This FF8 LP is totally dead.

spekkio said:

Cassidy said:

I've read most of the comics.
They are better than the rest of the thread IMO.

Click to expand...

Hey, at least Andy didn't die during the tutorial...

Click to expand...

You died during the fucking tutorial?! Jesus christ I gotta read that. You got balls leaving shit like that in though.

LIONHEART

Update 09: Let's ride the fucking train!

Welcome back to Final Fantasy 8, kids. It's finally time to test out our mad skillz in a real mission.



Selphie is the one waking us up here. Yeah, she's the responsible one. Don't forget to pick up the magazine on your desk. It's Weapons Monthly, covering all your weapons upgrading needs and it's also worth quite a lot of money.

Anyway, head out to the front gate and...



Uh oh! Looks like that rascally rascal Zell is late! How will he manage to get here in just one minute?!



Why, by surfing on some... fucking rocketboard or something!



Of course, why on earth he'd even bother doing this in the first place is highly questionable. Something even more questionable however is his navigation!



Where the fuck are you going, you stupid can of vomited up semen!?



You don't have to circle around everyone, Zell!



You're not cool, goddammit!



I kinda like how nobody moves or says anything during all this, though, because that's basically what my reaction would be. Complete, utter silence. Good call, Squaresoft!



Anyway.



T-Boards are prohibited within Garden. Have you forgotten?

There's THAT word again. Although in this case It's just because Zell is a fucking idiot. Also, the T probably stands for Turbo. Or travesty. Maybe transexual. I suppose T can stand for a lot of things.

Oops, sorry! But this is really cool. It may come in handy on a SeeD mission some day.
We'll be the judges of that. I'm gonna have to confiscate it. Look, all of you are members of SeeD, but... nevertheless, you're still students at this Garden.

Uh... wait, how do graduation work again?

Furthermore, because you are SeeDs, you must set an example to all others and abide by the Garden's rules. Understood!?



Fuck yeah, let's hear it!

You are to go to Timber. There you will be supporting a resistance faction. That is your mission. A member of the faction will contact you at Timber Station.
This person will talk to you and say, “the forests of Timber sure have changed.” At this time you must reply, “but the owls are still around.” That is the password.

Wow, it's like the game went all John le Carré on us!

Just follow the faction's orders.
Uh, just us three?
Correct. We have agreed to do this mission for very little money. Normally, we would never accept such requests, but...

Hell yeah, Headmaster Cid does what Headmaster Cid wants, bitches!

Enough talk about that...

FOR FUCK'S SAKE, CID! Be a goddamn man for once!

Squall, you're the squad leader. Use your best judgement based on the situation. Zell and Selphie, you are to support Squall and give your all to carry out the faction's plans.

Awesome. Alright, here are my orders: stay the fuck at home and make me a sandwich for when I come back.

Oh, and here's a magic lamp. There's a devil living in it.
Cool. I'll tame the shit out of it.

And tamed the shit out of it he did.

A word if I may. Diablos is basically a piece of shit if you fight him on low levels. However, since I made the decision to gimp myself by going all level 100... well, it's not worth showing my strategy of attack, heal, attack, revive, heal, attack. It's essential that you have a whole bunch of healing items/magic coming into this fight. Not only is it a very difficult battle, it also takes forever. That's essentially the main problem with leveling up: enemies just take longer to kill. Anyway, I'm sure nobody here's so stupid they're going to do a level 100 run (or play the game at all, hurr hurr). Whatever, Diablos is one of the most useful GFs in the game. Learn the no encounter abilities as soon as possible.

ALRIGHT! Two more things before we can leave this place: the first is to get Seifer's card. Cid has it, but we have to go up to his office to challenge him. No screenshot.

The second thing is actually a pretty lengthy sidequest that people have apparently dubbed “Zell's Love Quest” or something like that. It takes place at the library! Let's go!


ZELL'S LOVE QUEST!!



Meet Library Girl with a Pigtail. Apparently she thinks Zell is hot stuff.





And that's the first part of Zell's Love Quest!

FUN FACT: If you log on to the school database you can check up on 'Good-bye Pururun' and find out that it is in the possession of Raijin. Cool stuff. Yup. Sure is.


Alright. Less bullshit, more resistance faction assisting.



Guess what we're going to do while we're passing through Balamb? Start the Card Queen sidequest!



It's going to be awesome. Our first order of business is to lose the Minimog card to her and make sure she travels to Dollet and not Galbadia!



With this done we can do a bunch of neat shit when we revisit Dollet.

Alright, let's board the motherfucking train!



Hey, buddy, we're mercenaries on our way to thwart evil and stuff. I don't think we need to pay.



Are you serious? What the fucking fuck! What kind of fucking low budget bullshit is this?!

Man, this train better be awesome!



Oh blow me.



IT'S THE INSIDE OF A TRAIN!!



I left this in just because I love you all so much.

Let's talk to Selphie.



She's singing a song about trains. I'm almost 100% certain that it was written by Barret Wallace. Here are the lyrics:

Train, train take us away
Take us away far away
To the future we will go

Short but sweet. Selphie says she'll join us later so let's check up on Zell and see what all the damn hullaballoo's about.



...

Zell Dincht everybody. A couch makes him excited.

...I'm glad you're so excited.
They even have magazines here.

They have magazines.

Best. Train. Ever!

[Received Pet Pals Vol. 1]

Wait a goddamn minute. Pet Pals? Yeah, we're not going to take THAT along. Leave it, Zell.



Oh, don't worry, it balances out quite nicely since we paid 3000 gil for this.

Squall, y'know anything about Timber?
Not too much.
Thought so. Well, let me fill you in. Timber used to be a country surrounded by deep forests.
Which explains why it's called Timber. Thank you.
I wasn't done. 18 years ago, Galbadia invaded.
And they cut down all the trees. Thank you.
There's more. Timber fell quite easily to Galbadia.
Alright, thank you. Great joke, too.
Not finished yet. Timber is under Galbadian occupation. It's said there's a whole bunch of resistance factions, big and small.
Alright.
Yup.
.......and?
That's it.
You're done?
All done!
.........................right.
No prob!

I HATE YOU ZELL I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I FUCKING HATE YOU



Oh hey Selphie.



You should get some rest if you're tired.
I'm really sleepy...
You ok?
Hey...? Huh? What the...!? Something's wrong with me too. I... feel... sleepy...



It seems like Zell and Selphie feel victim to some sort of death gas! I don't think it's anything to worry about. Right, Squall?



Squall?



Oh...




..fuck!



The hell's going on?! What--



Whoa...


To be continued.

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

I guess you'll awaken after someone rings a bell, and have to fight the first Waltz then... oh wait.

Laguna the retard incoming

SCO said:

Laguna the retard incoming

Click to expand...

Only one with a fucking assault rifle. Not so retarded.

It's a Final Fantasy game; swords > guns. Therefore, the gun is just additional support for him being retarded.

(Ward's method of attacking truly is retarded, though.)

Godfucking shit the convulsed flashback sequences

laugh!

Codexers show their stuff, eh.

Boys, girls, all you people in-between, my computer just fucking died and decided to take everything stored on it and blow its fucking nose with it. Luckily, going outside and buying a new computer was painless enough but oh my god I have to start FF8 from the beginning again! Godfuckingdammit!

Consider this thread upgraded, from "slightly abandoned" to "definitely put on hold"



I'm too majestic for this shit...

Fat Dragon said:

Click to expand...

indeed.

Andyman this was teh bestes LP of teh bestes game evar! Shame on the Technogods!

Horses fail at backups?

spekkio said:

Horses fail at backups?

Click to expand...

Horses don't think about backing up their cool internet projects.

Andyman Messiah said:

Boys, girls, all you people in-between, my computer just fucking died and decided to take everything stored on it and blow its fucking nose with it. Luckily, going outside and buying a new computer was painless enough but oh my god I have to start FF8 from the beginning again! Godfuckingdammit!

Consider this thread upgraded, from "slightly abandoned" to "definitely put on hold"



I'm too majestic for this shit...

Click to expand...

Try a recovery tools if you can remove the drive and mount it.

SCO said:

Try a recovery tools if you can remove the drive and mount it.

Click to expand...

Let's just say that if there actually was a drive to remove, this is what I would've done.

Eh, no worries, lads. I'll have your favorite LP ever up and running again in no time.

Andyman Messiah said:

Radisshu said:

I hate how all the characters are 15-18. Makes me feel old. Fuckers. I wanna fuck them so bad. Uh, fuck them up I mean.

Click to expand...

Squall, Zell, Selphie, Irvine and Rinoa are all seventeen. Seifer and Quistis are eighteen.

That's another reason why I don't like Quistis, although I realize it's not her fault. What kind of a mad man would put a seventeen year old in a teaching position? I don't care how good your potential is, you're seventeen! Who the fuck thinks that's a good idea?!

Click to expand...

Maybe not for a military training school (which shouldn't even accept students at their age), but for a school in the real world I would much rather have a exceptionally talented student with enthusiasm (of which I was one in some subjects) then brain dead teachers who don't give a shit because they realize they are stuck in a shitty job and are pretty much immune to being fired so long as they don't fuck their kids.

I know how it sucks, having the luck of ending with 5 Civilization III Autosaves and a Save File simultaneously corrupted. Or maybe not because Civ III is a fun game. But anyway, good luck with this, and if you are sick of it, don't worry, just abandon it. It's not like anyone will take it seriously and personally and feel butthurt because the favorite LP they've been browsing suddenly was cancelled.

Or is it likely?

Overweight Manatee said:

Maybe not for a military training school (which shouldn't even accept students at their age), but for a school in the real world I would much rather have a exceptionally talented student with enthusiasm (of which I was one in some subjects) then brain dead teachers who don't give a shit because they realize they are stuck in a shitty job and are pretty much immune to being fired so long as they don't fuck their kids.

Click to expand...

I don't want a seventeen year old to tell me shit. I don't care how much enthusiasm and knowledge they might have, they're seventeen years old and their basic skills generally include being know nothing assholes who haven't seen or done anything besides opening up a book. Experience is what I'm talking about, and that goes for military training just as well as for geography and english, and social studies.

Plus, I've reached some sort of spiritual age where anyone younger than me automatically pisses me off. I made a thread about it in General Discussion.

Cassidy said:

I know how it sucks, having the luck of ending with 5 Civilization III Autosaves and a Save File simultaneously corrupted. Or maybe not because Civ III is a fun game. But anyway, good luck with this, and if you are sick of it, don't worry, just abandon it. It's not like anyone will take it seriously and personally and feel butthurt because the favorite LP they've been browsing suddenly was cancelled.

Or is it likely?

Click to expand...

Well, just to be safe I've had my army of trusty lithuanians surround my house. But I'm not going to abandon the thread. I will trainwreck FF8 all the way to the end...



...but it'll probably take twice as long as FF7.

The longer it takes. The funnier it is. At least for us.


btw.

Should I read your FF7 LP or play it first?

Der_Unbekannte said:

Should I read your FF7 LP or play it first?

Click to expand...

I really cannot make that decision for you. Both will hurt you.

Andyman Messiah said:

Der_Unbekannte said:

Should I read your FF7 LP or play it first?

Click to expand...

I really cannot make that decision for you. Both will hurt you.

Click to expand...

But reading the LP will hurt you less.

I almost forgot about this.

Here's to hoping we get MOAR soon.