Alright, played for about an hour, first impressions and critique. Don't wanna be harsh since op's place seems in the right place, but then again, gotta keep a codexian standard of grognardism after all.
WRITING/SETTING
-Now, some might call this a matter of taste, but I believe there are some principles one should adhere to when writing, and one in particular is the need of a balance between all things. The world is presented in a manner so grim that it looses all impact and verisimilitude. Every piece of dialogue or description seems hellbent on reminding the reader that this [the game's] world is a most dark and perverse one in quite a preachy manner to boost. Which comes across as too fanciful to be believed; the real world isn't like that, and even if you wanted to argue in favour of this being fiction, the truth is that the human experience has to remain close enough to the universally known one if you're reaching for any kind of emotional impact.
-If you wanna introduce a player to the mechanics of the game, then do so right away. Or better yet, give him a manual, because having in-world characters tutoring you on how to play is quite grating, it breaks all the immersion you seem to be striving to build.
-You know the whole show, don't tell thing? Exactly the opposite is happening here. The game is too verbose for its own good. Even if the quality of the prose isn't offensive on itself, it seems to have missed the fact that games aren't books. Seize the tools of the medium, you've got more than words to play with here.
-On that very subject: rpg maker, like gms, has a very particular way of presenting text that makes it quite a slog to read. How do you deal with this? Either you get a better engine or give me less to read. LISA is an example of a fantastically crafted game using such a shitty tool.
GRAPHICS/ART
-Serviceable, but while this is precisely one of the points where I believe more license is to be warranted towards unorthodox means —even moreso if the game is built around story-telling—, the game doesn't. Instead it falls into the trap of having everything be black, brown, and grey to seem dark and it doesn't really work. Again, the crappy rendering provided by the engine makes a mess of what would be detailed tiling.
SOUND
-Sound design is just poor. Music is sort of alright, but could be doing so much more for the ambiance. The audio effects are of very poor quality and rather detract from the experience.
C&C/CUSTOMIZATION
-Light to none as far as I've seen, but then again I didn't play that much.
COMBAT
-Unexpectedly, this seems to be the most fleshed-out part of the game. A lot of care has been put to design a system where every movement should be considered as there's little room for fuck-ups. I finished all of my fights quite close to the edge, which made for some satisfying victories indeed.
And yet again an aspect hurt by the engine's short-comings. If the very same principles applied in here where to be reworked into one that allowed for character positioning for extra tacticool points I wouldn't even mind the fact that there's no character creation or customization at all.
FINAL WORDS
Will play some more this next days to see if it picks up, but I don't think it's made for my tastes. Still, kudos to the author for actually taking and finishing a game; it looks like it was made with a lot of dedication notwithstanding the outcome, and I can respect that.
Also, I would promote this in jrpg rather than wrpg forums, it seems to stray much closer to their design basis.