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Lore & Story

Sneaky Seal

Aurum Dust
Developer
Joined
Sep 14, 2016
Messages
346
Location
Sealand-upon-Duck
chapter-ii-669x272.jpg

Ash of Gods story is based of an unpublished book that is still being worked on by a russian fantasy author Sergey Malnitsky. It introduces the setting, all the characters and serves as a canon for the story.

If you would like to be among the first ones to get acquainted with the game's story and enjoy reading fantasy - you can read the already published prologue as well as the first and second chapters on our website (texts are a bit too long to post here)
What do you think of it? In particular:
  • Do you like the IP (world, locations, factions)?
  • Do you find the characters likeable?
  • What do you think of the writing/dialogues part?

Any other feedback you might have will also be greatly appreciated, thank you in advance.
 

MRY

Wormwood Studios
Developer
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
5,703
Location
California
At a very superficial level, these names are kind of offputting: "Hopper" immediately calls to mind the cop in Stranger Things; "Albus" Dumbledore, and Wodan of the Norse Gods. Reading the first paragraph, the "Milky Mountains" sound like an unholy cross between the Misty Mountains of Tolkien and Grand Tetons. In general, the names seem pretty bricabrac -- Terminus, Hel, Vandila, etc. It reminds me of jRPGs, which I've always felt were based on someone just snatching names from Western culture without really understanding what they meant.

I didn't read much of it (no time), but that was my two minutes' reaction.
 

Sneaky Seal

Aurum Dust
Developer
Joined
Sep 14, 2016
Messages
346
Location
Sealand-upon-Duck
At a very superficial level, these names are kind of offputting: "Hopper" immediately calls to mind the cop in Stranger Things; "Albus" Dumbledore, and Wodan of the Norse Gods. Reading the first paragraph, the "Milky Mountains" sound like an unholy cross between the Misty Mountains of Tolkien and Grand Tetons. In general, the names seem pretty bricabrac -- Terminus, Hel, Vandila, etc. It reminds me of jRPGs, which I've always felt were based on someone just snatching names from Western culture without really understanding what they meant.

I didn't read much of it (no time), but that was my two minutes' reaction.

Well, you have to get the inspiration from somewhere:
  • Hopper is from the norwegian "hap", which means "hope";
  • "Albus" means "white" in Latin;
  • "Terminus" is also from Latin, means "border" in a sense of known world vs terra incognita.
So there is a logic and structure behind it - old locations are named in Latin with newer settlements and characters having names derived of some modern languages. The same way there is logic to the names of all the otehr character/locations.
 

MRY

Wormwood Studios
Developer
Joined
Aug 15, 2012
Messages
5,703
Location
California
Well, I don't want to discourage you guys! Your game looks lovely and you seem well-intentioned. Also, it's not like I'm the sage of the age (though of course I know that Albus and Terminus come from Latin).

But I will say that there are three separate things you need to consider:

(1) Is your use of multiple different linguistic/cultural sources consistent and coherent, or does it make your setting look like a hodgepodge?

(2) Even if you have some independent justification for where you are getting your names from (e.g., "I took my dwarf names from the Edda, not LOTR, it's not my fault they're the same!"), are they so strongly associated with a work of popular culture that it comes too freighted?

(3) Are the names just plain goofy (like "Milky Mountains")?
 

Sneaky Seal

Aurum Dust
Developer
Joined
Sep 14, 2016
Messages
346
Location
Sealand-upon-Duck
Well, I don't want to discourage you guys! Your game looks lovely and you seem well-intentioned. Also, it's not like I'm the sage of the age (though of course I know that Albus and Terminus come from Latin).

But I will say that there are three separate things you need to consider:

(1) Is your use of multiple different linguistic/cultural sources consistent and coherent, or does it make your setting look like a hodgepodge?
(2) Even if you have some independent justification for where you are getting your names from (e.g., "I took my dwarf names from the Edda, not LOTR, it's not my fault they're the same!"), are they so strongly associated with a work of popular culture that it comes too freighted?
(3) Are the names just plain goofy (like "Milky Mountains")?

Thank you for your input, sorry for getting back to you late. You might be right - once we do playtests with real players we can always easily change the names based on their feedback.
 

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