Let's Play Pokemon Crystal!

[Andyman Messiah]

Great dialogue. This thread is still bookmarked, despite the lack of child rape.

 

[Carrie Underwood]

So you're no longer Locue? Name switching is for losers.

Aw, what about fire weasel?

He's not posh.

Plus water pokemon > > > > > > other pokemon

 

[Andyman Messiah]

My heart is filled with the blackest of shame.

 

[FrancoTAU]

Can we at least put a "formerly known as Locue"?

I remain skeptical of a pedo less LP, but I chuckled at the Back to the Future bit.

 

[Carrie Underwood]

I'm just kidding. Name changers are the coolest and sexiest people with the best taste in RPGs.
Also, you should put "burning bridges" under interests in your profile. It's not required, but it's tradition.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Can we at least put a "formerly known as Locue"?

Done.

Carrie: Why would you ever want to burn a bridge? That just seems so very mean. I mean, what did the bridge ever do to you? It gets stepped on daily and now it gets threatened with arson? I don't understand what kind of world we live in where things like that can happen.

 

[Sovy Kurosei]

Professor Oak's telepathy is disturbing when he invades the dreams of a prepubescent children and ask for their gender and name.

 

[Texas Red]

Chefe, you're one of the brightest minds of the Codex and an initiator of the Codex Golden Age, but please... There are many other, real games(not necessary RPGs) that you could have made a (lulzy) thread about.

 

[BethesdaLove]

wtf happened, where did the funny pictchurz go?!!!

 

[Archaeon]

moar pls?

 

[Carrie Underwood]

Welcome back to the world of Pokemons!

Holy day and night cycle, batman!

Last time, our hero Chief obtained his first pokemons, a totodile, and set out on his arduous adventure.

Hello? Who's there?

He is about to walk into the tall grass and battle his first wild pokemons!

Hello? Is anyone out there?

This will be his first test of wits against wild mother nature and her fierce inhabitants.

Hey! Who's talking?

It's me, Professor Oak.

Who?

From before.

Show yourself!

It is not possible for you to see me at this time.

Why not? Are you some kind of ghost?

No, I'm the narrator.

I don't need a narrator.

Your adventure was lacking. You can't just abruptly transition from one scene to another in a let's play story. It's very jarring.

Let's play? What are you talking about?

Hey! It looks like you're standing in some tall grass!

So?

Pokemons can approach you in tall grass, mountains, and seas. There's one now.

You've got to be kidding me.

Rawr! Rawr!

This is a ratatta, a normal type pokemon. They are not very difficult.

Squeak!

So what's the point in fighting them?

Every time you defeat a pokemons, the participating pokemons gain experience points towards levelling up.

Alright then. Twinfalls! Scratch him until he's finished!

Hold on there, Chief. Not so fast.

What?

Each pokemons only gets one attack per turn. It's turn based gameplay.

I've got 10 speed. I'm sure I have more turns than this dude.

That doesn't matter. Each pokemons only gets one.

Several battles later...

Alright! Level up!

Better stats!

New move!

This is the basis of the pokemons system that will support the rest of your adventure. Now, on towards Cherry Grove City.

Hey, I never told my mom I was leaving.

We don't have time for sentimentals! There are pokemons to catch!

Well then, I guess it's off to Cherry Grove.

That's my line. Well then, our hero is off to Cherry Grove.

Until next time.

Hey! Until next...

Unt...

Til nex...

...

...

Until nex...!

ext time....! Ha!

 

[Inziladun]

Not sure which game it was from, but I could of sworn some of the faster pokemon could attack twice per turn.

 

[Suchy]

You actually played it?
[/too lazy to look for a facepalm]

 

[Inziladun]

You haven't? Get off your high horse fucktard, Pokemon rocks.

 

[Carrie Underwood]

You only get one "move" per turn. There are some attacks that multi-hit though, IIRC.

 

[Vault Dweller]

No Mudcrab pokemon? EPIC FAIL!

 

[Gold]

Yeah there are a number of moves that are 2-5 hits, with a low attack power per hit.

 

[Inziladun]

No Mudcrab pokemon? EPIC FAIL!

 

[Carrie Underwood]

Hello pokefans!

Who are you talking to?

It's time for the first installment of "Meet our party!"

What?

In this segment, we look over our current pokemons.

I only have one.

The first pokemons in Chief's arsenal is... totodile.

I know that.

According to the pokedex, it's a rough critter that chops at any moving object it sees.

The what?

Turning your back on a totodile is NOT recommended! Ho ho! We'll have to keep that in mind!

What's going on here?

Being a water type pokemons, totodile is strong against fire, ground, and rock, but weak against water, grass, and dragon.

Dragon?

That concludes this episode of "Meet the Pokemons!"

I thought it was "meet our party".

We'll see you next time!

 

[Carrie Underwood]

My god, this game is horrible.

 

[sportforredneck]

My god, this game is horrible.

Man through it, we need entertainment.

 

[Carrie Underwood]

I think I'll do FireRed then.

Someone retardo this.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Keep going, you pussy!

 

[Carrie Underwood]

I can't keep up with dem pokermans.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Then do a thread about pokermoms instead. Moms who play poker. It'll be hot! Come on, let's do it!