Cheesecake
Savant
- Joined
- Oct 7, 2015
- Messages
- 137
Humanity had reached the pinnacle of evolution. They had arrived at the zenith of technological advancement. They had conquered and colonized every possible home in the galaxy.
Yet, they were dying.
The records of how are lost to the eons, but in a blink of an eye the human race was wiped out. Or so we thought.
This is why we have assembled this Singular search party - to find a sacred data-crypt, and reawaken the progenitor of our species. The last human.
-----
DATA CRYPT REACTIVATED
Searching....
Files corrupted: 98. Files deleted: 3.
File found - materializing started. Data-to-organics transfer completed. Organics synthesizers activated. File 006 rebirth started.
Organic target age: 25. File chronological age: 843,065.
Biological assessment: success. Mental assessment: memories corrupted.
Rebirth chamber opening.... Stand clear.
-----
Singular Team 3 Logs.
Day 16: Our team has finally translated the holy control-slate. We are pleased. Grand Brain has begun the rebirth process of humanity. We cannot wait to learn what they know.
Day 30: Stupid machine is stupid. Take too long. Grand Big is getting impatient. Grand Big eat another grunt. I hope Grand Big not eat me before human wake up. I want see how big human is.
Month 6, Day 23: Grand Big finally eat me. Eating me as I type. Hope have enough fingers to write letter. Dear mate, I-
Month 6, Day 24: The great oaf finally ate his last grunt. I've ordered another clutch of Beh-ig grunts and hope they hatch and grow before they reach here. The Grand Bucks is gonna be mad.
Year 3, Month 1, Day 1: The process is complete. The human is reborn! Today would be marked down in the annals of history forever - if another event hadn't seized the day. The reports have just come in. The Singularity is dead. The Singular is divided. The Arch Brain, Arch Big and Arch Bucks have declared a three-way war.
This human is our last hope.
----
Through the mist you step, feeling for the first time the cold floor under your feet. Metal, if you remember correctly. Your eyes water as blinding lights dance in front of you, and a cacophony assaults your ears while strange scents overwhelms your nose.
There's too much happening - and too much that has happened. But what happened? You can't remember. Your memory's there, just not together. Something important. There's something very important.
"Hey! Are you well?" A monotone drawl becomes clear amid the noise. You can faintly see the outline of a ball floating towards you. Wait. Not a ball. A brain?
"I'm fine." Your eyes adjust, and your other senses follow suit. "What's happened? Who are you? Are we safe?" Wait, safe? From what? You can't remember.
"Stay calm," it says, once more in its drawl. "I must perform the medical examination. We do not possess anatomical knowledge of your advanced body, but we will do our best."
-----
"Your name?"
____
"Are you a male or female?"
"Isn't it obvious? I mean, look at it down there!"
A. Male.
B. Female.
After a battery of further tests, they let you rest. You bask in the peace of solitude, your eyes assaulted by aliens. Aliens! Floating brains, walking slabs of muscle, and small robots. All of them tinier than you, like the size of a child. They look so odd, so freakish, yet so familiar....
Three of them, larger than the rest, approach you. A writhing brain encased in a levitating chair scans you with multiple cybernetic eyes. A (relatively, compared to every other alien) hulking brute stares up at you, equal parts hungry and inspired. A robot begins whirring and beeping.
A period of silence begins, and after a while you grow impatient. "What the hell is going on?"
"We are what remains of the Singular, an empire that has fallen mere moments before your birth. Our three races have declared war, but our search party was separated and unaware of the conflict."
"We not join war. We still fight and eat for Singularity."
"The Singularity is dead, Grand Big." The robot clanks and whistles. "Projected profit loss -" the robot stops as you hear an internal explosion coming from its head. "Projected profit loss is too great to simulate. I am saddened by this loss of Space Bucks."
"Get to the point. Where am I?"
"You are approximately 800,000 years in the future. Your race is extinct. The data-crypt that housed your data-corpse has sadly lost all power giving birth to you. You are all that's left."
The slab of muscle eyes you. "We need help to reunite the Singular. You do this, I promise many things for eating!"
"And you will gain a healthy share of the profit, of course."
You deliberate in your mind for a moment. You decide to:
A. Accept to help them reunite the Singular, or whatever it is they want.
B. Decline and go on your own. You never signed up for this.
C. Decline and go help those muscly aliens. The strong need to rule, and with your size and strength they will definitely win!
D. Decline and go help the floating brains. They're probably the only ones smart enough who could properly help you.
E. Decline and go help the robots. They obviously know how to run the economy, and money solves everything!
Yet, they were dying.
The records of how are lost to the eons, but in a blink of an eye the human race was wiped out. Or so we thought.
This is why we have assembled this Singular search party - to find a sacred data-crypt, and reawaken the progenitor of our species. The last human.
-----
DATA CRYPT REACTIVATED
Searching....
Files corrupted: 98. Files deleted: 3.
File found - materializing started. Data-to-organics transfer completed. Organics synthesizers activated. File 006 rebirth started.
Organic target age: 25. File chronological age: 843,065.
Biological assessment: success. Mental assessment: memories corrupted.
Rebirth chamber opening.... Stand clear.
-----
Singular Team 3 Logs.
Day 16: Our team has finally translated the holy control-slate. We are pleased. Grand Brain has begun the rebirth process of humanity. We cannot wait to learn what they know.
Day 30: Stupid machine is stupid. Take too long. Grand Big is getting impatient. Grand Big eat another grunt. I hope Grand Big not eat me before human wake up. I want see how big human is.
Month 6, Day 23: Grand Big finally eat me. Eating me as I type. Hope have enough fingers to write letter. Dear mate, I-
Month 6, Day 24: The great oaf finally ate his last grunt. I've ordered another clutch of Beh-ig grunts and hope they hatch and grow before they reach here. The Grand Bucks is gonna be mad.
Year 3, Month 1, Day 1: The process is complete. The human is reborn! Today would be marked down in the annals of history forever - if another event hadn't seized the day. The reports have just come in. The Singularity is dead. The Singular is divided. The Arch Brain, Arch Big and Arch Bucks have declared a three-way war.
This human is our last hope.
----
Through the mist you step, feeling for the first time the cold floor under your feet. Metal, if you remember correctly. Your eyes water as blinding lights dance in front of you, and a cacophony assaults your ears while strange scents overwhelms your nose.
There's too much happening - and too much that has happened. But what happened? You can't remember. Your memory's there, just not together. Something important. There's something very important.
"Hey! Are you well?" A monotone drawl becomes clear amid the noise. You can faintly see the outline of a ball floating towards you. Wait. Not a ball. A brain?
"I'm fine." Your eyes adjust, and your other senses follow suit. "What's happened? Who are you? Are we safe?" Wait, safe? From what? You can't remember.
"Stay calm," it says, once more in its drawl. "I must perform the medical examination. We do not possess anatomical knowledge of your advanced body, but we will do our best."
-----
"Your name?"
____
"Are you a male or female?"
"Isn't it obvious? I mean, look at it down there!"
A. Male.
B. Female.
After a battery of further tests, they let you rest. You bask in the peace of solitude, your eyes assaulted by aliens. Aliens! Floating brains, walking slabs of muscle, and small robots. All of them tinier than you, like the size of a child. They look so odd, so freakish, yet so familiar....
Three of them, larger than the rest, approach you. A writhing brain encased in a levitating chair scans you with multiple cybernetic eyes. A (relatively, compared to every other alien) hulking brute stares up at you, equal parts hungry and inspired. A robot begins whirring and beeping.
A period of silence begins, and after a while you grow impatient. "What the hell is going on?"
"We are what remains of the Singular, an empire that has fallen mere moments before your birth. Our three races have declared war, but our search party was separated and unaware of the conflict."
"We not join war. We still fight and eat for Singularity."
"The Singularity is dead, Grand Big." The robot clanks and whistles. "Projected profit loss -" the robot stops as you hear an internal explosion coming from its head. "Projected profit loss is too great to simulate. I am saddened by this loss of Space Bucks."
"Get to the point. Where am I?"
"You are approximately 800,000 years in the future. Your race is extinct. The data-crypt that housed your data-corpse has sadly lost all power giving birth to you. You are all that's left."
The slab of muscle eyes you. "We need help to reunite the Singular. You do this, I promise many things for eating!"
"And you will gain a healthy share of the profit, of course."
You deliberate in your mind for a moment. You decide to:
A. Accept to help them reunite the Singular, or whatever it is they want.
B. Decline and go on your own. You never signed up for this.
C. Decline and go help those muscly aliens. The strong need to rule, and with your size and strength they will definitely win!
D. Decline and go help the floating brains. They're probably the only ones smart enough who could properly help you.
E. Decline and go help the robots. They obviously know how to run the economy, and money solves everything!