Hitman: Absolution

[Metro]

all you want. I'm not wrong.

 

[Clockwork Knight]

The challenge of Hitman was never in the "stealth". It was in coming up with creative ways to take out your target undetected.

That's...pretty much the definition of stealth.

 

[sea]

That's...pretty much the definition of stealth.

Okay, fair enough. But when I said "stealth" I was referring to typical "duck behind walls, avoid being seen, etc." stealth you see in most games, where the focus is on avoidance and escape - not on deception. Hitman plays a lot less like a traditional stealth game than it does a sandbox puzzle game, as I said.

The one thing I do like about Absolution is that it preserves Hitman's general focus on "soft" failure states that have multiple tools to deal with. If you make mistakes you are penalized, but it's never "game over" for making a single mistake - almost always it's cumulative. Its biggest problems, as I said, are factors of changes to the disguise mechanics and the level design; the way failure states are handled still make it feel close to a traditional Hitman game.

 

[Metro]

It's 'game over' for me since I was going for perfect suit only runs. The number of restarts... oh man... I almost want to strangle a Chicago cop.

 

[sexbad?]

It's 'game over' for me since I was going for perfect suit only runs. The number of restarts... oh man... I almost want to strangle a Chicago cop.

why do you torture yourself like that

 

[DeepOcean]

It's 'game over' for me since I was going for perfect suit only runs. The number of restarts... oh man... I almost want to strangle a Chicago cop.

why do you torture yourself like that

I don't know about Metro but after ghosting Thief, I don't want to play a stealth game in any other way even if means frustration to no end, old habits don't die easily.

 

[DalekFlay]

What I didn't like was how the harder modes actually discouraged creativity by blocking off options. That drug dealer's apartment you used for an easy win on normal mode? Now you can't get to it! Ha! Sucker!

Hitman was all about options. Normal mode is brain-dead easy in this game, while the hardest modes force you down specific paths.

 

[Metro]

It's 'game over' for me since I was going for perfect suit only runs. The number of restarts... oh man... I almost want to strangle a Chicago cop.

why do you torture yourself like that

I can probably quote you the opening lines of dialogue for most of the missions at this point. A few of them I did concede after an hour or so of failure either by just using disguises or... (for shame) switching to normal difficulty.

 

[Cadmus]

THIS IS THE WORST AND MOST INFURIATINGLY SHITTY SEQUEL TO MY FAVOURITE FRANCHISE THAT I HAVE EVER PLAYED IN MY LIFE. FUCK EVERYTHING ABOUT IT. IT'S SHIT AND CRAP AND PISS AND WORTHLESS PIECE OF CUNT DISCHARGE.

Only with this game I have come to understand the true passionate hatred some people have for some sequels.

 

[RK47]

 

[dunno lah]

Glitch or spamming "5"?

 

[RK47]

Learned a new slang for it.
Hurr.
Updated my journal.

 

[Cadmus]

It's 'game over' for me since I was going for perfect suit only runs. The number of restarts... oh man... I almost want to strangle a Chicago cop.

why do you torture yourself like that

I can probably quote you the opening lines of dialogue for most of the missions at this point. A few of them I did concede after an hour or so of failure either by just using disguises or... (for shame) switching to normal difficulty.

Because the game is fucking broken. It's crap. And as a Hitman game it is worse than Holocaust. Ask any Jew who has survived a concentration camp, he will confirm.
Actual quote from a holocaust survivor: "Man when I was in concentration camp, it was bad but when I got back home and just wanted to play a sequel to my favourite game to relieve the stress, I got slapped in my face and cried like a little girl, the game shattered all my dreams and hopes, now the only thing I can do is lie down and die."

PRESS X TO FAKE SURRENDER what the fuck, why is there a Controls menu where I can read what each key does if the stupid fucking game treats me like an imbecile and tells me what to press in every situation?

The limited save system in the previous games was a genius thing to help spike up the difficulty in a fair and reasonable way.
Even the shitty checkpoints in Hitman Codename 47 were better than this.
Despite it not being a focus of any of the games, Hitman actually had a personality that totally clashes with everything in this turd.
Even the interface in the first game was better than this. Also fuck the QTEs. Fuck the story, it's like a fanfiction, hitting every little iconic thing in the previous games and boosting it to eleven.
NOW YOU HAVE A MISSION SOLELY TO RETRIEVE YOUR HITMANNING SUIT (TM).
DIANA BURNWOOD SHOWER SCENE HURR DURR.

 

[Metro]

Calm down, it's flawed but not that bad.

 

[Cadmus]

Calm down, it's flawed but not that bad.

If I'm being reasonable, as a generic dudebro shooter with shit stealth, it's just a normal bad game. Follow the path and prompts, do what the game tells you to and the result is cinematic sequence of murders, like a badly dressed up playstation Splinter Cell.
But as a Hitman sequel, it's incredibly bad. It stomps on all the creativity, wit and the little touches that have made the games so amazing.

It's funny because it really gets my blood boiling to even think about this game, I'm being serious. I can joke about the other shit games but this..this SHIT just breaks me.
I understand Spoony now with his stupid Ultima videos.

I hate that fucking cocksucker Yahtzee or whatshisname, it's such an asshole. Hitman 2 was brilliant. I still remember the amazing ending monologue to this day. I even went and showed it to my girlfriend who couldn't give a shit about Hitman and she was impressed. Me and my friend who sucks at playing PC games used to get drunk and play Hitman 4 and afterwards listen to all the game soundtracks, it's to this day our party music. Just look at that fucking shit music in Hitman Absolution. Jesper Kyd's morning fart sounds better than that. There's just so many things wrong with this game.

 

[Metro]

Well if it's any consolation they recognize it sucked and are 'going back to the roots' for the next installment.

 

[DalekFlay]

It's better than Thief, at least.

 

[Cadmus]

Well if it's any consolation they recognize it sucked and are 'going back to the roots' for the next installment.

Yes, I've read that open letter but I'm heavily unconvinced. About the only thing that I really liked about Absolution is the graphics, if they can actually imbue it with some style, I'd like to see it in a good game.
But I'm worried because the new Hitman lacked subtlety most importantly and it's rare for a game to actually scale back on the retarded shit they are already used to using.

It's better than Thief, at least.

I'm not much of a thief fan, I liked it very much in the old times but I can't judge the new game properly. I just get so pissed off and disinterested upon seeing screenshots with the motherfucking key prompts like in every goddamn modern game ever.
Funnily, I watched that retard TotalBiscuit play it and he was so goddamn bad at the game that I have no idea what's it actually like. How come these fucking monkeys with computers don't know how to play the games they are reviewing?

 

[DalekFlay]

I'm not much of a thief fan, I liked it very much in the old times but I can't judge the new game properly. I just get so pissed off and disinterested upon seeing screenshots with the motherfucking key prompts like in every goddamn modern game ever.

You can turn all of those off, actually.

 

[Cadmus]

I'm not much of a thief fan, I liked it very much in the old times but I can't judge the new game properly. I just get so pissed off and disinterested upon seeing screenshots with the motherfucking key prompts like in every goddamn modern game ever.

You can turn all of those off, actually.

Even the "press X to pick up item" ?
For example in Hitman many things could have been turned off with the purist mode or options but the game was built around them that it felt stupid. It seemed like turning off the quest compass in Oblivion when nobody actually gives you any directions.

 

[DalekFlay]

Even the "press X to pick up item" ?
For example in Hitman many things could have been turned off with the purist mode or options but the game was built around them that it felt stupid. It seemed like turning off the quest compass in Oblivion when nobody actually gives you any directions.

Yes, I was quite annoyed that in Hitman Absolution playing without the cheat stuff on hard mode made the game damn near impossible for a first-time go. Thief (and Deus Ex: HR) aren't like that, you can turn off all the HUD help shit and Thief's cheat mode and the games play just fine.

Thief still sucks though, in my experience, mostly due to poor level design.

 

[Cadmus]

Even the "press X to pick up item" ?
For example in Hitman many things could have been turned off with the purist mode or options but the game was built around them that it felt stupid. It seemed like turning off the quest compass in Oblivion when nobody actually gives you any directions.

Yes, I was quite annoyed that in Hitman Absolution playing without the cheat stuff on hard mode made the game damn near impossible for a first-time go. Thief (and Deus Ex: HR) aren't like that, you can turn off all the HUD help shit and Thief's cheat mode and the games play just fine.

Thief still sucks though, in my experience, mostly due to poor level design.

Strange thing is,Absolution is actually not really easy but in the most stupid way, because the new disguise mechanics are completely broken and unreliable and the "facepalm to avoid getting detected" is the single most retarded thing to be ever put in a Hitman game.

 

[Zewp]

Calm down, it's flawed but not that bad.

Not that bad? Sorry, but I actually agree with Cadmus in this instance. Hitman Absolution was the worst thing that could have happened to the franchise. The only way it could have been worse is if they turned it into an FPS.

It's better than Thief, at least.

I'm actually not so sure. I upgraded my PC and got a Thief code with my new GPU, so I tried it out. I played until chapter 4, I think. The main missions are shit and the gameplay is generally very shit, but there are a few redeeming features, such as the client missions being fun.

In the case of Hitman Absolution, I couldn't find a single redeeming quality.

 

[Multidirectional]

It's not that bad. Some stupid design decisions and too much focus on terrible story but still more interesting to play than most console releases. New Thief, however, is absolutely horrid.

 

[DalekFlay]

I'm actually not so sure. I upgraded my PC and got a Thief code with my new GPU, so I tried it out. I played until chapter 4, I think. The main missions are shit and the gameplay is generally very shit, but there are a few redeeming features, such as the client missions being fun.

In the case of Hitman Absolution, I couldn't find a single redeeming quality.

Thief's poor level design ruins the entire game for me personally. I'm at the gates of mission three and having a real hard time convincing myself to load the game up again. In contrast I thought Hitman Absolution had some very good "Hitman moments" where it played like the classics, and the Splinter Cell rip-off stealth in between those moments isn't bad, it's just not Hitman.