Dragon Age: Inquisition Pre-Release Thread

[Angthoron]

This is fucking amazing

 

[Night Goat]

ESRB: In Dragon Age: Inquisition "fellatio is implied"


By Robert Purchese Published 24/10/2014

The Dragon Age series loves a bit of sex; BioWare loves a bit of sex. These are emotional adventures: they're bound to get a bit Channel 5.

But how steamy will Dragon Age: Inquisition get? Let's the let love god of age-ratings, the ESRB, explain.

"A female character briefly depicted in front of a man's torso," it rasps, "(fellatio is implied)."

"Characters depicted topless," it breathes, "or with exposed buttocks," it breathes again, "while lying in bed or after sex."

Oh there's dirty talk between characters. "I will bring myself sexual pleasure later," one politely points out, "while thinking about this with great respect."

"The way your t*ts bounce," another vividly imagines, "when I pin your arms and take you on the side of the bed..."

Oh, it gets steeeeamy. And it's for those reasons, plus silly old violence - slit throats, impaled bodies, gurgles, cries of pain - and a bit of bad language (f***, s***, a**hole) that Dragon Age: Inquisition has been rated M for Mature in the US.

The game's out here on five platforms - PC, PS4 & Xbox One, PS3 & Xbox 360 - on 21st November.

Let's the let love god of age-ratings, the ESRB, explain.

What?

 

[Angthoron]

ESRB: In Dragon Age: Inquisition "fellatio is implied"


By Robert Purchese Published 24/10/2014

The Dragon Age series loves a bit of sex; BioWare loves a bit of sex. These are emotional adventures: they're bound to get a bit Channel 5.

But how steamy will Dragon Age: Inquisition get? Let's the let love god of age-ratings, the ESRB, explain.

"A female character briefly depicted in front of a man's torso," it rasps, "(fellatio is implied)."

"Characters depicted topless," it breathes, "or with exposed buttocks," it breathes again, "while lying in bed or after sex."

Oh there's dirty talk between characters. "I will bring myself sexual pleasure later," one politely points out, "while thinking about this with great respect."

"The way your t*ts bounce," another vividly imagines, "when I pin your arms and take you on the side of the bed..."

Oh, it gets steeeeamy. And it's for those reasons, plus silly old violence - slit throats, impaled bodies, gurgles, cries of pain - and a bit of bad language (f***, s***, a**hole) that Dragon Age: Inquisition has been rated M for Mature in the US.

The game's out here on five platforms - PC, PS4 & Xbox One, PS3 & Xbox 360 - on 21st November.

Let's the let love god of age-ratings, the ESRB, explain.

What?

I've seen several articles this guy did on BioWare over the years, he really wants to become their staff writer. There was some article of his about that "Urban Fantasy" MMO, whatever it's called, by Bio, it was like syrup-covered stylistic diarrhea; there was an article in defense of Bio's clichéd writing, and now this, and every time he's more flowery than a suppository.

 

[Turrul]

I suppose Bioware is trying to make a game that cannot be parodied in any way.

 

[DeepOcean]

These could have been lifted from an 80s softporn comedy where a jolly bunch of plumbers service house wives in need.

It could have been written by my nephew of 12 or my grandmother of 94, bless her.

Another option is that it originated from a different reality where this is considered good or funny or something.

I don't know about the reality you came from, but in our reality, BioWare is widely known for having some of the best writers in the industry and is commonly referenced as such by various media outlets.

Anyway, what can you expect from an industry where Ryse get an award for best gameplay and Fallout 3 for best writing?

 

[Abu Antar]

I suppose Bioware is trying to make a game that cannot be parodied in any way.

How can you make a parody out of a parody?

 

[RPGMaster]

I suppose Bioware is trying to make a game that cannot be parodied in any way.

How can you make a parody out of a parody?

By making it shit? Scary Movie did it.

 

[eremita]

New stream: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rkT_ugwDHzA
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rkT_ugwDHzA

EDIT: Some nice low level fights right from the beginning of part 2.

 

[meanwhileInPoland]

lol at Cameron letting Laidlaw win that fight for him what a faggot

that is one awesome looking location.

i guess we cant fuck that female dwarf scout?

 

[Tytus]

lol at Cameron letting Laidlaw win that fight for him what a faggot

that is one awesome looking location.

i guess we cant fuck that female dwarf scout?

Because you want to fuck Dwarfs I have something for you:

http://imgur.com/a/t4ufO

 

[meanwhileInPoland]

lol at Cameron letting Laidlaw win that fight for him what a faggot

that is one awesome looking location.

i guess we cant fuck that female dwarf scout?

Because you want to fuck Dwarfs I have something for you:

http://imgur.com/a/t4ufO

its not much of a choice

one looks like a tranny and is supposedly a lesbian so i cant even ravage her anus

and the other hand

 

[Commissar Draco]

lol at Cameron letting Laidlaw win that fight for him what a faggot

that is one awesome looking location.

i guess we cant fuck that female dwarf scout?

Because you want to fuck Dwarfs I have something for you:

http://imgur.com/a/t4ufO

its not much of a choice

one looks like a tranny and is supposedly a lesbian so i cant even ravage her anus

and the other hand

Well this looks hot and fuck-able in comparison to all other ugly trannies females Commissar seen in DAI so... and obligatory: Behead those who Insult Dwarves!

 

[Kem0sabe]

The scenery actually looks very well done, fights and UI tho... Crap

 

[Space Satan]

FFS this thread is opening a rift to the warp. Madness, filth and corruption is leaking into real space 24\7.

Anyway, 2deep4u via tumblr and other shitholes ahoy:

 

[racofer]

I like what a see of DAI so far.

No motivation to even try it out is one hell of an improvement from Bioware.

 

[Hepler's Vagina]

I like what a see of DAI so far.

No motivation to even try it out is one hell of an improvement from Bioware.

Yes they always dangled a little teaser weiner for RPG fans in the form of some toolkit or a bit of awkward lip service to baldur's gate or tactical combat or whatever. This is the first game that not only wants the call of duty audience but also has a neon FUCK YOU to RPG gamers, so kudos to Laidlaw & co.

 

[Wulfric Pinewood]

Despite all flaws it will be much better game as crpg than Witcher 3. I always preferred even weakest crpg than hn's. For sure both titles will not be best games but DA:I will be much better for any crpg player than W3.

 

[racofer]

Despite all flaws it will be much better game as crpg than Witcher 3. I always preferred even weakest crpg than hn's. For sure both titles will not be best games but DA:I will be much better for any crpg player than W3.

That's like saying a 9mm bullet to the head is better than a .38 bullet to the head.........

 

[Wulfric Pinewood]

Sure but 9mm leave smaller hole

 

[Athos]

Despite all flaws it will be much better game as crpg than Witcher 3. I always preferred even weakest crpg than hn's. For sure both titles will not be best games but DA:I will be much better for any crpg player than W3.

But in the Witcher 3 at least you won't have a party made of annoying crack smokers and emo kids. Choices, choices...

 

[RPGMaster]

lol at Cameron letting Laidlaw win that fight for him what a faggot

that is one awesome looking location.

i guess we cant fuck that female dwarf scout?

Because you want to fuck Dwarfs I have something for you:

http://imgur.com/a/t4ufO

That took an awful long time to get to a punchline that didn't come.

 

[Stainless Veteran]

Despite all flaws it will be much better game as crpg than Witcher 3. I always preferred even weakest crpg than hn's. For sure both titles will not be best games but DA:I will be much better for any crpg player than W3.

But in the Witcher 3 at least you won't have a party made of annoying crack smokers and emo kids. Choices, choices...

I think the choice is apparent:

 

[pippin]

it moves just like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSbyPr5PXDg

also,

 

[meanwhileInPoland]

Despite all flaws it will be much better game as crpg than Witcher 3. I always preferred even weakest crpg than hn's. For sure both titles will not be best games but DA:I will be much better for any crpg player than W3.

But in the Witcher 3 at least you won't have a party made of annoying crack smokers and emo kids. Choices, choices...

I think the choice is apparent:

yea one is treacherous slut with fake tits and shit-tone of magical make up and the other is sweaty crossfit virgin.
i hope there are some brothels in both games

 

[Stainless Veteran]

Despite all flaws it will be much better game as crpg than Witcher 3. I always preferred even weakest crpg than hn's. For sure both titles will not be best games but DA:I will be much better for any crpg player than W3.

But in the Witcher 3 at least you won't have a party made of annoying crack smokers and emo kids. Choices, choices...

I think the choice is apparent:

yea one is treacherous slut with fake tits and shit-tone of magical make up and the other is sweaty crossfit virgin.
i hope there are some brothels in both games

Behead all who insult Triss!


Brothels in Witcher games are like bees and honey, can't have one without the other. Bioware though, especially with their SJW bent, have rather questionable taste in whores: