Review Oblivion tickles the loins of GamesRadar

[Saint_Proverbius]

Tags: Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

<a href="http://www.gamesradar.com/">GameRadar</a> has posted their <A href="http://www.gamesradar.com/us/pc/game/reviews/article.jsp?articleId=2006032116531934065&sectionId=1000">review</a> of <a href="http://www.elderscrolls.com">TES4: Oblivion</a>, following the long march of glossing over mediocrity and giving the game a <b>10/10</b> without pointing out anything remotely bad about the game. Here's the author's attempt at humor with references of popular TV shows:
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<blockquote>Remember that episode of The Simpsons where Homer goes to hell and is sentenced to eat donuts for eternity, only to find that all of the Krispy Kremes in the fiery abyss cannot quell his unending hankering for the fried doughy treats? Well it won't be long after you start playing The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion before you're just like the animated éclair-scarfer, except you'll be in hell fighting monsters and it'll be your penchant for adventuring and treasure hunting that'll be insatiable.</blockquote>
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Wait a minute.. <a href="http://www.krispykreme.com/">Krispy Kreme</a> doesn't make eclairs!
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Spotted at: <A HREF="http://www.bluesnews.com">Blue's News</A>

 

[Chefe]

So... playing Oblivion is like going to hell?

 

[bryce777]

No, playing Oblivion IS like hell. It's out now...booyah!

Rats and dragons of the same difficulty level, here I come!

 

[LaDoushe]

Dammit, nothing should get a 10/10. Most gaming rags didn't even give Halo that high.
SP, since you seem to be in the know, is there actually any mainstream outlet that could be considered a legitimate reviewer?

 

[Naked_Lunch]

SP, since you seem to be in the know, is there actually any mainstream outlet that could be considered a legitimate reviewer?

No.

 

[elander_]

Ovlivion is sending crpg gameplay to Oblivion. The final blow to the genre is when Fallout 3 will be released and get a 10/10 without having any crpg gameplay at all.

 

[bryce777]

Ovlivion is sending crpg gameplay to Oblivion. The final blow to the genre is when Fallout 3 will be released and get a 10/10 without having any crpg gameplay at all.

10/10? I am guessing at least a 12/10.

 

[Chefe]

Fallout 3? It will look like shit, play like shit, and have a story that's complete shit.

It will recieve an Infinity/10 from all magazines and large gaming sites.

 

[Nutcracker]

The current Bethesda design team will never be forgiven for taking a promising CRPG series and turning it into a crappy console port. I'd stake my fortune on them doing the same with Fallout btw.

 

[DarkUnderlord]

If we end up with giant font and sparesely used "dialogue", then Fallout 3 is doomed. To be honest, I'll say it's doomed even if it's not isometric and turn-based which I can tell you now Bethesda will never implement because they:

• Suck.
• Can't actually do anything other than create really poorly animated graphical first-person worlds.

 

[Tintin]

If we end up with giant font and sparesely used "dialogue", then Fallout 3 is doomed. To be honest, I'll say it's doomed even if it's not isometric and turn-based which I can tell you now Bethesda will never implement because they:

• Suck.
• Can't actually do anything other than create really poorly animated graphical first-person worlds.

Yeah I know. I was watching an Oblivion video today, it was just like a poorly animated world, and there was a crosshair, and you just press WASD to move back and forth and occasionally turn with the mouse, for 3 hours. God, they suck.

 

[Levski 1912]

I wouldn't mind a first-person Fallout too much, if everything else that made the game great was kept in.

 

[RuySan]

Dammit, nothing should get a 10/10. Most gaming rags didn't even give Halo that high.
SP, since you seem to be in the know, is there actually any mainstream outlet that could be considered a legitimate reviewer?

i would say www.eurogamer.net, and comparing to other mainstream sites Gamespot isn't that bad

 

[DarkUnderlord]

Yeah I know. I was watching an Oblivion video today, it was just like a poorly animated world

You saw that video too? Personally, I liked how the horse couldn't quite seem to move properly. Oh and the skating. That everyone wears skates in Oblivion is really, really cool.

 

[Tintin]

Yeah I know. I was watching an Oblivion video today, it was just like a poorly animated world

You saw that video too? Personally, I liked how the horse couldn't quite seem to move properly. Oh and the skating. That everyone wears skates in Oblivion is really, really cool.

The horses looked fine, except for the turning. I guess the "skating" will bother you if you are obsessed with that sort of thing. It's okay.

 

[HardCode]

Yeah I know. I was watching an Oblivion video today, it was just like a poorly animated world

You saw that video too? Personally, I liked how the horse couldn't quite seem to move properly. Oh and the skating. That everyone wears skates in Oblivion is really, really cool.

The horses looked fine, except for the turning. I guess the "skating" will bother you if you are obsessed with that sort of thing. It's okay.

Right. So by your logic, everything in the video is fine, even though things aren't fine.

 

[Tintin]

Yeah I know. I was watching an Oblivion video today, it was just like a poorly animated world

You saw that video too? Personally, I liked how the horse couldn't quite seem to move properly. Oh and the skating. That everyone wears skates in Oblivion is really, really cool.

The horses looked fine, except for the turning. I guess the "skating" will bother you if you are obsessed with that sort of thing. It's okay.

Right. So by your logic, everything in the video is fine, even though things aren't fine.

Uh......what are you talking about?

P.s.. I'm referring to the gameplay videos made by users on pcs with fraps, not Bethesdas hype videos...

 

[Saint_Proverbius]

I wouldn't mind a first-person Fallout too much, if everything else that made the game great was kept in.

Might I ask what you think makes Fallout great if you wouldn't mind first person? OH! LET ME GUESS! Hookers and drugs?

 

[Percolator Fish]

I wouldn't mind a first-person Fallout too much, if everything else that made the game great was kept in.

Might I ask what you think makes Fallout great if you wouldn't mind first person? OH! LET ME GUESS! Hookers and drugs?

You guys are so full of shit. The only thing that made Fallout stand out back in the day was the third person perspective and the turnbased combat, something that no other rpg had ever done before. If it isn't a third person, turnbased game it can't be an rpg, it can't be fun, and it certainly can't be FALLOUT. :evil:

 

[Twinfalls]

Goddamit Vault Dweller you are the worst news poster on the internet ohwaitasecondnevermind

 

[Section8]

You guys are so full of shit. The only thing that made Fallout stand out back in the day was the third person perspective and the turnbased combat, something that no other rpg had ever done before.

<giggles madly and spits in Percolator Fish's mouth>

 

[DarkUnderlord]

Yeah I know. I was watching an Oblivion video today, it was just like a poorly animated world

You saw that video too? Personally, I liked how the horse couldn't quite seem to move properly. Oh and the skating. That everyone wears skates in Oblivion is really, really cool.

The horses looked fine, except for the turning. I guess the "skating" will bother you if you are obsessed with that sort of thing. It's okay.

Bethesda: Can't actually do anything other than create really poorly animated graphical first-person worlds? CHECK.

 

[meeneque]

I thought you guys do not give a damn about graphics...

 

[Oarfish]

Graphics are sweet, but throwing gameplay out for the sake of eyecandy is not. Beth banged on and on about their super graphics (much of which was cut after the shadowing demo had fulfilled its hype purpose) and cut features for their sake. Hence moaning.

 

[Saint_Proverbius]

I thought you guys do not give a damn about graphics...

Well, I also thought natural selection applied to humans, yet here you are. Guess we were both wrong!