Let's Play Way of the Samurai! #6

[Genma:TheDestroyer]

Right on time, like I said.





Last time on Way of the Samurai: Kitcho reunited with his father in a tearful reunion, that girl in the yellow kimono confessed she does indeed enjoy fantasy rape, and Tsubohachi began the journey to womanhood. Actually, none of that happened.


We now return to a shameless bullying in progress.

He's pretty sorry he didn't pass away in his sleep last night.

I'm going to leave before I do something both of us, but mostly him, come to regret.

Oh shit, they're feeding on their own now!

False alarm.

And that's half the battle.

Nothing here seems to make any sense.

*Sigh*

"Hey retards."

Ah, he's got some sanity left.

"But if it were made up of old people you'd be set, right?"

"What?"

"Nothing."

"And they didn't spend half their budget on custom, impractical clothing."

"Who said that? Come closer so I can see you."

Always.

"How much force would it have taken for my guts to squirt out like chunky mustard? Dunno, but I know how much that train would use."

There you go, Brother None. Proof those headbands are actually messing with their sight. They can't tell if I'm me.

"Hey y'all, I have seen some things. We need to talk."

"...which is great, because I can't. Peace out."

"That's what Chelsea's going to say."

"That's what..dammit!"

"No more pedo laugh for you."

"......'sup?"

"You cannot delay any longer. Boxers or briefs?!"

"Those bastards have been abusing townfolk!"

*Whisper*

"Oh."

"Or I'll beat you like I beat myself at night!"

"..."

"..."

The mannequin talks?

Now it makes sense. He borrowed Kitcho's spine for awhile.

*Snort*

"You say something, new guy?"

I did not expect him to be the motivational speaker of the group. Thought conversations around him would be more like *chop* chop* "Is that my torso you're hacking?!" *chop* "It IS! My precious torso!"

"...so you'll do it...here? I think I lost track of things somewhere."

"Yeah, that's a great idea. Make the guy who joined because you pulled him off the train tracks jump in between the leader and one of his top lieutenants. Here's a better one."

"This from the broad who just sits around flirting."

So of course she doesn't listen, and jumps in between them.

Karibe, frustrated with the whole thing, makes a very big mistake. He slashes her.

And what happened then? Well...in Rokkotsu they say-

That Kitcho's pimp hand for smacking punk-ass bitches grew three sizes that day.

"Damn. Kitcho be buck nasty."

"My pride is shattered, but I never had much of that anyway."

Like hell, you wallflower. Only Genma gets to mutter in disgust. You willingly signed into the madness. Most of this is your fault for getting chicken-head riled up. Hm.

"So...meeting adjourned? Great talking with all of you."

"Me?"

"Don't get me started."

Because Kitcho apparently lets his underlings run wild up until they do something he disagrees with, which means Akadama discipline is crap. Hyuga likes stirring up the pot, and Chelsea doesn't know when to sit on the side-lines.

"If anyone's interested, I found out a secret way into the Kurou Compoud. We could go raid it later on tonight. Fun, destruction, maybe booze and women. It'll be a bonding experience!"

"So, nobody then?"

"What about Karibe's sword?"

"Awesome."

"At least something good came from that clusterfuck. Got me a new swoooooooorrd!"



Meanwhile

Oh look, it's the pussy that destroyed a thousand armies.

And him.

Something's just not right about Hyuga. The way he set this confrontation up, then plots in the background while everyone else broods. You'd almost think that...that...

Goddammit.

 

[anus_pounder]

Fuck yeah. Glad to see these fucks are fucking their own shit up.

 

[DwarvenFood]

Yaay, thanks for the update !! keep it up.

 

[Radisshu]

The plot thickens.

 

[Cenobyte]

Hell yeah. Awesome stuff

 

[Yeesh]

Ah so.

 

[Fafnir]

Yaay, thanks for the update !! keep it up.

 

[anus_pounder]

btw, are you using an emulator?

 

[Genma:TheDestroyer]

btw, are you using an emulator?

Yeah, PCSX2. 0.9.7 (r3113) It's why I have this set on Easy for the first go round. It takes some getting used to, even with the ability to map controls and make things more comfortable.

 

[anus_pounder]

btw, are you using an emulator?

Yeah, PCSX2. 0.9.7 (r3113) It's why I have this set on Easy for the first go round. It takes some getting used to, even with the ability to map controls and make things more comfortable.

And the game itself? Did you use your own CD or did you download it.

EDIT: Stupid question. I did a search and found no torrents for this (or for that matter, the 2nd one) that had live seeds. No need to answer.

 

[Genma:TheDestroyer]

btw, are you using an emulator?

Yeah, PCSX2. 0.9.7 (r3113) It's why I have this set on Easy for the first go round. It takes some getting used to, even with the ability to map controls and make things more comfortable.

And the game itself? Did you use your own CD or did you download it.

EDIT: Stupid question. I did a search and found no torrents for this (or for that matter, the 2nd one) that had live seeds. No need to answer.

Piratebay. 'Way of the Samurai 1 & 2' will find the one I used. Which is convenient, because I plan to LP the second one once I've explored all the paths of this one.

 

[anus_pounder]

of all the places I didn't check. Thanks a lot bro.

 

[Genma:TheDestroyer]

It's time. No more in-fighting and drama, no more mustache twirling shenanigans...I'm going to check out that backdoor into the Kurou compound. Surely I'll find something worth the hassle, eh? Everyone else is too busy brooding or being dead to join in, so its all up to me. For great justice!

This is Karibe's sword, Samehada-tou. It gives us no bonuses to defense, but a stronger offense than what we're currently packing. -100 Life is kind of a downer.

Also, Chelsea is apparently the exception to the Akadama rule in that she's up to something tonight. I honestly could not give less of a fuck. *Puts Chelsea on Ignore*

Let's head out on and see what's what.

Kurou punks on our turf, for one thing. Only I'm allowed to trespass and rifle through people's shit. Fortunately, they stroll on through without incident. We'll be going where they came from, the exit to the right of the bridge.

Welcome to the Foundry, the key to this whole conflict. The Government wants it, the Kurou want to sell it, and the Akadama want to prevent the deal from taking place. While taking control of it themselves and thus having the means to stockpile arms for the grand revolution to follow.

With the Foundry being an area of importance, and the Akadama nearby, you'd expect a heavy Kurou force to be standing guard.

But no, it's just those two chatting assholes again.

While they talk, I'd like to point out my health is down because of a couple wandering Kurou thugs I met on the way.

Posting fights with the random trash mobs would take forever. Just few here or there is fine.

That said, these two talk more than they guard. Even as a soldier on the opposite side of the war, you have to be able to respect your enemies. I can't do that if they're part of it.

Besides, here's that opportunity to try out Samehada-tou for myself.

Oh, fuck no. I know this game, I get suckered into a conversation and sooner or later my brain goes numb and I look like a punchline in a /b/ Garfield strip.

"I'm injured, this sword's sucking away my life, and I can't see anything. That enough of a handicap for you?"

Samehada-tou seems to tend toward knockdown attacks. Even these base moves have that effect.

*Insert outdated pop-culture reference to wrap up battle* "You are the weakest link..."

"..GOODBYE!"

Now that's a stylish death animation to end a fight. I know it had absolutely nothing to do with my new sword, but I'd like to think Karibe is smiling from whatever tentacled hell he's experiencing.

Screw the mushrooms, these things are awesome.

What kind of swords were these two retards carrying?

The defense stat is by far better than anything else I have, but nothing else is improved and it only has one durability. Meaning it would shatter the first time I got into any extended battle. Pass.

*Sigh* What a promising name.

Sure enough, trash.

The Foundry's rear exit takes us back to the bridge where this whole mess started. We'll go through there on the way to the compound.

And of course we've stumbled onto a war zone. Told you this kind of thing would be popping up more often now.

"Never fear, backup is here!"

"Hey, isn't that Karibe's sword?"

"Never mind that."

Every bit as brutal as I'd expect from this sword.

With the opposition forces trimmed a bit, the minions can hold the line from here.

I have shit to do and hanging around here isn't part of it.

Who this might be?

A question for another day, sadly.

So far, so good. Only one Kurou on patrol.

If he knows what's good for him...

..He'll pass right on by. Awesome.

Well, it's a good thing we know of another way in.

...That's it? The secret way in is basically the grocery door?

So here I am. That was a test of my infiltration skills.

A guard is patrolling nearby, so I duck into an alcove with a very conveniently placed ladder.

I dunno, maybe from a distance I look like the rest of the Kurou. Green=friend. Would explain why the Akadama still occasionally attack me.

Hello, this looks like an invitation to me.

Guy could get lost in this place. I keep expecting to turn a corner and run into Kareem Abdul-Jabaar and get my ass kicked. Or maybe just Tsubohachi making sweet love to a goat.

"OH JESUS I SWEAR TO YOU I'M NOT BRUCE LEE AND I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE ONE OF THE GREATS AND-"

"-I SWEAR IF YOU'LL JUST LET ME GO I'LL LEAVE AND NEVER EVEN GO NEAR A PAGODA FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE-"

"-AND...wait, who the fuck are you?"

"No, that was my question. Put down that sword before you hurt yourself, Buckwheat."

"You've gotta be kidding me."

"Now how about we slow down, and answer a few questions. You obviously aren't from around here, and that box seems pretty important."

Have you ever seen someone break-dance with a sword, before? Yeah, you're about to.

"Okay, that did it. I don't care if we're only a couple thin walls away from an army of douches."

"It's on!"

I'd like to note that at one point he whistled and called down a hawk to contribute to my beating. How it got through, I'll never know.

Too busy getting a mudhole stomped in me, you see.

But finally...

I nailed that sonuvabitch.

I don't know who he was (aside from a name), why he was here or why he attacked me. Probably never find out, either. But I'm sure of two things.

1. He thrashed me worse than anyone has so far.

2. He seemed interested in this tastefully gaudy box.

I'm getting out of here before Samuel L. Jackson himself shows up with a sword and a chip on his shoulder.

In my haste, forgetting to check if Kunta Kinte's sword is any good.

"Hey."

"Yo."

Well that went better than I expected.

"WAIT A MINUTE!!!"

Shit! Run!

"Suck on it, Kurou chumps!"

"Nyaya!"

"No, the other guy with our super secret box!"

"We are not very good at keeping secrets hidden."

"Shut up."

Oh thank god. Between the patrols, the layout and Dennis Rodman's grandpa, I didn't know if I'd actually be able to pull this off. To hell with the Akadama, I'm striking back at the Kurou on my own! Ha!

No, no no no. Not somebody else.

Okay, change of plans; instead of going out through town, we'll head back the way we originally came. The Shrine should be abandoned right now.

"Sayonara, whoever you are."

...This is karma, isn't it.

So I either run full tilt past him into town, or I stand my ground and see what he wants.

When my broken ass knees can support me enough to stand, that is.

Okay, fine. We'll play his game. But too bad for him, there's a handy source of 'get yourself in shape' nearby.

Looks like he's decided to make his move.

"I have had a really bad past couple of days. Bring.it.on."

"Think you're up for it, old man?"

*Spoiler Alert* Yes he most definitely was up for it.

WHEN KEEPING IT REAL GOES WRONG

That thing I said about 'Don' having whooped my ass the worst? Forget about it. Just forget I ever said it.

Right, we're in a bit of a bad situation. We have Kurou property, and this guy obviously belongs to their group.

Oh fuck me. Tesshin. Tesshin Kurou.

"Was that black guy with you, afterall?

The chick in the kimono we saw earlier on? What happened up there?

I just got caught and manhandled by Tesshin Kurou. The leader of the Kurou Clan.

When someone tells him I'm with Akadama, he'll have double the reasons tear me apart. And as it is, I only survived because he got bored and had something else to take care of.

And there's nothing to show for any of this. My prize is gone.

We're going home.

"Haven't we been over this many times before?"

"What?"

Ah, more skirmishes.

"You do that. I just don't care anymore."

Next update whenever I feel like it.[/img][/I]

 

[spekkio]

One update in a month?

(takes notes)

 

[anus_pounder]

Wow, just when I thought you had mastered every enemy...

EDIT: Could you post or PM me what keys you selected for your controls?

EDIT 2 : How the fuck do you use this emulator thingamajig? I used the default settings for configuration, placed the bios in the torrent in a bios folder, selected the ISO and then ran the Emulator. I was then bombarded with several messages telling me a memory card couldn't be made and a file was missing, the game just stuck on a black screen after that. Looks like I'm too next-gen to use emulators.

 

[Codexlurker]

*sighs* Looks like I won't seeing the true ending. Nice update, and don't ever say you've mastered the game until you have beaten him. I was able to the after beating the game once or twice.

 

[anus_pounder]

His skills are that extreme, then?

 

[Genma:TheDestroyer]

His skills are that extreme, then?

There's a partial handicap in that I'm also taking pics with Fraps while fighting, so my attention is a bit split every time I see a nice move. Combined with still not being completely comfortable with the keyboard while playing WotS and...there you go.


That said, Tesshin is one of the strongest fighters around, even on the Easy mode I've started this playthrough on. He juggles like mad (you don't see it, but his rising strike kept me in the air for two more flips before punching me back down), he can guard on a dime, and he falls for obvious feints a lot less often than almost everyone else.

On harder modes, Karibe believe it or not isn't that far behind. He had a windmill technique that knocks you around, is hard to get out of, and may take your entire health bar out.

 

[Codexlurker]

His skills are that extreme, then?

Honestly, he's not anal hard. I was playing the PS2 version(rented it) and I didn't have much of a problem due to the fact that I had good controls. Playing this on an emulator would suck ass.

 

[Genma:TheDestroyer]

Small update today, yet packed with some important events. Another will be coming along within a few days.

Tail tucked between his legs, our glorious (yet reluctant) revolutionary retreats to the Akadama mansion. The bitter taste of failure stuck to the back of Genma's craw like caramel on teeth. Victories over Tsubohachi and other wandering samurai had swelled the head, and dulled the blade.

Perhaps now is the time for peaceful contemplation of the situation.

A mind at work is aided by a healthy constitution.

Oh ho, what could this be about?

Looks like introspection may have to wait for another day. Our idealistic allies apparently have a bug up their ass about something.

Show them, brother.

Well, unless you run into anyone other than the standard Kurou grunt. The elite will probably kick your ass, the asses of your friends, and then smack your mama around a few times just for good measure. But hey, no pressure.

"Pardon me, my good zealot."

Aw nuts.

As if seeing Tesshin Kurou once wasn't enough, Kitcho's getting ready to start the meat grinder up and send us all in. I suppose this is what I get for not drinking a tall cup of chillthefuckout last night.

But on the other hand, Kitcho will probably be the one who has to deal with boss Kurou, while I'll be facing one of the Lieutenants. My record against their level of fighter isn't too terribly bad...yeah, I can do this.

Let's go!

Wild West: Japan Edition

Just sparring, though why they're using live blades does confound me a bit.

Here comes the man of the hour.

"Yo, reporting in and all that. Yes, I know my clothes have a lot more tears than yesterday. No, not all of the blood is mine. Can we just move on?"

"I call any other guy who doesn't look like he ate a demon."

It's most certainly not what I want to do. What I want to do is sleep in peace for a few days and then maybe find a hotspring. But nobody gives two shits what I want. I'm the new guy.

Which I could have gotten in on, but had other plans. Once I've done playthroughs of all the main paths, we'll go back and hit any random events we missed along the way like this.

"Actually, I'm kinda cool with waiting. Don't rush on my account."

We're over there more than some of the actual Kurou members.

"So I hear you found out about the back entrance."

"You know?!"

"Everybody knows. We heard that ass kicking clear over here."


"Dammit."

"Or you can hide behind me if you like. I'll save you if my father shows up."

"Okay, seriously. That got old awhile ago."

"Heh."

Hey, it's Snidely Whiplash. What's he doing here and not, y'know, running interference for us or something?

Kitcho never seems to know where any of his higher ups are. They just wander around at will. Pretty sure this is why nothing ever gets done.

"And whimpering counts as a noise."


"Man, fuck you."

"Sorry, I prefer Chealsea!"

"That's what Tsubohachi said!"

*Grumble* "Thinks he's so great."

Feudal era bellhop?

"Are the croissants complete?"

I think shit just got real.

? Indeed.

Hence egging on Karibe, and the whole situation that followed. Including whatever Chelsea tried to do.

I love this shot, simply because Genma has the perfect 'well, duh, what did you think he meant' look on his face.


Oh, and Kitcho just gave our position away.

Answer me honestly, you keep waiting for the dude in the green to offer to take your bags, don't you?

Not the sharpest knife in the drawer? Kitcho's would be made of Nerf. It's understandable to look for the best in comrades, but c'mon. It's Hyuga.

"He wins the prize, congratulations!"


"Shut up Genma, before I send a message telling my father you've been sleeping with Madam Murasaki."


"Bitch in the black kimono? She's already dead."


"WHAT?!"

Wait, that pose Hyuga's in...

Ninjas. Not just ninjas, government ninjas. Death and taxes in one form. Killed by something funded by *my* money. If I wasn't a broke ass samurai who avoids paying financial debts at all costs, of course.

"This is what I've had to deal with every damn day since I got here. You believe this?"


"Genma, stop talking to the voices in your head and move it!"

"Crappy ninjas!"

Rule #1: Never start up a move involving a fancy twirl when your opponent is getting ready to jam his sword upward. Nastiness happens.

"BLOOD AND THUNDER!"

"VICTORY AT SEA!"

"I am going to fucking kill both of you. I swear to our heathen Japanese god."

Meanwhile, Koizumi the government toady lasted all of three seconds against a similarly pissed Kitcho.

No, he's not doing a handstand. The ninja behind me is hopping around like a rubber ball, just barely managing to evade Kitcho's attacks. He sneaks one of his own through, not that it did any good. Kitcho's got defenses like a rock, the health bar diminished maybe a sliver.

"Show me your honor, chump."

"Sorry 'bout this, I've just got a lot of misplaced aggression right now. Last night was a really bad night."

"Now to help out against-"

Guess it kind of solved itself.

Again, Lieutenant<<Leader. He's naive, but you don't want to mess with Kitcho.

Both the Akadama and the Kurou still exist, and Hyuga's last act didn't accomplish a damn thing.

There's no doubt about it.

But then again, now Kitcho's gonna focus on the one group I was even less enthusiastic to tangle with than Tesshin's boys. And if they know their secrecy is shot to shit, it may not be much longer before we're all bull-rushed.

"To pack their bags, because we're leaving town with what we can carry?"

"Not quite."

"Wherever it is you're going, I'll back you up."

"...send me a post card from the dungeons. Do they have dungeons? It seems like they would."

We really should be returning back to base, of course.

But I had to salvage something from this encounter, didn't I?

They give you cool moves, but so far the swords of the other important fighters haven't been overwhelmingly good stat-wise. I'm going to stick to Samehada-tou and carry Karibe's legacy into the coming battles. Let's get back to the mansion before the Situation Reminder nags me to death.

"Y'know, I just realized that the rest of the Akadama lieutenants are dropping like flies. Aside from me, the only real one left is Chelsea. But what are the odds that the foreign girlfriend who means everything to the leader will die a dramatic death, opening the way for a further grab of power within the group?"


...

"Hacha! Gonna get a promotion! Lieutenant-Commander. Supreme-Lieutenant! I like the sound of that."

"Am I letting this go to my head? Nah."

 

[Radisshu]

Haha, awesome.

 

[DwarvenFood]

You running with the crate was hilarious to see.. great updates again !

 

[anus_pounder]

Genma's monologue really adds to the LP.

 

[Fafnir]

Haha, awesome.

 

[anus_pounder]

So, you're really going to do all the main paths? Admirable. Also, by the final path I'm sure you'll be able to beat the toughest guys with the starting sword. The continuous increase in Genma's power is something I'm looking forward to.