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Completed Let's find out if Mistmare is the worst RPG of all time

lightbane

Arcane
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
10,208
B, Decline.

The Inqusition doesn't negotiate with terrorists heretics.
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
I have no vote, but looks like B'll win anyway. Tricky! Daring decision in a city where the church is weak.
 

Commissar Draco

Codexia Comrade Colonel Commissar
Patron
Joined
Mar 6, 2011
Messages
20,856
Location
Привислинский край
Insert Title Here Strap Yourselves In Divinity: Original Sin Project: Eternity Torment: Tides of Numenera Wasteland 2 Divinity: Original Sin 2
Maybe the game got those 0 stars for wall of text dialogue and not enough bloom? Graphics looks kinda shit alla umoded Morrowind but story and settings are interesting so far... How about combat and controls is this game playable?

Got copy from High Seas Voyage but it is Pa Ruskij. :x
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
Yeah, Twinkle, what up wid dat!? You promised us one of the worst RPGs, this looks pretty decent or kind of meh, really. Can't see in an LP how bad the controls/interface are, of course.

The writing does seem like more of a weakness. I mean, they've got interesting ideas but the dialog just drags and isn't very interesting. Good example of why bragging about quantity in RPG writing is not a good idea, not if you're lacking in quality.
 

Twinkle

Liturgist
Joined
Sep 14, 2009
Messages
1,426
Location
Lands of Entitlement
Commissar Draco said:
Maybe the game got those 0 stars for wall of text dialogue and not enough bloom? Graphics looks kinda shit alla umoded Morrowind but story and settings are interesting so far... How about combat and controls is this game playable?

Got copy from High Seas Voyage but it is Pa Ruskij. :x

It looks way worse than Morrowind esp. on modern machines, since you can't go above 800x600. Mouse sensitivity is way too high, good thing is that my mouse has adjustable DPI. Setting is indeed interesting but that's where the positives end. Almost zero filler combat but crapload of FedEx quests and boring traipsing between point A and point B which this LP of course skips. Bad frame drops in cities. That said it's not completely unplayable, just tedious and unfun. And the game is still above MM9, Ultima 9 or Dung Lords level.

Also, Commissar Draco if you are desperate send me a PM and I'll let you, mmm, borrow my copy. :smug:


Brother None said:
Yeah, Twinkle, what up wid dat!? You promised us one of the worst RPGs, this looks pretty decent or kind of meh, really. Can't see in an LP how bad the controls/interface are, of course.

The writing does seem like more of a weakness. I mean, they've got interesting ideas but the dialog just drags and isn't very interesting. Good example of why bragging about quantity in RPG writing is not a good idea, not if you're lacking in quality.

Well, devs were Slovenian so they probably couldn't into proper English. Decent overall storyline is marred by weak dialog and ham-fisted wtf moments.
 

Twinkle

Liturgist
Joined
Sep 14, 2009
Messages
1,426
Location
Lands of Entitlement
CHAPTER 3, PART 2

Never compromise!

mi07-01.jpg


And so Izzy goes to jail.

He wakes up in a cell, all gates open and prison guards missing. All his inventory items including weapons are intact, only magical scythe is missing.

Seriously, developers made the whole thing incredibly moronic. OK, I understand that the count wanted fog monsters to eat Izzy and that's why guards have left The Bastille and kept cells open. But why let him keep his weapons? Or not simply kill him on the spot to be sure? Stupid.

mi07-02.jpg


Isador meets the only other prisoner.

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Time to fight out way to freedom.

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Izzy reaches the main courtyard but gates front locked tight and there is no way to open them.

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Thus he uses the alternative way to escape - through the catacombs.

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Finds a key in a chest.

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Also, Isador meets several commoners hiding in catacombs. They refuse to talk but obviously are getting ready for something.

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Hiding warehouse in freaking catacombs? Must be criminals.

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Booty isn't that rich, but Izzy discover a well-made portrait made in Dutch style. Another country that survived the Fog?

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Goin' back.

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Another exit leads to Notre Dame. Neat.

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There can be no mercy for traitorous heretics. Witch must die!

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Streets of Paris aren't peaceful anymore. Soldiers attack Isador on sight.

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I go straight for the armory where they locked harvesting scythe.

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And dispatch of all soldiers inside.

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and get Izzy's scythe back.

mi07-36.jpg


The key that a suspicious citizen gave Izzy some time ago opens a secret door in the armory.

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Heh, the "alternate" France is still rife with immigrant problems.

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I unleash wrath of my pokemons on oppressor guards.

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No quarter for you.

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FORWARD, MY POKEMONS!

I summon them right on top of her head. She dies instantly.

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Such is the fate of all heretics, witch!

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Don't be fooled by her stripper outfit. When you loot her body you find that she actually wears plate armor, r00fles! Her poisoned magical green sword is very neat and is extremely effective angainst p. much every opponent. A definite keeper.

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Transcendency school is cool as well, if only because it allows to cast a spell that boosts running speed which somewhat helps without tedious fedex assignments game is full of.

Now Isador's aiming to help poor Slav kid.

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He successfully finds necessary birth certificates.

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So now I need to "release" that dude I met in The Bastille

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You are free already, idiot! :lol:

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I leave catacombs through Notre Dame exit.

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In the meantime more numerous and tougher soldiers spawned on the streets.

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Izzy returns to the tavern and chats with barkeeper.

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I have this one already. Here we go.

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Good, good.

I focus on improving transcendency school.

mi07-69.jpg


Neanderthals can dream too.

Isador sees the map of good ol' Europe.

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Three dots appear on the map symbolizing the three great cathedrals - in Rome, in Avignon and in Paris.

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They form a Link.

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And the Fog covers 2/3rds of continental Europe.

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mistwasaninsidejob

During daytime one of the rebels stops Isador.

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So I skip time to hear his proposition

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I run straight to the tavern. Certificates should be ready by then.

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Situation on the streets escalates. Groups of rebels openly attack patrolling soldiers.

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Isador implants the falsified birth certificates at the courthouse.

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Kid should be happy to hear that

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Well, I have to visit catacombs anyway, where his dad hides.

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Let's what the rebel leader has to say.

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So guys again we have to make a choice: going against your manipulative brothers in faith or staying loyal. What should we do:

a) Join the rebel cause

or

b) Refuse
 

ironyuri

Guest
It's going to take a lot of work if Project Eternity is going to be half as shit as this. But I believe in Obsidian's abilities.
 

Lindblum

Augur
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
659
A
We sacrificed so much for the church and where has that landed us?
Thrown in a fucking catacomb and we have been played by that priest Fag to kill a hot witch.

Also lets kill that guy who threw us in jail.
 

lightbane

Arcane
Joined
Dec 27, 2008
Messages
10,208
B Refuse them and purge the local Church which lacks of Zeel and Rightues Hatred Yourself.

This, the corruption of the Church is heretical, but the so-called 'democracy' that these rebels say is an even worse sin, nothing good can come from leaving all power to the masses. Therefore, I say... Purge everything!!!
 

kazgar

Arcane
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
2,164
Location
Upside Down
Twinkle, two missing images at the end of that update?

mi07-93.jpg and mi07-94.jpg ?

hmm, will purging the church stop the bell tolling, allowing the fog to run riot through the town?
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
The Dutch probably just built a bunch of dykes against the fog :M

Also "in the La Bastille". In the the Bastille!

Anyway, I'm for A. I mean jeesh, how obvious does this game need to make it that da Church is Evuhl.
 

kazgar

Arcane
Joined
Apr 23, 2008
Messages
2,164
Location
Upside Down
yeah, i'm going with A, maybe the fog will win once the church is cleansed. but that's ok, we got a shield and we're heading north!
 

Twinkle

Liturgist
Joined
Sep 14, 2009
Messages
1,426
Location
Lands of Entitlement
CHAPTER 3, PART 3

Viva la Revolucion!

mi08-01.jpg


Bishop's hidden vault is located in the catacombs too. It's guarded by three sorcerer monks.

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After disposing of them Isador grabs the ring.

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And sees another vision. This is most certainly a representation of Notre Dame

mi08-06.jpg


I don't know what this red thingie symbolizes. Looks like a weird mix between a human and a keyhole

mi08-07.jpg


And then fire consumes them. Izzy, what have you done?

mi08-08.jpg


Rebels were right - ring's magical powers aren't just a myth.

mi08-09.jpg


Oh well, too late to contemplate...

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Improved spellcasting speed. Awesome.

mi08-11.jpg


Time to raid Dumont's mansion again. It's empty after Sophie's death.

mi08-12.jpg

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Her notes reveal a new, unique school of magic - Disintegration.

mi08-14.jpg


Apart from training there is nothing to do till the next timelock.

mi08-15.jpg


If you visit the bishop he'll refuse to talk to you, but doesn't turn hostile.

mi08-16.jpg


Then a kid stops Isador.

mi08-17.jpg


Ironically, Paris while being one of the biggest maps in the game has the smallest amount of mandatory content. After escaping The Bastille you can just waste time at the tavern or somewhere else, but you'll miss some of the best items game has to offer.

OK, It's time to test the new magic. Disintegration is all or nothing - either it kills enemy outright or doesn't do squat. The price of failure is depleted stamina bar.

mi08-18.jpg


Au revoir, heathens.

mi08-19.jpg


Well, time to do some Diablowing.

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Not much of a differences compared to fog areas I visited before. Lame. Whatever, I just run past monsters. No XP for killing can be a good thing.

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A safe zone for training.

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I add another specimen to my menagerie.

mi08-25.jpg


High-level zombies make excellent training dummies. Combat skills increase at tremendous rate, and evading their slow attacks is trivial.

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And I'm done with them

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http://youtu.be/dFD-oE_J674

Hello, Antwerp.

mi08-32.jpg
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
So...I don't get it. How do cities like Antwerp still exist if they're in the middle of the Mist? Or Paris? Shouldn't they all be dead? How did they survive so long?
 

Twinkle

Liturgist
Joined
Sep 14, 2009
Messages
1,426
Location
Lands of Entitlement
CHAPTER 4, PART 1

Isador needs to chill a bit.

mi09-01.jpg


Among the habitable cities you visit Antwerpen feels the most close to ITZ. Constant fogging and oppressive architecture gives it a noticeable Lovercraftian vibe.

mi09-02.jpg


The tavern feels like the most appropriate place to ask for directions.

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But it turns out to be a cathouse.

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Either bartender really knows nothing or just acts the dummy

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Let's check these monks.

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Surprisingly, they turn out to be really nice and helpful guys. What the hell with this treebellhugging? :decline:

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Time to check local vendors. I start with blacksmith.

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He's a nice bro, and probably the only one in the game that can upgrade existing weapons. Helping him could be mutually beneficial.

I buy a shovel from him, looks like it might be useful.

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mi09-18.jpg


Again, the same fucking arena. Stop it.

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The ruined monument is surrounded by huge but docile monsters.

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He got stuck in the patch of glass and doesn't even counterattack.

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Visiting the basement.

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Ancient, useless weapons and armor stored in these chests. That will do.

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Izzy prays at the shrine right there.

mi09-27.jpg


And here goes another vision. Three armed guys stand on a field.

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The fog consumes them.

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And only their swords remain, stuck in the ground.

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Reporting our success.

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A ship? That's interesting. It means that sailing through the Fog is actually possible.

Isador goes back to the tavern to check the latest rumors.

mi09-34.jpg


And this visit ends up being the first confrontation with a gang of alchemists.

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Isador demonstrates his mighty cojones, too bad he doesn't let anyone lick them :(

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I check with bellringers bros to see if they need any assistance.

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Ironically, the street beggar that sits just a few steps away from the entrance to bellringer residence is way more knowledgeable on the subject.

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I follow beggar's directions.

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And on the other side a gang of monsters immediately close on Isador.

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The notes are hidden really close.

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Skipping time.

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He teaches the Twilight school of magic. It's concentrated on powerful buffs with interesting effects like damage-reflecting aura, resurrecting dead, teleportation or massive BLOOM that blinds enemies.

OK, moving on.

mi09-51.jpg

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This guy, Gullik, is one of the leader of this gang of alchemists. Bella warned Isador about him and so did other NPCs.

mi09-53.jpg


OK, let's make a choice, guys. If you've been paying attention you would know that the alchemists are nasty, mean bunch. But maybe working for them can yield some benefits both in monetary gains and in terms of lore.

Shall we:

a) Work for them

or

b) Tell them to fuck off in most courteous way possible?
 

Lindblum

Augur
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
659
Lets piss off those henchmen by showing that we can replace them.
Hopefully the Church in this town isn't evil.
A.
 

Brother None

inXile Entertainment
Developer
Joined
Jul 11, 2004
Messages
5,673
I dunno about this one. Those alchemists don't sound all that trustworthy. I'm going with B.
 

Erebus

Arcane
Joined
Jul 12, 2008
Messages
4,771
B

I wouldn't trust these alchemists if they offered me a philosopher's stone.
 

Twinkle

Liturgist
Joined
Sep 14, 2009
Messages
1,426
Location
Lands of Entitlement
CHAPTER 4, PART 2

Can't pass on an opportunity to play bad boy. Not that it will matter in the end...

mi10-01.jpg


I want to be a mafioso. :yeah:

The barber is a nice guy, too bad Izzy is not manly enough to require his services :(

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I am the prince of the city, bitches!

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Aw man, this is HARDCORE.

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Unfortunately, that's where fun ends. Main quest is stalled till Gullik returns, so there is no other option other than stroll around the town and help civilians.

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Undertaker's senile dad sits in a wheelchair just across the street

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Bluff works fine on him

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Isador gathers wood at the fog-filled outskirts

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One kid's boasting about discovering some treasure. Gotta keep my eye on him.

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U MAD BRO??? :lol:

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Oh, well...

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Whatever, continuing our Samaritan act.

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Jerk.

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Mussel feud. What can be better?

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Whoever the Akkermans are helping them would be a better options than messing with these dorks.

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The said treasure is located at the outskirts in the locked chest.

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Yeah, a whopping 1k gold coins :roll:

With night approaching and nothing better to do visiting a local bar seems to be a good course of action.

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Oh, yeah, we'll make a proper sinner out of you boy.

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Yeah, do it!

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He wastes 4 hours on healing the old whore.

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You mean working for gangsters and threatening to break old lady's legs is fine by you but a little bedded diversion is not? It's like you live by MPAA creed, boy.

Amusingly, the painting on the wall isn't targeted at straight brothel visitors. Dem kinky ferret lovers.

mi10-37.jpg


The barkeeper isn't too talkative, again.

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Unlike the drunk lighthouse keeper.

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Local sheriff might look like a BDSM porn star, but underneath he's just s cowardly wuss.

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Ok, moving along.

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And here goes another vision. We see the city of Antwerpen surrounded by the fog and our good friend Isador.

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And a few warriors carrying green staffs encircle him.

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And then it dissipates.

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This crystal be inserted into Isador's scythe, which means a new pokemon for our menagerie.

The Antiquarian is the only guy Izzy haven't paid a visit to yet.

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Inquisitor, the master of pilfering.

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Oh, this kid again.

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I hope the kid will be grateful enough...

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I have to run through the same looking fog area one more time. Lazy, lazy job.

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The forest chapel is guarded by alchemic warriors. They aren't open to negotiations and attack on sight.

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They are one of the very few well done enemies in this game. Similarly to Isador they can both cast spells and fight in melee so the cheesiest tactics don't work on them.

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Oh, what a nasty bunch. Well, at least they were seeking gold rather than engaging in ritual sacrifices or similar sick shit.

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This guy kicked my ass seriously. Took a few minutes to put his debuffing ass down.

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Such a shame - there will be no treasure.

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I visit antiquarian's shop again. This sword catches my attention. Isn't it a bit too pricey for such stats? I'll take the plunge, because shops in this game carry mostly shovelware anyway.

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So it can be reforged to its true from. Nice.

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Let's find the said Anvil.

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It is surrounded by a large group of critters. Unless you whack all of them the anvil remains unusable. Time to unleash my pokemons and show 'em who's the boss.

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Success! The blade is reforged. Let's compare its stats to my current weapon.

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Hmm, it's base damage is higher than of a poisoned sword plus it deal some fire damage on hit. But overall I'm not sure if it's a worthy replacement.

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Gullik has arrived. Time to confront him.

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You can't accept his quest just because. You'll always end up fighting the alchemists - the story demands it. Fuck that shitty fake choice.

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Gullik is a tough son of a bitch. He possess roughly the same combat and magical skills as Isador and can heal himself. The tide of battle went both ways over the course or three or so minutes I fought him but in the end the holy warrior prevailed.

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After beating him Isador learn Viking school of melee combat. These bandits came from Scandinavia and somehow developed a completely different type of magic that doesn't rely on chords or tolling at all.
 

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