In the beginning of the whole mess I mentioned that I was about to win this game - the last AI was cornered and beaten to dust. But then I left him alone to travel into the Void, and AI had plenty of time to recover. Which he did. The sheer
stupidity ballz of AI are impressive - to attack the Old Ones like that.
Well, tbh, High Cultist is pretty op. Very random ofc (nearly all summons will just kill the summoner straight away), but with a bit of luck it's very easy to play.
The Old Ones will either kill all your enemies, or the whole world.
Meanwhile in HEAVAN
Thunder Queen's spell list is revealed. No lvl 4 spells. Yay?
Well, the spells are still brutal. But Storm Magic 4 is not as scary as it seemed at first.
Dem birds, though...
AWRIGHT, WE CAME TO CONQUER! ENDURE THIS SHIT!
3 casts of Storm Wind? PHAH, it's nothing.
Wait... 3 casts.. of Storm Wind?
Lizzurd one-shots the gate, but I barely notice it right now.
Storm Winds is a lvl 2 spell. A lvl 2 mage can cast it once per combat round. A lvl 3 mage can cast it twice. Being a lvl 4 mage, the Queen of Thunder casts it three times per round. That's disturbing.
That means that...
HOLY SHIIIIEET
STAHP PLEASE STAHP
Phew. What? "Queen of Thunder casts Gale"? AGAIN? DOUBLE CAST OF GALE?!
JESUS! FUCK! SHIT! Lizzurd, do something dammit!
That... was not impressive.
Triple Chain Lightning. Will it ever stop?
Chain Lightning wasn't so bad, after all.
Hue hue hue. Nice try, Lizzurd. Nice try.
MOTHERFUCKER, JUST STOP ALREADY YOU BITCH, FUCK!
Oh come on, Lizzurd - it doesn't fucking work! Deal some damage, ffs!
... Yeah well. Some damage indeed.
Seriously, those chain castings start to really piss me off. I had an ARMY OF ELITE UNITS, dammit!
Show her who's boss, sqeecoo!
Keep dreaming, Lizzurd!
I mean, she kills her own troops! Fuck me!
FINISH HER FOR THE LOVE OF THE OLD GODS!
So. Lizzurd and sqeecoo made it. Let's see what's left of the army.
Why? Why did I come here? What did we fight for?
Okaaay. I guess. Would be even better if I had a storm mage. What, that's it? No other loot?
Oh, recruitment offer from Sylphs. Expensive as fucks, but that would be ok. If not for a single MINOR INCONVINIENCE - I can only recruit them here, in this elemental plane!
Seriously? I don't even know how to git the fuck out of here! Neither do I have any troops left to try and find out. I can recruit a single Yeti each turn of course (what's the deal with Yetis? Why are they fookin' everywhere?).
Allright, men - that's the end of story. I'm gonna finish off last AI with what I have in Elysium. Lizzurd and sqeecoo will stay in the Cloud Citadel til the end of times.
Sure, this plane drives sqeecoo crazy, so it probably won't be long until he suicides or smth. But Lizzurd actually likes it here. He can INVADE MINDS of Yetis all day, every day.
Morale of the story: I don't even