"No allied vessel will be able to locate us! We need to send something up to the surface!"

Alright. Let's ask him about the flooding chamber in the bunk room.

"How do we open the chamber?"

"The electrical control box used to actuate the opening of the chamber, Admiral! But in its present state it's about as much use as a dead fish!"

Another question for the road then.

"We could maybe fire a torpedo?"

"No!!! No-one will know where it came from! But we could maybe send someone up to the surface..."

"I'll go!"

Good luck with all that. You be sure and-

"Negative! If anyone should take this risk, it's me!"

We're very close to getting out of this damned submarine now, but it won't happen just yet because i'm a lazy bum. Expect another update soon.

 

[ghostdog]

"Negative! If anyone should take this risk, it's me!"

True hero ! (moron)

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

Here's a bit of information concerning the next update: Ryan may die by means of electrocution. Good times.

 

[poocolator]

True hero ! (moron)

Of course!
But where would be the fun were everyone to always do what was rational?

 

[WhiskeyWolf]

True hero ! (moron)

Of course!
But where would be the fun were everyone to always do what was rational?

I would watch that movie.

 

[poocolator]

True hero ! (moron)

Of course!
But where would be the fun were everyone to always do what was rational?

I would watch that movie.

Why? It would be so predictable.

 

[ghostdog]

True hero ! (moron)

Of course!
But where would be the fun were everyone to always do what was rational?

I would watch that movie.

Why? It would be so predictable.

Not if it came from Hollywood.

 

[Inziladun]

zing

 

[Gonchi]

Already dead?

 

[Azael]

Already dead?

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

Not quite yet. I've been unable to abuse the internet for a while since my internet provider is about as reliable as a great old one.

An update will be due tomorrow... Who knows, it may be a long one too since i've done nothing but playing Prisoner of Ice this week. (Okay, maybe some S.K.Y.W.A.Y. - Shadow of Chernobyl as well, but i still have alot of PoI goodies, not to mention crummy jokes, for you all so stay tuned.)

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

Welcome back to the dry humor show. I am your host, Villain, Stereotypical B.

Joining us today is our favorite chinese... "herb" specialist.

"...!"

Very good, very good.

Now... The problem presented before us is the following: We need to get into the torpedo room but the hatch has sealed since there is a leak in that very room. Ryan needs to...

1. Open the hatch.
2. Stop the leak.
3. Drain the water out of the torpedo room.
4. Shoot himself out of a torpedo hatch.

"You are foolish, wierd man in lab coat! What you need to do is find flare gun for otherwise you will have no way to signal ship when you reach surface! Hai!"

Fair enough. Let's inspect our previous endevours in the cargo room.

The chest is the answer, so let's use the key on that and pick up some supplies.

Wonderful. Now we need to get that infernal hatch opened.

Use the hatchet you picked up earlier on the electrical box located in the bridge.

... thus cracking it open.

Parker would've done a better job opening this blasted thing.

"Pardon me?"

Oh, nothing... nothing... Now go tamper with the wires, and make sure that your hands are wet.

*snigger*

"Are you sure that's safe?"

I'm a scientist, you can trust me.

"Oh, okay. I'll just fiddle around here a bit then..."

-some time later-

"All done."

What the hell? How did you... Oh, this is one of those wierd adventure games where no puzzle can kill you, isn't it?

"Yup. ^_^"

... douchebag.

As for the puzzle: You solve it by rerouting the cables away from the broken areas. It's quite simple, really.

Erm... anyway, over to the torpdeo room which is located undeneath the living quarters.

It's -quite- flooded.

...

And what'd you want to do with that, Ryan?

"Well, i thought i'd stick my finger in it."

... You must be kidding.

Your mother must be sooooooo proud of you.

"Putting finger in hole seems like bad idea! I once had brother who got stuck in finger trap and-"

...

"... he then stuck a wheel into the other part of the finger trap and turned it that is how he was freed!"

Hold on a sec... A wheel? Like the one on the broken door in the bridge maybe?

"That would work. Are you trapped in a finger trap as well?"

No, but we can stick that wheel into the hole in the torpedo room and then turn it and see what happens.

"...!"

Let's pick up the distress flare which sits neatly on a nearby torpedo first.

Now let's head over to the bridge and have a little chat with Driscoll before we remove the wheel.

"How can we flush out the torpedo room?"

"We can't do it from here! We need to enter the torpedo room!"

Ooookay... that was productive. The two other topics lead to the same stuff displayed earlier in this LP so let's just grab the wheel and we'll be on our way to the surface.

Now, trying to pull it off is just plain stupid. We'll need some kind of tool to do this... Perhaps an adjustable spanner?

So... Let's make this happen. Down we go to the torpedo room to put the damned wheel into the hole.

Now let's actually use the darned thing.

"Now let's turn the metal wheel... With a bit of luck... Success! The water is draining away!"

And now we shall open the torpedo hatch and then open one of the nearby torpedoes. Now we're ready to be shot out so let's signal Driscoll.

"Hold on tight, Admiral!! This'll keep your feet warm!!"

"But you are not wearing hat!"

Sigh...

Rescued at long last... But what'll happen when we report this "incident" to our superiors? What of the second crate? And what of that crazy "norwegian"? Well you'll just have to wait a day or two and you'll find out. Until then...

 

[Wyrmlord]

Stereotypical Villain, it is not you, it is the game.

One giant section, where they already and conspicuously reveal tentacles and takes place in nothing but a submarine; that doesn't quite work out.

I am sure this game will be great once you are actually in the Antarctic.

Right now, it is...bad.

They need to make a game based inside the twilit grottos resided by secret cults, where a few of Lovecraft stories take place. Those giant subterranean worlds are genuinely amazing.

 

[Gragt]

I found that the submarine was the best part of the game. Tells you something about what comes next.

 

[Darth Roxor]

The submarine was gud. Blowing it up was even better.

 

[ghostdog]

Well, it has nice graphics at least...

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

The game doesn't really start sucking until after the Falkland naval base.

Aaaanyway! I started this thread and by zee necronomicon i will finish it.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Omg spoilers

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

You're right, i really ought to blur that face.

Edit: Or put him behind a black box.

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

There's somethin' strangeeeee goin' on in a submarine! Who yo gonna call?

Hah hah... Hahah... Hahaaaaaa... Haaaa.... Noooo, you'd probably sex that tentacle monster up, "White Wolf". Shove off.

Anyway, we're going to put our trust in Ryan! Now on to the adventure.

So... let's talk to him.

"What happened to Hamsun?"

We found him exhaunsted inside a metal locker aboard the Victoria. He's been taken to the medical wing on the Base.

Now... what happened to the other crate?

"Is the last Polaris crate in safety, Captain Sears?"

"I've placed it under close watch. Nothing can happen to it."

No new dialogue options have popped up so let's leave and explore the base.

???: *knock knock knock*

"Thank you."

New dialogue options!

FILM!

"You have a projection room here on the base?

"Yes, but the projectionist has been confined to the barracks by quarter-master Quincy."

MISS MOLLY!

"Who is this Miss Molly, Captain?"

"The code name for one of our spies operating in Germany."

And that's the dialogue done and over with.

Our objectives are clear: Get the projectionist out so we can watch the movie.

"I must leave you, Lieutenant. I have matters to deal with."

"Wait in my office for Quincy. He'll give you your duty roster."

And out the door he goes, along with me since this is a short update to get the dialogue out of the way for this evening, when i begin investigating this base. There'll be pyromania, stealing and forgery! Good times indeed, but for now i bid you good day.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Talk about a bad case of spine deformation in that soldier on the right.

 

[ghostdog]

There's somethin' strangeeeee goin' on in a submarine! Who yo gonna call?

We actually both thought of using the same stupid joke at the same time ? THE END IS NIGH !

 

[poocolator]

My penis is rarely at ease.

 

[Stereotypical Villain]

Sorry about not delivering the update on time, but i've got an excuse! My computer recived a very nasty little virus this morning and i've had to spend the entire day cleaning up the mess. Suffice to say i lost most of my files, but i did manage to save my PoI files! I'll have an update ready for you guys by tomorrow.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Don't give me excuses, give me RESULTS *slap*