Nevill
Arcane
- Joined
- Jun 6, 2009
- Messages
- 11,211
So many CYOAs. So many brillian ideas. So little time to read them all.
However, I have found a quest that I simply can't not share.
Your name is Sakura Kokoro. Yes, really. And your goal in life is not to become an anime character. Which is made all the harder by the fact that the Universe gets very creative in trying to turn you into one. Mysterious tranfer students arrive to your school weekly, strange creatures offer you contracts on suspiciously generous terms, and sometimes you find mechas parked around without any security protocols to prevent theft. It is as if there is some grand conspiracy centering around you!
But you will not be deterred. You will have your normal and boring life, the Universe be damned! Hopefully, it loses interest in you once you reach your 16th birthday. They say the older the character, the less anime protagonist potential they have...
It is one quest where you have to actively struggle to avoid plot development and make sure that nothing out of the ordinary happens... or that at least it doesn't have any far reaching consequences. I find the idea wonderfully novel.
No Matter What Happens, I Still Won't Become An Anime Character, For Real This Time
It was re-launched due to many problems with the original quest, and nearly died for 4 months, but it seems to have been resurrected recently, which is how it came to my attention. It even has a dedicated TV Tropes page!
Complete with hat-thin disguise!
Snippets from DISCUSS:
When the hat is suspected to be Shulgi, you know this is something else!
However, I have found a quest that I simply can't not share.
Your name is Sakura Kokoro. Yes, really. And your goal in life is not to become an anime character. Which is made all the harder by the fact that the Universe gets very creative in trying to turn you into one. Mysterious tranfer students arrive to your school weekly, strange creatures offer you contracts on suspiciously generous terms, and sometimes you find mechas parked around without any security protocols to prevent theft. It is as if there is some grand conspiracy centering around you!
But you will not be deterred. You will have your normal and boring life, the Universe be damned! Hopefully, it loses interest in you once you reach your 16th birthday. They say the older the character, the less anime protagonist potential they have...
I was born Sakura Kokoro on the 25th of December, 1998, with pink hair. The universe has been after me ever since.
When I was six, my memory still developing, my mother left us in tears. She said it would further my character development. My father offered to hire some abusive grandparents, but I declined.
The childhood friends I made when I was 10 all mysteriously moved away. One I believe went to France.
When I was 13, a sword threw itself up out of a lake. I handed it in to Lost and Found.
I am now 15. I have thus far avoided three claims of secret legacies, two mysterious amulets that fell out of the sky, four foreign princes seeking my hand in marriage and 17 small, sentient furry animals that are capable of human communication. I have, thus far, succeeded in preserving my ordinary life.
In ten weeks, I will be turning 16. For the defence of my ordinary life, I must be ready.
When I was six, my memory still developing, my mother left us in tears. She said it would further my character development. My father offered to hire some abusive grandparents, but I declined.
The childhood friends I made when I was 10 all mysteriously moved away. One I believe went to France.
When I was 13, a sword threw itself up out of a lake. I handed it in to Lost and Found.
I am now 15. I have thus far avoided three claims of secret legacies, two mysterious amulets that fell out of the sky, four foreign princes seeking my hand in marriage and 17 small, sentient furry animals that are capable of human communication. I have, thus far, succeeded in preserving my ordinary life.
In ten weeks, I will be turning 16. For the defence of my ordinary life, I must be ready.
It is one quest where you have to actively struggle to avoid plot development and make sure that nothing out of the ordinary happens... or that at least it doesn't have any far reaching consequences. I find the idea wonderfully novel.
No Matter What Happens, I Still Won't Become An Anime Character, For Real This Time
It was re-launched due to many problems with the original quest, and nearly died for 4 months, but it seems to have been resurrected recently, which is how it came to my attention. It even has a dedicated TV Tropes page!
I examine the mecha critically from the cover of a convenient hedge, trying to ignore the inconvenient woodland creatures it has sprouted in its defence attempting psychological warfare with an acapella birdsong rendition of La Marseillaise ten centimetres from my ear.
It's a very standard JSSDF Mecha all told, one of their 'hero' types painted in white-and-blue, with golden trims around a blocky head and a bulky armoured chest currently left wide open per standard security protocol (what if there was a threat like a rogue stolen mecha that the pilot needed to respond to very quickly?). A two-seater, with seating sized either for teenages or particularly unfortunate short people. I already know where this is going. It's big, it's obvious and it's even parked such that the sun cresting over the horizon alights the back of its head in a golden halo. Stardom has never really done the sun any good; it's just turned it to melodrama and playing coy with clouds.
I peer across the hedge carefully, swatting aside a blue songbird trying to screech about freedom into my ear. The street is empty. No pilot, no guards, no cameras. Obviously if I were actually to climb into it it would count me as immediately recruited into the JSSDF as per standard policy – which is why I'm not going to do that – it does look I can just walk straight past it into school...
...I walk right past it and straight into school, studiously ignoring the very obvious green flash of it's optical sensors. Sigh. It tries to flash them again when it thinks I haven't noticed and I surreptitiously throw the last belligerent hamster still desperately trying to rally as it waves a leaf stabbed through a stick for a battle-flag and valiantly nibbles my shirt cuff. Vive la Gorsebushes; maybe it can pilot it instead.
Despite the events of last week, the school grounds are impressively intact, with only the occasional tasteful crater and upturned Ford Model T – only allowed to smoulder impressively so as not to risk fire safety violations – left behind by the reconstruction crews that inevitably swarm here during the weekends when no-one's watching. They haven't even left caterpillar tracks in the grass this time; my compliments to the foreman.
I wander through pristine halls, with pristine walls and pristine doors. It's as if the whole place is brand new... because it is. Even the layout has remained the same; I find the right classroom without any difficulties at all.
...I stop, and listen against the crack of the half-opened bulkhead door. No sounds of introductions yet. Can't glimpse anyone new. Push it open a squeaking crack more. Still no-one new. Push it open fully...
I jam the hat over my head quickly and start counting. Maths.
No new faces, but there's one more seat than there needs to be. Rats. I take quick stock; my customary seat is still free, as is the one next to it... and the one directly in front of it. Every other is taken. The Class Representative sits at the front, watching. Rats rats rats...
I'm still counting. There's a hat on my head after all.
Okay Sakura, time to think. If a classroom has zero teachers and twenty students, but twenty-one seats, how many apples do Jack and Jill go up the hill to- wait, no-
A hand claps my shoulder.
I shriek, kick out, and abruptly the world turns sideways as I meet the floor with a hard slap and a tangle of limbs. My hat flies away, to freedom or wherever it is hats go.
“-Ow.” Kumiko groans, rolling onto her back and resetting her eyepatch. “Geez.” Blinks at me. “Wait, Sakura?”
...42 seconds; I stop counting. Oh well, the anonymity was nice while it lasted.
I glare. Kumiko puts her hands up in surrender, sheepishly.
“S-Sorry, you were blocking the door, didn't realise...”
“Ahem.”
A soft voice clears its throat, and we both look up, then turn slightly cross-eyed. I'm the one to blink away first, the face already sliding from my memory. Looks like the Faculty had to pull in the reserve Teachers...
Generic-Sensei coughs again. “Ahem.”
I stumble, pulling Kumiko upright and bowing politely. “Sorry, we'll be on our way.”
I make for the door, only for Kumiko to stop me. “-Wait!” Stuffs something fluffy in my hands. “You forgot your hat!”
...I blink it dumbly, turning it over. I've never had one come back before, what is this strange and novel experience...
“Ahem.”
“Right, sorry! We'll just be-”
Someone in a white uniform is standing behind them. There's a glimpse of blue hair and holographic HUD menus.
“Sensei?” A boy-ish voice politely inquires. “Is there a-”
I throw Kumiko through the doorway and slam it behind me. The Class Representative warbles in disapproval, but there isn't time-
[ ] Jump out the window.
- [ ] Run away and hide in the mecha. They'll never look for you there.
[ ] Hide!
- [ ] Under your desk.
- [ ] In the ceiling.
- [ ] Behind Kumiko.
- [ ] Behind the Class Representative.
- [ ] Behind the Mecha Student.
[ ] Perform emergency seat reshuffling procedures.
[ ] Ambush them with the cleaning bucket and duct tape. See how they like it.
[ ] Pepper Spray (20 uses remain)
[ ] “Kumiko! Kneecaps!”
[ ] Ignorance Is Power! Chat with someone else so you miss the Mecha Student's intro.
[ ] Sit down, stay calm and focus on your school work.
It's a very standard JSSDF Mecha all told, one of their 'hero' types painted in white-and-blue, with golden trims around a blocky head and a bulky armoured chest currently left wide open per standard security protocol (what if there was a threat like a rogue stolen mecha that the pilot needed to respond to very quickly?). A two-seater, with seating sized either for teenages or particularly unfortunate short people. I already know where this is going. It's big, it's obvious and it's even parked such that the sun cresting over the horizon alights the back of its head in a golden halo. Stardom has never really done the sun any good; it's just turned it to melodrama and playing coy with clouds.
I peer across the hedge carefully, swatting aside a blue songbird trying to screech about freedom into my ear. The street is empty. No pilot, no guards, no cameras. Obviously if I were actually to climb into it it would count me as immediately recruited into the JSSDF as per standard policy – which is why I'm not going to do that – it does look I can just walk straight past it into school...
...I walk right past it and straight into school, studiously ignoring the very obvious green flash of it's optical sensors. Sigh. It tries to flash them again when it thinks I haven't noticed and I surreptitiously throw the last belligerent hamster still desperately trying to rally as it waves a leaf stabbed through a stick for a battle-flag and valiantly nibbles my shirt cuff. Vive la Gorsebushes; maybe it can pilot it instead.
Despite the events of last week, the school grounds are impressively intact, with only the occasional tasteful crater and upturned Ford Model T – only allowed to smoulder impressively so as not to risk fire safety violations – left behind by the reconstruction crews that inevitably swarm here during the weekends when no-one's watching. They haven't even left caterpillar tracks in the grass this time; my compliments to the foreman.
I wander through pristine halls, with pristine walls and pristine doors. It's as if the whole place is brand new... because it is. Even the layout has remained the same; I find the right classroom without any difficulties at all.
...I stop, and listen against the crack of the half-opened bulkhead door. No sounds of introductions yet. Can't glimpse anyone new. Push it open a squeaking crack more. Still no-one new. Push it open fully...
I jam the hat over my head quickly and start counting. Maths.
No new faces, but there's one more seat than there needs to be. Rats. I take quick stock; my customary seat is still free, as is the one next to it... and the one directly in front of it. Every other is taken. The Class Representative sits at the front, watching. Rats rats rats...
I'm still counting. There's a hat on my head after all.
Okay Sakura, time to think. If a classroom has zero teachers and twenty students, but twenty-one seats, how many apples do Jack and Jill go up the hill to- wait, no-
A hand claps my shoulder.
I shriek, kick out, and abruptly the world turns sideways as I meet the floor with a hard slap and a tangle of limbs. My hat flies away, to freedom or wherever it is hats go.
“-Ow.” Kumiko groans, rolling onto her back and resetting her eyepatch. “Geez.” Blinks at me. “Wait, Sakura?”
...42 seconds; I stop counting. Oh well, the anonymity was nice while it lasted.
I glare. Kumiko puts her hands up in surrender, sheepishly.
“S-Sorry, you were blocking the door, didn't realise...”
“Ahem.”
A soft voice clears its throat, and we both look up, then turn slightly cross-eyed. I'm the one to blink away first, the face already sliding from my memory. Looks like the Faculty had to pull in the reserve Teachers...
Generic-Sensei coughs again. “Ahem.”
I stumble, pulling Kumiko upright and bowing politely. “Sorry, we'll be on our way.”
I make for the door, only for Kumiko to stop me. “-Wait!” Stuffs something fluffy in my hands. “You forgot your hat!”
...I blink it dumbly, turning it over. I've never had one come back before, what is this strange and novel experience...
“Ahem.”
“Right, sorry! We'll just be-”
Someone in a white uniform is standing behind them. There's a glimpse of blue hair and holographic HUD menus.
“Sensei?” A boy-ish voice politely inquires. “Is there a-”
I throw Kumiko through the doorway and slam it behind me. The Class Representative warbles in disapproval, but there isn't time-
[ ] Jump out the window.
- [ ] Run away and hide in the mecha. They'll never look for you there.
[ ] Hide!
- [ ] Under your desk.
- [ ] In the ceiling.
- [ ] Behind Kumiko.
- [ ] Behind the Class Representative.
- [ ] Behind the Mecha Student.
[ ] Perform emergency seat reshuffling procedures.
[ ] Ambush them with the cleaning bucket and duct tape. See how they like it.
[ ] Pepper Spray (20 uses remain)
[ ] “Kumiko! Kneecaps!”
[ ] Ignorance Is Power! Chat with someone else so you miss the Mecha Student's intro.
[ ] Sit down, stay calm and focus on your school work.
Snippets from DISCUSS:
(NMWHISWBAAC: the only Quest where you can have an option for 'Nothing' on 'What did you learn from all this' and people will actually vote for it)
- You know what has never happened in any anime ever? The main character telling someone to kneecap a new student on sight. And it would basically guarantee that the new student wouldn't be able to go recruiting.
- Not even that uncommon either. It sets us up for a typical delinquent storyline. We're the guardian of the school, and Kimiko is our henchwoman. The new transfer student that we try to put in his place, only for him to be too strong and cool for it. Thus first Kimiko and then we ourslef fall in love with him.
We then team up and use his mecha with our delinquent skills (ie hurting people) to save the world.
Typical anime plot.
By the same token, the fact that the hat came back makes me suspicious of it. Before it was a way to hide for a few seconds; now it smells more to me like a plot hook, a way to keep Sakura's hair hidden until it suddenly becomes "narratively interesting" to uncover it at a dramatic moment.
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