We’re constantly talking about Dungeons and Dragons (all editions), Pathfinder, Call of Cthulhu, Shadowrun, GURPS and other popular and well-made roleplaying games. But there are literally hundreds of others out there. And some of them are so wild that you have to wonder whether or not the authors were high when they wrote it. So here is a short list of some of the wilder RPGs I know, that actually range from the mediocre to the good. I won’t be listing bad RPGS, like F.A.T.A.L. and its rules for genital size, rectal circumferences and unconsensual fornication or Synnibarr with its flying bears with lazor beam eyes.
No, these are wild RPGs you might actually enjoy playing.
1.) 1. Kobolds Ate My Baby
The good folks at Ninth Level Publishing created this beer in pretzels game where you play one of a party of kobolds
seeking to find a human baby in order to feed your chief, King Torg. From the game’s own words description:
“It's not your fault that Kobolds are gourmets. It's not you fault that King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) is hungry. It's not your fault that the tastiest thing a KObold has ever eaten is sweet baby! And it's defineatly, not your fault that Kobolds are the most incompetent, reckless, and accident prone race to ever crawl out of a cave. But it is your problem...
King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) needs you - yes, you - to go out to the nearby human town and bring back the freshest, tastiest, plumpest human babies you can find - or, the King will be eating you (and Kobold's pretty darn tasty.)”
The humor is pretty dark. You’re out baby hunting against a sleepy village of commoners. Your kobold character is pretty useless, but luckily you’re up against some equally useless human peasants with makeshift weapons. Even if the kobolds succeed the life expectancy of their entire tribe is going to be short, since you just know a nearby group of adventurers would be called in to genocide the lot of them.
2. Panty Explosion
This game is for all of you that always wanted to play Japanese school girl fighting demons. The authors claim that they picked the title to poke fun at the horrible way Japanese titles get converted into English and vice versa. This is not Urotsukidoji, the hentai tentacle RPG. It’s actually a horror RPG dealing with girls that have psychic powers. Because the girls still have to attend high school, their interactions with their classmates and stress at school affects their mental state, leaving them stronger or weaker when the demons finally move to attack from the spirit realm. The game is fairly complex, making the players spend as much time worrying about their characters social interactions and mental state as they do their combat statistics. It also includes character attributes important in Japanese culture, such as a spiritual background based on one of the five Japanese elements and the character’s blood type. It has a pretty devoted fanbase.
3. Grimm RPG and Little Fears RPG
Both of these games have done pretty well, so I am not going to choose between which is better. Both cover the idea of little kids having to battle monsters that aren’t so imaginary. As you can imagine, they are both horror RPGs with Little Fears dealing with more modern monsters while Grimm delves into the twisted Grimm Fairy Tales. I’ve actually heard of people playing this game with their children, but being a lot lighter on the horror elements and allowing little Johnny to feel like he could beat up that boogie man he keeps imagining is in the closet.
4. Paranoia RPG
God, I love me some Paranoia. The above cover is from the version I grabbed in the early 90s. This is an RPG that encourages players to kill off one another in hilarious ways, and for the GM to kill them off at his whim. It’s ok, though, since they all have clones and immediately rejoin after each death. Until they run out that is. The RPG takes place in an underground fallout shelter after World War 3 wiped out mankind on the surface of the planet. Unfortunately the computer running the underground city was damaged during the attacks and was only able to rebuild its behavioral core from anti-Communist propaganda from the 1950s. The computer is constantly looking to eliminate communists, and runs a police-state dystopian society. Think Fallout with even more zany humor. I can’t help but think that the people who designed Portal also were familiar with this game. Not many people know about it today.
“SERVE THE COMPUTER. THE COMPUTER IS YOUR FRIEND! The Computer wants you to be happy. If you are not happy, you may be used as reactor shielding. The Computer is crazy. The Computer is happy. The Computer will help you become happy. This will drive you crazy. Being a citizen of Alpha Complex is fun. The Computer says so, and The Computer is your friend. Rooting out traitors will make you happy. The Computer tells you so. Can you doubt The Computer? Being a Troubleshooter is fun. The Computer tells you so. Of course the Computer is right. Troubleshooters get shot at, stabbed, incinerated, stapled, mangled, poisoned, blown to bits, and occasionally accidentally executed. This is so much fun that many Troubleshooters go crazy. You will be working with many Troubleshooters. All of them carry lasers. Aren’t you glad you have a laser? Won’t this be fun? There are many traitors in Alpha Complex. There are many happy citizens m Alpha Complex. Most of the happy citizens are crazy. It is hard to say which is more dangerous traitors or happy citizens.”
5. Mouse Guard
No, these are wild RPGs you might actually enjoy playing.
1.) 1. Kobolds Ate My Baby
The good folks at Ninth Level Publishing created this beer in pretzels game where you play one of a party of kobolds
seeking to find a human baby in order to feed your chief, King Torg. From the game’s own words description:
“It's not your fault that Kobolds are gourmets. It's not you fault that King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) is hungry. It's not your fault that the tastiest thing a KObold has ever eaten is sweet baby! And it's defineatly, not your fault that Kobolds are the most incompetent, reckless, and accident prone race to ever crawl out of a cave. But it is your problem...
King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) needs you - yes, you - to go out to the nearby human town and bring back the freshest, tastiest, plumpest human babies you can find - or, the King will be eating you (and Kobold's pretty darn tasty.)”
The humor is pretty dark. You’re out baby hunting against a sleepy village of commoners. Your kobold character is pretty useless, but luckily you’re up against some equally useless human peasants with makeshift weapons. Even if the kobolds succeed the life expectancy of their entire tribe is going to be short, since you just know a nearby group of adventurers would be called in to genocide the lot of them.
2. Panty Explosion
This game is for all of you that always wanted to play Japanese school girl fighting demons. The authors claim that they picked the title to poke fun at the horrible way Japanese titles get converted into English and vice versa. This is not Urotsukidoji, the hentai tentacle RPG. It’s actually a horror RPG dealing with girls that have psychic powers. Because the girls still have to attend high school, their interactions with their classmates and stress at school affects their mental state, leaving them stronger or weaker when the demons finally move to attack from the spirit realm. The game is fairly complex, making the players spend as much time worrying about their characters social interactions and mental state as they do their combat statistics. It also includes character attributes important in Japanese culture, such as a spiritual background based on one of the five Japanese elements and the character’s blood type. It has a pretty devoted fanbase.
3. Grimm RPG and Little Fears RPG
Both of these games have done pretty well, so I am not going to choose between which is better. Both cover the idea of little kids having to battle monsters that aren’t so imaginary. As you can imagine, they are both horror RPGs with Little Fears dealing with more modern monsters while Grimm delves into the twisted Grimm Fairy Tales. I’ve actually heard of people playing this game with their children, but being a lot lighter on the horror elements and allowing little Johnny to feel like he could beat up that boogie man he keeps imagining is in the closet.
4. Paranoia RPG
God, I love me some Paranoia. The above cover is from the version I grabbed in the early 90s. This is an RPG that encourages players to kill off one another in hilarious ways, and for the GM to kill them off at his whim. It’s ok, though, since they all have clones and immediately rejoin after each death. Until they run out that is. The RPG takes place in an underground fallout shelter after World War 3 wiped out mankind on the surface of the planet. Unfortunately the computer running the underground city was damaged during the attacks and was only able to rebuild its behavioral core from anti-Communist propaganda from the 1950s. The computer is constantly looking to eliminate communists, and runs a police-state dystopian society. Think Fallout with even more zany humor. I can’t help but think that the people who designed Portal also were familiar with this game. Not many people know about it today.
“SERVE THE COMPUTER. THE COMPUTER IS YOUR FRIEND! The Computer wants you to be happy. If you are not happy, you may be used as reactor shielding. The Computer is crazy. The Computer is happy. The Computer will help you become happy. This will drive you crazy. Being a citizen of Alpha Complex is fun. The Computer says so, and The Computer is your friend. Rooting out traitors will make you happy. The Computer tells you so. Can you doubt The Computer? Being a Troubleshooter is fun. The Computer tells you so. Of course the Computer is right. Troubleshooters get shot at, stabbed, incinerated, stapled, mangled, poisoned, blown to bits, and occasionally accidentally executed. This is so much fun that many Troubleshooters go crazy. You will be working with many Troubleshooters. All of them carry lasers. Aren’t you glad you have a laser? Won’t this be fun? There are many traitors in Alpha Complex. There are many happy citizens m Alpha Complex. Most of the happy citizens are crazy. It is hard to say which is more dangerous traitors or happy citizens.”
5. Mouse Guard
You play as armed mouse guarding your rodent society from external threats. Sounds pretty boring, until you realize that everything your mouse soldier has to fight is going to be much, much larger than you. This is the only RPG that I know of that can make a fight with a normal owl look epic. Throw in a medieval society of mice with noble houses and plenty of political scheming and you have an awesome RPG. The comic is pretty fun, too, and shows the heart of the game:
