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Launch Fest?

Elhoim

Iron Tower Studio
Developer
Joined
Oct 27, 2006
Messages
2,879
Location
San Isidro, Argentina
Que ora es?

Donde es el boligrafo?

El boligrafo es sul la tabla.

Yo soy Giordano.

:lol:

For everyone who invested two, or five years learning Spanish, or for those who took the time on a crash course or just spent hard earned income buying phrasebooks, congratulations.

All your efforts and money will be completely useless in Argentina. But there is hope for you. It's not hard at all to learn the Argentine Language, in fact it only takes a few minutes as the following short read will demonstrate. Take the following Spanish language sentence:

Oye, ¿quien eres tú? Vienes aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas. (This translates to: "Hey, who are you? You come here to pick up women on the streets and to dance tango with them.")

But saying it like this will render you an ignorant tourist at best, or an inferior sub-human from a neighboring country next to best. With these simple ten, 12 steps below you will be able to make yourself understood in the Argie tongue:

1. Replace "oye" with a 1000% Argentine word, che. No one knows where this word came from, but many say it is derived from a Native American command, ironic since today virtually none of them are around. Wonder what happened to them?

Che, ¿quien eres tú? Vienes aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

2 "Che", following Argentine etiquette, is ALWAYS followed by the word "boludo", s term to express respect and friendship. Its closest translation in English language is believed to be "asshole".

Che boludo, ¿quien quien eres tú? Vienes aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

3. Quien is spelled the correct educated computer age way in Argentina, "kien"

Che boludo, ¿kien eres tú? Vienes aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

4. Replace "eres tu" with sos vos. Unfortunately, all those verbs in Spanish which had you eating the corners of your textbook are officially worthless. Argentines use an entirely different 2nd person singular pronoun (vos instead of tu), and that means all verb endings change too, so the conjugation of the verb 'to be' is not eres, but sos. Enjoy learning all 25,000 verb endings all over again!

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Vienes aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

5. "Vienes" must be replaced with venís. Again poor you, using the subject pronoun vos, has the effect of completely changing the spelling of verbs.

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

6. Take out "aquí" and use acá. Aquí is absolutely forbidden from use, as in Argentina this word sounds too much like Spanish, a language spoken in Chile, Mexico, Colombia, and other lesser developed countries.

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

To "recoger" or simply "coger"... tits the question

7. Here your options are a bit more open for you. You could replace "coger mujeres" ("to pick up women" in Spain and Latin America), with recoger mujeres, which is the correct way of saying "to pick up women" in Argentina. Another choice should be "buscar" mujeres (to look for women), wich would fully disclose the appreciation of the chances a stranger has on getting chicks unless he handles the local language. On the other hand, you could leave "coger mujeres" alone, if your intention is to FUCK the chicks right there on the spot, which was probably what you were thinking anyways. But if you want a bit more privacy, we do advice to replace "coger" with "buscar".

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a buscar mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.

(ps- ALWAYS replace "coger" with "tomar" or "agarrar" when saying you want to "take" a bus. In Spanish-speaking nations coger el bus is the correct form of saying "taking the bus". In Argentina saying this will probably lead to a response like "sure, go ahead, I guess you can do so through the muffler".)

8. "Mujeres" is a far too formal expression not a single Argentine would deign to pronounce. A more appropriate word would be "minas" (chicks), a slang which has also the benefit of expressing properly the high consideration Argentines have towards the feminine gender.

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a buscar minas en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.


9. In Argentino, all nouns have their syllables switched so that "tango" became "gotan". So always reverse the syllables of all nouns, it's simple and you won't go wrong in your quest to fit in!!

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a buscar minas en la calle y bailar gotán con ellas.

10. Change "bailar" ("to dance") to "apilar" ("to dance"), just because. It's the slang and the law, just like one does not say "trabajar" ("to work") but rather "laburar" ("to work"). Live with it.

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a buscar minas en la calle y apilar gotán con ellas.

11. If you are in Buenos Aires, Uruguay and some other areas, further rules have to be applied. To be precise, within the borders of the described regions one should consider all territories below the Tropic of Capricorn, when Saturn fulfill its duty in the fifth house of Uranus, and Mars is conjunction with Titanus. And, of course, during full moon. In Main Argentino you have to pronounce the "ll"s correctly, so switch out "calle" with "ca-sshe", and "ellas" for e-sshas.

Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a buscar minas en la ca-sshe y apilar gotán con e-sshas.

12. You can leave "en la calle" ("on the street") alone, as this is how every local and tourist ends up when their girlfriend or wife finds out they were carrying out the commands of this sentence. And presto! You are speaking Argentino.

Spanish: Oye, ¿quien eres tú? Vienes aquí a coger mujeres en la calle y bailar tango con ellas.
Argentino: Che boludo, ¿kien sos vos? Venís acá a buscar minas en la ca-sshe y apilar gotán con e-sshas.

See, no difference at all!

http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Argentina
 

dagorkan

Arbiter
Joined
Jul 13, 2006
Messages
5,164
cardtrick said:
Elhoim said:
Vault Dweller said:
We should definitely wait for him. He's bringing hot Argentinian chicks.

Fixed.

I always thought the word for "from or of Argentina" should be "Argentiny" rather than "Argentinian." Probably just me.
Yeah it's Argentine, as I endlessly tell everybody. Dumbfucks never learn.
 

Elhoim

Iron Tower Studio
Developer
Joined
Oct 27, 2006
Messages
2,879
Location
San Isidro, Argentina
GiordanoWC said:
Elhoim said:
Somos Argentinos y se acabó la discusión. No me hinchen los huevos por como se dice en inglés.

Puede hablar ingles, argentino, esp... y Ital tambien? tienes mucho italianos en Argentina, no?

Si, la mayor parte de la población son desciendentes de italianos o españoles. De hecho mi madre es española y mi padre descendiente de italianos.
 

OSK

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Jan 24, 2007
Messages
8,034
Codex 2012 Codex 2013 Codex 2014 PC RPG Website of the Year, 2015 Codex 2016 - The Age of Grimoire Make the Codex Great Again! Serpent in the Staglands Dead State Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Shadorwun: Hong Kong Divinity: Original Sin 2 BattleTech Pillars of Eternity 2: Deadfire
¿Por qué? Porque otras personas están jugando baloncesto aquí.
 

Astromarine

Erudite
Joined
Jan 21, 2003
Messages
2,213
Location
Switzerland
funny that some of those changes from spanish to argentino really remind me of gallego and portuguese (especially brazilian portuguese, where the term minas came from.)
 

trollnest

Novice
Joined
Oct 1, 2007
Messages
2
Toronto? well thats a surprise, celebration beer on college or st. clair sounds good to me. I'd be there with prosthetic elf ears on.
 

temudzjin

Novice
Joined
Oct 23, 2007
Messages
3
Major_Blackhart said:
If you guys were in Jersey, you'd have a much better time with me. I take you along the scenic route: strip clubs, Illegal Gambling Houses run by either Asians or the Russian Mob, Betting Houses run by the wiseguys, whorehouses run by whores, gunrunners, drug dealers, the whole lot. It would be a fucking blast.


I like Jersey already!
Too friggin bad i live in the Netherlands.
 

Rulion

Liturgist
Joined
Dec 10, 2004
Messages
424
Location
bath salt city
FrancoTAU said:
Just stay clear of Newark when in Jersey.
Unless you like black people. kekeke.

No, but seriously, stay away from Newark. I once had to sit in on a trial as part of a school assignment. So I decided to go to the Essex County courthouse for the lulz factor. I wanted to get a murder, but ended up with something just as good. The case I observed was about some crackhead that stole the pillows from a pillow vendor (who sells pillows on the street, by the way?), got caught by the police, and was found with a few vials on him. The cop then told us where most of the crack buying goes on, and how it's available in different quantities. The cheapest of these was 5 bucks, good for one or two uses.

Blew me away. The pot I smoked in HS was more expensive than Newark crack.
 

John Yossarian

Magister
Joined
May 8, 2006
Messages
1,000
Location
Pianosa
So um, don't wanna start a whole thread for this, but we were promised, with every IT dev's hands on the bible, that we would get a new video this week. If VD can't stop wiping his tears long enough to post it, Flashback, I just donated to the Codex and want my money's worth.
 

Jora

Arcane
Joined
Mar 14, 2003
Messages
1,115
Location
Finland
BTW VD, Quarter to Three no longer has the verification system for new members so you're free to make an account there and join any discussion the new video might kindle. Maybe the people there would react more favorably to the gospel if you participated too.
 

Jora

Arcane
Joined
Mar 14, 2003
Messages
1,115
Location
Finland
Jedi_Learner said:
Will it be posted at RPG Vault like last time?
Hopefully not. It takes ages for them to publish anything. Their 'coming soon' page is constantly crowded.
 

Vault Dweller

Commissar, Red Star Studio
Developer
Joined
Jan 7, 2003
Messages
28,038
Jedi_Learner said:
Will it be posted at RPG Vault like last time?
No. It will be posted on our site. I'll let you know when we finish the tweaking and start "recording".
 

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