Dragon Age: Inquisition Pre-Release Thread

[Harold]

haha her hand is as low-poly as the arrows. And dat face ---> Bioware implying lesbianism gives you brain damage, gg wp

 

[Stainless Veteran]

Just what all the lesbians need.

Nah, Bioware already got Count Orlok fans covered.

 

[Athelas]

'Literally.'

 

[dryan]

It stopped being funny, now it's just depressing.

 

[Harold]

'Literally.'

'Literarily' would've worked better imo

 

[Caim]

Nah, Bioware already got Count Orlok fans covered.

I already pointed out that a good chunk of the cast looks like they were copied from The Legend of Korra, but if this Zaheer looking motherfucker starts talking about "earthly tethers" I'm gonna contact Nickelodeon.

 

[Tytus]

Nah, Bioware already got Count Orlok fans covered.

I already pointed out that a good chunk of the cast looks like they were copied from The Legend of Korra, but if this Zaheer looking motherfucker starts talking about "earthly tethers" I'm gonna contact Nickelodeon.

Zaheer at least had an awesome girlfriend. This guy can only romance desperate landwhales playing female inquisitors.

 

[Stainless Veteran]

Nah, Bioware already got Count Orlok fans covered.

I already pointed out that a good chunk of the cast looks like they were copied from The Legend of Korra, but if this Zaheer looking motherfucker starts talking about "earthly tethers" I'm gonna contact Nickelodeon.

Zaheer at least had an awesome girlfriend. This guy can only romance desperate landwhales playing female inquisitors.

Female elven-only inquisitors to boot, so it means even more annoying special snowflake "I-can't-play-ugly-boring-racist-humans" landwhales. Then again, looking at this mug - they truly are a perfect match.

 

[Angthoron]

I can't get over how horrible these characters look, and over how terrible the writing is. Literally.

 

[Cyberarmy]

Well, at least they are not going "all elves are magically beautiful" thing.
Since the first game...

 

[Angthoron]

I think they're going for "Everyone is magically ugly and has extra chromosomes" looks since the first game.

 

[vivec]

I think they're going for "Everyone is magically ugly and has extra chromosomes" looks since the first game.

I had to laugh at this.

 

[Jools]

Just what all the lesbians need.

Nah, Bioware already got Count Orlok fans covered.

Dragon Age: Evolution. Darwin's Missing Links Edition.

 

[Lyric Suite]

make attractive male in skimpy outfit and everyone loses their minds. bewbs falling out left and right on the battlefield and no one bats an eye. it's like DAI doesn't have actual points for concern. some of you guys are total idiots.

Joined: May 24, 2014

Ho, right, Biotards. Had no idea they still kept coming here. Can i shit post? I mean, its not like there's anything of value in this thread. Can i?

 

[PhantasmaNL]

The Bioware universe is apparently filled to the brim with hideous creatures. Ugly is the norm. Maybe it is a manifestation of millenia of genetic degredation or a reflection of the avarage Bioware employee.

Character creation challenge: make a toon which is even uglier than any of these npcs.

 

[Cyberarmy]

Character creation challenge: make a toon which is even uglier than any of these npcs.

This was a really easy challange in previous game, don't think it'll change.

 

[Lyric Suite]

What i don't understand is that there was a time i would have at least called Bioware competent on the technical side of things. Shit design and shit writing i can understand, but shit graphics seems to be a new addition to their general incompetence.

 

[Stainless Veteran]

What i don't understand is that there was a time i would have at least called Bioware competent on the technical side of things. Shit design and shit writing i can understand, but shit graphics seems to be a new addition to their general incompetence.

much grafiks

I'd say that in DA:O their shitty 3D modelers' efforts were somewhat mitigated by engine's limitations - that iteration of Aurora, (Eclipse, IIRC), really was bad in creating any good visuals, so their hands-from-ass thing wasn't so noticeable. In DA 2 though they were going for more stylized, cartoony style and failed hard, so both models and design became even more shitty.
But DA:I is being made on Frostbite, and we've seen it producing a fine visuals in Battlefield series. On better engine, the incompetence (and probably a lack of understanding or practice) of their 3d modelers is highlighted, because we can compare the results with both previous games and Battlefield series. Also, visual design (armor, clothing, architecture, etc.) for DA series was always bland and uninspiring, but in DA:I they somehow made it even worse.

 

[Lyric Suite]

For the record, i was talking about the entire Dragon Age series.

 

[Angthoron]

The Bioware universe is apparently filled to the brim with hideous creatures. Ugly is the norm. Maybe it is a manifestation of millenia of genetic degredation or a reflection of the avarage Bioware employee.

Character creation challenge: make a toon which is even uglier than any of these npcs.

 

[pippin]

The Bioware universe is apparently filled to the brim with hideous creatures. Ugly is the norm. Maybe it is a manifestation of millenia of genetic degredation or a reflection of the avarage Bioware employee.

Well...

But that elven girl is especially hideous. At least it's supposed to be an elf, right? I can't tell. Her lips look like she had herpes, which, considering Bio's general focus when it comes to writing, seems oddly appropiate. I suppose they just gave up and designed their characters so it could be easier for larpers to cosplay.

 

[Angthoron]

I suppose they just gave up and designed their characters so it could be easier for larpers to cosplay.

Ouch

 

[RPGMaster]

Rating Summary: This is a role-playing game in which players assume the role of a warrior battling evil forces in different dimensions. Characters use swords, axes, hammers, and magic attacks to kill fantastical creatures (e.g., demons, monsters, dwarfs) and humans in melee-style combat. Cutscenes sometimes depict characters impaled or getting their throats slit. Violent sequences are often highlighted by cries of pain, gurgling/gushing sounds, and large blood-splatter effects; blood remains on the ground in several environments. The game includes some sexual material: a female character briefly depicted in front of a man's torso (fellatio is implied); characters depicted topless or with exposed buttocks while lying in bed or after sex; some dialogue referencing sex/sexuality (e.g., “'I will bring myself sexual pleasure later, while thinking about this with great respect'” and “The way your t*ts bounce when I pin your arms and take you on the side of the bed…”). The words “f**k,” “sh*t,” and “a*shole” appear in dialogue.

Stay classy BioWare.

Best writers in the industry.

 

[Stainless Veteran]

Rating Summary: This is a role-playing game in which players assume the role of a warrior battling evil forces in different dimensions. Characters use swords, axes, hammers, and magic attacks to kill fantastical creatures (e.g., demons, monsters, dwarfs) and humans in melee-style combat. Cutscenes sometimes depict characters impaled or getting their throats slit. Violent sequences are often highlighted by cries of pain, gurgling/gushing sounds, and large blood-splatter effects; blood remains on the ground in several environments. The game includes some sexual material: a female character briefly depicted in front of a man's torso (fellatio is implied); characters depicted topless or with exposed buttocks while lying in bed or after sex; some dialogue referencing sex/sexuality (e.g., “'I will bring myself sexual pleasure later, while thinking about this with great respect'” and “The way your t*ts bounce when I pin your arms and take you on the side of the bed…”). The words “f**k,” “sh*t,” and “a*shole” appear in dialogue.

Stay classy BioWare.

Best writers in the industry.

That somehow reminded me of this old little gem:

 

[Angthoron]

Rating Summary: This is a role-playing game in which players assume the role of a warrior battling evil forces in different dimensions. Characters use swords, axes, hammers, and magic attacks to kill fantastical creatures (e.g., demons, monsters, dwarfs) and humans in melee-style combat. Cutscenes sometimes depict characters impaled or getting their throats slit. Violent sequences are often highlighted by cries of pain, gurgling/gushing sounds, and large blood-splatter effects; blood remains on the ground in several environments. The game includes some sexual material: a female character briefly depicted in front of a man's torso (fellatio is implied); characters depicted topless or with exposed buttocks while lying in bed or after sex; some dialogue referencing sex/sexuality (e.g., “'I will bring myself sexual pleasure later, while thinking about this with great respect'” and “The way your t*ts bounce when I pin your arms and take you on the side of the bed…”). The words “f**k,” “sh*t,” and “a*shole” appear in dialogue.

Stay classy BioWare.

Best writers in the industry.

Source?

Edit: Oh my god it's from ESRB.

Holy fucking shit

http://www.esrb.org/ratings/synopsis.jsp?Certificate=33723&Title=

Updated my journal sig.


Edit: After re-reading the rating, I have to say that it should be rated

N for Not Sure if serious.