In Progress Let's Watch a Newfag Struggle Through High Difficulty BG!

[boot]

 

[Wayward Son]

Yeah, well, I was tired when I rolled it and may have taken your "I'll be your sister" joke a little too far. Don't worry though, you'll be dying soon enough anyway.

 

[Wayward Son]

Tragedy has struck!

 

[ALchymist]

I sing of the glories of second breakfast. Make me a halfling bard if you still need more characters - and the tragedy is not too extreme.

 

[Wayward Son]

I sing of the glories of second breakfast. Make me a halfling bard if you still need more characters - and the tragedy is not too extreme.

Oh no, it wasn't EXTREME. It was fixed. I'll put you on the roster.
EDIT:Update will be written tonight or tomorrow.

 

[veskoandroid]

I'm a faladin, and the only one of these jerks who will follow the laws. I'm good with swords and bows and am very intelligent. I come from a land called Phaerie and I proudly wear the colors as such. You may call me Commte

Corrected. ^_^ Couldn't help it, he sounds so gay! :-P

 

[Wayward Son]

Tragedy!!!1!!! Death In The Glorious Vanguard​

And here we see our motley crew assemble in front of the keep.
(For some reason, photo capture bugged out on me here and I got nothing, so just imagine a saddening story of a child losing his father and Azzira flipping shit whilst boot tries to comfort the hero.)

Here we meet the pervy mage Elminster, who takes an especial interest in our mental health.

What the hell? You tryin'to rape me, or something? 'Cause if so, I got a sword with your name on it.
After shuffling and mumbling awkward apologies, Elminster goes away.

Hrmph, g'job kid. Ye handled that like a true Incliner.

Here we see our group having slaughtered a group of gibberlings in seconds. Even on high difficulty this seems easy.

Xvarts.

Nothing more need be said.

Holy Fuck. And now is when I eat my words.

Attack!!!

Before I could even think, tragedy strikes. With ine heavy-handed swing the ogre takes Azira's life away, along with his head.

No. NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I will avenge you, Azira!

And avenge he did. The Vanguard of Incline attempts to figure out what to do to with this loss.
The bickering was solved when Wayward stood and declared:

No. We will find the nearest temple and pay whatever be needed to ressurect him. I may not have known him, but he sacrificed himself for us and is our only healer, so practicality demands that we ressurect him ASAP, as we canot heal as much as we need without him and any replacements may be far away. So, let's move out!

With healer down, no spell casts and Comte, our only armored fighter, near death, fighting this dire wolf could be suicide.

So, that's what we do exactly.

Well, fuck. That was unexpected. Not a single scratch, even on our shieldless, armor-less F/M.

We arrive in Beregost.

Hello, sir. Where may we find rest and a temple.
Obviously, the man has no clue where the nearest temple is , but he gives us directions to all the inns.
We purchase a potions and keep searching for the temple.

We go back to Beregost and find Feldepost's.

We sell all our shit to get 101 gold.
We wander, bloody, broken and battered to the Temple nearby. As we drag in our dead compatriot's limp corpse, the priest... still asks what service we want.

So we tell him to resurect Azira...
For all our money...
I hope he's grateful.

W-wha? Where? You... you revived me? You fuckers! I was drinking a partying in Valhalla with Thor! He doesn't even existhere, for God's sakes.
After much rejoicing, we decide to put the loot from the Ogre to the test.
boot tries on a random girdle, thinking it will make her look hotter, when...

we find out it's one of the tranny belts! (This make you happy, now?)
And with that, we leave. Tragedy came and was averted.

 

[Azira]

I was dead, and now I'm not?

And here I thought I could get away easily.

 

[Wayward Son]

I was dead, and now I'm not?

And here I thought I could get away easily.

I revived you at the Temple. At the time, we had no replacements, so it was the only option.

 

[Wayward Son]

Informal poll time!
So, someone (not gonna mention who) has died. We are rich, so I could
A) Remedy the situation by reviving him. Or, I could
B) Use Gatekeeper to recreate him as another one down the roster at a later(read:soon) point.
You choose!
Poll will close after I put the next one or two updates up.

 

[Azira]

Huh. Back in the queue. B

 

[Wayward Son]

Let's Laugh our Asses Off at the Failures of a Newfag Part 3:
Of Wolves, Wizards and Chickens​

Welcome one and... one back to the wonderful world of Baldur's Gate. Last time we ressurcted Azira and gave boot the tranny belt.
Let's get started:

We're traveling.

WE identify the other belt.

And, oh fuck. Is that a black bear?

We come out of it wounded, but its nothing Azira can't handle...

Along with some resting.

We walk into a random wizard's laboratory.

And Courage gets courageously and tastefully ass-raped by his flesh golem.

Or did he? I'm serious, Ive got no fucking clue what that last screenie was, or where it came from, so let's forget it ever happened.

And we go to face the flesh golems...

And courageously run.

These stupid skellintoons attack Comte, the local faggot frenchman.

Ehhohoh, these abominasion ne savais pas what hit them!

And indeed they didn't

My intelligense has prevailed yet again!

We travel South a ways.

BTW, just to show we aren't pussies.

Us getting tastefully raped.

The wolves lie broken and bloodied before us.

Comte, I just cannot even, I clicked a spot that that wasn't even on the way to.

We have to fight this fucker without the aid of the Frenchman.

Courage has to flee. Or shall we say, run?

Oh, and there's a chicken.
He tells us to go find the mage or blah blah

WE travel to High Hedge.

His retarded golems don't attack this time
He talks a lot, casts antichickenator and talks a bit more.
Character Sheet Time!
ME:

I'm a bodybuilding genius who has no ability to speak to others and is blisteringly unwise.

Comte's intelligence continues to be his strong suit.

boot's strength and dex are almost godlike, and he/she/it's decently intelligent to boot.

Courage is a very handsome man (no homo) who can withstand a lot of torture (plenty of homo).

Azira has the strength and endurance to back up his wise words. And if you don't believe that he's gonna clobber you.

All in all, we're a very incline team. Character sheets will be posted once every three updates, or when levels are gained/ party members lost.

Sorry for the wait reader, I was... uh busy. With what, you ask? Well, its initials are DHoU.
Edit: Almost forgot, due to unforeseen tragedies, the roster is open. I only have one character in there and was hoping for at least one more.

 

[Krivol]

Oh those figurines are so great. I have no idea why they have changed them in BG2 .

And for not min-maxing characters (I mean cleric and paladin with str 17 and dex 10 ..)

 

[Wayward Son]

And for not min-maxing characters (I mean cleric and paladin with str 17 and dex 10 ..)

Totally didn't minmax, nope not at all.

 

[Space Insect]

I might as well throw in my lot:
Name: Insectoid
Race: Elf
Class: Mage (Are there specializations in BG1?)
Just pump intelligence as main stat, some constitution and dexterity would also be nice.

 

[Wayward Son]

Are there specializations in BG1?)
Just pump intelligence as main stat, some constitution and dexterity would also be nice.

1. There are Mage specializations, would you like to change?
2. I always pump CON, there's no reason not to.

 

[Space Insect]

1. There are Mage specializations, would you like to change?
2. I always pump CON, there's no reason not to.

Make him a Conjuration specialist then.

 

[Wayward Son]

1. There are Mage specializations, would you like to change?
2. I always pump CON, there's no reason not to.

Make him a Conjuration specialist then.

Coolio.

 

[Krivol]

Well, DEX only 10 means about 6 AC less than if 18 so it's a gimping a character IMO .

 

[Wayward Son]

Well, DEX only 10 means about 6 AC less than if 18 so it's a gimping a character IMO .

He needed to have at least 17 CHA as a paladin for some reason. So, in order to have high strength and con, he needed low Dex. That sounds like minmaxing to me.

 

[Krivol]

I think you could drop some points from intelligence - paladins are well known as not the sharpest knifes, you know

 

[Wayward Son]

I think you could drop some points from intelligence - paladins are well known as not the sharpest knifes, you know

I did. I lowered him to 7, which is the cusp of retardation.

 

[Krivol]

I was pretty sure you can drop it to 3

 

[Wayward Son]

Space Insect Elvescant be conjurers do you mind being a half-elf?

 

[Wayward Son]

ALchymist also, Halflings can't be bards, what are some other choices?