NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[Delterius]

To be fair, I think Oblivion is a leading cause of color blindness in Bethesda.

 

[circ]

Thank you! Honestly, I thought the original fallout games were just using super low-poly models this whole time. Never thought of them as sprites

 

[Gerrard]

It's the game I played every day instead of learning for my final exams. Somehow, I still got my diploma

:mrpresident:

 

[PlanHex]

Now it's backwards compatible, here are Oblivion's best moments

After telling you you're definitely going to die in prison (rude), he whispers: "Hey, you hear that? The guards are coming..."

He wasn't lying, the guards were coming.

at its cleverest, at its most inventive, it caused millions to fall in love - not just with itself, but with its formula, one which would be crucial to the success of Bethesda's future releases as people kept coming back for more.

 

[anus_pounder]

Good movie.

 

[dunno lah]

http://www.theverge.com/2016/11/21/13703212/pokemon-sun-and-moon-gameplay-screenshots-descriptions

Good news! Pokémon Sun and Moon are just as disturbing as previous games
A careful curation of nightmares
by Megan Farokhmanesh@Megan_Nicolett Nov 21, 2016, 5:36pm EST
Pokémon is back in the newly released section this month with Pokémon Sun and Moon. The pair introduce a new region to explore, additional creatures to capture, and more importantly, a delightful mess of terrible nightmares to disrupt your sleep.

Despite being a franchise beloved by children and adults alike, each new Pokémon has always featured a handful of horrific backstories. Occasionally they’re about specific locations in the game, like Pokémon Tower in the first generation’s Lavender Town; other times they pertain to the history or nature of pokémon themselves.

On Twitter, players have been sharing shots of their latest pokémon journeys. The moments that have caught my attention are bundles of text that continue this wonderful tradition:


Unwilling to wait to catch each pokémon for its precious backstory, I spent some time digging around Bulbapedia, which already has the pokédex entries for the latest generation of monsters. I’ve returned with a collection of my favorite hell-children.


Araquanid

The first thing to note about Pokémon Sun and Moon is that its description of each pokémon is different depending on the game. In the case of Araquanid, that difference is literally life or death. Just compare Sun’s description to what Moon has to say:

Pokémon Sun: It delivers headbutts with the water bubble on its head. Small Pokémon get sucked into the bubble, where they drown.

Pokémon Moon: Despite what its appearance suggests, it cares for others. If it finds vulnerable, weak Pokémon, it protectively brings them into its water bubble.

Well, I guess that’s something you’d want to seriously think about before you let your sweetest, tiniest pokémon out to play with Araquanid.


Bewear

Sun labels Bewear as incredibly dangerous. Moon labels Bear as incredibly dangerous, but also quite loving!

Pokémon Moon: This Pokémon has the habit of hugging its companions. Many Trainers have left this world after their spines were squashed by its hug.

Crabrawler

Question: Do people eat pokémon?

Answer:

Pokémon Moon: It punches so much, its pincers often come off from overuse, but they grow back quickly. What little meat they contain is rich and delicious.

Guzzlord

Guzzlord is honestly just me in college, a classic case of a beer-chugging shy pooper.

Pokémon Moon: A dangerous Ultra Beast, it appears to be eating constantly, but for some reason its droppings have never been found.



Komala

This is pokémon goes full Plato.

Pokémon Sun: It is born asleep, and it dies asleep. All its movements are apparently no more than the results of it tossing and turning in its dreams.

Mimikyu

Pokémon Sun: Its actual appearance is unknown. A scholar who saw what was under its rag was overwhelmed by terror and died from the shock.

Wow, that’s so awful. Well, maybe Moon has a better descri—

Pokémon Moon: A lonely pokémon, it conceals its terrifying appearance beneath an old rag so it can get closer to people and other pokémon.

Welp.

Oh, hang on! This one has a “busted form,” whatever that mea—

Pokémon Sun: After going to all the effort of disguising itself, its neck was broken. Whatever is inside is probably unharmed, but it's still feeling sad.

Sandygast / Palossand

The good news about Sandygast, described below, is that it evolves into an even worse pokémon, Palossand. Palossand is a pile of nightmares and death. Palossand is an actual graveyard housing its own victims.

Pokémon Sun: Born from a sand mound playfully built by a child, this pokémon embodies the grudges of the departed.

Pokémon Sun: Possessed people controlled by this Pokémon transformed its sand mound into a castle. As it evolved, its power to curse grew ever stronger.

Pokémon Moon: Buried beneath the castle are masses of dried-up bones from those whose vitality it has drained.

Pyukumuku

I mean, really, nothing is more horrific than imagining yourself in a slap fight with someone who barfs up their spleen on you. On purpose.

Pokémon Sun: It lives in shallow seas, such as areas near a beach. It can eject its internal organs, which it uses to engulf its prey or battle enemies.

 

[Unkillable Cat]

It was inevitable:



Currently it's just a reskin of the main character and bombs switched out for TNT sticks, so no baddies flying off the screen Rick Dangerous-style. Still, better than nothing.

 

[Taka-Haradin puolipeikko]

 

[markec]

 

[Baron Dupek]

only 5?

 

[A user named cat]

 

[A horse of course]

Jaesun

 

[Havoc]

Hi, Larry.

 

[Jaesun]

Baby Arm's name is Jason....

 

[Infinitron]

Context: http://www.rpgcodex.net/forums/index.php?threads/greed-monger-insider-thread-drama-inside.98177/

 

[Hirato]

And crowbcat made another shitty video

 

[Murk]

Guy who wrote love letter to gothic made a video about bloodlines. Starts off rambling about gayness. Promising, no doubt.

 

[Turtle-Zone 3000]

Creating and sharing programs that violate a game’s terms of service are now illegal in South Korea.
http://www.moddb.com/games/overwatch/news/south-korea-amends-law-to-target-illegal-game-mods

PVPLive reports on a new amendment to a law that was passed by the South Korean parliament earlier this week. The amendment states that the creation and distribution of programs that are not allowed by a game developer or the game’s terms of service is now illegal. The ramifications for doing so include the potential of US$43,000 in fines, or up to five years jail time.

Overwatch, which has become highly popular in South Korea for both competitive and casual players, is also riddled with hackers, PVPLive reports – many of which who use programs that originate in South Korea, and later spread to international servers. While companies such as Blizzard are able to ban the accounts of individual hackers, those hackers could simply purchase new accounts and continue hacking.

While it’s clear that the intention behind this law is to target the creators of programs that interfere with competitive online games, such as hacks, aimbots, and other cheating software, the actual line between a mod and a hack – as defined by this amendment – is an unclear one. FilesNation reports that “Some games such as League of Legends and Overwatch have mods that use third party tools that, while non-malicious, would definitely fall foul of the law.”

It comes down to what each game defines as acceptable within its terms of service, and it should be noted that modding communities tend to form even around games that don’t ship mod tools or don’t directly support any tinkering with the product of any kind.

In South Korea gamez remain srs business.

 

[Gerrard]

You can be a "very competitive person" without being a piece of shit like they are. Should nuke that cuckland.

 

[pippin]

It really felt weird seeing the Codex in a video like this.

 

[Jigawatt]

Too bad we didn't have button parade fully active back then

 

[pippin]

Those brofists would be "it was aliens"

 

[Zep Zepo]

WTF is Jason and GM?

Zep--

 

[Gerrard]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1323027

China has just passed regulations on online games, in which there are specific parts on games with loot boxes.

The regulation (in Chinese) http://www.mcprc.gov.cn/whzx/bnsjdt/...05_464422.html

Translation regarding loot boxes:


2.6 ...Online game publishers shall promptly publicly announce information about the name, property, content, quantity, and draw/forge probability of all virtual items and services that can be drawn/forge on the official website or a dedicated draw probability webpage of the game. The information on draw probability shall be true and effective.

2.7 Online game publishers shall publicly announce the random draw results by customers on notable places of official website or in game, and keep record for government inquiry. The record must be kept for more than 90 days. When publishing the random draw results, some measures should be taken place to protect user privacy.

The regulation will be effective on May 1st, 2017.

Fucking China of all places got their shit together before the "western world".

 

[Havoc]

Thanks, China!