Review New Zealand loves Oblivion

[Vault Dweller]

Tags: Bethesda Softworks; Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

<a href=http://www.varsity.co.nz>Varsity</a>, a New Zealand site, has posted an overly enthusiastic drug-induced <a href=http://www.varsity.co.nz/games/articles.asp?id=5502>Oblivion review</a>.
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<blockquote>The best thing is the scope of what you can do and what kind of character you can be. There are three main streams of guild you can join. Fighter/Mage/Thief. There are many factions and groups that you could join which can advance your character in any number of dimensions. The best thing is that YOU choose. Do I want to be good, evil, or indifferent? Help the poor? Kill the poor? Steal from the poor? Be the poor? The variations are endless. Personally, I have played with a Nord Warrior and a Breton Mage. Both very different, but I could have always gone the way of a battlemage to get the best of both worlds. This gives the game unparallelled longevity for a story-only game as opposed to other Xbox Live enabled titles. <b>Everything you do, even the main story, will change depending on your character – i.e. HOW you do it.</b> You could easily have this game in your collection for years and never play all the character possibilities.
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Even with this taken into consideration, I have to give the game a kick arse rating. It’s basically a game I can keep going back to as long as I have this console. There will be many characters I would like to test out after this one (Thieves etc) and I expect there is no way that my current character will manage to do all the side plots as well.
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RPG people, this is a must buy. Everyone else, check it out. It’s well worth it.</blockquote><a href=http://teens.drugabuse.gov/mom/mom_hal1.asp>Click here</a>, if you want to have a similar experience, while playing Oblivion.
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[NoisyKillerHPB]

I love when they flat out lie about the game

 

[Hazelnut]

Did they get the same game?

 

[Micmu]

Is he for real? :shock:
That's comedy gold.

...as long as I have this console...

Indeed.

BTW: Patrick Stewart and Sean Bean lend their voices to the game, even that old Wonder woman chick. Who would have thought games would get to the point that celebrities would be the voices, instead of the nobodies of yesteryear.

Is he eleven?

 

[Twinfalls]

Shagnak should stop molesting sheep in his native land and start abducting children with internet access instead

 

[Major_Blackhart]

Is anyone surprised? New Zealand children are amongst the easiest to trick into having sex. The use of candy and a car work almost every time for me.

 

[Top Hat]

Tips Top Hat
Greetings all. Excuse me for the intrusion.

I certainly hope this informs you enough about the (very) average New Zealander and that you stay away from this country.

Stay Away!

This country is analogous to both a bimbo and a rebellious teenager. It's easy on the eye, but the vast majority of the population has the same level of intelligence as a common garden discarded toilet seat. It acts as if its opinions actually affected the world, but nobody ever listens to it.

That's what you get when you have the national past-time involve trying to brain yourself against other human beings. Alongside the aforementioned child abuse and bestiality.

Exit.

 

[Goliath]

The only things I have ever heard about New Zealand are that it is green and that it is full of sheep. I can kinda understand that if all you do every day is watching sheep consuming and digesting tons of grass .. Oblivion seems.. almost interesting.. almost.

 

[Shagnak]

Hey, it's a NZ university-student website. Well done.

Aren't you trawling just a little too hard now...?
(Probably right about the "drug-induced" part, if my varsity days are anything to go by)

EDIT:
Hey let's talk more about boring NZ

Hey there StudentCard peeps

Hope your year is treatin' ya well so far!

As usual we have heaps to cover so we'll get straight into it... if you're in Auckland or Hamilton at the mo there are a couple of new deals for ya to check out, if you're anywhere else you'll probly want to skip down to the "What's wrong with New Plymouth" section and comp below.

Hmmm...what is wrong with New PLymouth?
Hamilton is way more boring, as Stalin can confirm.
Where is that fucking Stalin Brando?

 

[Shagnak]

BTW: Patrick Stewart and Sean Bean lend their voices to the game, even that old Wonder woman chick. Who would have thought games would get to the point that celebrities would be the voices, instead of the nobodies of yesteryear.

Is he eleven?

Nope, he's a student. Which means the body of a young adult, mind of an eleven year old.

The shit on that site is full of off-hand comments and dumbisms.

 

[HotSnack]

Where is that fucking Stalin Brando?

KC tried to choke him in a fit of jealous rage, though Stalin died from a broken heart.

 

[Abernathy]

Hey, NZ is a young country, OK? We haven't evolved braincells yet - the best we've done is Shagnak and a lot of sheep so far.

Just don't expect too much, as they say on the Oblibbion Forums. Where the fuck did Stalin go anyway?

 

[Nutcracker]

He's one of the finest minds this nation has produced

 

[Levski 1912]

Choked on shemale cock, perhaps?

 

[Major_Blackhart]

No, you don't die from that. All you have to do is pull back a bit and you can breathe again.

 

[Stella Brando]

Where is that fucking Stalin Brando?

You called?

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

mancy

 

[oscar]

I have fond memories of one of my friends going "Hey you like these rpg games want to play some Oblivion?". Que rage.